Remember the Knight

by Thomas, Carrie Lynn

  I haven’t met a boyfriend’s family—well supposed boyfriend’s family, since that night. And even though I know it’s all pretend, that there is no future where Lucas and I are anything more than friends, I still find myself with my hands in my lap, quietly playing with my fingers. “We’re eating on the special plates.” Lucas whispers to me just before his mom begins to pile the table with more food than four people can possibly eat. She putters back and forth from the kitchen as if she’s serving a queen, and I’m not exactly sure who’s more nervous—her or me. I can’t help but compare her to Hunter’s mom who prefers the nail salon far more than the kitchen and is much more talkative and friendly. Lucas’ mom is quiet and while welcoming, I wouldn’t call her friendly. But there’s a deep strength in her—the way she lost one son and she presses on for her family. And the way she’s brought out the fancy plates for dinner with a girl who may break his son’s heart or take him away from her. She’s already lost so much, and I’m overwhelmed with the urge to go hug her. Not that I’m sure it would help.

  Lucas’ dad seems oblivious to the heavy air surrounding us. He takes large bites of food—juicy chicken breasts and thick homemade mashed potatoes slathered in butter, grunting with each bite. He smiles at his wife. “Dinner is amazing,” he tells her. She barely stops to smile back.

  He glances at my direction. “So, Sage,” he says. “Lucas says your dad’s an airline pilot?”

  “Yes.” I shift in my seat. Sitting in this modest older home in the northern reaches of the United States, miles away from the warmth and sunshine of my spacious home sits in my stomach like a heavy brick. It’s strange to be embarrassed at my father’s job, I’ve always been so proud of him.

  “Does that mean you fly for free?” Lucas’ father asks.

  “James,” his mother interrupts. “That’s rude.” She sets a bowl of rolls on the table. How much food did she make?

  “No, it’s okay,” I say. “Not exactly. We get family passes, but they still cost money. And then we fly stand-by which means we only get to fly if there is a seat available—which rarely happens. You can end up spending hours an airport, running from gate to gate trying to catch a flight. So, Dad usually just buys a regular ticket when I go home for breaks and stuff.”

  I take a bite of one of the rolls. They taste homemade.

  “Must be nice,” Lucas’ mom says, finally sitting down at the chair across from me. “Being so rich and all. Our house is probably nothing you’re used to.”

  “Mom,” Lucas says. “Sage isn’t like that.”

  “It’s okay,” I say. “Really your house is lovely. And I love this town. It’s so…quaint.”

  Her eyes narrow and she presses her lips together. “Quaint? Funny. That’s what the tourists call it.”

  Heat rises in my cheeks. “Quaint in a good way, I mean. It must be nice to know everyone. Like one big happy family. Phoenix is much too big—we barely know our neighbors.”

  After dinner, I offer to help with the dishes and her face brightens into a smile. A real smile, not this fake happy clown-like grin she plastered on her face for most of the evening. “That’s kind of you,” she says, the lines around her eyes crinkling. “Why don’t you go hang out with Lucas, though. You’re a guest.”

  “Thank you. And thanks for dinner. It was very good. I’ve never tasted better mashed potatoes. And I honestly don’t even like mashed potatoes, but yours—well you’re turning me into a fan.”

  “Really?” There’s the genuine smile again.

  “Really. Cross my heart.”

  Her eyes drift across the kitchen to the dining room where Lucas and his father were caught up in a conversation. “Don’t hurt him.” She turns back to the dishes.

  Lucas gets up from the table when I walk in. “Where have you been? Mario Kart?” he asks. “Do you want to play?”

  “Of course.” I follow him to his room, grabbing the controller he hands me before plopping down in one of the green bean bag chairs in the front of his television. “You know that’s the second reason I came here…the first being to help make Brianna jealous.”

  “You’re a strange girl.” Lucas rubs his nose. “I know you came here to see the beach. You should’ve seen yourself today…practically skipping down the shoreline. I’ve never seen you so happy, before. It’s kind of weird, an Arizona girl so obsessed with some big lake. Aren’t you closer to the ocean? Now that’s big.”

  “Well, yes, seeing the lake is one of my reasons for coming here. But it’s more like reason four or five. As for why I like it so much…well maybe I’m not a fan of salt. And sharks and whales and jellyfish. And do you know how deep the ocean is?”

  “Okay, okay.” Lucas says turning his eyes to the TV. “Let’s play.”

  I laugh as I manipulate the controller. But my mind drifts to the lake. When I crossed those rocks and found that beach, I knew more than anything, I was home. The dreams were real, there isn’t any other explanation. They were real. Maybe there’s a parallel universe out there where I’m living with Adam and we’re on this beach or something.

  I don’t know. But I do know I’ve been here. I do know that beach has meaning. I do know that Adam means something.

  There’s a tiny catch in my throat when his name crosses through my mind. Adam. He’s not here, and now I’ll never know if he has these dreams…these feelings like me. It’s apparent Lucas doesn’t, but there was a part of me hoping that Adam would have the answers.

  But he’s not here. I sigh and try to turn it into a yawn. I’ve been a terrible Mario Kart player and Lucas is kicking my butt even more than usual. “I think I’m tired. I concede. Too much fresh air today.”

  “Yeah, me too.” He yawns too, covering his mouth with his hand. “I’ll say goodnight and let you get some sleep. The bathroom’s down the hall. Do you need anything?”

  “I feel bad taking your bed from you.” I frown at the cozy plump comforter on his bed. The couch in their living had to be thirty years old and very uncomfortable.

  “Nah,” he says. “It’s okay. The couch isn’t as bad as it looks. And my mom would never forgive me if I gave you the couch. She believes in being chivalrous and all that.”

  “I don’t need chivalry.”

  “Well, my mom does, and I do tend to agree with her. Girlfriend or not.” He pauses and yawns again. “Sage,” he asks. “Is everything okay? I mean we haven’t known each other that long, but you’ve been looking so sad lately and I’m just…I want you to know that I consider you my friend. I know we’re here to make Brianna jealous, but I’m still here for you too.”

  “It amazes me how ridiculous you can be one moment and how sweet you can be the next.” I hold up my hand. “But before it makes your head too big.” He’s raising his eyebrows repeatedly, “I want to say thank you. But I am fine.” He’s still wiggling his eyebrows. “Go to bed, Lucas.” I lean into him to push him out the door. I grab his arm just as he turns, and he looks back at me. I whisper faintly into his ear. “She still loves you.”

  “I wish,” he replies and slides out of the room.

  My bag waits for me on the bed, and I zip through it, pulling out my toothbrush and pajamas. Zipping up my bag, I turn for the door, stopping in front of the bulletin board. I clutch the edge of Lucas’ desk, leaning into the pictures, my eyes immediately drawn to Adam’s. It’s so familiar. Like I’ve seen his smile thousands of times and not just in dreams, like I can trace every line on his face, hear his voice, feel his heartbeat. I know just when his dimple would appear and what his laugh sounds like. I know how his hair blows in the breeze and how his hand feels in mine. I know it—I know this picture. I stare so hard that another person appears in the picture…a young girl with them, in a purple bathing suit with blue flowers. She leans into Adam, the freckles dancing across her nose. Her smile is bright, shimmering in the sunlight. My breath stops, because it’s like looking into a mirror. I reach for the picture and she blurs, fading until it’s just Lucas and Adam again. />
  But that’s not what matters. Her clothes, her age…it doesn’t matter.

  Because I recognize the girl.

  She’s me.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Adam

  “Way to go, Mr. Clumsy.” Zane meets me in the driveway. “Breaking your mom’s glass? What was that all about?”

  I glare at him as I walk by. The trash bag of the shards I’d swept up from the kitchen gripped in my hand. I open the trash can, dropping the bag inside and turn back to the house. “What are you doing? Spying on me?”

  “Well, I needed something to do while I was waiting for your ass.” He leans back against the truck. “You were taking forever up there.”

  “Well yeah, I broke a glass. I wasn’t going to leave my mom to deal with my mess. Unlike some people I know.” I say the last part under my breath, but Zane hears every word.

  “And what exactly is that supposed to mean?” His jaw clenches and he tilts his head to the side. “What mess of mine have I left you to clean up, anyway?”

  “Do I need to make a list?” I arch an eyebrow. “It’s going to take a long time though.”

  Zane’s eyes harden and he holds out his hands. “Fine. Tell me. What did I do that was so bad to you? What did I do? All I’ve done and all I’ve ever done was to protect you—from the time you were born I swore I’d protect you with my life. And guess what, I even did that or do you forget so easily? Forgive me that I didn’t let you play Sage’s savior and forgive me that I actually didn’t die, but I did it all for you. I’ve always done it all for you.” He’s nearly screaming now, and I glance back at the house to see several lights flipping on. My mom hears. She hears and she’s going to be down here any second. I grab Vin’s ring and clutch my arm around Zane and think of the beach.

  As the light fades and I double over to catch my breath, Zane laughs. “Of course, this is where you would go, isn’t it? I take it Sage is what’s causing you to act like you’ve got a stick up your butt, yet again.” He shivers. “Not the warmest place we could’ve gone.”

  I ignore him. “I never got why we had to use the Nexus to travel. These rings are so much easier.” I turn Vin’s ring over in my hand. “It just doesn’t make sense—the transporter crap and stuff.”

  Zane eyes me funnily. “It would if you actually thought about it, it would make sense.” He shivers again. “Now let’s go someplace warm. Like the diner. Coffee, food. Yeah, sounds nice. It’s cold here and windy and dark and…”

  “Shut up,” I scream. “Unless you’re going to tell me what I should be thinking of. Do that and we can go, and you can eat your eggs and whatever else you have to shovel down your throat.”

  “Well.” He holds out his hands. “Calm down first and I’ll tell you.”

  “Me calm down?” I arch a brow. “You were the one yelling so loud I had to bring us here before my mom overheard.”

  “Touché, little brother.” He tilts his head. “Now here’s the deal. Vin does not like my mother and feels that she’s making Laris all soft and crap. So, Vin convinces Arch and Zarek to off my mom, me, and my little sister figuring it’ll send Laris into some crazy rage against the Nexians. Because you know he’ll blame the Nexians. A Perseidian and Nexian war here just like back at home. Perseidians win of course after making the Nexians go boom.” He opens his hands to imitate an explosion. “Although I’m not sure how well Vin thought that one through because killing me meant there was no one to use the Nexus, but whatever.”

  My eyes drift away to what I saw on Vin’s ring and how he knew where Zane was, but let him live. Zane continues. “I believe Vin was worried Laris would see his evil plan through the memories, so he hid his ring, had Dad’s ring stolen. I’m not sure what he did with the remaining ones. So, the only option for Laris was the Nexus or the transporters. Teaching you to travel was a win-win. Nexus basics for you and an easier way for him to travel. Ultimately the Nexus is far more powerful than the rings—it can alter reality and dreams. It can blow things up. It can travel through time.”

  I turn away from him, my eyes lost in the cloudless night of stars. It all seems so meaningless. This world, that world. This beach. I turn back to Zane. “Did you know that’s why Dad created me? To time travel. I guess he suspected it might kill whoever used it and since he didn’t want you to die, he made me. He was going to send me back to save your mother.”

  “Adam,” he says, but I turn away. I turn back to the sky and the stars and—I don’t want to hear what he’s going to say. “Adam.”

  “No,” I say bitterly. “Please don’t tell me you knew all about this. Please don’t.” I cover my ears. “I won’t listen.” Even with my ears closed, I can feel the air shift around me as he comes closer. His arms grab mine yanking them from my ears.

  “Adam, yes I know. I’m not going to lie to you. I know.” I turn to face him, clenching my fists, my face warm, tense, like a cannon ball ready to explode. “But I didn’t know either—not until now. Not until I saw the rings. I swear Adam, I spent my whole life trying to protect you. That’s all I ever wanted. When you were little and when you were first born up until the moment Laris sent me away, you always looked at me like I was the hero of your world. And that was exactly what I wanted to be. Even if you don’t remember.”

  I drop to the ground, curling my hands around my knees, watching the dark lake as it silently sobs, a mixture of water and ice. There’s a cloud marring the stars.

  “She used to tell me,” I say not sure if it’s more to Zane or more to myself. “She used to tell me when she was upset, or lonely, or missed me, that she would come here. She told me about the ice and the wind. About how cold it could be. About how endless the stars are. She came here and thought about me. Just like I’m here now.”

  The ground shifts around me and Zane plops beside me. He lifts my hand up and opens my palm, carefully forcing each finger out. He presses a ring into them. “I don’t have Laris’ ring,” he says. “Or you could see all her memories. But this is Benji’s in case you want to see the truth about mine. And our little road trip is on here. Just promise not to give me any grief on The Redhead, okay?”

  The ground shifts again, and he’s standing, stepping away, his footfalls growing further and further. “Don’t stay up too late,” he hollers. “We got lots to do, lil brother.” There’s a shadow of me as the light explodes from behind.

  Alone, I stare at the ring. Am I ready for this? To see Sage again, the one who loved me. Am I ready?

  Before I can stop myself, I slide the ring over my knuckle and whisper “Gichiwendam.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Sage

  That first year of college, after my parents moved me in, after my mother kissed, after Stella wrapped her arms so tight around me, my dad had to pry her loose. After meeting my roommate, attending freshman orientation, filling out the roommate agreement. After the evening spent with various get-to-know each other, activities, I fell into the upper bunk in my dorm, too tired to think. But the next morning, when I woke up. Something felt wrong. It took me a few moments to remember where I was. This isn’t my room, this isn’t my home, my family is not here.

  Waking up snuggled under a plaid comforter surrounded by blue walls gives me that same disorientated feeling. This isn’t my room, this isn’t my home, and... Adam is not here. The missing piece of my dream is not here. I found Lucas, I found the beach, but Adam. Is he really the boy with the blue eyes? I hate leaving Star Harbor and not knowing.

  I rub my eyes as I sit up. Sunlight is streaming into the window. I yawn just as someone knocks on the door.

  “Are you decent?” Lucas asks. I glance at my flannel pajamas covered in yellow ducks. Stella picked them out for me on one of my trips home. She has a matching pair.

  “I guess,” I say.

  Lucas opens the door. “Wake up sunshine,” he says. “Get dressed. We can go to the diner for breakfast. They have the best breakfast.”

  “Okay, okay. Can I shower first
?”

  “Yeah,” he hesitates, his hand gripping the door handle. “You’re not one of those girls who spends hours on makeup or something. Because I’m kind of hungry.”

  “No. That’s my little sister. She even does my makeup for me.”

  “Good,” he says. “You don’t need the makeup, but you might want to at least do something about your hair” I pout and toss a pillow at him. However, when I get to the bathroom and actually look in a mirror, I can see that he’s right.

  It takes about twenty minutes to shower, dress, and brush my teeth. I’m used to sleeping in until the last moment I can before classes. I’m definitely a night person.

  Lucas is waiting for me, by the door. We wave goodbye to his mom before heading out the door and climbing into his car.

  “So, what’s so good about the diner?”

  “I don’t know. Just trust me, it’s better than my mom’s burnt pancakes. She’s not the greatest at pancakes.”

  “Well, the chicken she made last night was—”

  “She can make a fabulous casserole or roast a turkey or bake a pie. Just don’t ask her to make breakfast.”

  The diner’s pretty busy when we walk in about ten minutes later. Liz waves at Lucas, but it’s another waitress who seats us. She’s younger, with dark hair and freckles and a bounce in her step. She leads us to a booth in the back.