I'm Pretty Sure You're Gonna Miss Me Ronin McKinsey

by M. J. Padgett

  “And this delightful pain in my butt is my sister, Rebecca,” Daniel said, digging into a bag of potato chips.

  “It’s Becca, and you are?” She offered her hand. She stared past me and steadied herself with the counter.

  “Uh... I’m Hazel. Hazel Simmons.” I took her hand, and she shook it once, then released it. “It’s so nice to meet you.”

  “Polite,” Becca said, then she did the strangest thing. Her hands roamed my face, squishing my nose and poking at my eyes. She brushed her fingers over my lips and ended with her hands cupping my ears. “And really beautiful. Seriously, your face is super symmetrical. What color is your hair? It looks like a blob to me.”

  “It’s brown, Becca. Can you stop before Hazel runs away screaming?” Daniel said, pulling me away and toward the stairs. “My sister is losing her vision. She has a degenerative disease that started affecting it about a year ago,” he said, then yelled down the stairs. “Which is why she can’t see when she’s annoying the snot out of me!”

  “I’m blind, Daniel, not deaf!” she yelled back. “I know I annoy you! I’m homeschooled. What else is there to do?”

  He rolled his eyes and continued to drag me up the stairs toward his bedroom. At the end of the hall, he entered a room and flipped the switch. It was larger than mine, sparsely furnished, but it was neat and organized. So neat, it made me feel like my room was dirty, and I dusted it daily.

  He flopped in a bean bag chair and pointed to the bed. “Take the bed. It’s more comfortable.”

  I glanced at the bed, decided that was way too comfortable for a first meeting, sat on the floor across from him, cross-legged, and pulled out our French textbook. “I’m good on the floor, thanks. What part of the French work did you need help with?”

  “All of it, starting with Bonjour,” he said, offering me the chips.

  “You mean to tell me you don’t know any of it? It’s been seven months, Daniel!” The fact that he didn’t even know what hello was after seven months of class baffled me. “Are you even passing the class?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe?” He wiped his fingers on his pants and tossed the empty bag into the wastebasket.

  “Daniel!”

  “What?” he asked, mouth full of chips.

  “How can you care so little about passing classes? It’s our senior year! Don’t you care about college?” I asked, a little too excitedly.

  “Of course not, he’s already gotten into—”

  “Becca! Go away!” Daniel shouted at his poor sister, who happened to walk by and interjected her thoughts. She looked so sad, I felt awful for her.

  “Daniel, be nice to your sister.”

  “Yes, mother,” he said sarcastically, then said, “Becca, go away, please.”

  Becca sighed and wandered away. Daniel stood from the bean bag chair and slammed his door closed. “I swear, I can’t get one second of peace around here. And to answer your question, yes, I care, just not about French.”

  “Well, you still need to pass it, so you better start caring,” I said and flipped back to the beginning of the book.

  A door slammed downstairs, and voices drifted up to the bedroom. The house was large and an acoustic nightmare, which was why we heard every word of Becca’s conversation with her friend, complete with the details of her new favorite lipstick color.

  “This isn’t gonna work,” Daniel said, frustrated that we hadn’t even made it past the first chapter in an hour, let alone discussed our plan to get him a date to prom and get Ronin back for me. “We need to find another place to hang out.”

  “We could go to my house, but Rose and Dizzy would probably drive you crazy, too,” I said, realizing I hadn’t bothered to tell either of them where I was or what I was doing. “I should probably call them.”

  “Call when we get there,” he said, grabbing my hand and leading me out the door.

  “My things,” I said, trying to turn back as he dragged me through the house.

  “I’m bored with French. We’ll get them on the way back to your house. For now, we’re going to find a better place to plot our revenge... I mean, whatever, you know what I mean.”

  “Not on that bike, we’re not,” I said, holding firm at the garage door.

  “Chill, Peaches. We’re taking my mom’s car.” He dangled the keys in front of me, and for some reason, I agreed. It was a little crazy, the idea of running around town with a boy I didn’t really know, but Daniel was fun. He was a kind of fun I’d never experienced—carefree and happy-go-lucky.

  “Fine, let’s go.” I climbed into the car, glad to have a roof and four sides on my transportation this go around. “Where are we going?”

  “Not sure yet. We need to find a hangout where we can scheme and plot like devious little cheerleaders... I mean, devious little... Let’s just find a place.”

  “Devious little cheerleaders?” I asked.

  He shrugged. “Yeah, I said it. Sorry. But you have to admit—”

  “Don’t finish that sentence, or I will strangle you with my pompoms,” I said.

  His laugh was infectious, and I found myself wondering why he had trouble finding a date to prom at all. Surely, there was a girl in our school who was interested in him, I just had to find her—and fast.

  Daniel parked downtown, dangerously close to a place I had no desire to see, let alone hang out inside. I hated it, but I doubted I’d ever walk into Fire and Ice again, not without Ronin beside me. I sighed and got out of the car and walked with Daniel, a pleasant stroll down the block—one I hoped would lead away from all those memories shared with Ronin.

  “Where are we going?” I asked.

  “You ask a lot of questions,” he said. He glanced up and down the sidewalk, then turned left. “And I don’t know. Let’s just walk with no destination in mind and see where life takes us, Hazel.”

  Life had been beating me for two days, so I was less inclined to trust her opinion on where I should go. Nonetheless, I walked with him down the street to the row of shops I’d passed dozens of times on my way to get cake and ice cream.

  When he approached Fire and Ice, I slowed. Surely, he wouldn’t pick the one place in the entire town, I didn’t want to go. Didn’t he hear about the debacle with the ice cream cake? Daniel reached for the door, the familiar ding of the bell tingling in my ears.

  “I can’t eat here,” I said, backing a few steps away.

  “You can’t, or you won’t? Like you physically can’t chew food here, or you’d rather eat dirt?” he asked, still holding the door.

  I looked through the window, the corner booth taunting me. I wanted to puke. “Both, I think.”

  “Okay, why is that?” he asked.

  Maybe he hadn’t heard? Perhaps my humiliation was only known to the popular crowd who couldn’t seem to stop talking about it. Or maybe, the more likely answer, Daniel simply did not listen to gossip.

  “I just can’t.”

  “But why? It’s cake and ice cream. Cake, Hazel... and ice cream. Cake and ice cream. Together. In a bowl. A bowl full of yummy in the tummy happiness.” He pointed at the shop and stared blankly at me, non-responsive as I watched people coming and going. How many times had Ronin and I kissed and cuddled in the corner booth?

  “Cake and ice cream.” Daniel flapped his hand in front of my face, jerking me back to reality.

  “Because Ronin always brought me here after a game. It was our thing for over a year,” I said, biting back the tears. He let the door close and dropped his hands to his sides.

  “Oh,” he whispered. “Um... maybe...” He glanced over his shoulder, then took a single step backward. He pulled open the glass door to the shop beside Fire and Ice, then motioned for me to enter.

  “This is a dry cleaner, Daniel.”

  “Dry cleaning. It’ll be our thing.” He motioned for me to enter again as a blast of heat rushed from the little shop and flirted with my hair. It was already hot enough, so dry cleaners were a no go. And who hung out in the lobby o
f a dry cleaner anyway?

  “No,” I said and shook my head.

  “Fine.” Daniel let the door shut and took several more steps backward, tugging at my shirt to pull me along with him. He opened the next door and motioned for me to enter.

  “This is a flower shop, Daniel.”

  “Yeah. Flowers, our new thing.”

  I rolled my eyes and sighed, wondering how long this would go on, then shook my head.

  “No? Geez, woman. You’re hard to please.” He took two more steps back and opened the last door on the block.

  “This is a bookstore,” I said.

  He arched his eyebrows, and I nodded. It couldn’t hurt to see what was inside. Besides, it had a little café, and I needed coffee. Copious amounts of coffee—enough to put me on a caffeine high so far up, I’d have too many tremors to worry about Ronin and Sara.

  “Bookstore, it is then.” Daniel ushered me in and opened his arms wide in the lobby, circled around, and shouted, “Welcome to your new thing Hazel Simmons. Books and that old sleeping guy over there.”

  He gained the attention of the woman at the check-out counter. She smiled a friendly hello and stuck her nose back in her book. I turned my head in the direction of Daniel’s pointing finger and chuckled. “That’s a giant stuffed bear in the kiddie corner, not an old man, Daniel.”

  He squinted. “Huh. So it is. Anyway, this here, this is us, Hazel. It’s the Hazel and Daniel thing. Our hang out, our chill space, our hijinks headquarters, the—”

  “Okay, I get it. What’s your point?” I asked.

  “The point is, you can do stuff without Ronin What’s His Name.”

  “McKinsey, and I don’t want to do things without him,” I whined. “I don’t like doing things without Ronin.”

  “I don’t like the dentist, but I go because I’m a big boy, and I have to.” I followed him toward the back of the store, row after row of books, many untouched and dusty.

  “How is that anything like me not having a boyfriend to do things with?” I asked, leaning against the wall beside the shelf Daniel had stopped to peruse.

  “I dunno. Maybe cuz my dentist sucks, just like your ex-boyfriend,” he said matter-of-factly.

  “That’s not nice. You don’t even know him.”

  “I know he’s stupid.” He looked over the shelf, up and down, seemingly searching for something.

  “He’s a straight-A student, Daniel. He’s not stupid.”

  “I beg to differ. Differ has officially been begged.” Daniel ran his fingers over a dusty shelf of mystery novels, then pulled one from the shelf and began flipping through it.

  “Has anyone ever told you you’re sort of an odd duck?” I asked, meaning no harm. I wondered if he’d always been that way, or if it was for my benefit—his way of cheering me up and making me laugh by acting ridiculous.

  He kept his eyes in the book. “Has anyone ever told you you’re sort of... of... Anyway, Ronin is stupid.”

  “Okay. Tell me, why is Ronin stupid?”

  Daniel slid the book back onto the shelf with painstaking slowness and lowered his gaze to meet mine. His hazel eyes shifted from one of curiosity and happiness to that of sorrow. “Because he broke your heart.”

  He pulled me closer and lifted me to his lips in one swift motion. His mouth settled onto mine haphazardly, but he found his place quickly and moved his lips slowly and purposefully. I melted again, goo in his arms, but unable to stop my thoughts from invading the wonderful feeling that spread over me.

  What’s happening? Why is he kissing me? Should I stop him? Do I want to stop him? Of course, I do. I love Ronin. Who’s Ronin?

  Daniel pulled back and looked toward the door just as it slammed shut. I peered through hazy eyes out the long window across the front of the shop, catching a glimpse of the boy I was desperate to get back at all cost. Ronin had seen everything. He was angry and stormed down the street like a child who didn’t get his way.

  Daniel smiled, his mission accomplished. “Jealous, jealous,” he said.

  Daniel made his way toward the café, again leaving me a puddle on the floor. He knew Ronin was at Fire and Ice. He knew Ronin would see us, perhaps, follow us. I knew then, I was dealing with a mastermind, already working the plan before I even knew I was a part of it.

  Chapter Five

  DANIEL’S ECCENTRIC personality was difficult to get used to, but it was also unusually endearing—kind of like owning a chihuahua. You never knew what they would do, but they were sort of cute in their own way.

  After the Ronin incident in the bookstore, I couldn’t stop my mind from wandering. Did Daniel really know Ronin would be there, or was it a giant cosmic coincidence? And if he did, why didn’t he bother to tell me our plan was a go? We need a name for the plan... focus Hazel. Furthermore, what was Ronin doing at Fire and Ice? Did he take Sara there?

  I couldn’t focus on anything, so I made a silly excuse to leave. Daniel took me home after collecting my things from his house. He knew I was lying when I said I had laundry to do, but I appreciated that he didn’t call me on it. I’d have to find a really amazing girl for him to take to prom, one who would be a good potential girlfriend as well. She’d have to be open-minded for sure because if there was one thing Daniel Starnes was most definitely not, it was normal.

  I dodged Rose and Dizzy in the kitchen, grabbed a drink, and mumbled a hello before making my way to my bedroom to ponder the possibilities for Daniel. Maybe Gina Brooks? She seemed nice, and she did her own thing, sort of like him. Or even, dare I say, Dizzy Martin? She had a mind of her own, a lot like Daniel. I sighed, coming up with no one else off the top of my head.

  Now, what to do about Ronin? He was clearly upset when he caught Daniel kissing me, but was it because he missed me, or because he was still mad at me? I thought about it until I fell asleep well after midnight. I wish I’d gotten more sleep because if I had, I might not have been such a crybaby the next day.

  It started out okay. The first period with Sara wasn’t so bad, especially since I snagged a seat in the back and ignored her hair flipping all period. She was all over Ronin between classes, which was irritating, but what could I do about it without making myself a bigger target for ridicule? I’d humiliated myself enough for one week, thank you.

  After the second period, strange things started happening. Ashley ignored me when I called her name, and she sped up so I couldn’t catch her. Miriam told me she was too busy to go over the physics homework with me, which we did every single day. Then, more surprising than any of the other slights, sweet Erin, who never said a mean word to anyone, snapped at me when I asked to borrow a pencil during fourth period. I had no idea what was going on, but it sucked. However, it was lunch that did me in. I swapped out my morning books for my afternoon books at my locker and grabbed my lunch, ready to sit down and take a break from all the strangeness. But when I got to my regular table, the cheer squad table with the rest of the cheerleaders, someone was in my seat... Sara.

  “Oh, hi, Hazel,” Brit said with a guilty tone. “Um, I think we need to talk.”

  “Okay,” I said cautiously. I tried to put my lunch down, but Ashley pushed it away. “What’s going on?” I knew Sara and I were on the outs, but I assumed the girls wouldn’t choose sides. I thought wrong.

  “It’s nothing personal, Hazel, but we decided we want Sara to be captain. We voted, and it’s been settled,” Ashley said.

  “I’m sorry, we who? Who told you, you could have a random vote and out me with no discussion?” I asked.

  “The handbook, page twenty-one, paragraph four,” Sara said, her sickly sweet and falsely sympathetic voice made me want to jump the table and stab her with her fork.

  “And you all decided this?” I asked, giving Erin a good stare-down.

  “It’s just... with all your drama, and—” Erin started, but I wasn’t having it.

  “I got you to regionals! I did with my cheers. Mine, not Sara’s, mine. And this is how you repay me?” I yelled, g
arnering more attention than necessary, and likely hammering the final nail in my social status’ coffin.

  “Well, yeah, you did all that, but we think you’re in a bad place right now. We’re concerned that cheering will come second to... to... Well, frankly, second to the drama that surrounds your life,” Miriam said.

  I looked at Sara, who had a satisfied smirk on her face. I’d always known she was rough around the edges, but I never thought she was a knife-wielding psychopath who pounced the moment her so-called friend’s back was turned. I felt that knife, twisting in my back as a bone-chilling tingle surged down my spine.

  I growled—a rumble that started in the pit of my stomach and rose through my chest until it erupted into something resembling a howler monkey on a sugar high. I was positioned to pounce, but a strong arm wrapped around my waist and stopped me from doing something stupid like attacking Sara in the middle of the cafeteria.

  “Peaches, why are you trying to sit at the loser table?” Daniel asked—his laid-back attitude a stark contrast to the crazed monkey he held back. He leaned forward and whispered in my ear, “Easy, they aren’t worth the time.”

  “Huh?” I managed to ask, unsure what was happening in my blind rage.

  “Come, sit with me.” Daniel picked up my lunch and slid his hand into mine. He gave the girls a long once over, one at a time with a disgusted look on his face. “You’re too pretty for this table.”

  The speed at which their jaws dropped made me plenty happy, and I forgot I wanted to rip Sara’s eyeballs out. Everyone in the cafeteria stared at us, watching the former cheer captain and ex-girlfriend of the Ronin McKinsey, follow a guy they didn’t know existed... until we stopped at... the stoner table.

  “What are you doing?” I asked in a hushed tone, not wanting to offend anyone, but also not all that excited about sitting with a bunch of potheads.