by Swati MH
Paula smiles softly. “He sounds a lot like John.”
“Really?”
“Yes. As you know, John and I met in college at a mutual friend’s birthday party. Sparks flew between us then, but I told him that I wasn’t the type to be just another fly on the pot. Unfortunately, he never called me after the party. I’d see him on campus with his arm around some new girl week after week, but I refused to just be a number.”
“So, how did you two finally get together?”
“Well, I stopped waiting for him to come talk to me. One day he saw me talking to one of the college football players, and he came over to ask me for notes to a class I took the previous semester. When I tried to brush him off, he had the audacity to sit on the chair between me and the football player and pester me about the class! Eventually, the other guy gave up and left, but John says it was that day he decided I was the one for him.”
“I don’t get it. What made that event such a turning point for him?”
Paula takes a sip of her on tea. “Well, I think he realized how headstrong and independent I was. While other girls wanted his attention, I wanted his heart, which he didn’t part with easily. And while I initially found the entire act of him interrupting my date a bit caveman-like, I can’t say I wasn’t flattered by it. It took him a bit, but things progressed when he finally put his heart on the line for me. We were both really different--he was charming and outgoing while I was quiet and reserved--the yin to my yang, but we worked.”
Twisting the cup in my hand, I consider Paula’s words for a few minutes. Was Vik the yin to my yang? Even putting aside our astrological signs, we couldn’t be more different. He’s an extrovert, always in search of a thrill, while I’m content sitting at home, curled up on the couch with a book. He lets life lead him while I create clear and certain plans. He racks up short-term, meaningless connections while I yearn for a lifelong companion. But could we work?
It doesn’t matter. He’s leaving in a few weeks.
Mind and body only, remember? You made the rules.
“Cass, what I’m saying is, don’t be afraid to explore this new side of you. It may have been yearning to come out all this time. And don’t be so hard on the charmers.” She winks. “Most of the time, they don’t give away their hearts as easily as their smooth lines . . . but when they do, it’s usually for good.”
She pats me on the shoulder before getting up to put her cup in the dishwasher, letting me sit there to ruminate a bit longer. “How’s your dad liking his new job?”
“He likes working for his old boss.” I recall the text I exchanged with Dad earlier where he filled me in on their conversation. He went out to dinner with his team from work and seemed really excited about it. “He’s only working part-time for now, which is great because I don’t want him to overwhelm himself. But more than anything, I think he likes the social aspects of working again, too.”
“Oh, I bet. He’s so outgoing. I’m sure he missed being in a team environment all these months.”
I nod. “That’s definitely a trait I didn’t acquire from him. Unless I’m really close to someone, I like being alone for the most part.”
“Yes, but you did acquire the hardworking and thoughtfulness from your dad. I don’t know many people who devote themselves to their jobs like you do.”
I shrug away thoughts of the disheveled green stall, paint peeling off the door, and random phone numbers written on the side guaranteeing a ‘good time’. “It’s not just work to me.”
Paula comes back to the table and places a hand over mine, her eyes conveying her understanding. “I know, sweetie.”
After updating her on Avni’s pregnancy news and Dad’s health a bit more, I give Paula a hug and walk back to my house.
The smell of barbecue from someone grilling in their backyard hits my nose as I walk across the street and toward the home I’ve lived in for most of my life. My mind whirls with thoughts as hysterical giddiness settles in my stomach.
I’m going over to Vik’s again tonight.
I told him that I wanted to have fun for the rest of the time he’s here. Me. Cassandra Livingston said those words. There was no need to qualify what that meant with additional explanations, either. We both knew exactly what I meant by fun, and surprisingly, no part of me regrets it.
Maybe an alien entity has inhabited my body.
There’s a small part of the old me who’s still at odds with this new me on whether this is a good idea, but the new me is prevailing, telling the old me to shut the hell up and to quit being such a cock-blocker. This path may not lead to the destination I’d imagined for myself in the long run, but sometimes you need to wander off course to have a more fulfilling adventure.
I walk in through the front door and see Dad sitting on the couch with the remote in his hand. “Hey, Dad.” I go over to kiss the top of his head from behind the sofa. “When did you get home?”
“Not too long ago.” He beams at me. “I had fun with my team. We had some heavy appetizers at the bowling alley, so don’t worry about dinner for me.”
“You feeling okay? Not too tired or anything?” I ask, eyeing him warily.
“No, so far I’m okay, but I’ll turn in early.”
“Okay.” I mentally prepare to let him know that I’m going over to Vik’s. My dad is pretty relaxed about me spending time with men, but he doesn’t usually hear me say that I’ve actually signed up to do so. “I’m going over to a friend’s house tonight. I’ll be home late, so don’t worry too much. But call me if you need me.”
My dad’s eyebrows rise in alarm. “Which friend?”
I clear my throat unnecessarily. “Remember I was telling you about how Avni’s cousin was in town for a fellowship at the hospital? Well, I’m going to go spend some time with him while he’s here for another few weeks.”
My dad nods slowly, probably debating whether he should ask more. “Okay. Well, have fun.”
“Thanks, Dad. Don’t forget to take your meds,” I remind him, walking into my room, debating whether I should change. I’m wearing cutoff denim shorts and a flowy, peach-colored Bohemian top. I decide to keep the outfit and reapply some lip gloss. It’s when I’m grabbing my purse off the bed that I hear my phone buzz in my back pocket.
I hope you’re on your way here.
I bite my bottom lip, hoping to submerge the little smile bubbling to the surface. Eager much?
Fuck yeah, I’m eager. You’ve been a distraction all day.
Those poor patients. I type back.
No kidding. I think I accidentally attached someone’s knee to their hip bone!
I giggle, typing out the response after waving to my dad and walking to my car. That’s not going to bode well for your fellowship, Dr. Bedi. I’m not sure what that says about your skills.
I receive a message from him moments later. You know what’s not going to bode well? If you don’t get your ass over to my place in the next few minutes so I can give you another demonstration of my . . . skills.
19
Vik
“You can do this,” I repeat to myself as I empty the Thai food into bowls and talk through my plan for tonight in my head.
She wants to just have fun for the next few weeks. Mind and body only, no hearts involved. The proposal should have me jumping to ask her where to sign. Hell, it’s exactly the rules I live by--lived by! But my gut says I should run while I have the chance. I have a feeling it will be easier to learn how to land a jet mid-flight than to keep this completely casual.
But I have to. I start my new position at New York Presbyterian in just over a month, so complicating my life with any attachments here would be silly. And finding a full-time position in San Diego now seems unlikely. Not that I’ve really looked, not that she’d want me to.
I hear the soft knock on the door as I’m setting out our bowls. I run my hand through my hair, checking it once in the mirror before opening it. My eyes start on her smooth, tan legs under ripped shorts before w
orking themselves over her torso and the low V-neck of her shirt, enticing them to linger there a little longer.
She gives me a shy smile before I open the door a little wider to invite her in, but what I really want to do is pick her up wordlessly and take her into my bedroom. What I really want to do is drag those tight shorts off her ass and push myself inside her. And what I really want to do is kiss her full pink lips and show her just how much I want her.
Slow down there, soldier. All in due time. The night is still young.
“You’re so gorgeous,” I rasp instead, leaning in to give her a hug. My nose buries itself into her coconut-scented hair, inhaling her like a fresh breeze.
“Thanks,” she whispers softly into my ear. “It smells so good in here.”
I close the door behind her and lead her to the table near my kitchen. “I have no idea if you like Thai or not, but if you don’t, we can order something else or I can make pasta.”
She follows me, looking around like it’s the first time she’s been here. I don’t think she took in the surroundings the last time she was here since we were . . . preoccupied with more important things. The apartment came furnished, decorated, and well-stocked so thankfully, I didn’t have to bring much with me when I moved here.
“No, I love Thai food.” She sits down in front of one of the place settings I’d put out on the small breakfast table. “I love anything with a lot of flavor--Thai, Indian, Mexican.”
“Yes, well, we’ve already established that you like Indian.” I wink at her.
She shakes her head but there’s an unmistakable smile curling her lips.
“Do you want something to drink? I have wine, soda, and water,” I ask.
“I’ll take water.”
“So, what’s your favorite Indian food?” I walk to the cupboard to get her a glass. After filling it and getting a beer for myself from the fridge, I come back to sit with her.
“Honestly, I love everything Avni’s mom makes. There’s something fresh and more delicious when it’s homemade,” she says thoughtfully. “What about you?”
“Oh, that’s an easy one. My mom’s homemade masala dosas. There’s nothing like them in this world.”
She takes a spoonful of her panang curry and rice and moans. I tell the guy in my pants that the sound wasn’t for him . . . not yet at least. “So good. I was so hungry. I had a piece of lemon bar at my neighbor’s house but it clearly wasn’t enough.”
I chew my food and hesitate a little before probing further. I still remember her deflection from when we went surfing. “You said you had to take care of your dad before you came over. Is he alright?”
She takes a sip of water, seemingly debating whether to let her guard down or not. “He has Lupus,” she reveals after a moment. “He’s had it for many years now and some years are worse than others. His doctor started him on some steroids, and that’s been a game changer for him the past few weeks.”
“I’m sorry he’s dealing with that. I know it can be rough.” I watch her take another spoonful of her food. “So, is it just you and him?”
“Yeah. My mom died when I was fifteen. She had cancer.” She pierces a piece of chicken with her fork and sees the look on my face. “It’s okay, though. I mean, not okay, but I’ve made peace with it. We weren’t very close.”
“Oh.” I want to ask why. I want to know so much more, but I already know that just the amount of information she’s given me is likely beyond what she’s comfortable with and I don’t want to push her too fast. “So, no siblings, either?”
“Nope, just me and Dad. You have a brother, right?”
I finish up the last bits on my plate and move it aside before leaning back in my chair, holding my beer. “Yeah, just Vinnie and me. Pops died a few years ago.”
“I saw a picture of your mom and your brother on your desk. You and your brother look so similar.”
I chuckle, remembering the meme Vinnie sent me last night of an old man yawning just to annoy me. He’d also told me recently that things with him and Priya were getting serious and he really liked her. Nothing made me happier than seeing my brother happy about something. “Yeah, we get that a lot.”
“I saw the crutches he had in the picture and at Avni’s wedding. What’s the reason for them?”
I like the way she asks the question without judgment or a preconceived notion. Most of my life, people have either ignored my brother or asked about him in a roundabout way. So, Cassie inquiring about him almost as casually as one would ask about his favorite color makes me like her even more.
“He was born with spina bifida, so he has limited mobility in his legs.”
She moves a basil leaf from one end of her plate to the other. “That must be hard for him. He seems like a really happy guy though, at least from what I saw.”
“Yeah, he’s one of those ridiculously positive people who make you wonder if the sun just shines a little brighter where he stands. I don’t think he considers his disability as anything more than a minor inconvenience.”
She smiles and my eyes follow the ascent of her lips. “That’s amazing. So, is he the reason you decided to pursue pediatric orthopedic surgery?”
Damn, she’s astute. My like-meter just rose a bit more. “Maybe,” I admit, taking another sip and evading the question but only enough to where she knows the answer. “Maybe I just wanted to get a fellowship in San Diego so I could save you all those times.”
She laughs, making my chest feel tighter. Don’t get used to that sound. “Right. You’re a regular knight in shining armor. What would I do without you?”
“I ask myself the same thing everyday.”
“You’re insufferable, you know that?” Her scowl is tinged with a smile she’s failing to suppress.
Seeing that she’s finished eating, I lean forward and grab her hand. She gets up from her seat and walks over to mine to sit on my lap, straddling me. Her hands immediately find my scalp as we stare at each other, our hearts pounding in unison. My eyes move between hers, mesmerized by the tinsel of golden dust in her irises. You can really only see them when you’re this close to her. And as unfair as it is, I silently wish that no other man ever gets close enough to see them. They’re mine. Each speck of floating treasure in her eyes is meant only for me.
Angling my face forward, I catch her lips with mine while my hands hover over her ass, urging her forward. I love the taste of her--sweet and spicy, identical to her personality--noticeable, delicious, and unforgettable. She moans into our unhurried kiss, working her hips over mine and causing everything in my body to ignite. My tongue finds hers as my hand moves on its own accord under her shirt to her breast. Pulling down the cup of her bra, I thumb her nipple, eliciting another moan from her.
“Cass?” I whisper against her lips.
She’s breathless and needy, her lips moving to my neck, kissing and sucking, as her hips continue to grind what is sure to become an embarrassing situation for me in the next ten seconds. “Mmm?”
I grab her hands and pull back slightly, getting her attention. “There’s nothing more I want to do than to take you right here on this table, right now.”
“Then do it. Who’s stopping you?”
“Me.” I lean in to kiss her mouth. I can’t even help it. “Let’s slow down just a little bit.”
She nods, frustrated but understanding. “Yeah, I know. You’re right. I just wish you didn’t have to look so sexy and swoony all the time.”
I laugh, pulling her closer. “So you do think I’m sexy and swoony.”
“God, why did I even tell you?” She shakes her head, pretending to want to take the words back. “Your ego does not need any more inflating.”
“It definitely does when it comes to you. Most of the time you hate me.”
She kisses my neck, tightening her hands in my hair. “Does it feel like I hate you right now?”
“Keep doing that a little longer and maybe I’ll finally believe that you don’t.” She giggles as I pic
k her up--her arms and legs instinctively wrap around me--and kiss her as I walk us to my bed. “Let’s get to know each other a little bit. Mind and body only, of course.”
“What do you have in mind?” she asks as I settle her on my bed. She scoots back, laying on her elbows, as I crawl up to hover over her.
I cover her body with mine and find the spot where her shoulder and neck connect with my lips, inhaling the scent of her skin. “How about we play a spinoff of Two Truths And A Lie?” I move to lay on my side next to her as she turns toward me. “Basically, I’ll tell you something about myself, and you have to guess if I’m telling you the truth or lying.”
“Hmm, so for example, if you say something like, ‘I’m not a manwhore and haven’t bedded most of the single women in this apartment complex,’ I’ll know you’re lying.”
“Ha. Ha. You’re so funny.” I tickle her side, making her squirm and giggle. “Or if you say, ‘It wouldn’t bother me if you came home with Bella,’ I’d know you were full of shit.”
She pulls my collar so my face is only an inch from hers. “You better not come home with Becca.”
“What about anyone else?”
She peers into my eyes, vulnerability emerging in her own. “If that’s what you want, then . . ..”
I close any distance between us so she can feel my body’s response to her. “You’re who I want.”
“Did you just start the game? Am I supposed to guess if that was a lie?”
“Go ahead. Take a guess.”
Her hand skims down my abs to the bulge in my jeans ready to free itself at a moment’s notice. A hiss slips from my lips as she runs her hand over it, purposefully. “I’m pretty sure I don’t need to guess this one.” Color rises in her cheeks as she drags her hand back up and under my shirt. “Is it my turn?”
“Yes.”
“Hmm.” She makes an adorable face like she’s thinking. “I’m an advanced-level pianist but haven’t touched the piano in over a decade.”