Metal Mage 12

by Eric Vall

  “Hi, Mom,” Haragh mumbled.

  “I’m Chonna, Warlord of the Children of Siraos,” the woman told me as her hand slid higher on my leg. “But you can call me Mistress if you like. All my pets do.”

  “Uhhh … ” I replied shakily.

  Then Chonna smiled, and when I saw her teeth were filed into points like a piranha, my libido crashed and burned.

  Luckily, Haragh cleared his throat as loudly as possible. “We come here under the order of King Temin to deliver--”

  “Your little magic men,” Chonna finished for him. “Please tell me this is one of them. He looks delicious.”

  “No, this is Defender Flynt,” Haragh said in a coarse tone. “He’s my best friend, and he’s spoken for, so--”

  “Spoken for?” the warlord asked, and she spared half a glance at the women behind me. “Not by these small pets, surely?”

  “They’re not pets,” Haragh growled, “and would ye’ stop touchin’ him like that?”

  Chonna arched a brow. “Is that any way to speak to your life giver, Haragh?”

  The hair on my arms stood on end from the sharpness of her tone, and my horse didn’t seem to like it either, because he whipped his head back to snap at the warlord’s arm.

  Then everything happened all at once.

  Chonna made a sound like an alligator that sent her three tethered men to their knees, and they bowed with their foreheads in the dirt as they began chanting in unison. My horse whinnied in shock when the warlord’s hand locked on his muzzle next, and as she parted her jagged teeth, I realized this bitch was about to eat my fucking horse.

  “What the--”

  “Mom!” Haragh barked. “Drop it!”

  Chonna froze at the horse’s neck, and I held my breath while the warlord kept her eyes on the stallion’s. I could feel him trembling under me from fear while the men in the dirt chanted louder, but then the warlord slid her tongue across her pointed teeth as she inched closer.

  “Be careful who you bite around here,” Chonna warned the beast. “The Children of Siraos bite back.”

  Then Haragh’s mom released the horse, yanked on her rope, and brought her tethered men back to their feet. They all kissed the bloody tip of her spear before they arranged themselves around her, and Chonna let out a low growl of approval while she began petting one of the human skulls on her shoulders. When her eyes met mine, she told the skull it was a good boy, and the jagged smile she sent me made the horse back away.

  “Haragh … ” I muttered under my breath.

  “I’ve got this,” he said with an apologetic nod. “Mom, we only came to be sure you understand the terms we’re leavin’ our troops here with.”

  “No biting, I presume?” Chonna sighed.

  “No biting the Defenders, no feedin’ them your victims, no makin’ them your pets, and no sacrifices of any kind,” Haragh informed her. “That includes severed limbs. Any violence against these mages will void all agreements between you and the crown, and every Zaelik in Fraling will be sentenced to death, starting with you. Understood?”

  The warlord smirked. “How is your father?”

  “Dead,” Haragh growled. “Do you understand the terms?”

  “Tell him I said hello,” Chonna chuckled. “I’m ashamed to admit I miss the oaf. Well … parts of him.”

  My brow furrowed so hard, I thought it’d never recover, but then Chonna winked at me, and I knew it wouldn’t.

  “We’ll be on our way,” I decided.

  “So soon?” the warlord murmured. “Didn’t your life giver teach you it’s disrespectful not to feast with the Children of Siraos? Those who do not risk the wrath of the almighty God of War.”

  Haragh gave an irritated sigh. “He doesn’t want to feast with you, Mom.”

  Then the half-ogre steered his mount right between Chonna and me, and he jerked his head in the direction of the train.

  No one had to tell me twice.

  I herded my women’s mounts in the opposite direction without another word, but all things considered, I still had to force myself not to take a last look at Haragh’s mom. I’d probably have that woman’s body etched in my mind for the rest of my life, but it already felt like a dream to me.

  Just a chiseled, eight-foot tall, busty, and cannibalistic dream.

  “Sorry about her,” Haragh muttered.

  “It’s not a big deal,” I said with no conviction. “Everyone’s got odd family members.”

  Haragh snorted. “Any of yours eat human meat every five days to symbolize the glory of perpetual bloodshed?”

  “No, and what the fuck?” I groaned. “Your mom wears human skulls. Your mom has leather-clad sex boys on a rope! They kissed the bloody spear … you saw that, too, right?”

  “Yeah, I saw,” Haragh mumbled toward the ground. “If it’s any consolation, they like doin’ that. Trust me. They’ve told me at length. I didn’t even ask to hear about it.”

  “Remind me to give you a hug,” I told the half-ogre. “I think we both need it after that.”

  Haragh smirked as we passed the creepy sacrificial statue, and the little boy near the corpses waved goodbye with a jagged-toothed smile.

  “Well, I like her,” Aurora chuckled. “She bites back. Literally. I mean, who does that?”

  “Haragh, your mother is the most intimidating woman I’ve ever met,” Cayla informed the man. “Nulena’s intimidating in a good way, but Chonna made me sweat. Me! I don’t sweat, but that woman made me sweat.”

  “She called us pets,” Shoshanne mused, “and I felt like I should say something, but at the same time, I also felt like … if she says I’m a pet, I’m a pet. Does that make sense?”

  “Yes,” I muttered with genuine shame. “I got the same vibe when she said it to me.”

  “You know who would like her?” Deya giggled. “My brother. She is exactly the sort of girl Dragir would--”

  “Alright, back to the train!” Haragh suddenly barked, and my women jumped before they kicked their horses into a gallop.

  I kept my stallion reined in, though, as I turned to Haragh.

  “I don’t know if I’m comfortable leaving the Defenders here,” I told him. “These are decent mages with bright futures, and they shouldn’t have to live in fear of being cannibalized or sacrificed or whatever. The locals seem nice enough, but what if your mom puts our mages in loincloths? What if she makes them kiss the bloody spear? That’s not something a head of the Order should shrug off.”

  “They’ll be okay,” Haragh assured me. “Remember, it’s either we leave the Defenders to do their jobs, or you get to fight my mom off with the Master’s rune on her.”

  I stared at the trees for a solid minute while I carefully weighed the options, and I couldn’t believe the latter turned me on a little, but Haragh had a good point.

  “Okay,” I mumbled, “but we’re keeping a constant line of communication with this crew. I mean it. If your mom pulls even one crazy move, I’m bringing my mages back to Falmount, and the Master can have these lunatics.”

  “Fair enough,” Haragh agreed. “So … can we not tell anyone about this? I don’t need everyone in the Order knowin’ what I come from.”

  I held out my hand to shake on it. “I’ll take it to my grave.”

  The two of us stopped by the stables to make sure the Defenders were all set, and even though they looked nervous, they seemed dedicated to their new post. I shared my honest opinion on the matter so they’d know I wasn’t taking this lightly, and the leading general agreed to send regular updates regardless of whether attacks occurred here or not. Then I double checked their ammunition supply, and after quietly telling the general he had my permission to kill any of the Zaeliks if they started lurking around the huts, I followed Haragh into the pines.

  It only took us about ten minutes to gallop back to the train, and the Defenders holstered their weapons when they saw us coming through the clearing. My women were waiting beside our car while they gossiped about Chonna, a
nd as Haragh and I dismounted, they came running over with bright eyes and eager smiles.

  “When are you going to introduce Taru to your mom?” Deya asked as we handed our horses off to the Defenders. “We were thinking how well they might get along, since they both have a killing streak.”

  “Fuck that,” Haragh and I said in unison, but I barreled on without thinking.

  “The last thing Taru needs is a woman like Chonna in her life,” I scoffed. “Taru is nothing like her. She’s a genuinely amazing creature, and I don’t even wanna imagine what Chonna would have to say about their baby. She’d probably enlist the poor thing and mold it into some creepy, warlord worshipping little minion. Taru’s too pure to even risk the two of them--”

  I cut myself off when I realized Haragh was giving me the same furrowed look, and I blushed on the spot as I looked down at my boots. Then my women swiftly retreated, and I was left with Haragh’s eyes burning a hole through the side of my head.

  So, I cleared my throat and did my best to hold his gaze.

  “It was just a vase,” I blurted out of desperation. “Seriously, man, I don’t know what this is. I really don’t. I just … ”

  Haragh crossed his arms. “Go on. Ye’ just what?”

  “Just … have no idea what’s happening,” I admitted. “I don’t want your woman. You know that, right? I’m not an asshole. I don’t go after other guys’ women. I would never do that, and I’m not doing that. I just want her to be happy, and I think she’s so sweet and cute and deserves everything, and I kind of want to protect her in any way I can, but not in a weird way?”

  I winced while I waited for Haragh to either respond or deck me, but after a long moment, he smirked.

  “Okay,” the half-ogre replied.

  “Okay?”

  “Yeah.” Haragh shrugged. “I get it.”

  “Do you?” I asked in complete confusion. “Because I don’t.”

  “Yeah, I got that, too,” Haragh chuckled. “Don’t worry about it, though. I know you’re not goin’ after Taru. It’s the same with me and that healer of yours. I’d do anything for her. She’s such an angel, ye’ know? I bring her all sorts of things just because I figure she might need them. On occasion, I go out of my way to help her out.”

  “You bring Shoshanne things?” I asked, and now I was the one with the skeptical looks.

  “Sure,” Haragh admitted. “Nothin’ fancy. For example, I noticed she was having trouble keeping her hair back when ye’ had her peelin’ the skin off those runed mages, so I brought her some pins to hold it up. Another time, a few mages were trailin’ after her when she was leaving the training field late at night, and I threatened their lives to make sure they wouldn’t be givin’ her any trouble. That kinda thing.”

  “Oh.” I nodded. “That’s cool. I don’t mind that at all.”

  “I know,” the half-ogre chuckled. “Life’s just like that sometimes. Ye’ meet a person, and they become like a sister to you.”

  My eyes widened. “Exactly! That’s what it’s like?”

  “Gods, ye’ really are confused,” Haragh sighed. “Yes, that’s what it’s like having a sister.”

  “Damn,” I said as a grin spread across my face. “So … Taru’s like my big ogre sister!”

  “Little ogre sister,” Haragh corrected. “She’s only twenty-one.”

  “Seriously? She’s killed a lot of shit for only being twenty-one.”

  “I know, she’s somethin’ else,” the half-ogre chuckled, “but the point is, I appreciate the gesture. It means a lot to me that you’re so accepting of her, and having someone else around who would kill a bastard to keep her safe is fine by me.”

  “I am so relieved to hear it,” I laughed. “I thought I’d lost my mind when I made that vase. I couldn’t help it, though. She’s pregnant. What pregnant woman doesn’t want some flowers around?”

  “Shit, pregnant women love flowers,” Haragh snorted. “I can’t believe ye’ beat me to it.”

  “What are brothers for?” I sighed, and Haragh rolled his eyes at my huge grin.

  “That’s an important point, though,” the half-ogre informed me while we headed toward my sleeping quarters. “If Taru’s like a sister to ye’, and I’m like a brother to ye’, then my mother’s basically related to ye’, which means you keep your damn eyes to yourself around her.”

  I hopped into the car to dig through our many bushels of flowers while I considered this, but I could only offer half a shrug on the topic as I handed Haragh a bouquet of roses.

  “Dude, I’m not gonna lie, I am conflicted about your mom,” I admitted. “She’s bat shit crazy, but … ”

  “No,” Haragh countered. “Don’t finish that sentence. Don’t even think the rest of that sentence. No buts. She’s bat shit crazy. Full stop.”

  I nodded as the half-ogre headed down the tracks to his own car, and I sent my metal magic to unseal the door of his sleeping quarters for him. Then Bagneera took us onward to leave Fraling and the Zaeliks behind, and I spent a good ten minutes talking about Haragh’s mom’s tits with my women.

  In the end, we collectively agreed we hadn’t imagined it, they really were that big, and all five of us might let her kill us so we could see them bearing down on us just once in this life.

  Then I delivered an embarrassing monologue about how I’d never had a sister before and was super excited to find out I accidentally got one, but my women were just as excited as I was. None of us had sisters, so it turned out this was a big deal for all of us, and the women decided the next time we battled, they wanted to team up with Taru and try to make “sister slaughter time” a thing.

  I was just relieved I hadn’t somehow crossed another invisible line, though, and knowing Haragh was a stand-up guy even if I was being a clueless dope was reassuring, too. I had some awesome friends in this realm, and he was right when he said life’s just like that. Sometimes, you meet someone, and they become your ogre family.

  Other times, you meet someone’s mom, and even though she’s a cannibal, that fact is somehow less important than her tits.

  Who knew?

  So, we all learned a lot about our friends and ourselves in Fraling, and we decided to keep the lessons going on our way to Rainard. Shoshanne was determined to try every exercise in the books she’d brought along if that’s what it took to make a cyclone like Aloshi, and Aurora chose to practice sending her magic outside herself.

  I worked on locating their magery through the steel of the train car, but this was coming so much easier to me now that I focused more on the nature of their powers. I tried to sense the flux in their magic as it came and went, and after a while, I thought I could almost recognize the difference between their elements. This was the more challenging task of the two, but I stayed the course until I felt like I’d made enough headway to jump back into it easier next time.

  Then Deya began transmuting, and I got an idea.

  Her scales were engraved with a rune, and if this rune was enabling her to transmute, then why shouldn’t I be able to try and sense the rune magic involved through my magery as well?

  My heart fluttered at the notion, and I couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought of trying this sooner. It was the perfect way to test my theory on whether the two forms of magic could interact, but only a moment after I closed my eyes to try it out, Cayla grabbed my arm.

  The princess had been working on altering one of her new fur shawls to make a dragon nest for Solana, but when I looked over at her, she’d dropped the shawl and was staring out the window.

  “What’s up?” I chuckled.

  “Mason … you should be an earl,” Cayla decided.

  I felt the train beginning to slow as the words left her mouth, and I leaned over the princess to see what she was on about.

  Then I just burst out laughing as I got my first glimpse of Rainard.

  “Pindor, you son of a bitch,” I chuckled.

  Chapter 16

  The sun was sinking down toward th
e horizon as Bagneera came to a stop at the Rainard station, and my women and I headed out onto the platform to stare some more. I didn’t know if it was the golden hour glow, but everything about Lord Allen’s estate seemed to have an ethereal quality to it, and part of this had to be all the copper roofing.

  The main house was impressively huge without being ostentatious, and it sat at the center of ten other buildings with equally well-wrought roofs. Stately white columns lined the entrance side of each building like old plantation houses, and brick paths bordered with hedgerows ran between them all. Rugged evergreens that must have been over a hundred years old dotted the grounds, and in the middle of the estate, three quaint ponds with fountains were surrounded by lush green grass.

  All of Lord Allen’s extensive property was nestled between rolling hills, so I couldn’t see a village anywhere, but based on the many different crops the earl had in his fields, I guessed he’d elected to have the train run through his yard for convenience. We’d passed his personal trainyard on our way in, so I already knew he’d purchased his own shipping containers, and from where I stood, Lord Allen’s estate looked like a well-oiled operation.

  Everything from his grain mill to his smokehouse was in working order, while over a hundred field hands tended the crops, and dozens of stable boys hauled hay or shoed horses as the earl’s blacksmiths hammered away in the distance. Even with all this taking place, the whole arrangement was pristine to a respectable degree, and I envied Lord Allen as I imagined maintaining a place like this.

  There was plenty of honest work to be done here for a man who didn’t mind putting in the time, and when I took a deep breath, the scent of freshly cut grass mingled with charcoal to solidify my resolve.

  “I could be an earl,” I decided, and Cayla looped her arm in mine.

  “I agree,” the princess purred.

  “Can you hear the river?” Shoshanne sighed.

  I nodded, and while golden sunlight washed over the copper spires, my women and I stood for several minutes and listened to the rushing water of the Asris River in the canal on the other side of the tracks.

  The Defenders had all stopped to stare as well, and I had a feeling they were looking forward to being stationed here for the foreseeable future. They’d certainly have it better than the mages in Fraling would, but Rainard spanned eight and a half miles around, so the pristine setup still came with a heavy workload.