“I’m so sorry, baby,” she cried. He placed their hands against her face, and he shook his head. “I’m so sorry for messing up so much. I’ve screwed up everything.”
“Be here now, Ma,” he replied. “It’s okay.”
She bit her lip and looked down at her hospital gown, and all of the cords and bandages attached to her body. “I want to go to rehab,” she softly spoke.
Kellan and I nodded in agreement.
“Me too,” another voice said.
I turned to see Sadie. She had glassy eyes, and was fidgeting a little, but she gave me a smile.
“Okay,” I said.
She nodded. “Okay. I don’t know how I’m going to do it. Have this baby on my own. I don’t have anyone.”
I nudged her. “It’s fine. That kid, he’s going to be my brother. And where I come from, you do anything for your brother. I’ll help you. You have family now, Sadie. You don’t have to figure it all out on your own anymore. Promise.”
46
Alyssa
Two weeks passed since the incident with Logan’s parents. Julie entered rehab, and had been there for days, struggling, but fighting for her life. Sadie was getting clean too, finding her footing.
Everything was getting back to normal. Except for the fact that Erika was still staying with our mom, which was far from normal. It was actually a bit terrifying. On Saturday afternoon, I headed over to Mom’s house, with a box in my hands, and pounded on the front door.
When it opened, Erika cocked an eyebrow. “Hey, Aly. What’s up?”
“Um, what’s up is the fact that you’re staying with Mom? You know what, never mind. Go get your things. It’s time to go.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Remember your life? Your fiancé? Yeah. It’s time for you to go home. Kellan—”
“Doesn’t want me. He doesn’t want me there, Alyssa.”
“He needs you.”
Mom appeared in the doorway, her eyes narrowed. “What are you talking about? Erika finally has come to her senses. She’s getting her life back before she made a huge mistake. I’m so proud of her for realizing this.”
“Mom, can you do something for me?” I asked.
“What?”
“Just mind your own damn business. Just for once in your life, mind your business.”
She huffed, but before she could reply, I yanked Erika out of the house and closed the door behind her. Erika frowned. “Listen, Alyssa. I tried with Kellan. I really tried. But he made it loud and clear that he didn’t want me there, so I’m not.”
“Come home, Erika. Right now.”
“No.”
“Fine.” I opened my box and arched an eyebrow. “But I tried to warn you.”
Her eyes widened when she saw her plate collection in the box. “What are you doing, Alyssa?” I started tipping the box over, and she jumped as they all crashed to the ground. “Oh my gosh!”
“Logan! Come here.” I called him over, and he hopped out of the car with a box in his hands. “Tell Erika to come home.”
Erika was shaking, biting her bottom lip. Logan walked over to her, stared her in the eyes, and smiled. “You’re my sister.”
“Stop. I’m not.”
“You scream at me. You hate my guts. You treat me like shit. You call me stupid. You’re my sister, Erika. And screw Kellan right now. Right now I need you to come home. I can’t help him without you.”
“I can’t,” she said. “I can’t do this.”
Logan nodded, opening the box with Erika’s favorite glassware. “Come home.”
“I am home.”
“Okay.” He started tipping the box over, and she cringed.
“No, Logan! I just bought—” Crash! Glass pieces went scattering across the ground. “Oh my God! What is wrong with you two?!”
“We want you to come home, that’s all,” I explained.
“I can’t keep doing this. I can’t do dysfunctional anymore.”
I gestured toward the windows to the house, where Mom watched our every move, pounding on the glass, yelling for Erika to go back inside. “And you think that’s normal?”
“Go away, you two. Please. Kellan doesn’t need me.”
“Yes I do.” We all turned to see Kellan walking toward us with a box of his own. He stood at the edge of the driveway, and locked eyes with Erika. “I miss you. I want you. I need you, Erika.” He dumped all of the items in his box to the ground, and released the box.
“Come home.”
Erika laughed, and then we all started laughing with her. Mom opened the front door, came rushing out, and ordered Erika to come back inside, but she refused to listen.
We all walked back to the cars, leaving our pain in the broken pieces of glass on the ground, and starting over again—together. Kellan rode home with Erika in her car, and Logan drove mine.
“Hey, I was thinking… Want to have some crazy, wild sexual escapades before the event at Jacob’s restaurant tonight?”
I shrugged, unamused. “I guess. Or, we can watch the new documentary on Michael Jackson that I bought yesterday and eat leftover pizza and raspberry Oreos.”
His eyes widened. “Oh my God. I love it when you talk filthy to me.”
He kissed me, and I knew that our forever was beginning that very minute.
“Okay, so here’s the plan. I go to Jacob’s restaurant and help set up all the final details. You go to Kellan and Erika’s place, pick them up, and talk them into coming out for drinks, which Kellan will agree to, Erika will refuse going out, and then somehow still end up coming because she loves Kellan and will do anything to make him happy,” Logan explained, standing up to leave after we watched the documentary.
“Right.”
“God. I’m nervous and the party isn’t even for me,” he grinned. I gave him a kiss as he hurried out of the house.
“Are you sure you don’t want a ride to Jacob’s?”
“No, I’m fine. It’s nice out. I’ll see you soon!”
After he left, I headed straight over to my sister’s place, where she did exactly as Logan thought she would, refused to come.
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea to go out for drinks, Alyssa. We’re both pretty tired,” Erika frowned. “Maybe next week.”
“Ah, come on! It will be fun! Plus, Logan’s working tonight at Jacob’s so we can annoy him by ordering food and sending it back nonstop. It will be so epic!”
Kellan smiled. “That does sound kind of fun. And I miss fun.”
Erika narrowed her eyes. “You want to go?”
He nodded rapidly.
“Seriously? You’re not tired?”
He shook his head rapidly.
She sat in deep thought for a moment as Kellan and I gave her the biggest puppy dog eyes she’d ever seen. When she finally gave in, we both cheered with excitement.
“One appetizer and one drink! Water for this dude,” she smiled, nodding toward Kellan.
“Just so you know, I’m going to sip my water really, really slow.”
When we arrived at Jacob’s restaurant, Erika frowned. “Why is there a closed sign on the door? It’s six in the evening.”
“I don’t know, that’s weird.” I grabbed the handle and turned, opening the door. “It’s unlocked. Come on, let’s see if Jacob is here.”
The moment we stepped inside, Erika gasped as she saw all of the wedding decorations. The place was packed solid with all of their friends, shouting, “Surprise!”
“What’s going on?” Erika asked, her eyes shooting back and forth.
Jacob came over, wrapping his arm around Kellan. “I’ll take care of this guy, and Alyssa, you help your sister out. The ladies room is free for you both.”
“For what?” Erika asked, still flustered, but I grabbed her arm and pulled her along with me. When we stepped into the bathroom, her hands covered her mouth. “Why is my wedding dress here, Aly?”
I smiled, almost feeling her overwhelmed energy. “I
thought you knew? You’re getting married today.”
“What?”
“I said, you’re getting married today.” Her eyes started to water, and I shook my head. “Oh no. No crying. The make-up artist is going to be here in a few minutes. And we have to get you ready.”
“You mean… That wedding out there… Those decorations, those people. That’s my wedding?”
I nodded.
She huffed, placing her hands on her hips in disbelief. “You did this for me?”
“It was Logan’s idea.” She bit her bottom lip and started shivering. “Aw, honey. Don’t cry.”
“I’m not,” she sobbed, covering her face with her hands. “That was just a really, really nice thing for him to do.”
We hurried to get her ready, placing her into her beautiful white wedding gown, pinning her hair up into a delicate bun, and we laughed and laughed while drinking champagne. “Are you ready, sis?” I asked, standing behind her in my maid of honor dress.
“Yes. I just wish Mom was…”
I frowned. “I know.”
“But, it doesn’t matter. Tonight is about Kellan and me. Tonight is ours.”
When we walked out to the restaurant, Jacob was standing onstage with a microphone in his hand, ready to officiate the ceremony. To his left was Kellan in a suit and tie, and beside Kellan was Logan. My eyes danced across his face, taking in all of him. His smile was wide and spread to his eyes. His beautiful locks of hair were missing, though. All of his hair was gone, freshly shaved to match his brother. Not only did Erika tear up, but water fell from my eyes.
I loved him.
For always. For always. For always.
“You stay here,” I said to my sister. “Don’t move until you hear me playing, then go meet your soon to be husband.”
Erika was still in a beautiful shock, but she nodded. I headed over to the piano and began to play as I watched my sister walk down the aisle toward the love of her life. Tears fell down her cheeks, and tears fell down mine.
They deserved this moment. They deserved it more than anyone in the world. Jacob read his script, and the two lovers exchanged their vows, promising each other the hard days and the calm days. The painful heartbreaks, and the beautiful heartbeats. The forever and always. When they kissed, everyone in the room felt the love they shared.
Then, they were rushed out of the room, laughing and crying, and loving. Logan grabbed the microphone from Jacob, and waited a few more minutes before I gave him the sign that Erika and Kellan were ready for their grand entry. His lips parted, and he smiled as he spoke. “Ladies and gents, it is my pleasure to introduce to you for the first time ever, Mr. and Mrs. Kellan Evans!” He gestured over to Erika on the left side of the room, and then gestured toward Kellan on the right, and they walked out, meeting one another in the middle of the dance floor. “Before we dive into a night of fun, I figured I’d give my best man speech now. So, wherever you are, grab a drink, and listen up.”
He gave a tight smile, and I saw the tears form in his eyes that he tried his best to blink away. “My brother Kellan is a superhero. He might not save cities, he might not wear a cape, but he changes lives. He’s always lived each day as if it was filled with magic. He smiles even when it hurts. He believes in love, and life, and happy endings. He believes in family. I mean, he believed in me, when I probably didn’t deserve it. He and I grew up different. When he believed in happiness, I was stuck in tragedies, but he still loved me. He loved me through my struggles, through my internal fires, through my pain. He loved me unconditionally. With no limits to that love. And because of that love, I knew I’d never be alone.
“He and Erika love in the same way. Erika loves my brother to her core. She’d go through hell and back to keep him smiling, even when it hurts. She’s caring, she’s smart, she’s gentle. She welcomed me into her home, even though I left messes in every room, because she loved him. She loved him for all that he was, and all of the heavy baggage that came with him—including me. She loved him before cancer, she loved him during cancer, and I swear to God, she’ll love him after cancer. Because her love is unconditional.
“These two individuals are superheroes of love. They showcase how when things get hard, there can always be smiles to be found. They sacrifice for one another, because they know that their love is real. Even when it’s dark, their love somehow shines. These two individuals taught me to embrace love. To believe in happily ever afters. To give my all, unconditionally. So to that, I raise my glass.” He lifted a glass into the air, and stared at his brother and Erika. “To the good days, to the bad days, to the unconditional love that these two taught me to believe in. May we all search for that kind of love, may we all discover that kind of love,” his eyes moved over to me, and a single tear fell down his cheek, as one rolled down mine. “And when we find it, may we hold onto it for always, and always, and always.” I blew him a kiss, and he caught it in his heart before turning back to the couple. “To Kellan and Erika, and their forever kind of love.”
Everyone cheered, everyone drank, and everyone loved. Logan wiped at his eyes and laughed. “Now, please, everyone clear the dance floor as the beautiful married couple share their first dance.”
I joined Logan onstage and took the microphone from his hand. “Your hair is gone,” I whispered, running my hands over his bald head.
He shrugged. “It’s just a haircut.”
“No.” I kissed his forehead. “It’s so much more than that.”
“I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you,” I replied. He moved over to the guitar and picked it up, sitting on top of the stool as I moved to the piano, placed the microphone near me, and waited for him to begin strumming. When I heard the sounds that he only recently learned to play, I smiled, joining him as I played the keys and began singing the intro to Ingrid Michaelson’s song, “The Way I Am.”
Their song.
Kellan and Erika swayed back and forth on the dance floor, falling deeper in love, minute by minute. During the guitar solo, Logan spoke into his microphone as the front door opened to the restaurant. “Please welcome the mothers of the bride and groom to the party.”
Everyone’s eyes widened and cheered as Julie and my mom entered the room together. My heart started pounding against my ribcage as I turned to Logan, shocked. “How?”
He shrugged. “I made a few stops before coming over here.”
You’re my world. My whole, wide world.
The wedding was going amazingly well, with more laughter and happy tears than I’d seen in a long time. When everything wound down, we all walked out to the parking lot of the restaurant, Kellan and Logan still in their suits, and Erika and I still in our dresses.
“Thanks again, Logan and Alyssa. For everything. Tonight was everything I ever dreamed of,” Erika said. The way she looked at Kellan and the way he stared her way showed me what true love really looked like.
“No problem. Kellan, I know you have your doctor’s appointment tomorrow, and I’ll be there. But I think tonight I’ll stay at Alyssa’s, so the newlyweds can have the night to themselves,” Logan said.
He smiled and agreed, but Erika yipped. “No!”
“What?” I asked.
“We have to make one stop before anyone goes their separate ways,” she explained.
“Okay. Where’s that?” Logan asked my sister.
A wicked grin fell against Erika’s lips, and that smile told me exactly where we were about to go.
The four of us stood in aisle five of Pottery Barn, staring at the different plate sets. Erika’s eyes were narrowed, deep in thought, as the rest of us swayed back and forth.
“Did you really have to break all of my things?” She questioned, tilting her head to the left, looking at something that cost more than my bridesmaid dress.
“It was Logan’s idea,” Kellan said, throwing his brother under the bus.
“Alyssa went along with it,” Logan replied.
“Kellan told me yo
u wouldn’t mind,” I chimed in.
“Whatever. I blame you all equally.”
“You can’t blame me!” Kellan said, defensively. “I have—”
“Cancer, we know!” Logan, Erika, and I moaned in unison. He laughed.
“Okay. On the count of three, everyone point at which set I should get before we move on to the glasses. One, two, three!”
“That one!” we all shouted, pointing at different items, then we all began to argue, shouting over each other, laughing, and smiling.
Once the plates were chosen, there was a sense of peace that washed over the once hectic aisle five. I looked around at the people who knew all of each other, the good, the bad, and the destroyed. I saw it. It was still there. Through all of the pain, tears, and destruction, somehow our love for one another survived. Somehow we were all still connected.
My people.
My family.
My tribe.
Somehow, we were unbreakable.
47
Logan
TJ’s office was cold. Colder than it needed to be. But I was used to it by now. I hadn’t missed one appointment with Kellan since I returned to True Falls.
On the left corner of his desk was a jar of jelly beans along with red licorice sitting on the right side. At least he got rid of the black licorice.
I crossed my arms, pressing them against my body for heat. Shit. I was freezing. My eyes moved to the chair right next to me, where Kellan sat.
When I looked up to TJ, I saw his lips moving pretty quickly. He kept explaining the situation over and over again. I couldn’t be certain though, because I wasn’t listening anymore.
I didn’t know the exact moment when I stopped hearing the words flying from his mouth, but for the past five or ten minutes I was simply watching his mouth move.
My hands gripped the side of my chair and I held on tight.
Erika sat on the other side of Kellan’s chair, tears falling against her cheeks. “It’s working?” she said, breaking me from my daze.
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