The Rat

by Louise Collins

  “You’re only saying it because you feel guilty, and even after you’ve told me all this, I still feel like I betrayed you. I still feel guilty. I fell for you, and I continued ratting you out to Hamish.”

  “I fell for you, and I continued to lie to your face. We’re both as guilty as each other. Look… Do you still want me?”

  Rory snorted. “I thought you were gonna kill me today.”

  “But do you still want me?”

  Rory raised his head and pressed his palm over his heart. It wasn’t an empty hole, it hurt, and ached, but his heart was still there. It was thumping beneath his ribs, an excited hopeful beat that was the only answer he needed. “Yes.”

  “And I want you, Rory.”

  Sebastian took his hand and slotted their fingers together. He squeezed, and Rory squeezed back. “I love you, and I fucking hate William Hamish.”

  “What are you gonna do?”

  “Celebrate my freedom with a big bang, just like I told you…”

  ****

  When Sebastian asked him to drive to Jameson’s farm, Rory gave him a long stare, then programmed the address into the car. They sat in silence, like they had on the beach, and drove the two-hour route. The revelation spun in Rory’s head, gaining momentum until he feared it would destroy him, then he heard Sebastian’s voice saying he loved him, and it was enough to slow the spinning, but not stop it completely.

  The sky grew dark, and the houses fewer, until Rory squinted and spotted the shabby looking farmhouse in the distance.

  “Jameson’s farm.” Sebastian sighed.

  “I still don’t understand.” Rory murmured.

  “You will.”

  Rory pulled up alongside the other cars and peered through the windscreen. He could see a group of people.

  “Friends of mine, eager to welcome me back.” Sebastian explained.

  Rory forced a swallow, then nodded.

  Sebastian squeezed his knee. “Relax, there’s nothing to worry about.”

  Rory spotted Hamish amongst the crowd, and his heart accelerated.

  “What’s going on?” He asked.

  “Looks like Hamish is trespassing on my land.”

  “Your land?”

  Sebastian snorted, then yanked on the handle. Rory followed him out of the car, but kept a few meters’ distance between them as they approached the group. He stayed in the shadows and leaned against the farmhouse.

  “Problem?” Sebastian mumbled, shoving his hands in his pockets. The group dispersed, then surrounded Hamish and Sebastian.

  Hamish shook a piece of paper in his hand. “This is my land.”

  “Your land?”

  “Yes, you are trespassing, and I’ll call the police.”

  “Let them come. They’ll see that you’re the one in the wrong.”

  “I bought this farm.”

  Sebastian whistled. “Yeah? How much for?”

  “A lot.”

  “The whole farm?”

  “Yes.”

  Sebastian shook his head. “Nope. You really should read the small print before you sign, and part with your money.”

  Hamish took an unsteady step back. “What?”

  “You own a small patch, 5 meters by 5 meters,” Sebastian muttered, before pointing into the distance, “Somewhere over there.”

  “Liar.”

  “I’m not lying. This place is mine.”

  “Over my dead body.”

  “Don’t tempt me… How’s life been treating you lately?”

  “What?”

  “Your wife’s left you, you’re in debt, being harassed, paranoid someone’s out to get you. You’re not looking well, Hamish.”

  “Fuck you.”

  “I’m glad you’re suffering, the same way you made Lester suffer.”

  Hamish wagged his finger at Sebastian. “You murdered him.”

  Sebastian hung his head. “I did, and I wish I could turn back time and change that, but I can’t. What I can do, is make your life crumble, the same way you did to him, all to get him to set me up.”

  “You helped terrorists, gangs, criminals, and you got rich off it. You’re the lowest of the low, and someone had to take you down. Someone had to stop you, and I’m proud that it was me.”

  “I ended up inside because of my anger. My stupidity. Not because of your cunning. I’ve served my sentence, and I will regret what I did for the rest of my life, but I couldn’t let you get away with it.”

  Rory turned when he heard a car. Morris got out, made her way closer then stood next to Sebastian.

  “Wh—what?”

  “Sebastian’s an old friend of mine.”

  Hamish’s jaw dropped, and he shook his head. “No.”

  “The things I do for my friends.” Morris mumbled before shuddering.

  “I left my wife for you.”

  “And by the looks of her social media account, she’s loving every minute of her new-found freedom.”

  “It was your idea I buy the farm.”

  Sebastian raised his hand. “Actually, it was my idea. Morris made it happen. How much debt are you in now?”

  “You bastard.”

  “Takes one to know one.”

  Hamish turned his attention back to Morris. “Your career is over—”

  “My career? What about yours? You didn’t have clearance to put Rory in that prison. You went rogue, and when the chief inspector finds out, it’s your career that’ll be finished.”

  “I’ll take you down with me.”

  “What evidence do you have? I thought it was legit, I thought it had been authorized, me and Rory were the unlucky ones that got used, and you can’t prove otherwise. We’ll probably get compensation.”

  “Bitch…”

  “Now if you don’t mind,” Sebastian muttered, “kindly get off my property. I apologize in advance for the noise tonight.”

  Morris reached into her bag and passed Sebastian a bottle of champagne.

  “See, I’m celebrating with a pop…”

  The cork blasted into the air, and drink bubbled from the top. Sebastian took a long glug, then sighed in pleasure. Rory frowned, then remembered Sebastian’s words when they were inside the prison. The last thing Hamish would hear before his world comes crushing down, would be a pop.

  “And a big bang…”

  Rory knocked his head back into the house at the sound of the first firework. They went off like no display Rory had ever seen, hundreds of fireworks exploding into the sky. He thought of the barrels Sebastian had got his friend to store, the powders, the chemicals, and glanced back up at the sky. The big bang wasn’t a bomb, but fireworks.

  The sky lit up with sparkles of red, green and gold. The bright colors lit up the darkness, and Hamish looked in dismay at the sky, then back at Sebastian. His gaze drifted, and he found Rory against the farmhouse.

  Rory couldn’t hear what words were growled his way, but Hamish’s face folded with angry lines, and his lips pulled back with his furious words. He marched at Rory, but Sebastian side-stepped in front of him. Morris took the bottle from Sebastian, then turned back to the fireworks.

  Sebastian and Hamish exchanged snarls, and angry expressions, and the strobe-lighting effect of the fireworks would’ve been amusing had Rory not been so physically, and mentally exhausted.

  Hamish walked away, throwing Rory one final glare before getting in his car. Sebastian watched him go, gave him a patronizing wave before jogging over to Rory.

  “You okay?” Sebastian whispered into his ear.

  Rory shook his head, and Sebastian pulled him into a hug. He wasn’t okay, he was far from it, but with Sebastian holding him, and him clinging back, he thought maybe, one day, he would be.

  Epilogue

  Rory sat long enough for the damp to seep through his pants. His knees were drawn up to his chest, and his eyes were fixed on his sister’s name. The granite headstone had speckles of gold, and when it caught the sun, it sparkled.

  He’d fille
d the pots at the base of the headstone with daffodils, and the yellow brightened up the graveyard. Even during the coldest spells of winter, he made sure there was some color by Erica.

  Six months had passed since the service and it was nothing but a blur in his mind, but he tried not to dwell. Sebastian had got him through it, and afterwards he was left with a hollowness he didn’t know how to fill. Sometimes it felt so overwhelming he thought he wouldn’t get through another day, but Sebastian stepped in, held him together until he was ready to take on the next one.

  Rory sensed Sebastian before he saw him, and when he got closer, he looked over his shoulder.

  “Officer down, does he request back up?”

  Rory snorted, shook his head, then got to his feet. He was still wearing his uniform, but had loosened his tie, and untucked his shirt.

  Sebastian tugged him close and kissed his cheek.

  “Did I worry you again?” Rory mumbled at his collarbone.

  “I knew where you’d be. I like the flowers.”

  Rory glanced back at them and nodded. He knew Erica would’ve approved.

  “Ready to go?”

  “Yeah.”

  Sebastian led him away from the tombstone, towards the gate that led to the cemetery.

  “Home,” he murmured.

  Rory repeated the word back, then smiled softy. Sebastian gestured to the car, and Rory got inside. He clung to the seat, and when Sebastian noticed, he tutted.

  “You don’t have to do that anymore…”

  “I still haven’t gotten over the first time I let you drive.”

  “It had been sixteen years … I was a little rusty.”

  “A little...”

  Sebastian narrowed his eyes and started the car. Rory undid his tie, then shoved it in his pocket. His hand brushed something hard, and he pulled out his police ID badge.

  He didn’t think he’d go back, but Sebastian encouraged him to try before making any rash decisions. The first few weeks, he forced himself to go to work, then he did it for routine, then for purpose, before finally enjoying being a police officer. He had a team he got on with, and a boss worthy of his respect.

  Some days were boring, some were funny, some scary, and others draining. Rory had just had a draining day, and he went to speak to Erica to clear his head.

  “Long day?”

  Rory hummed. “Yeah. I was called to a traffic collision”

  Sebastian’s jaw tightened. “Everyone okay?”

  “There were injuries, but they should all be okay.”

  “Good.”

  “What about you?” Rory asked.

  “I’m finalizing plans for the Jameson’s farm plot. Think of it—houses, flats, small shops.”

  “You go from conning men, to a legitimate property developer…”

  “For now.”

  Rory raised his eyebrow. “What do you mean for now?”

  “Who knows what the future will bring.”

  “Don’t you ever worry about the people you’ve conned finding you…”

  Sebastian flashed him a look. “No, do you?”

  Rory bit his lip. “Yes. I can’t lose you.”

  “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “But—”

  “No buts Rory. I’m not going anywhere. No one’s going to take me from you, and no one’s gonna take you from me, they wouldn’t dare. Don’t worry yourself with that, worry about how close I’ll build a Foodles to our new house.”

  “Oodles,” Rory corrected.

  “Yeah, one of them, too…”

  He knew Sebastian was trying to make him smile and hated that it worked.

  “What about Hamish?”

  Sebastian sighed through his nose. “He’s put his house up for sale, but with all the building traffic, and the sound, and dust, I doubt he’ll get the price he wants for it. I may even take pity on him and offer to buy it.”

  “I think he’d rather burn it to the ground.”

  Sebastian tipped his head back and barked a laugh.

  ****

  The apartment was only a short drive, and when Rory looked up, a small smile tickled his lips. They ate together, had sex, worked out, and played chess, just like they had inside, but they did new things, too. Sebastian liked behind outside, he liked walking through woodlands, across fields, and beaches. Their hands linked as they walked, and Rory’s heart always did an excited thump when Sebastian reached for him.

  Sebastian liked Oodles, but hated Flip Over with a burning passion. They ate chips at Rashford pier and sat on the bench where all their lies had come out into the open. Rory felt a little less alone and broken each day, and when he told Sebastian, he said he felt the same.

  Rory had a home with Sebastian, a life, and when he walked into the hall, he released a long breath, shut his eyes, and stood for a few seconds. Sebastian came up behind him and rubbed his shoulders.

  “You’ve got another letter from Captain.”

  “You read it?”

  “Nope. It’s in the kitchen.”

  Sebastian released him, and Rory strolled into the kitchen. He ripped open the letter, and his eyes roamed Captain’s scribbly handwriting. He’d been seeing Jenkins regularly, and although he didn’t say so in the letters, Rory hoped the sessions were helping. In each letter he always wrote a paragraph about Ollie, and Rory’s heart soared when Captain told him Leo had been to visit. His own visiting orders were still going unanswered, but he hoped with enough time, Ollie would give him a chance to explain.

  Sebastian stepped into the kitchen and flung his jacket at the back of a chair. His tank top clung to his chest, and Rory gave him an appreciative look.

  “I was gonna do pesto pasta for dinner?”

  Rory scrunched his nose and put the letter down. “I’ll cook.”

  “I’m not that bad.”

  “Yeah, you kinda are…”

  “You’ve got a weak stomach, that’s all it is.”

  Rory snorted. “Weak after you poisoned it… Where’s the recipe?”

  “On my laptop.”

  Rory snorted, walked over to the laptop, and flicked the lid open. He froze at what the web-browser had been left on. “How to cheat at chess.”

  Sebastian rushed over. “It’s a typo. It should say how to get better at chess.”

  “It definitely says cheat.”

  “Nah.” Sebastian reached for the laptop, but Rory slid it away.

  “I can’t believe you.”

  Sebastian raised his hands. “Okay, Officer Matterson, you’ve got me.”

  “Caught you in the act, you’re in for it now.”

  A noise close to a purr escaped Sebastian’s lips, and his pupils darkened.

  “Surely there must be something I can do to keep you quiet.”

  Rory matched Sebastian’s coy smile with his own. “Like what?”

  Sebastian stepped closer, and a devouring expression came over his face. Rory resisted the urge to back into the cupboard door.

  “Well, I don’t have any money to bribe you with…”

  “What are you on about, you’ve got loads.”

  Sebastian hushed him and picked at the buttons of Rory’s shirt. “Maybe I could bribe you in other ways.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “Maybe I can give you favors, and you’ll forgive my little misdemeanor.”

  Rory looked down at Sebastian’s fingers making quick work of his buttons, and then his belt. He got to his knees and pulled Rory’s pants down, and nuzzled his face into Rory’s crotch.

  “What about it, Officer Matterson?” Sebastian murmured into the fabric.

  The vibrations tickled Rory’s cock, and he bucked his hips. Sebastian caught him and held him steady.

  “Suck my cock,” Rory whispered.

  “And you’ll let me go without charge?”

  Rory nodded. “I’ll let you go.”

  Sebastian yanked down Rory’s boxers, and they joined his pants trapped at his knees. He grabbed the base
of Rory’s cock with both hands, opened his mouth wide so Rory could see, then slid the wet ellipse down Rory’s length until his mouth met his hands.

  Rory threw his head back. “Fuck…”

  Sebastian bobbed his head forward and back, keeping his lips tight when he withdrew to Rory’s sensitive head. He sucked greedily, but steadily, and in no time, Rory was snorting breaths through his nose, and starting to shake. The cupboard door rattled behind him, and he tried to grip it, but his sweaty hands slipped.

  Sebastian ran his mouth back along Rory’s cock until his lips pressed against his two-handed grip. Instead of drawing back, he stayed where he was with Rory deep in his mouth. The sight made Rory’s head spin, and he open mouthed panted down at where his body joined Sebastian’s.

  The mouth on Rory started sucking, just a pull of pressure every few seconds. Each time it happened a moan tore from Rory’s throat, and morphed into a sob. He couldn’t hold back, and the last intense tug from Sebastian’s mouth sent him crashing over.

  Rory whimpered and sobbed as he came, brain whiting out when he was hit with such a powerful tingling. Sebastian hummed as he swallowed the spurts, then he drew back, and shot Rory a cocky smile.

  “That good, officer?”

  Rory nodded. “Yes, thank you.”

  Sebastian got to his feet and placed his hands on Rory’s shoulders. “Just so we’re clear, if someone offers you ‘special favors’ you say…”

  “Yes, please?”

  Sebastian pinched Rory’s nipple, and he yelped.

  “I say no, of course I’d say no.”

  “Good, because you’re mine.” Sebastian gestured down at himself. “Now, I’m gonna take you into the other room, and sort this out.”

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  Rory leaned down, yanked up his pants, then allowed Sebastian to stalk him into the bedroom. The back of his knees met the edge of the bed, and Sebastian pushed him down.

  It had been six months since they’d been inside the prison, but the double bed still felt odd. They had room to work with, different positions to try, and afterwards in the glow of orgasm, they could lay together.

  The Vaseline pot had been replaced by a bottle of lube, and instead of unscrewing the lid to get Rory hard, all Sebastian had to do was tap the bottle on the bedside table.