The United States of Rebellia

by RJ Pritchett

  “Is it a boy or a girl?” Yolanda asked, smiling as she rubbed the pregnant belly that contained her aunt or uncle. How crazy does that sound?

  “It’s a… surprise,” my dad announced, laughing so hard that I couldn’t see his eyes anymore, “we don’t even know. The gender of the baby will be revealed tonight at Leilani’s.”

  “At Leilani’s what?” Dimitri asked.

  “It’s a restaurant next to the beach, Dumbo,” Yolanda said, threatening to smack Dimitri on the back of the head with her body language.

  “So your name is Leilani, and the name of the restaurant is Leilani too?” Dimitri said as if he discovered how magic worked, “That’s crazy.”

  “Yes, Grandson. Now. Let’s hurry and get settled in so we can hurry up and go to the restaurant,” my dad said, rushing us towards the house.

  The interior of the house was just as beautiful as the outside. I was so captivated by the place that I recognized as my dream home -I didn’t even hear Leilani speaking to me.”

  “I know, right?” I said, hoping that would be a good reply to whatever she just said. But when I looked at her, she scrunched her face at me.

  “So you think I’m getting fat too?” she asked, “You were supposed to comfort me.”

  “Ooh. I’m so sorry, Leilani. Truth be told, I wasn’t even paying attention to you. I didn’t hear a word you said. I was too busy looking at all of this. That fountain over there is so beautiful. These lights, that table, this place is perfect. I can tell the kids love it too.”

  “Your father wanted this visit to feel so special for you and the kids,” Leilani said, rubbing her stomach again.

  Seeing her rub her stomach, distracted me from the house for a quick moment. I can’t believe that this baby is going to be my brother or sister. I’m for- much too old to be having newborns for siblings.

  “Yeah, I know the real reason my dad wants to make this trip special,” I smiled, “he probably doesn’t want me to leave.”

  “Well, he talks about you all the time,” Leilani said, “he’s always telling Kiko about you. His favorite Maaria stories to tell are the times he used to take you to the gun range and how you became a better shooter than anybody at the range. He brags about how well you did in school, how you’re a doctor now. He always brags about you. It’s like you never left. I bet Kiko hates you by now. I know I got pretty sick of hearing about you after a while,” we both laughed.

  Thanks to my dad, my bags were already in the room with my name on a piece of paper taped to the white wooden door. I saw them as soon as I pushed the door open.

  The room was big, the bed was humungous. This bed was way too big for just one person but I’m not the one to complain. It’s nice. I sat on it to see how soft it is, and the bed was very soft. It was a foam mattress that seemed to suck me inside of it and trap me. I felt paralyzed by it, but not in a bad way. I didn’t want to move because I was so comfortable. I didn’t feel the jetlag at first, but once I laid on that bed… I immediately… felt… exhausted.

  There was a sound coming from the connected bathroom. A tapping noise. But I was too relaxed to get up. I heard the creaking of the bathroom door opening and my eyes opened.

  “Who’s that?” I asked without turning my head. There was no answer. The only thing that followed my question was a few light footsteps getting closer to me. “Dimitri, I know that’s you,” I said, almost smiling, “you can’t scare m-” a pair of big, strong hands wrapped themselves around my neck and pushed me deeper into the mattress, suffocating me. I tried to scream, but the scream couldn’t escape through these hands around my throat. I wasn’t strong enough to get these pair of hands off of me and I damn sure couldn’t see who was choking me because, by the time I looked up, everything was fading.

  * * *

  “Mom! Mom! Wake up!” Dimitri said.

  My eyes opened in a panic, I was sweating and breathing heavy. I started touching my neck as if I could still feel the hands choking me, but they weren’t there. Nothing was. I wasn’t even in my bedroom anymore, I was laying on the beach with Yolanda, Leilani, Kiko, and Dimitri looking down at me.

  “I think you were having a bad dream,” Leilani said.

  “Yeah,” Kiko smiled, “you were all like… Ah! Dimitri. I know it’s you,” he said that in a strange voice that sounded as if I were choking when I said it. Everyone laughed except Leilani.

  “Are you okay?” Leilani asked.

  “Yeah. I’m fine,” I said almost immediately, “ I just had a dream Dimitri played a prank on me. That’s all,” I lied. Even in hindsight, I can’t explain that little nightmare I had that day. I don’t know. I just know that when I looked at the sunset, I was much calmer.

  One of my favorite things to do as a little girl in Hawaii was to watch the sunset on the beach. Sunsets are beautiful anywhere on earth, but Hawaii… I don’t want to make it seem like I keep bragging about Hawaii, so never mind. I laid down with warm sand on the other end of my blanket and my son rubbing my back, to comfort me after the bad dream. This is how I always used to calm him down when he had nightmares.

  “Wow. This is beautiful. Right, Yolanda?” I said, turning from the horizon to her.

  “Yeah, it’s alright,” Yolanda said, eyes glued to her phone.

  “She didn’t even look,” Dimitri said as he stopped rubbing my back and started digging in the sand.

  “Yo, Dimitri. You wanna ride with me? The waves are always better around this time.” Kiko said, hoisting his surfboard over his shoulder, “my mom said it’s because… something about the moon rising causing the waves or something like that.”

  Yolanda snickered, “Dimitri can’t surf or swim. He’d drown… On second thought, Dimitri. You should give it a shot.”

  “Shut up.”

  “You don’t know how to surf? How come you don’t know how to surf?” Kiko looked at me, even though he was talking to Dimitri.

  “We don’t really surf in New Jersey,” Dimitri said.

  “Dang,” Kiko said, “Y'all don’t have nice beaches in New Jersey, Y'all don’t have nice weather all year round in New Jersey, Y'all don’t surf in New Jersey. What do y’all do in New Jersey?”

  “We have this pretty cool museum…”

  “… Okay.” Kiko didn’t seem too fond of museums, “I can show you how to surf. It’s pretty easy. It’s like riding a skateboard but on water. It’s super fun. Come on,” Kiko ran to the water.

  “Is it too late to tell him I don’t know how to ride a skateboard either?” Dimitri asked me before running after him.

  It was so funny watching him try to run normally on the sand. It’s like every step he was falling into a small sand pit. He was definitely out of his element.

  “Aren’t you going to go for a swim?” I asked, looking at my daughter.

  She just shook her head, “I don’t really feel like it right now. I already went to watch some surfing competition they had earlier. There were so many Greek Gods out here…” Yolanda said, eyes glued to her phone, “I took a picture with the runner-up of the whole competition. He looked so much better than the winner. He even gave me his phone number before he went home,” Yolanda found it hard to contain her smile, “I’m texting him right now. He’s so nice. He’s a little upset about coming in second place, so I’m comforting him.”

  “Oh, Maaria. You’re finally awake, Sleepyhead,” my dad said, sitting down next to me and handing me a glass of Hang Ten. I haven’t had one of these in forever.

  “Thanks,” I said, taking my first sip.

  When the sky got darker, Dimitri and Kiko got back from surfing. Apparently, Dimitri has already gotten the hang of it. My dad was so proud when Kiko announced that to everybody. “Surfing is in Akamu blood,” my dad said over and over. He even offered to teach Yolanda surfing one of these days. My brother Kona and sister Aaliyah finally showed up along with a few of my dad’s friends and Leilani’s family members. I always speak to Kona, but Aaliyah and I have spent the next ho
ur catching up on everything in our lives. She missed me a lot, and the feeling was definitely mutual.

  “Hi, Uncle!” Yolanda said when she saw one of my dad’s friends that she recognized from many years ago.

  “Who’s that guy?” Dimitri asked her.

  “That’s my dad’s best friend, Haku,” Kiko answered, “he was the best surfer in the world back when he had hair and abs. He’s washed up now. I’m probably a better surfer than he is now.”

  “Why’d you call him Uncle then?” Dimitri laughed while facing Yolanda, “You had me thinking that guy was really our Uncle.”

  “In Hawaii, nearly everyone’s our Uncle, Aunt or Cousin…” I jumped in to explain to Dimitri.

  “… That’s weird. How is everybody related?” Dimitri asked.

  “This boy is so dumb,” Yolanda shook her head, eyes glued to her phone.

  “It’s a sign of respect. It’s like we’re one big happy family,” I said.

  “Okay, time for the gender reveal, guys. Are we all ready?” my sister Aaliyah announced to nearly everyone on the beach.

  Leilani took a deep breath as we all huddled together. Even people I didn’t know joined in. Leilani grabbed my father’s hand and we all nodded when Aaliyah asked again.

  “Yes,” I said as Yolanda started recording with her cell phone. I swear that girl and her cell phone were inseparable.

  A loud boom sounded off, followed by a screeching sound, followed by another explosion. As the explosions came more frequently and I saw the color of the fireworks, the answer was clear as day. Leilani cried tears of joy and hugged my dad. My dad was happy, everybody around us was happy at the result. The pink fireworks let us all know that the baby was a girl. I had a baby sister on the way.

  The ride back to the house was a quick one. I didn’t even want to go back into that house after the dream I had on the beach. I got goosebumps every time I thought about that dream while in the car. I tried to subtly invite Dimitri to sleep in my room, so I wouldn’t be alone, but he told me that I was creeping him out and he didn’t speak to me for the rest of the night. There was once a time when I couldn’t get that boy to sleep in his own bed at all. Crazy how life works sometimes.

  Once I got into the room, I checked the bathroom to make sure no one was in there. I checked under the bed and in the closet. I even went to lock the bedroom door, so nobody could sneak in. When I went to lock the door, I heard my dad and Leilani arguing -in a heated discussion about something. I felt like a kid when I stopped what I was doing to listen to their exchange.

  “Are you serious right now, Halo?” Leilani asked, “Please tell me you’re not.”

  “It’s for all of our protection,” my dad said.

  “Having that around me doesn’t make me feel protected,” Leilani said, “We have children in the house. You don’t know what their curious minds would do if they find out this is here.”

  “And that’s exactly why they won’t,” my dad said.

  It was my time to see what the discussion was about and when I went into the doorway, I saw immediately. I froze the same way my dad and Leilani did when they saw me.

  “You see?” Leilani said, “What if that was one of the boys?”

  “Close the door please, Maaria,” my dad said. I closed the door behind me softly.

  “What’s the problem?” I asked, even though the problem was plain as day. I just wanted to hear them tell me.

  “As you can see, your father wants to keep this gun in our bedroom. The room that’s a part of the house with your son and my son in it. What do you think about that?” Leilani asked me. I paused before answering, giving my dad enough time to speak before me. My eyes were locked onto the Desert Eagle my dad held in his beefy hands.

  “It won’t be out in the open. It’ll be locked in the safe like always,” my dad said, using his free hand to point to the corner of the room where he placed the small safe.

  I’ve been smuggling snacks out of that safe for almost my entire childhood. But that’s because I knew the combination was the date of my mom and dad’s wedding. Yolanda and Dimitri shouldn’t know it… and I doubt Kiko knows when my mom and dad were married. He probably knows little to nothing about my mom.

  “I don’t feel safe with that thing in the house with these kids around,” Leilani said, “What do you think, Maaria?”

  I immediately thought about that dream -nightmare I had earlier. An intruder breaking into my room and choking me while I was powerless. “Um…” I said, “I think it’s better safe than sorry.”

  “See,” Leilani said, eyeing my dad. “Maaria wants us to be safe and not have that thing around our kids.”

  “… Sorry, Leilani,” I said, pouting a little, “but I meant that it’ll be better to have it around in case something happens. You never know. I’ve always felt safe with it in the house growing up and I would feel safe if it’s with us now. How about this, Leilani? How about I keep the safe in my room? Would that make you feel better?”

  “A little,” Leilani said.

  “Okay then, Dad. Lock the gun away in the safe and give it to me,” I said it as if I was his parent, but he listened without arguing or hesitating even a little bit, unlike my kids.

  When the safe was in my room, I felt much better. My door was locked, my room was free of intruders (I checked again), and the light from the TV kept the room illuminated just enough for me to see my surroundings.

  I slept in that morning without even noticing. When I got out of bed, it was past noon. I quickly brushed my hair and teeth before going downstairs in my pajamas. Kiko and Dimitri were playing video games and Leilani watched them, holding her hands on her belly.

  “How about Leilani junior?” Dimitri said.

  I assumed they were picking names for the new baby. Kiko and Leilani laughed at Dimitri’s ridiculous suggestion.

  “Oh, Maaria. Glad you’re finally up. If it’s okay with you, I decided to let you sleep in. Dimitri told me that you barely get to sleep in because of work, and also because of him and Yolanda. I fixed breakfast for everybody. Yours is in the kitchen, wrapped up. You might want to heat it up a little though.”

  “Thank you so much,” I said, almost bowing. I caught myself at the last minute and walked into the kitchen.

  While I’m readying my Taro bagels and heating up the rest of my breakfast, I hear the door open. It was Yolanda when I went to take a look. She was holding a cerulean surfboard and wearing a helmet on her head. “Surfing was amazing today,” she said with the biggest smile ever.

  “Why are you wearing a helmet?” I asked, trying not to laugh.

  “I have a role to play,” Yolanda said, “I’m supposed to be the lovable foreigner. I made Keanu laugh when he saw it. Keanu is the guy from the competition yesterday. He gave me surfing lessons today.”

  “So you went out all alone to the beach to meet a guy that you barely know…” I said.

  “I didn’t go alone. Grandpa took me there. Apparently, he knows Keanu and his family. He says they’re nice people,” Yolanda said, still blushing, “He’s taking me out on a date tonight. Keanu… not Grandpa.”

  “I don’t know how I feel about this…” I said, sitting down at the dining room table, “Don’t you think you should slow down and get to know him more before you-”

  “Mom, we’re only in Hawaii for like two and a half weeks. How long do you think I should wait before going on a date with a guy that I like? A guy that I’m probably never going to see again…” Yolanda asked me. I had no answer.

  “Just slow down… a little bit. Is Grandpa going on that date with you?”

  “Nope. Grandpa, Leilani, and the boys are going to the movies tonight,” Yolanda said.

  I should go with her to make sure this guy is alright by my standards.

  “I’ll be fine, Mom. Keanu’s a nice guy. You’ll love him, eventually,” Yolanda continued, “We’re probably just going out to eat, and I’ll be back. I’ll tell you all about it when I get back. I’m
so excited.”

  “Maybe I should go with you. Just in case something happens.”

  “What? No!” Yolanda said, “I can’t bring my mom on a date with a boy, that’s weird and it might scare him away. Besides, wouldn’t Keanu and I really be moving too fast if he met my mom?”

  She got me there… “Alright. Just be safe and watch out for the signs we spoke about before. We don’t need another Leslie situation.”

  “Who?” Yolanda said, laughing as she walked away, “I don’t even know who that is anymore.”

  * * *

  My mind was everywhere while Yolanda was out with that boy. I stalked her Instagram account the entire night, she posts everything there. There’s a bunch of videos and photos of the first two days we’ve been in Hawaii. Her last post was forty minutes ago when Keanu picked her up. That was strange to me. I looked at the picture she uploaded of this Keanu guy after the competition and his smile seemed strange to me. He didn’t look particularly happy (which could be because he didn’t win first place in the competition). His hair was obviously wet, falling over parts of his face. He was handsome, I’ll admit. He was shirtless, showing off his abs, and he had his arm wrapped around my daughter’s waist as she stuck her tongue out in the picture. While sporting the cute bikini I helped her pick out, Yolanda’s left hand made the peace sign and the people around them in the background stared at them lovingly. It was a nice picture, and it got a lot of attention. It was posted just a day ago and it had over a thousand likes. The caption of this photo was: ‘Just when you thought Hawaii couldn’t get any more beautiful…’ with a couple of heart emojis, a sun emoji, a wave emoji, and a beach emoji. I looked through the hundreds of comments to see a bunch of people echoing the same thought, talking about how good these two looked together. One of Yolanda’s friends commented ‘Out with the old, in with the new. #Upgrade’

  I saw one comment that wasn’t like the others. It was just one word. One word that caused my heart to jump. The person wrote ‘Wow’ and that’s it. I looked to see who wrote that -and low and behold, it was Leslie, Yolanda’s ex.