Ask Me Why: An Enemies to Lovers Standalone Romance

by Harloe Rae

  Copyright © 2019 by Harloe Rae, LLC

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the copyright owner and the publisher listed above, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or purely coincidental.

  Cover Artist: BookCoverKingdom

  Photographer: Eric David Battershell

  Cover Model: Drew Ater

  Interior design and formatting: Champagne Book Design

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  TITLE PAGE

  COYRIGHT

  NOVELS BY HARLOE RAE

  DEDICATION

  ASK ME WHY

  PLAYLIST

  EPIGRAPH

  PROLOGUE

  CHAPTER ONE

  CHAPTER TWO

  CHAPTER THREE

  CHAPTER FOUR

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CHAPTER SIX

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAPTER NINE

  CHAPTER TEN

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

  CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

  EPILOGUE

  BONUS EPILOGUE

  GENT SNEAK PEEK

  ALSO BY HARLOE RAE

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Reclusive Standalones

  Redefining Us

  Forget You Not

  #BitterSweetHeat Standalones

  GENT

  MISS

  LASS

  Total Standalones

  Watch Me Follow

  Ask Me Why

  This book is dedicated to Renee Mccleary.

  It’s the little things that matter most, and count for more than given credit. You’re truly amazing.

  And to alpha a-holes. No further explanation necessary.

  ASK ME WHY

  One deep breath. Two slow blinks. Three hollow beats.

  I’m still here.

  After three years, that reminder isn’t as necessary. But everyone has their bad days. This is definitely one of them. Until an adorable little boy dashes into my store. His zest for life makes me smile in a way that’s been long lost. Then I meet his father.

  Well, confront is more like it.

  Brance Stone is volatile.

  Offensive.

  Harsh.

  And can’t be bothered to care.

  Not that I want him to. I get frostbite just looking into Brance’s glacial stare. But there’s something undeniable about him.

  My misery suddenly craves company. The suffocating numbness lifts whenever Brance is near. That alone should have me running in the opposite direction. Try as I might, there’s no avoiding him. If only I could understand why. As if he’d let me.

  I don’t ask. He doesn’t tell. A silent, bitter truce settles between us.

  That was our first mistake.

  It’s certainly not the last.

  “At My Weakest” – James Arthur

  “Weak” – Halloran & Kate

  “How Long Will I Love You” – Ellie Goulding

  “Queens Don’t” – RaeLynn

  “You & I” – John Legend

  “Stand By You” – Rachel Platten

  “Wild Love” – James Bay

  “Rainbows” – Kacey Musgraves

  “Always” – Isak Danielson

  “Till the Sun Comes Up” – Gavin James

  Listen now on Spotify

  “The moment you stop believing is the instant everything loses meaning.” —Braelyn Miller

  Braelyn

  Crash

  A gust of fierce wind nearly knocks me sideways, but I barely feel it. My skirt billows wildly behind me while I follow the dirt path. I try to avoid rocks and debris, but burning moisture clouds my vision. I swipe furiously at the tears that never seem to quit.

  Why would they?

  My body is in an utter state of misery, seeping from every pore and molecule. I’m being cracked in half by a jagged edge. Anything good is currently draining out of me. Soon there will be nothing left. But that suits me fine. I don’t want to be here without him.

  The grief is all consuming, unforgiving and unrelenting. Devon’s death was a nuclear bomb. Everything has crumbled into rubble and dust. We had so many plans together, all tightly woven and tied to one another. The impossibilities scatter through the tall grass in front of me. I’ll never be whole again, just a jumble of unrecognizable pieces. There’s no me without him. But here I stand. Alone.

  I twirl the ring on my finger. The significance of what could have been seems to fade without his presence. But I can’t bear to take it off. Not yet, maybe not ever. Somehow that makes all of this more permanent. I need to keep pretending for the sliver of sanity remaining.

  There’s a bitter breeze coming off the lake. My hair whips around and several strands stick to my wet cheeks. I’m so cold. This chill is bone-deep, soaking into my marrow. The hole in my chest expands and I’ll never be warm again. Just like Devon, buried six feet under. They said I was lucky to survive—this type of accident is almost always fatal. The fact I’m still standing is some sort of miracle.

  Why does it feel like I died with him?

  I shiver when the memories crash into me. I don’t have enough energy or willpower to stop the torment from taking control. Needles prickle along my scalp, sliding down to cover my entire body. The nightmare taunts me on repeat, and I can’t escape. I’m back in our mangled car, suspended upside down. Devon is staring at me, unblinking and completely still. His eyes are frozen wide open. The deep brown color had always been vibrant and intoxicating. Now there’s no sign of life, only dull emptiness remains. I scream and yell until my throat is on fire. But no one ever hears me.

  The vision vanishes with a strangled gasp. I curl my fingers until the bite of pain stings my palms. Numbness blankets me, a protective shield against the onslaught of agony. The sensation of nothingness has already replaced my heart, taken my soul. Might as well have the rest of me.

  Is this my new normal?

  I move toward the cliff’s edge, peering down into the calm water. The serenity waiting below is tempting me. How easy would it be to jump? Put an end to this suffering? It would only take a few measly steps. I stare at my feet and beg them to take the leap. This might be the end. I can’t live like this.

  A low howl carries over the wind, and I look toward the sound. There’s a rainbow arching through the cloudy sky. My vision blurs and I swallow roughly.

  “Devon, come back to me.” The impossible words tremble off my lips. He’s gone forever, but that
doesn’t stop the desperation from sprouting roots. I squint and can almost picture his smile blending into the backdrop. My knees wobble. I almost collapse under the weight of it all.

  How can I move on? The future seems so bleak.

  With a shuddering breath I barely manage to take, my sluggish brain begins to process. It’s not my time to go. I blink slowly and shuffle away from the ledge. A hollow beat echoes through my chest. I exhale harshly, infusing my battered systems with some form of strength. For him, I’ll push forward. I’ll live for both of us.

  This battle is just beginning, and tomorrow is a new day.

  Braelyn

  Taffy

  The mug trembles in my grasp as I set it on the table. I stretch out my fingers, but the tremor remains. Ice fills my veins. I quickly glance around the crowded coffee house, finding nothing out of sorts. There’s a long line by the register and most of the seats are already occupied. But groups of people don’t bother me.

  Why can’t I shake this? I rub at my numb arms, the constant chill clinging harder than usual. After three years, the dull ache in my chest is deeper than ever. I hardly notice the hollow sensation anymore. But the cruel memories strike often enough that I’ll never forget. Not that I ever could.

  Those less than friendly reminders are always lurking, lodged in a hidden part I can’t reach. The visions from hours ago still hover in the forefront of my conscience. Whispers echo in my ears. I can’t take a decent breath. My eyes feel puffy and dry. I rub at them to alleviate the sting. It doesn’t help. At least the awful churning in my stomach quit.

  A thick sigh eases out of me. I inhale slowly. The strong aroma of dark roast and early mornings fill my lungs. That calms my racing pulse slightly. I let my lashes flutter closed, blocking out the hustle and bustle around me. I’ve learned to deal, somewhat.

  “Hey, you okay?”

  I lift my gaze and meet Sadie’s worried stare. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  She reaches for my hand. “You don’t have to pretend, honey. Not with me.”

  My heart pounds a steady rhythm as I find comfort in her genuine expression. I scratch my temple and dig for an explanation. Too bad the caffeine hasn’t kicked in.

  “I know, and thanks. It’s just the same old shit. I don’t need to drop more weight in your lap.” I attempt a smile, but my lips aren’t cooperating.

  Sadie’s frown deepens. “Do you need help at the store today? I can cover for you.”

  I wave off her concern. “No, no. I’ll snap out of it. I just… didn’t sleep well.” And that’s putting it very lightly. These lingering effects of trauma are nasty. The flashbacks are fewer and further between. But when they hit? Total annihilation. Those moments leave me shattered.

  “There’s more to it, Brae. I can see the pain on your face.”

  I smooth my features, the urge to hide fierce. “The struggle has been rougher than usual lately. I had a bad episode, nightmare included. That’s all.”

  “Want to talk about it?”

  I shrug and look away.

  She leans closer. “Was this one about the accident? Or him?”

  My eyes burn. “You can say his name. Not sure it’ll get worse. I saw Devon, like last time.”

  “It’s not your fault for living, Brae. He’d want you to be happy. It’s not a crime to carry on.” Sadie’s tone is meant to be soothing, but it chafes my skin like sandpaper.

  I take a gulp of coffee to clear the grit from my throat. “Yes, I know. My therapist pounded that message into my brain loud and clear for two years.”

  “So, why don’t you believe it?”

  “Some days are far worse than others, okay? The loneliness gets to me. Then I think about him, and what we lost. A downward spiral shortly follows.”

  “The anniversary is coming up, right?”

  I chew on the inside of my cheek. “Next month.”

  She reaches for my hand again. “Maybe you should schedule an emergency session with Doctor Thair.”

  I curl my shoulders in tighter. “I can handle it on my own. This was just a bad episode. She’ll tell me everything I already know to do. I’ve got a pile of coping strategies.”

  “You’re sure?” Her eyes are pleading with me.

  I avert my focus to a crack in the ceiling. “Positive. Being at work helps keep my mind occupied. I’ll be good as new by tonight.” The lie rolls easily off my tongue. Sadie is my closest friend, but she doesn’t need to waste more breath on me. Lord knows I’ve taken enough from her.

  Her grin is sad. “Okay, I’ll back off.”

  “Thank you,” I murmur.

  She taps her phone screen. “Are we ready to go? If you don’t want help, I should get my ass to the office.”

  I quickly slurp down the rest of my drink and stand. “Anything interesting planned this week?” Hearing about her projects gives me something else to think about.

  “We’re finalizing the layouts for a chic boutique downtown. It’ll be the place to shop once we’re done.” Sadie bumps her shoulder into mine as we step outside. The sun is already high and heating the air. It’s going to be another hot one.

  “Can’t wait to see it. Will they sell swimsuits?”

  “Only the skimpiest.” She wiggles her brows. “We can lounge by the lake without getting tan lines.”

  I snort and roll my eyes. “Oh, that’s hilarious. Might as well go to France and visit a nude beach.”

  She grabs my arm. “Do you want to?”

  Her obvious excitement gives me pause.

  “Uh, maybe?” I kick at some pebbles on the sidewalk.

  “That’s better than an immediate no. We’re young and should act like it.”

  “Speak for yourself. I feel ancient.”

  Sadie shakes her head. “But you’re not.”

  We stop in front of Thicket, my little shop, and share a quick embrace.

  “Love you, friend. I appreciate you meeting me,” I whisper.

  She pulls away and squeezes my upper arms. “I’m always here for you, Brae. No matter what.”

  I nod slowly. “I owe you a trip to Europe just for that.”

  She bounces on her toes. “Yes! Please, please? A vacation would do us both a lot of good.”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  “And I’ll call you later. Let me know if you need anything.”

  I give her a light shove. “You’re gonna be late.”

  She blows me a kiss and starts walking backward. “Love you, lady. You’ve got this shit.”

  “I’m a strong, independent woman,” I recite.

  “Exactly,” she calls and points at me.

  I manage to laugh and turn toward the door, unlocking it quickly. After disabling the alarm, I flip the lights on and watch my pride come to life. I pour everything into this space. If it wasn’t for Thicket, I’d be a lost cause. Owning this store gives me a reason to wake up and keep moving.

  Other than Sadie, I don’t have much pushing me along. My family is all out of state, too far away to be bothered. Not that I blame them. My parents have their own problems to deal with. They don’t need to take on more. And it’s better for me if they stay away. My siblings are busy finding adventure at every turn. I’m doing my best to accomplish a small semblance of that.

  With a slow spin, I take a long look around. Collections of odds and ends cover any available surface. This piece of property is all mine. Well, my name is clearly printed on the lease. But that’s a minor detail. In my mind, this space is bought and paid for. Maybe it will be one day. A girl can dream.

  That stops me short. Devon was the one who encouraged me to fulfill my fantasies. With him gone, most of those hopes were dashed. Except this one. Thicket is what’s left for me.

  The morning bleeds into afternoon as it always does. A steady stream of customers keeps me busy without pause so the haunting memories fade into the background. I’m about to start unpacking a new shipment of mugs when a twinge in my chest stops me.

  When I b
link, a blur of movement outside the window catches my eye. All I see is a patch of red dashing by in a hurry. I furrow my brow and concentrate on the task at hand. After a quick beat, the welcome chime sounds and a little boy darts inside. I’m guessing he’s around four or five, hints of baby fat showing off his youth. His light eyes are blown wide open as he scans the shop from wall to wall. Something grabs his attention and he skips forward. I follow his stare, trying to figure out what he’s focusing on.

  He dashes down the far aisle in a flurry I can barely track. His tiny feet pound on the floor as he searches the shelves. He zips this way and that, a super-charged pinball darting around the confining alley. His delight is infectious and impossible to ignore. I feel my spirits lifting, just like that.

  As I continue watching him hunt, his excitement bounces in every direction. I gladly absorb it all, the layer of ice under my skin thawing ever so slightly. He’s bubbling with pure happiness and carefree bliss. I lift my lips in the most genuine smile I can muster. He makes it easier. This kid radiates everything that’s good in the world.

  Eventually he circles back and screeches to a halt in front of me, slightly out of breath. “Where is it?”

  I move from behind the counter. “What’re you looking for?”

  “Candy! I saw a lollypop on your sign.” His chubby cheeks are dented with glee and I feel my smile stretching in return. A mop of brown hair flops over his forehead and he sweeps it away with stubby fingers.

  Gosh, he’s adorable.

  This cutie pie is stealing all my attention so I don’t notice the woman standing by the entrance. Until she clears her throat, very loudly.

  Our gazes whip in her direction.

  “Oliver John, what did we just discuss?” Her mouth is set in a firm line, showing off deep wrinkles.

  Oliver’s dimples melt away, and he stares at the ground. “I’m not supposed to run off.”

  “And what did you do?”

  “But—”