“Ah!” I squeak and then hop back into the bathroom while Des shuts the door with him on the other side. My ribs instantly protest the sudden movement, so I bend over, holding my side. “You were supposed to go downstairs!” I shout at the closed door.
Prince Alexavier’s voice is pinched through the barrier. “I told you I shouldn’t have left, so I didn’t leave. I’m not going to sit at a meeting you’re not there to weigh in on. It’s all of us or none of us.” Then there’s a muffled bit I can’t hear, followed by, “Would you put some pants on, Des? Stop strutting around, all cocky.”
I tuck the towel around my frame and do my best not to display my embarrassment as I open the door again and stride out, catching a glimpse of Des sliding on his boxer briefs. The room doesn’t tilt anymore, but Prince Alexavier fixes his hand to my elbow to make sure I don’t stumble. I don’t have it in me to jerk away from him, mainly because I’m not completely certain the room won’t slant again at any given second.
“You’re bracing yourself. What hurts?” Prince Alexavier’s hand flutters over my back and lands on my hip. The touch is so protective and gentle, I nearly lean into it.
My jaw tightens. “You’re going to leave. Just get it over with. You being here doesn’t make any sense.” This is the last thing I want to talk about right now, but it comes out of me without a filter. “It’ll be more painful if you pretend to want to be with me, and then leave again.”
Prince Alexavier stops our path toward the bed. He turns my body slowly and holds me like he knows how, which is the best and worst thing a man can do after he’s left you. “I’m not leaving.”
I wasn’t expecting him to still be here. I was purposefully harsher with him than I wanted to be because he was supposed to run away when things got difficult. “I can’t afford to trust in something that’s going to disappear.”
Prince Alexavier kisses my forehead. “If I was going to leave, it would’ve been when I had to listen to you lose your virginity to my best friend on the other side of that wall. If I was going to leave, it would’ve been when all of this grew to be bigger than I could handle. Let me stay, Lily-girl.”
When his arms tighten around my waist, there’s no lie in them. But to be safe, I press my ring to his chest. “Why are you here?” It’s not a challenge so much as a search for the truth. I need to hear nothing but total honesty, even if it hurts.
Prince Alexavier looks deep into my eyes, his stomach flush to mine. “I’m here because I love you. And I’m not leaving until you understand exactly that. All those years that were stolen from us weren’t our fault. But this small stretch was agony because I’m the one who broke it. I wasted too many days staying away from you when that was never meant to be our destiny.” My ring sinks deeper, my hand warm with a melting chocolate sensation that spreads over his chest. It’s the same feeling I get when Des promises me all the ways we’ll always have each other. There’s not a trace of coldness, no hint of a lie. “We’re supposed to stay together, even when you’re scared of yourself. Even when I’m wrong.”
“You’re telling me the truth,” I confirm aloud.
“I wouldn’t have come all this way for a lie.” He thumbs the small of my back, and my body hums in that exact spot. “One day—not today, but one day—will you forgive me for forgetting we belong together?”
I study the sincerity in his eyes, the curve of his lips, the lack of laughter in him. It’s an effort to loop my arm around his neck, but I take that leap as I grant him a small nod. His entire being exhales aloud when I lean my head on his shoulder and his arms tighten around my hips. “I’m still mad at you,” I admit, though that anger is lessened with every inhale I take from the crook of his neck.
“That’s okay. I’m mad at me, too. It’s not going to heal easy or quick, but so long as you’ll give me a chance, I’ll make sure it heals.” His lips press to my naked shoulder, and goosebumps rip across my flesh, awakening for him. He kisses my neck, stealing rough gasps from me as my knees weaken. “How angry are you right now? So livid that I shouldn’t kiss your lips?”
I don’t know how to answer that, so I dive into the deep end and kiss him.
It’s one step too far, so my knees buckle. My vision swims, and I’m so pissed at Vera for putting me in this predicament that the only thing that comes out of me is a loud curse word as Alexavier struggles to keep me upright.
Des rushes to my other side, and the two of them help me to sit on the edge of the bed.
I groan as I lean forward. “Ugh. That was supposed to be sexier than it went down. This stupid concussion.”
“Easy, then. Deep breaths.” Des sits beside me and anchors me to him until the room stops spinning. He’s dressed in only his underwear, so I get to take as much warmth from his skin as I like. He takes my hand and holds it atop his bare thigh, covering my chilly fingers with his because that’s how much Des loves me. “Close your blue eyes and give yourself a moment to catch up. Alex will still be just as dashing then, yeah?”
It takes me more than a minute to open my eyes, and when I do, I’m treated to the sight of Alexavier kneeling before me, dirtying his white outfit just to make a statement. Though my ribs still ache, my head is clearing, which is half the battle. “Sorry about that.”
Alexavier purses his lips at my apology, but doesn’t say anything. Instead he stands, tilting my chin up so he can kiss me without fear of me falling to the floor.
Our lips move slowly, letting the seduction feel like friendship for as long as it needs to. It’s us, and for all the confusion and hurt I’m still holding on to, being us is exactly what I want right now.
Though neither of us are going to kick Des out, he’s polite enough to give us our reunion. He slides on his pants and tugs a shirt over his head. “I think I’ll pop downstairs and have a look around. See if Vera’s hiding in any abandoned rooms, broom closets or dust bins.”
Alexavier freezes at my gasp and pulls back to examine my epiphany. I try to stand again, completely killing the mood. “Queen Butcher! Des, that’s where she’ll be!”
“I was joking,” Des admits, holding up his hands. “Lily, there’s no way Vera’s in the mansion still. She would have fled first thing.”
“She doesn’t want to escape.” As the words come out of me, I’m certain I’m right. “Vera attacked Queen Butcher because she was about to sign a peace treaty with Ronin.”
Des’ eyebrows shoot upward. “What? When was this?”
“Years ago. Back when Queen Butcher was awake, obviously. Vera poisoned her, but she has to keep giving Queen Butcher regular doses of bella donna because otherwise the queen might wake back up. Vera never had the courage to kill her, but now that Vera’s got nothing to lose? She’s going to finish the job.”
Des shoves on his boots and runs out of the room, while Alexavier helps me find clean-ish clothes, sighing his frustration that the most naked we’ll be getting is him watching me dress. He lets me lean on him while we make our way down the halls, toward where I’m certain Vera will return.
21
Brother Justice
Lilya
I feel more myself, now that I’m in my jeans and navy long-sleeved t-shirt with my holster strapped around my thigh. Maybe I don’t look shifter or vampire or even fae like this, but I can think clearer, understanding the next step I have to take. Queen Butcher’s room was promptly searched upon my accusation, but Vera was nowhere in sight.
That doesn’t bother me one bit. I can wait. There aren’t just guards posted at each exit, but one of us is there as well. While Salem trusts his guards, he also trusted Vera, so I put my foot down that we’re hedging our bets. There are soldiers scouring the area for her, but so far, no one’s seen a hair on her gray head.
They told me to wait in Des’ bedroom so I’m safe, but I’m unused to the high premium they place on my life. I tried. I really did. I stayed for ten minutes before I got the itch to move. I’m not accustomed to waiting around while someone I love might
be in danger. In this case, it’s many someones, plus Salem’s mother, who deserves more protection than guards at the exits.
I do what I can to move quietly. I don’t want another lecture from Ronin about what it means to be a ruler. Letting other people do the heavy lifting when there’s work to be done doesn’t feel like ruling to me. It feels like being a sitting duck while the world burns around me. I don’t have much tolerance for that. Ronin’s anxious to get Des and me to sit down with him for some big talk, but there are more important things at hand. Des is positioned near the east exit, which is about halfway between the room I’m supposed to be in upstairs, and Queen Butcher’s resting room. My footsteps are light and soundless as I move down hallways, holding my breath and leaning on walls when I get dizzy. I nearly collapse twice, but manage to let myself into her room with a giant gust of relief.
“Ah!” I shout, breaking my silence when giant hands fly towards me, and a body pins me to the wall in the dark. Judging by the bulk that’s squishing the air from my lungs and jolting my aching ribs, it’s definitely not Vera.
“Lily? What are ye doing here?” Justice’s breath is hot in my face.
“Getting mauled by a prince who’s supposed to be on bedrest, apparently.”
Justice releases me and brushes his hands down my sides, straightening my shirt with an apologetic dip to his head that I can only just make out in the dark. His voice lowers to a terse whisper. “You’re supposed to be upstairs, wee lass.”
“You’re supposed to be resting. You were attacked and then you passed out, if you recall.”
“Aye, well, when Destino told me about your theory about where Vera’s most likely to be, I decided to make my way over here. Seemed like as good a place as any to recover.”
“What’s her animal? I’m on edge because I’m not sure what kind of attack I’m in for if she shifts.”
“Vera’s a harmless calico cat. Nothing like the lebnest monster.”
“The what?”
Justice waves his hand. “Mostly a myth. A huge, scaly olive-tinted monster tha breathes fire. I don’t think it exists, but a few in Jacoba swear they’ve seen it in action. The most Vera will do is give ye a kitten’s scratch.”
“Whew. That’s a relief. Yikes on the lebnest monster, though.”
He scratches the back of his head. “Destino was tight-lipped about how exactly we escaped the storm cellar. Said ye know more about tha than anyone else, so I should ask ye.”
Great. Part of me wants to tell Justice to shove off and just be grateful he’s alive. Looking too closely at the details of how it all went down won’t do me a lick of good. But, as I’m living under his roof and all, I dig deep for what bravery I have left. The story comes out in choppy whispers as we sink to the stone floor to settle in for the wait, but it comes, hanging between us in the dank air that desperately needs to be vented. I want to open the window so the residual stink of sandalwood and my sins drifts away, reducing to particles of pain that no one can touch.
We sit together on the hard floor, our backs chilled against the stone wall and our knees bunched up on the other side of Queen Butcher’s bed. If the door opens, we won’t be immediately visible. With each segment of my story, I expect Justice to get up and leave, to cuss me out, to forbid me going near his brother.
But he stays. Justice doesn’t leave me, and I’m not completely sure why. As I near the end, confessing how I poisoned Vera, and by default, him and Salem, I prepare myself for his wrath, hugging my knees to my chest as tightly as my bruised ribs will allow.
Instead of all the things I fear, Justice curves his arm around my back when the stone support coaxes a shiver from me. Then he reaches over and tugs a blanket down from the shelf beneath the nightstand. I’m flummoxed when he drapes the heavy brown material over my legs. “What are you doing?”
“You’re cold.”
“Yeah, but why are you being nice to me?”
Justice chuckles airily, the sound of it staying between us. “What idiot wouldn’t be nice to the person who saved them? Vera would’ve killed me if ye hadn’t done what ye did.”
My nose scrunches as confusion purses my lips. “I’m dangerous. I can snap my fingers and produce a poison so deadly, it can burn through flesh.”
“Ye may be afraid of yourself, but today I draw breath because of ye. I’ll not waste what life you’ve granted me being afraid of a good thing. Neither should ye.”
His words hit me like the slap across the face I needed. Perhaps Fiora was right all those years she told me “magic is what ye make of it.” I didn’t understand what she meant, or maybe I didn’t believe it. But Justice telling me that I’m his good thing gives me faith that maybe I won’t be a curse to the world because of who I am.
Justice’s arm around my back pulls me closer, until my temple is resting on his meaty shoulder. He trusts in the good parts of me enough to let me near him, so I resolve to always be the thing that saves him, that helps him, that is good for him and his territory. “I won’t hurt you,” I promise us both.
“I know tha. But I need your word tha ye won’t harm Salem or his girlfriend once he comes clean to ye.”
All my elation crashes at mention of the thing I’ve been trying to push out of my mind. “Of course not. I’ll do what I have to so the territories are united. This was never about feelings. It was about the people. The future. That hasn’t changed.”
There’s only a beat of silence before Justice’s hand moves up and down over my bicep to soothe my palpable ache. “I’ve seen the way ye look at my brother. It’s about feelings, too.”
I don’t want to need comfort, but the cold is sinking in deep, penetrating my bones in a way that makes me wonder if I’ll ever feel warmth again. “It’s okay that we’ll have a marriage of necessity. That’s how Des and I started out. There are worse things.”
Justice sighs heavily. “You’re breaking my heart with this, wee bunneh.” He goes quiet but his thoughts are loud, creating a sense in me that he’s struggling with something.
“What’s on your mind?”
With his free hand, he rubs his jaw without looking at me. “I wasn’t on the same page as the four of ye with this plan of uniting the territories. I’m not against it; I just didn’t think it was possible. I’ve been coming around on it, and I agree tha this is the way it should be.” His chin lowers, and the next words that come out of his mouth are meant just for us. “If Salem won’t marry ye, I will.”
I can’t help the gasp that flings out from my lips. “What?”
He backpedals a little, but holds his ground. “For political reasons, of course. I wouldn’t trouble ye for intimate things. I think you’re right about the world needing to change, and tha the leaders need to drive the change, rather than always reacting to the chaos. If Salem wants to be with his girlfriend, I wouldn’t doom either of ye to suffer tha. You’ve sacrificed too much already. I’ll marry ye, and the territories will have one queen.”
My heart thuds in an unnatural rhythm. “You would do that for your territory?”
“No,” he admits, rubbing the nape of his neck as he looks anywhere but at me. “I’d do tha for Salem. If he wants to be with another lass but feels this strongly about unity, I can’t allow him to sacrifice himself like tha. People think I’m in charge because I’m set as next to rule, but Salem’s the one who makes sure the territory stays in line. He’s sacrificed enough. I can do this for my brother.”
I slump forward, cradling my face in my hands. I don’t want the prospect of marrying me to be something a person has to endure to take one for the team. I know that’s not the main point, but as honorable as Justice’s motivations are, I can’t help but wallow in a sea of sadness.
Salem has a girlfriend he’s loved for years. I don’t understand any of it. Our kiss felt so real. “The way he looked at me…” I begin, but then stop short to keep my lower lip from quivering. Then I clear my throat. “I really thought Salem wanted to be with me, even if it had
nothing to do with our master plan. I don’t know how I got it all so wrong. Maybe he kissed me so well because of the thrill of cheating on his girlfriend.”
We’re mated. Justice still doesn’t know. I’m not sure how to undo that, or how nature could’ve gotten this so very wrong. Salem shouldn’t have been able to mate with me in the first place, being that we’re of two different species. We’ll find a way to undo it, I’m sure, and then Salem can kiss his girlfriend with passion that makes her toes curl.
The thought of it breaks my heart.
Justice kisses the top of my head, cradling my creeping depression on his firm shoulder. I can’t see him as anything other than a friend or a brother, but I suppose that will have to be enough. It’s not about us; it’s about territories that need each other. The shifters need water or they will die off. I can marry someone I respect but don’t love if it’ll get an entire people fresh water.
“It’s alright, bunneh. Let’s tackle one mountain at a time.”
I don’t have a plan for any of it, so I nod, letting the silence sit atop the blanket we share.
When the door creaks open however long later, Justice and I still, not daring to breathe as the swish of a skirt sweeps the floor. It’s hard to see, but I feel the air stirring in menacing ways. Justice reaches for his knife, but Salem’s edict that wrongdoers should be punished and not murdered sits in the front of my mind. Justice needs to stay innocent. He’s in charge of an entire territory. He can’t have blood on his hands.
My hands are plenty bloody, and ready for the challenge of defending the throne of Jacoba.
22
The Wickedness in Me
Lilya
I don’t wait for Vera to approach the queen or peer over the bed to glimpse our motionless lumpy shapes in the dark. The blanket slides off my lap as I ready to pounce, but before I make my move, Justice leaps to his feet. He darts around the foot of the bed to throw his body in front of the door, trapping Vera inside with us as he grips his knife.
Malicious Prince: A Reverse Harem Romance (Territorial Mates Book 3) Page 13