Heartbroken (Gritt Family Book 1)

by Gabrielle G.

  As I feel my chest tightening from his honesty, I see my mother approaching, holding Alane by the shoulders.

  Bella Gritt is the incarnation of forgiveness.

  She’s undoubtedly hurt that she missed out on her grandson, but she won’t hold a grudge. What’s done is done for her, and it wouldn’t make anything different to hold on to the past. I know her speech by heart. Adam stands up and runs to his mom, taking her in his arms.

  My mother approaches me slowly, her eyes on Adam.

  “I told her we’ll sit together in the coming days, and she can tell me the whole story. I don’t want to hear it from you. I know it hurts, Aaron, but you’ll get over it. You have a chance to build a relationship with that man, and if you reject his mother, he will never contact you. Be smart.” She pats my cheek. “Now, your father is waiting for me outside, we’re going home, hoping Luke didn’t destroy the whole house. You need to talk to your children. We need to tell Salomé as well. Take some time and think about it. I highly recommend you leave now, and let Adam take care of his mother. It’s not your place to be here.” My mother is right, but again, when isn’t she? Her hippie ways might get on my nerves most of the time, but there is nobody with more wisdom than her.

  Turning my back to them, I send one last glance over my shoulder to the life that could have been mine, wondering if I really want to be part of theirs now.

  28

  Now - Alane

  “Didn’t I tell you it would end up the same way as last time?” Dear God, please give me the strength to forgive those who trespass against me.

  “You should know better than to try to be a Gritt. Seriously, you were never a good match.” Lead me not into temptation but deliver me from evil.

  “I mean, you were that desperate to get him to marry you that you had a kid? Seriously. I thought you were a virgin when you left for your bullshit hockey camp. And almost thirty years later, tadaaaa, you bring a son into the picture after Aaron already rejected you once?” Forgive me my trespassing.

  “Patricia, shut the fuck up. Seriously! For once, don’t speak. Don’t be the bitch who wanted my boyfriend so much that she broke us up. Don’t be the harpy sharing my private issues with your family, the staff or the whole freaking town or the vixen trying to fuck any Gritt male. Just let me be. I didn’t ask for your opinion, and I’m fine by myself. Fuck off.”

  “Well, I’m sorry, but Aaron asked me here to comfort him. He didn’t ask you, but me, so I’m not the one leaving!”

  “Patricia, if you don’t let me pass, I swear to God, I will publish a list of all the married men you’ve slept with in this town, and you will be forced to run away. I will also make a list of all the students you’ve harassed trying to get their father’s in bed, and finally, I will knock your teeth out. Let. Me. Pass.” I shove her slightly so I can make my way to the restaurant, trying not to make a scene in front of the Gritt Your Plate’s staff. I need to talk to Aaron. I won’t leave without saying goodbye.

  My mother has been admitted to an Alzheimer’s residence that my ex found in Phoenix, and even if my relationship with him is done, even if I lost most of my friends.

  I’ve built my life there for years, and my son lives there too, so it’s time to go home. I spoke with the principal of the school where I taught for years, and he’ll be happy to have me back. I’m taking my mother with me, so I won’t feel guilty leaving her behind, but she’d be glad to never have to see me again. Now that her condition has worsened, she’s talking to me about the disappointment and embarrassment I was when I got pregnant, as if I was her confidant.

  It’s not sitting well with me, but it’s nothing new.

  Adam doesn’t know what he wants to do.

  He spent some time with the Gritts, but I’m not sure if he spent that time with Aaron, or just Bella and Ridge.

  I’m not touching this with a ten-foot pole.

  He’s an adult, and I won’t get between him and Aaron. I’m here today because Aaron helped me find myself again, and even if I’m flying twenty-five hundred miles away, I owe him one last truth. I’m going to miss him, and I’m genuinely sorry for never telling him who he was to Adam.

  We had our fun, but if he can’t forgive me, then so be it. And if he actually asked Patricia to console him, then all that I knew about him was wrong, and he’s not half the man I thought he was.

  “I’m sorry, ma’am, the restaurant is not open yet.” A young waiter stops me on my mission.

  “I know. I just need to speak to Mr. Gritt. I’ll be quick. Can you please tell me where I can find him?”

  “Oh, well…” He seems constipated, and I’m not sure if it’s because he doesn’t know where Aaron is or if it’s because he’s scared to death of his boss. “Let me see what I can do, Chef Gritt has company, and I’m not sure we can bother him. May I ask your name?”

  “Alane Smith.” But that might not grant me access. “Just tell him it’s important.” The waiter disappears behind the kitchen doors, and I take a few minutes to enjoy my surroundings. I was too nervous the first time I came here to really look around, and the darkness of the night didn’t do it justice.

  The restaurant is located in a twenty-foot high greenhouse, surrounded by plants with outdoor light coming from everywhere. Huge dark tubular heating ducts seem to fall from the sky with thousands of string-lights hanging from them, giving it the impression of being in an enchanted forest about to taste the best meal you’ll ever have. The kitchen sits back, closed by two industrial doors that allow Aaron the privacy he needs. It’s a beautiful place, and it shows me again that I can’t regret keeping Adam as a secret.

  He would have never been the man he is today if we had gotten married after knowing I was pregnant. Because the Aaron I know, would have done what was right. He would have found a job and married me. He would have renounced his dream for Adam and me.

  “I demand to see Chef Aaron,” Patricia’s annoying voice beams behind me. As my nails dig into my palms, I try to remember the names of some of her conquests for the list I promised her I’d write. “Mrs. Smith is not welcome here; you should know that.” She continues huffing.

  I’m about to punch her in the throat when Aaron appears, followed by his whole family. When I say the whole family, I mean, his parents, Luke, Barn, Salomé and Dex. Thank God his kids are at school and Adam’s back on his book tour in New York. He’ll be back in two days, and we’ll fly together from Burlington. I didn’t need the whole tribe there for my apology, but if it’s what I have to do, that’s what I’ll do.

  “What are you doing here?” Aaron snarls, looking at me.

  “Look, Aar, I’m sorry. I just needed to…”

  “I’m not talking to you, Alane.” Turning his attention fully to Patricia, he says, “Get the fuck out!”

  “But, Aaron, you need me to help you deal with what she’s putting you through.” Patricia is pointing at me with her red-manicured nail. I want to shove it up her ass. Before I do so, Salomé barks like a seal. I widen my eyes in shock at the same instant as Luke, Barnabas, Dex and Mr. and Mrs. Gritt laugh, clearly all of them are aware of the noises Patricia makes when she comes.

  “Patricia,” Aaron scowls, “you and I, or Barnabas and you, will never happen. And please don’t think of getting anywhere with Adam, Lawson or my Dad. It’s pathetic and borderline psychotic. Just leave us alone.”

  “But, I love you. All I ever did was for you.”

  “I thought you loved me,” Barnabas mocks her.

  “Or me,” Luke adds.

  “Shit, should I be upset you never loved me,” Mr. Gritt snickers.

  I didn’t know the Gritts could be so nasty, but I don’t feel sorry for Patricia.

  I don’t care.

  She leaves angry, certainly already plotting her revenge, but I’m pretty sure this time, her brother won’t be able to save her reputation at the school.

  Some of Aaron’s staff members are parents of students, and they seemed happy that the principa
l has been put in her place. The gossip mill is certainly already going strong, seeing as how they all have their faces on their phones. Aaron clears his throat, and his employees scatter around the restaurant.

  Feeling my bravery leaving me, I retreat well aware of the fourteen eyes scrutinizing me.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to interrupt a family lunch. I’ll come back later,” I mutter timidly.

  “Let me walk you out, Captain. Babe, come with us?” Luke and Dex walk my way.

  I glance towards Aaron, but he’s already showing me his back, not ready to hear what I came to say. Barnabas winks and shrugs, Mr. and Mrs. Gritt smile softly, and Salomé just stares, as she always did around me.

  I sigh, my attempt at saying goodbye and apologizing having failed, I have no other option than to try again tomorrow, if I have the time to.

  Once outside, I make my way to my car, not expecting Luke to talk to me. I don’t deserve it, after all. He falls into step with me, a smirk on his face.

  “Adam is a good kid,” Luke says with a smile in his voice.

  “He is. Did you talk to him?” I smile.

  “Briefly. We ran into him in town and went for coffee.” He pauses briefly. “You could have told me, Captain. Maybe you couldn’t say anything when we were kids, but you could have told me now.” I don’t hear reproach in his voice, only facts. He’s right, I could have, but I didn’t. I stare off into nothing; sadly thinking of the trajectory my story with Aaron has taken.

  “I wanted to tell Aaron first. Then I would have told Adam. Everything between Aaron and I went too fast and too far since we saw each other again. I don’t even know what we had. Maybe we tried to revive too much of what we were and didn’t accept who we had become. We skipped steps, fucked hard, found closure without resolution. We both fucked up in our story, I can’t carry all the blame.” He nods in understanding, walking beside me. Bringing Dex’s hand to his mouth, he kisses his boyfriend’s knuckles.

  “I’m proud of you for not trying to fix it, babe,” he tells his beau.

  “It was hard, beardy, but I was sure you would have gotten crazy on my ass if I did.” Dex looks at him with adoration.

  “And since when is that a problem?” Luke chuckles before Dex shoves him with his shoulder, and with a firm look but a sneer on his lips. Fuck, these two are adorable. That’s what I almost had with Aaron, what I never got with Mark, what I wish I had for forever. I’m filled with profound melancholy at the idea of leaving Aaron behind and never seeing Luke ever again.

  “I’m going back to Phoenix in two days. I came to say goodbye and apologize. I know it’s hard to forgive me, but I would prefer not to wait another twenty-five plus years to talk to you again. Maybe I can visit you in LA, or we can meet in Vegas? Anyway, send me a text when you’re on the west coast, okay?” Luke is studying me under his lashes like he used to when he was analyzing my every movement on the ice before I was Aaron’s girlfriend.

  “Do you love him?” he jerks his head in the restaurant’s direction.

  “I don’t think I ever stopped.” Luke raises an eyebrow, waiting for me to go on. Dex seems bored out of his mind, waiting patiently for me to pour my heart out. “I could never forget him. When I was looking for peace, he was always my favorite safe haven, still is. He’s the one I never got over, and never will, no matter how long it’s been.”

  “He’s going to have a hard time forgiving you. You know that, right? I know I would.” Luke is nodding, agreeing with Dex.

  “I know,” I exclaim. “But would he be where is today if he had known? Would he have Hailey and Lawson? Would we still be together? We’ll never know.

  Nevertheless, I can’t regret anything, and he shouldn’t either. Luke, I hope you are able to become close with Adam. You’re right, he’s a good person, and he has your talent for drawing. Once you get to know him, you’ll see he’s a Gritt through and through. As for Aaron, I’ll always love him, but I can’t force him to love me or to want me. That’s what put us in this whole situation. I’ll try to come by tomorrow, but I have to pack my mother’s house and get her ready to go to Phoenix, which she doesn’t want to do. She’s been difficult, and I can’t do it alone. Adam said he would help. My ex said he would be there for me. I know it will trigger my anxiety. I can’t stay here. I never could without him. I’ll try to reach out again, but if I have no time, it means it wasn’t meant to be. Maybe we were never meant to end up together.”

  “Or maybe you will. You need to have faith, Alane,” Dex adds, smiling at me. “You need to have faith.”

  29

  Now - Aaron

  Nostrils flaring, blade in hand, I dice the shit out of an onion after having taken the knife out of the assistant cook’s hand. The idiot has no idea what he’s doing.

  “It’s not difficult, for fuck’s sake. Cut off the top and discard, slice onion in half vertically, peel off the skin, hold the root and leave it intact while you cut vertical slices, then chop horizontally, discarding the root end. Didn’t they teach you anything at school, or the diner you worked at before?”

  I throw the knife into the sink, startling half of the staff.

  “Is his wife back?” someone whispers behind me.

  My vision gets clouded.

  My pulse races.

  “Whoever said that will be fired. Now go back to work and shut the fuck up!” I storm out of the kitchen and go sit in my office like I’ve done over the past month now, to deal with paperwork, and try to focus on anything but the picture of Adam’s arrival at the Health Center.

  His smile, livid-blue eyes, stature, facial traits and expressions; Adam is a carbon copy of me. Totally freaks me out. My mother can’t stop going on about it and how he reminds her of me when I was his age. Which is bullshit because when I turned twenty-seven, Jess was pregnant with Hailey. I wasn’t an up and coming author enjoying my newfound celebrity status. I was a neurotic father-to-be, working hard to put money aside for financial security and dreaming of opening my restaurant one day. I barely had time to see my wife, and she was letting me know every time she could, that my behavior had to change. I was doing my best to please her, run the Harbor diner and help my parents. I wasn’t FaceTiming with my brand-new family, getting to know them or traveling to LA to spend time with my cool uncle. The only one Adam seemed to ignore, is me. Not that I tried to reach out, but seeing how he speaks to my parents once a week and texts Barn and Lawson regularly, I was hoping he would like to get to know me. Feeling my body tensing again, the migraine I expect daily comes back, announcing the end of my workday.

  “Chef Gritt, do you have a minute?” My second-in-command peeks his head through the door, testing the waters for my mood. Rubbing my fingers on my temples, I nod my head for him to come in. “What is it?”

  “We need to go over the specials for next week. I know you don’t want to be bothered, but it can’t wait any longer.” I nod, closing my eyes, trying to forget about my migraine.

  “But first… I wanted to ask you if you needed to talk to me about Jess or someone else? I mean, we’ve worked together for a long time, Aaron, and you’re not quite yourself.”

  Jacob and I have indeed been working together for a long time, and he has learned to work around my mood. We’re not friends, more colleagues who hang out from time-to-time, but he knows how to deal with me. He’s married, has two children, and our girls are friends, or they were before a boy got in the middle. We try not to get involved in their on and off friendship. I send him a pointed look, not in the mood to discuss my private life.

  “Okay… But please, whatever is happening, be nice, or at least try to be nicer. Two waiters, the commis and the assistant you yelled at today cried this week, and it takes us all a lot of time afterward to calm them down so they can complete their tasks.”

  I grunt. “Don’t make the staff cry. Noted.”

  “So, for the specials next week, what do you want to do? I was thinking fish tacos and Chinese chicken salad for lunch and for d
inner Lollipop lamb and Prince Edward Island mussels. The recipes are here,” he dumps a few papers on my desk, “and I need your approval by tonight at the latest.”

  “Can’t you take charge as if I was traveling?” He shakes his head.

  “Oh no. Whatever is happening, you’re here, so you’re in charge. Seeing how anything can trigger your temper, I’m not taking responsibility and having you breathe fire down my neck afterward, or firing me because you were not in the mood to eat freaking mussels.”

  Rubbing my palms in my eyes, I sigh. “Give me a minute, and I’ll look over it. I’m sorry. I just have a lot on my mind and not much patience these days.”

  “You don’t say.” He laughs. “It’s alright, just try not to be such a dick all the time, or we won’t have any staff left soon.”

  “I know. I’m sorry. I just…”

  “Have a lot on your mind. Got it, boss. As for your ‘new’ son,” he mimics the quote to the word son, “text him, and tell him you want to talk to him. Clear this shit up, and you’ll see your migraines will disappear. Doctor’s order.” I smile at my giant of a sous-chef, towering above me. The gossip mill of Springs Falls has indeed been turning night and day, so I'm not surprised Jacob knows what’s on my mind.

  “The recipes look good. I trust you.”

  He nods. “Great, so I’ll let you brood or whatever you were doing when I interrupted you, and I’ll catch you later.” As he opens the door, I stop him.

  “Thank you, Jacob. I guess I’ll follow your advice.” Smiling, my sous-chef walks back toward the kitchen.

  “Margaret, bring some ibuprofen and a glass of water to the boss, and do not get on his nerves. Let’s move, people! We’re opening in one hour!”