“But how do you know?”
“Because I feel it. Over these last six months, we’re talked a lot and really gotten to know one another. I think…” I take a deep breath. “I think I’m really starting to have feelings for him. And I know how crazy that sounds, but the way we talk…it’s like the way you and Blake talk. Like deep conversations, talking about our feelings and emotions and all the things we’re going to do when we finally get to meet up. He’s real. You just have to take my word for it. I know it. I know he is.” I assure her, but I’m wondering if it’s really her I’m trying to convince.
“Okay.” She nods once. “I believe you.”
“Really?”
“Not about the Memphis stuff because I saw the way you looked at him and the way he looked at you. You still love him, and I think a part of you always will no matter how much you deny it, but I believe you about Paul.” She offers one of her wide, blinding smiles that makes me laugh.
I guess a girl can only lie about so much. I used all of my convincing to get her to believe that Paul is real. I have nothing left when it comes to convincing her that I no longer have feelings for Memphis, but hey, I still need to convince myself of that one.
Pearl and I sit and finish off our beers before going our separate ways. We both walk out of the bar and stop out front for a hug.
“I’ll see you later, Jay,” she says, pulling away and rushing for her little bug.
I smile and wave, watching as she drives away. Instead of heading for the car, I walk to the post office that’s just right next door. With Mama getting older, she hasn’t been getting out as much. It’s been my weekly task to pick up her mail for her. I walk inside and over to the wall full of P.O. boxes. I dig my keys out of my purse and unlock her box before digging out the few envelopes and catalogs stuffed inside. I drop my keys back into my open purse and turn around, bumping right into Mrs. Tessle, the town busy body.
“Oh, excuse me, Mrs. Tessle. I didn’t see you there.” My hand is still covering my heart from the fright she’s given me by appearing out of nowhere as quietly as a nightmare.
She laughs it off. “I’m sorry, dear. I just thought that you’d like to know about a certain quarterback who’s back in town.”
My mouth drops open as my eyes widen with fear, excitement, worry, and anger. How dare he show his face back in my town after everything he’s done?
I wipe the look from my face and shake my head free of all the emotions overpowering it. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Tessle, but I have no idea who you’re referring to.”
She gives me a knowing smile. “I think you do, dear. I was outside watering my award-winning rose bushes just yesterday when all of a sudden, this horrible sound of a motor revving cut right through my peace and quiet time. I looked up and, sure enough, there was that old fire engine red GTO speeding down the road, just like old times.”
I nod but pressed my lips together, refusing give her a reason to spread this bit of gossip around town. “Mrs. Tessle, I really need to go now. As you know, Mama isn’t doing so good. I need to check on her.”
“Oh, alright dear.”
I start to walk away, but she calls me back.
“Jade, please, when you see Memphis, politely remind him that my road does have a speed limit, and I won’t hesitate to call the law on him next time. He’s not a child anymore. He has to follow the rules, just like everyone else around here.”
“Will do, Mrs. Tessle,” I mumble, rushing out of the post office with Mama’s mail stuffed under my arm. I nearly run away from Mrs. Tessle and her news that Memphis is back in town. Suddenly, I’m hyperaware of my surroundings. This town is small, too small for the both of us. And he could be anywhere. He could be sitting at The Place right now, watching me from the front window. I glance over my shoulder to peek into the window.
How long has he been in town? And how is it possible that I haven’t run into him yet? Normally, with something like this, I would turn to Pearl, but she’s already convinced that I’m still in love with him. Going to her with this new information would only drive the point home for her, and that’s something I can’t allow to happen. I’ve worked for years to put Memphis Styles behind me, to leave him and us in my past. I’ve worked too hard to let it all go to waste now. No, Memphis will stay right where he left me: on his doorstep, crying, not watching my every step in an attempt to avoid him.
I’m walking into Mama’s house a little while later. I place her mail on the table by the door, and she looks up from her recliner at me with a smile.
“Hey, Mom.” I flop down on the couch, directing my eyes to the TV where her favorite soap opera is playing.
“Hi, sweetheart. What have you been up to today?”
I shrug. “I went to work, then met up with Pearl for a drink. I got your mail and ran into Mrs. Tessle.”
She laughs. “And what’s the latest gossip?”
“Memphis is back in town,” I blurt out.
Her eyes stretch wide. She’s very aware of what this could do to me…if I let it. She lay by my side for months after he left, hugging me and supporting me and telling me that one day, everything would be fine. “Is she sure that she doesn’t have him confused with someone else?”
“She said she saw and heard his fire engine red GTO come barreling down the street. She even went as far as to ask me to remind him that there is a speed limit.”
She scoffs. “What an old hag! Doesn’t she remember you moping around here for months after he up and left without a word? How could she expect you to tell him that?”
“She is probably assuming that I’ve moved on like everyone else in this town, like I should have.”
Her face softens, and she places her hand on mine. “Your heart will heal when it’s supposed to, dear. There is no time limit on heartbreak. One of these days, you’ll find a man who will wipe out any memory of Memphis and replace them with new memories, better memories.”
I sure do hope so.
Four
Memphis
“Dad, can I ask you something?”
“If you hand me that crescent wrench,” he replies from under the hood of an old Chevy truck.
I hand it over and lean against the fender. “If you were me, would you go talk to Jade?”
He wheels himself out from under the truck to peer up at me. “Still have that one on the brain, do ya?”
I pop my jaw by wiggling it to the side and back. “I don’t know. I guess I do if I’m asking. Truth is,” I say, sitting down on a tire in the floor of the garage. “I guess I never moved on. When I’m gone, I can put her out of my head for a while. But when I’m here, there’s no avoiding her. All I want to do is see her, talk to her, touch her.”
“Pick things up where you left off?” he asks, sliding back under the truck.
“No. Yes. I don’t know.” I run my hand over my head, feeling my short hair springing right back into place. “I want her. I’ve always wanted her, but I hurt her, and I know that. I know she shouldn’t give me another chance, but that doesn’t stop me from thinking about it. I mean, I up and left. No note. No goodbye. No explanation. All after I took her virginity.”
I hear the tool in his hand clatter to the floor with that last part, and he comes sliding out again, frowning at me. “You what?”
I nod. “I know, I’m a dick. It’s just that, on prom night, I had it in my head that I was going to tell her that I enlisted, but I couldn’t. We were having a good time and dancing, and she was just so happy and beautiful that I didn’t want to ruin her night. Then, at the after party, I got drunk, and even though I told myself that I wouldn’t touch her, not unless she knew the truth, I couldn’t fight her off. She was dead set on losing it on prom night, and I figured I wanted her night to be special, so we had sex.”
He shakes his head and pushes himself back under the truck in an attempt to avoid me.
“So, you think she’d talk to me?”
He laughs long and hard. “Son, if I were her, I’d
talk to you long enough to just snip your you-know-what off with a pair of hedge trimmers.”
I smile and shake my head. “But seriously?”
He wheels himself out once more and sits up right to look me in the eye. “I really don’t know, son. I mean, she loved you once, she could love you again…or she might still. Fact of the matter is that you won’t know anything until you talk to her. If she smacks you across the face, you’ll deserve it, but you’ll know your answer, now won’t ya?” He gives me one of his famous long stares, which means I know the answer to my question already. “Now, let’s get back to work. I’m sure Mr. Peterson would like his truck back this week.” He lies back down and wheels himself under once more. I push myself up to my feet and grab the light, shining it right where I know he needs it.
Another week passes before I work up the courage to actually go into town, and that’s only because Dad said if I didn’t go grab us lunch, he’d kick my ass. I’m driving down main street when I notice an old blue beat-up Jeep Wrangler parked at the post office. Without thinking, I quickly swing my GTO into the open slot right next to it. I look around for her, but she’s nowhere in sight. I open my door. Placing one foot on the ground, I stand up to get a higher vantage point. That’s when I see her walking out of the building.
She hasn’t noticed me yet. She’s too busy pulling her keys out of her purse as she walks back to her Jeep. She has mail stuffed under her right arm, and her jet-black hair is in soft curls, bouncing as she walks. She makes a sharp left turn, walking between my car and her Jeep. She puts the key into the door and unlocks it.
“As I live and breathe. If it isn’t Jade Karma Seymour.” I can’t hold back a smirk.
At the sound of my voice, her back stiffens, and she slowly turns to face me. She looks me up and down slowly over the hood of my car, from the top of my chest to the top of my head. Her blue eyes take me in painstakingly slowly. Goosebumps prickle my skin. My smirk turns into a full-blown smile. Maybe this won’t be as hard as I thought it would.
She forces a smile onto her face, then slowly raises her middle finger into the air. She climbs into her Jeep without a word.
“Oh, come on, Jade.” I quick race around my car and over to hers. Her old Jeep has half doors and the windows are currently removed, so she has to listen to me no matter how badly she doesn’t want to. “How’a been?” I ask, leaning against the driver’s side door.
She presses her lips tightly together. It almost looks like she’s biting the both of them.
She doesn’t answer so I continue. “You’re looking good, Jay. You sure do know how to make a man regret his mistakes,” I say, looking over at her. Right now, there’s only one thing I regret, and it’s leaving her here alone.
She shakes her head as she reaches for the keys dangling in the ignition. She twists them, and the Jeep comes to life. She shifts into reverse, but I don’t step back or move. I want her to know I’m not going anywhere.
“You going to move, or do I have to run you over?” she finally asks, refusing to look at me again, instead keeping her eyes straight on the building in front of us.
“Only if you’ll have dinner with me.” I send her my flirtatious smirk, the one I used to get her to go out with me in the first place.
She scoffs and shakes her head. “Have it your way.” She hits the gas, and the Jeep rolls backward, the side mirror slamming into my arm—but it’s a Jeep so it just folds back. It’s enough to make me step away, though, before she runs over my foot.
“I’ll get you to talk to me again. Wait and see,” I shout as she comes to a stop and shifts into drive.
“You want me to talk to you?” she asks, sticking her head out the window. “I have a message for you.” She smiles sweetly.
I rub my hands together. Finally.
“Mrs. Tessle says if you speed down her street one more time, she’ll call the law.”
“Did she now?”
She shrugs one shoulder, her face indifferent. “You’re not above the law, Memphis, are you?”
God, the way she says my name has me ready to strip my clothes off and pull her against me.
“I guess not.” I laugh out.
She rolls her eyes at the same time she turns her head to look forward. Without another word, she hits the gas, and she’s leaving me behind.
Even though I know a part of her hates me, I know a part of her still loves me. Without that love, the hate would be gone. And she talked to me, she looked at me, she said my name. I’m not giving in until I have her back. I don’t care if I have to show up randomly at her house, if I have to follow her around town, or if I have to take Butter to the vet. She will talk to me, and I will explain. Jade and I, we started something a long time ago, and I ran off before it could be finished. I thought all these years would change something, but it hasn’t. The only thing that’s changed is how badly I want her. And that’s grown to an unexpected intensity.
I turn away and head into The Place, where I sit and have a beer while I wait for our food. During the day, it’s more of a restaurant than a bar. There are families gathered around the tables, having lunch and talking, and there are patrons seated at the bar, enjoying their liquid lunch. I left this place before I was old enough to even drink in here. Living in such a small town, a fake ID would’ve done no good when everyone knows how old you are anyway. I make a note to come back this evening and check things out and try and find some old friends to help pass the time. I’m handed a brown paper bag, and I toss a twenty on the counter before finishing off my beer and heading back to the garage.
Dad and I finish up work around five, and we both head back to the house to get cleaned up. I take a shower and pull on a pair of jeans and a fitted T-shirt. I grab my keys and head back out twenty minutes later. I’m driving down Main Street when I notice how full it is. Cars fill the small gravel parking lot of the bar and both sides of the streets. Surely, all these people aren’t at the bar, are they? I didn’t think that small building could even hold everyone.
I eventually find a place to park, and I have to walk almost a block down the road to go into the bar. The entire place is full. Every table is occupied, and a local country band plays on stage. The dance floor is packed with moving bodies, and every barstool is taken. I stand at the end and order a double Jack on the rocks. When I’m handed the drink, I slide over the money and turn my back to take the place in, looking for a friendly face. It’s busy for a Friday night, with nearly the whole town here for drinks and their famous fried chicken dinner.
I see Jade’s friend Pearl sitting at a table by the dance floor, and at her side is Blake Winthrop. I was lucky enough to play a year of football with him before he graduated from high school, and even though we’d only known one another for that one year, he was a good friend and made a lasting impression on me.
With my drink in hand, I walk over to their table.
I hold out my hand. “Hey, Blake. You remember me? We played football together my freshmen year.”
He looks up at me, and his brows pull together as he thinks. “Yeah, Memphis Styles, right?” he asks, shaking my hand.
I nod. “That’s right. How you been? I haven’t seen you since you graduated high school.”
He nods. “I’m good, man. Have a seat.” He pushes a chair in my direction.
I see the look Pearl shoots his way, but I ignore it. She must hate me because Jade hates me. But as soon as I get Jade back on my side, she’ll be on my side too.
“So, did that football career take you anywhere?” He picks up his drink, taking a sip.
I laugh and shake my head. “Nah, I enlisted in the army. Just got back home, actually.”
“Wow, that’s cool. Good for you. Not much has changed.” He just now seems to notice that something is off with Pearl. He wraps his arm around her shoulders.
“Not much has changed at all,” I agree.
“Sorry. The line to the bathroom was long,” Jade says, walking up to take her seat at the table
, but she stops short when her eyes land on mine.
I take her in. She’s fucking beautiful. Her long black hair hangs nearly to her waist, and she’s wearing a black sun dress that has little blue and white flowers printed on it. At her narrow waist is a belt, which gives her the perfect hourglass shape. My eyes drop further, taking in her long legs. The darkness of her hair and dress make her alabaster skin look much more fair. I feel my mouth start to water when I think about what’s beneath that dress and how sweet she used to taste.
“Jade,” I greet her with a nod of my head.
She looks at Pearl. “What’s he doing here?”
She shrugs and doesn’t take her eyes off of me.
Blake leans forward and looks at the three of us. “Is there something I’m missing here?”
“No,” Jade interjects.
“Jade and Memphis used to date back in high school,” Pearl says, trying to play the mediator.
Blake nods knowingly.
“It was a long time ago,” I tell him, still watching Jade. “Please, Jade, don’t let me stop you from having a good time. Sit.”
She clenches her jaw but takes her seat once again. Excitement courses through me at the idea of getting her on that dance floor, like the good old days.
“So, what happened with the two of you?” Blake asks, looking from Jade to me and back.
“He took my virginity at prom, then up and left town without so much of a goodbye.” Jade shoots me a look.
Blake’s eyes double in size as he looks at me. He shakes his head and lifts his glass. “Sorry I asked,” he mumbles, tipping it back to take a swig.
Five
Grand Lake Colorado Series: A Complete Small Town Contemporary Romance Collection Page 11