Rugged Cowboy

by Elana Johnson

  Dallas stood too, watching as Ted moved out of the way to reveal a gorgeous brunette standing on his front porch. “Jess,” he said, casting a glance to Thomas. “I’ve got to talk to Jess for a minute, okay, bud? Ted’s going to sit here with you.”

  “Okay, Dad.”

  He met his friend’s eye and went past him to join Jess on the porch. “Hey.” He gathered her into his arms as Ted closed the door behind them, giving them a measure of privacy.

  Jess said nothing, but she clung to him in a way that made Dallas feel special and important.

  “I’m sorry about last night,” he said.

  “What happened?” She stepped back and looked at him, a questioning look on her face.

  Dallas sighed and ran his hands through his hair. “Uh, I’d rather not involve you.”

  “Involve me?” Her dark eyes flashed, and Dallas saw lightning and thunder in her expression.

  “Jess,” he said. “I just…I’m looking for Martha.”

  Horror crossed her face, but she wiped it away quickly. “Okay. I get it. I see.” She started down the steps, obviously headed back to her car.

  “Jess?”

  “She was your wife, and you want her back. I get it.” She tossed the words over her shoulder like they meant nothing to her, and it took Dallas a few moments to make sense of them in his head.

  By that time, Jess had made it back to her car. She sat behind the wheel already. Dallas went down the steps in a jog and hurried toward her. “Wait, wait,” he said. “That’s not true at all.”

  All of her windows were up, and she glared at him through the glass. He put both palms against the glass, and said, “Jess, wait. You’re wrong.”

  She cracked the window and he continued, almost desperate for her not to drive away believing he was looking for Martha because he wanted her back. “I don’t want Martha back. I need to find her so her thugs will stop bothering me.”

  Jess simply stared at him. “Her thugs?”

  “I couldn’t take you to dinner last night, because when I got home yesterday, there were two guys here, and they made me work on their truck for five hours. I locked the kids in the bedroom to protect them, and they were terrified and crying by the time I finished after eight p.m.”

  Jess killed the engine and got out of the car. She stared at Dallas, her eyes wide. “Are you serious?”

  “Yes.” She couldn’t leave, not over this.

  “You’re not trying to find Martha?”

  “I am,” he said. “But not to get her back.” He tentatively reached out and brushed her fingers with his. “I just…need to find her and get her out of whatever situation she’s in. Otherwise, that Josh character that showed up at the ranch could continue to make my life difficult.”

  Sudden worry hit Dallas again. “And yours,” he added. Perhaps it was better if she left in a rage and never spoke to him again. His heart wailed, because it had just found another rock and another hard place to exist between.

  “You didn’t come to work,” Jess said, her voice feeble.

  “Thomas wanted to stay home from school,” Dallas said. “We’re just hanging out. Ted’s here.”

  “Yeah, I saw Ted.” Jess blew out her breath and looked away. “Okay, well, as long as we’re okay.”

  “I think we’re okay,” Dallas said. “What do you think?”

  She wouldn’t meet his eye again, and Dallas finally reached up and gently guided her face back to his. “Jess?”

  “I feel like you said yesterday,” she whispered. “Disconnected.”

  “Do you have a few minutes?” he asked. “Come in and sit with me.” He watched the indecision rage across her face.

  She finally nodded, and Dallas tucked her into his side and led her back to the house. Fierce determination filled him. He was not going to let Josh or Mario take what he’d been building. Not his relationship with his children, and not this beautiful woman at his side.

  Find Martha, he thought. Get her out. Pay the debt.

  Be free.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Jess told herself not to worry about not being in the spotlight of Dallas’s life. He had a lot going on right now, and she didn’t need to be front and center. She kept her head down, and she went to work everyday.

  Dallas texted her every morning to let her know if he was going to be at work that day or not, and if he was, what they should do for lunch. She sometimes took lunch to his office, and he sometimes joined her in the West Wing.

  Those thirty minutes every day became the basis of their relationship, and as the days and weeks passed, she started to wonder if that was all she’d ever get with him.

  They hadn’t spoken about the holidays, though Jess’s mom had called and asked her to come to Montana for the Morales family celebration. With only a week to go until Christmas, Jess had to make a decision.

  She worked at the desk in the kitchen, working on the schedule for her trainers, as well as the horseback riding lessons. A new batch of kids started once the New Year did, and while Emma usually helped with this schedule, she’d been busy planning her wedding and Jess had volunteered to do it all this time.

  “Jess!”

  She turned and dropped her pencil at the sound of Remmy’s voice. A smile filled her face as well as her soul. “Hey, sweetie.”

  The little girl flew into her arms, already talking about something that had happened at school that day. “And this boy—his name is Mickey, you know like the Mouse?—and brought in a real, live rat for show-and-tell. It squeaked and everything, and it had this long, long tail. He actually held it by the tail, and we all got to touch it.”

  “That’s amazing,” Jess said, beaming at her. “Was he slimy?”

  “No,” Remmy said with a giggle. “His tail didn’t have any hair though.”

  “So it must’ve been slimy,” Jess said, still teasing Remmy.

  Remmy laughed and shook her head. “No, Jess, it was just kind of weird.”

  “I bet.”

  “You’ll come to my birthday party, right?” Remmy looked at her with all the hope and innocence of a six-year-old, and Jess’s whole heart expanded for the girl. While she hadn’t seen Dallas a ton, she had spent some more time with his kids.

  She’d taken Thomas shoe shopping when Dallas had to work a fifteen-hour day to get caught up on all the things he’d fallen behind on after taking time off.

  He hadn’t updated her about Martha for at least a week now, and she looked up to find Dallas standing there, watching her and Remmy and grinning.

  “Of course I will,” Jess said, focusing on Remmy again. “When is it?”

  “January seventh,” Remmy said. “The party is that night.”

  “At your house?”

  “Yes,” Dallas said, stepping forward. “Our place. Remmy’s favorite food is—”

  “Tacos!” the little girl shouted, and Jess flinched away from the sound. “Daddy’s ordering a lot of tacos.”

  Jess grinned too, wishing a lot of tacos would bring her the same happiness it brought Remmy. “That’s amazing,” she said. “I love tacos too.”

  “Ask her,” Dallas said, and Remmy turned to look at her father. Jess did too, noting the half-serious look on Dallas’s handsome face. Something sharp stung her, and she realized how much she missed him. Maybe she’d taken too big of a step back. Maybe she’d overestimated how overwhelmed he was.

  When Remmy turned back to Jess, she wore some of the seriousness in her gaze too. “Will you make the cake?”

  Surprise shot through Jess and lifted her eyebrows. “Your birthday cake?” She switched her gaze to Dallas as if to ask, Really?

  “Yes,” Remmy said. “Daddy says you’re good at baking.”

  Was she? Had she ever told Dallas that? She couldn’t remember. She was no whiz in the kitchen, she knew that—and Dallas did too.

  “Sure,” she said anyway. If she couldn’t do it, Emma would help her, and Emma was a genius with baked goods. In fact, Jess should jus
t ask Emma to make the cake up front.

  “Is there a theme we’re working with?” she asked.

  “Disney princess,” Dallas said. “All the little girls will be dressed up in princess dresses for the party.”

  “No boys coming?” Jess asked, smiling at Remmy.

  Remmy shook her head. “Nope. Girls only.”

  Jess tried to see the tall, broad-shouldered mechanic who wore a cowboy hat everywhere he went amidst a bunch of six-and-seven-year-old princesses, and somehow he fit right in.

  She wouldn’t, but she didn’t want to dwell on that right now. “Disney princesses,” she repeated. “Which one are you going to be?”

  “Belle,” Remmy said instantly. She played with the ends of Jess’s hair. “Her dress is yellow.”

  Jess grinned at her and pressed her forehead to Remmy’s. “Is your daddy the beast? Or Thomas?” She giggled with the girl, and Remmy felt like she fit right in Jess’s life.

  She looked up at Dallas, wondering if he did too. She couldn’t have Remmy without him, and she felt like an idiot for getting attached to the girl when her relationship status with her father was so tumultuous.

  “Okay,” Dallas said. “Rems, you have homework for tomorrow, and Jess has work to do.”

  The little girl slipped from Jess’s lap, and she stood as Remmy skipped past her dad and down the hall. She watched him watch her until the back door closed, and then he met her eye.

  “Do you have a minute?” he asked, extending his hand toward her to hold.

  Jess nodded, easily putting her hand in his. She let him lead her through the house to the rarely-used front porch. Ginger kept a bench there, and Dallas let out a long sigh as he sat down. His hand in hers never wavered, but he took several seconds to breathe before he spoke.

  “Jess, the boys and I have to go to Miami.”

  “Okay,” she said, her chest vibrating. “Why?”

  “We found Martha.” He looked at her. “She’s in a bad way, Jess, and she won’t leave on her own.”

  Everything inside Jess laced tight. “What makes you think she’ll go when you get there?”

  “She won’t,” he said. “It’s not going to be easy.”

  Worry accompanied the tension radiating through Jess. “And then what? You’re going to bring her back here?”

  “Yes,” Dallas said. “She needs to be in a drug and alcohol treatment facility, and I’m going to check her into one of those.”

  Jess nodded, because she didn’t know what else to say or do. It felt like Dallas was bringing home his mistress and expecting the three of them to live under the same roof.

  That made no sense, because it wasn’t like she and Dallas lived together. They weren’t even close to talking about something serious.

  The closest they’d come was him asking her if she’d like to get to know his kids better, and that was months ago.

  She looked at him, the storm in his soul so easy to see. “Dallas,” she said carefully. “We’re still okay, right?”

  “Of course,” he said. “Once I get through this, things will go back to normal.”

  Normal. He’d been using that word since Thanksgiving, but Jess honestly didn’t know what it meant anymore.

  “I don’t think that’s true,” Jess said slowly. “There will be a new normal, Dallas.” One with Martha in it, and part of Dallas’s attention forever on his ex-wife.

  Selfishness strung through Jess. She reminded herself that she’d made the choice to start dating Dallas and get to know his kids. She thought of Remmy and the birthday cake she’d just committed to making. She did love the little girl, and she enjoyed Thomas too. With time, she knew the boy would finally open up to her completely.

  “That’s okay,” he said. “I’ve had a lot of new normals, Jess. I’d love to have the chance to build one with you.”

  “Is that true?” she asked.

  “Of course it is.” He searched her face, trying to find something Jess hadn’t been able to discover herself. “What are you worried about?”

  She couldn’t say Martha, and it wasn’t really his ex-wife anyway. Jess felt like she’d just stepped onto a turning point, and what she said next would determine the path of their new normal.

  “I’m worried that you aren’t ready for a new normal,” she said. “Because you still have so much from your old normal to tie up. I’m not blaming you.” She spoke softly. “Our relationship is my longest, Dallas. I’m falling for you, and I’m scared that even if you could fall in love with me, that you’re simply not in a place to do it.”

  Dallas’s jaw jumped as he pressed his teeth together. “I don’t know what to say.”

  “You asked me what I was worried about. That’s what I’m worried about.” Her chest seized as she realized that her fears and concerns about their relationship were one hundred percent true. He hadn’t refuted what she’d said.

  “I think we should wait until I do tie up everything,” he said. “And then you can decide if the new normal is what you want.”

  She nodded, once again not sure what else to do. She didn’t want to break up with Dallas. He was easily the one single man she’d connected most with in her whole life. Didn’t that mean she could give him more time? More chances?

  “I hate to ask this now, but I was hoping you would come stay at my place and take care of the kids while I’m gone.”

  Jess jerked her attention back to him. “You want me to take care of your kids?”

  “Yes.” He smiled. “Remmy loves you, and you’ll be able to see if you really want to spend more time with them in the new normal.”

  “I already know the answer to that, Dallas,” she said.

  “Nate said he’d talk to Ginger, and Ted with Emma, to help you.”

  “When are you guys going?”

  Dallas didn’t answer; instead, he leaned down and kissed Jess. She was aware of the scent of him, the warmth from his body and mouth, and the instant way her heart melted into the kiss.

  “I’m going to miss you, Jess,” he whispered, lightly touching his lips to her cheek, jaw, and earlobe.

  Heat flared through her whole body, and she actually giggled as he pulled away.

  He lifted his arm around her shoulders, and she sighed as she settled into his chest. She wanted more moments, minutes, and months with Dallas Dreyer. Moments like this, where there were no white trucks to fix, no locks on doors to keep crying children safe, and no worries that every time he went home, he’d find some angry man demanding something from him.

  Jess hadn’t even realized how stressed she’d been until that weight had been removed from her shoulders. “I told you about the horse show, right?” she asked.

  “Yes,” he said, his voice low and his mouth right against her temple. “January twentieth, in San Antonio.”

  “You and the kids could come,” Jess said, though she knew he wouldn’t commit to it. He didn’t know what tomorrow would bring, or Christmas, and he couldn’t make a judgment about January twentieth.

  “I’ll look at their calendar,” he said. “Thomas has a band concert in January sometime.”

  “Okay,” she said. “You never said when you were going to Miami.”

  “Tomorrow, Jess,” he said. “We’re leaving in the morning.”

  She stayed very still for a few seconds. “You don’t give a woman much time to prepare, do you?”

  “All you need is clothes,” he said. “I’ll change the sheets for you in the morning, and you can sleep in my bed.” He kneaded her back into his chest when she started to rise. “Fair warning, though. Both kids usually end up in the bed with me.”

  “Oh, wow,” Jess said, because she hadn’t shared a bed with anyone in decades. “Do you think they’ll do that with me?”

  “I guess you’ll see,” he said, chuckling. “You can take them back to the ranch if you want. They know where their suitcases are and how to pack. School is out at noon tomorrow, and then it’s the holiday break.”

  “Ri
ght,” she said, suddenly needing to start writing down some details. “Allergies or food things I need to know?”

  “I made you a sheet,” he said. “Thomas has therapy on Monday.”

  “You won’t be back by Monday?” That was four days. What did they need to do for four days in Miami? Another dose of fear reminded Jess that she had no idea what they were getting into.

  When Dallas said, “We don’t know, Jess. I’ve told Nate and Ted that I absolutely have to be home by Christmas, so I know it won’t be longer than that.”

  “My mother asked me to come for Christmas,” Jess said. “I was going to talk to you about it.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah,” she said. “I know you can’t go, but I think I will. If you’re back.”

  “I can’t imagine we’ll even be gone until Monday, but I did make you a quick cheat sheet of Thomas’s and Remmy’s favorite places to order. I’ll leave you money for that. And there’s just the one appointment on Monday.”

  “The kids would like to go horseback riding, I bet,” Jess said.

  “Absolutely,” Dallas said. “And Thomas has been talking about a friend named Henry that you’d probably score some points with if you let him come over.”

  “Henry,” Jess said. “Got it.” They fell silent again, and Jess closed her eyes and enjoyed being with Dallas. She thought she’d like to bottle moments like these and unstop them when the hard times came, because she knew there was a dark, brewing, bubbling cloud on the horizon. She just wasn’t sure when it would burst and send down the winds and rains.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Dallas followed Ted off the plane, his backpack already hitched over his shoulders. The flight from San Antonio to Miami hadn’t taken nearly long enough, because Dallas wasn’t nearly settled enough.

  They had some idea of what they were getting into, because the Warden had been the one to identify the drug gang that Martha had gotten involved with, and he’d described them as “nasty.”

  Jesus had also provided a lot of information about Josh, who wasn’t the leader of the gang, but he was the one who did the dirty work. Dallas had thought it sure was a long drive to bring a broken down truck from the tip of Florida to the Texas Coastal Bend.