Caught Me Dreaming 2

by Sophia Jenkins

  Neeci left me at the club looking stupid. I was gonna take the bus, but my dude Jah was in there tryna scoop some college girls, so I asked him to gimme a ride to the crib. When I got home, I thought about walking over to Neeci’s spot to talk to her, but I knew I should probably give her a lil’ space. I know she’s still mad at me. I mean, I don’t know how all this shit looks. She probably went all the way back to the first time I fucked her over and decided she was right about me. She ain’t though. I don’t know. Maybe I should just be by myself. I got a lotta shit to think about. I might really be a father. Damn.

  I had a bad night of rest. I was having all kinds of wacked-out dreams, tossing and turning, thinking about all this shit. In my mind, I’m sure I ain’t that kid’s father, but it’s possible, and the shit is fucking with me. I barely pay attention, as I stumble around my apartment, getting ready for work. Then I remember I gotta take the bus to work, so I hurry out the door.

  When I get down to the stop, the bus is taking off, so I have to run after it a lil’ bit.

  This fucking day is already shaping up to be a shit show.

  I get on the bus and look around for a seat. The only one open is next to some chick tryna give me eyes. I can’t imagine why, because I know I look like shit; I’m exhausted, I ain’t shaved my face, and my bald head is probably starting to get spotty too. I ignore ol’ girl and just stand up. I ain’t in the mood for that flirting shit this morning. I’m just tryna get to work. Then I think about seeing Neeci and my stomach turns over. This shit’s gonna be awkward as fuck.

  I get off the bus across the street from the Coffee Cat and slowly walk in. Part of me hopes Neeci hasn’t made it in yet, but another part wants to see her. As I open the door and walk in, the first thing I see is Neeci handing a customer a coffee at the register. Damn! And she looks better than a motherfucka, too. She smiles at the customer, then she sees me and the smile fades. I just try to walk through, all casual and shit, like there ain’t nothing wrong. When I get to where she’s standing, she’s all business

  “Hello,” she says.

  “Hey,” I reply, and keep walking. If that’s how she wanna play it, cool.

  We’re short today because for whatever reason a bunch of waiters and waitresses called off, so I not only have to prepare food, but also help serve. That means I gotta walk past Neeci all day. Every time I come back, I look at her. At first, she just looks at me like it’s nothing. Then, she rolls her eyes at me. I try to play it off and just keep going like I didn’t see it.

  When it’s time for her to go on lunch, she walks back to sit at the counter. She puts her order in, and I pick it up to give it to her. She snatches it out of my hand and starts eating it. That’s it.

  “So, you’re just gonna be shitty to me all day?” I ask.

  “Yep.”

  “Damn, Neeci! Stop being like that.”

  “Don’t tell me how to be, Sha’quan. I know you’re probably a father now, but you ain’t mine.”

  That shit stung. That wasn’t even called for.

  We start going back and forth, taking jabs at each other. The whole time I’m thinking how sexy her angry face is, but I keep going.

  We make a lil’ commotion, so Nikki comes up and says, “Hey, stop that! We’ve already been through this. Now if you two can’t be professional, then I’m gonna have to get rid of both of you. Is that clear?”

  Neeci grinds her jaw and says, “Yes.”

  I just nod.

  “We have some people coming in,” Nikki says, “so why don’t you two just call it a day and go deal with whatever this is outside of work. I’ll see you two tomorrow.”

  Nikki walks off towards the back, and Neeci and I just look at each other for a minute.

  “Look,” I say, “I’ll pack your food up for you, and we can go and talk, okay?”

  “Fine,” Neeci replies, still pissed.

  I go back in the kitchen to put her food in a to-go container and tell everybody I’m gone for the day. When I walk back out, Neeci is gone. I walk out to see where she is, and she’s pulling the car up to the curb. I go out and get in, but neither of us says anything as she drives. She puts some music on and turns it up, which is cool with me because I’m still tryna decide what Imma say to her. How I’m supposed to convince her I ain’t doing shit? I don’t even know.

  We pull up to my apartment building. Neeci cuts the engine and gets out. Cool, it’s better if we’re at my spot. At least I’ll have the comfort of my space.

  I grab her food and get out to unlock the gate. We walk up to my apartment, and I open the door and let her in. She walks in and flops down on my couch.

  I hand her the container of food, and then I put down my apron and shit. I walk back, and she’s still just holding onto the container. I go and sit down on the chair next to the couch, so I can face her.

  I’m still tryna decide what to say. Before I can say anything, she goes, “Look Sha’quan, we have to work together, and I need us to be able to do that.”

  “That’s all you wanna do?” I say. “Work together?”

  “Sha’quan, I got enough going on without having to deal with your shit.”

  “Neeci, I promise you, there ain’t nothin’ going on with me and that girl. I told you I had a past, and she’s a part of it. I really don’t believe that the kid is mine. I just don’t.”

  “And what if it is?”

  “It’s not.”

  “But what if it is, Sha’quan.”

  I hesitate. “Well, then I gotta take care of him.”

  “See, I’m not tryna deal with all this.”

  “That don’t affect you and me though.”

  “How doesn’t it?”

  “We’re still gonna be us regardless.”

  “But what about Jaynie?”

  “I ain’t worried about that girl. Ain’t nothing between us. There never really was. I’ll go to court, set up an agreement, and I’ll barely have to deal with her. Just when I go pick up the kid. But that’s if he’s mines though.”

  Neeci doesn’t say anything. She opens up her container and starts nibbling at her food. I sit there watching her for a while, then I lean forward and take her hand.

  “C’mon Neeci,” I say. “You know you want this. We had a good thing going. Don’t let this mess it up.”

  “Sha’quan, I just don’t know.”

  “You don’t miss me?”

  “It ain’t even been that long.”

  “But still you ain’t miss me? Because I missed you.”

  She pauses, then looks up in my eyes and mumbles, “Yeah, I missed you.”

  “See…”

  “But this shit is crazy. I can’t be dealing with no ifs. We need to know, once and for all, if that’s your baby or not. You need to get a DNA test.”

  “Damn, you’re right.”

  “So why don’t you call ol’ girl and ask her for one?”

  “You gonna talk to her with me?”

  “I don’t know, Sha’quan.”

  “C’mon. Please? For me?”

  She takes a deep breath, then goes, “Okay, Sha’quan. But there better not be any shit.”

  “It’s cool, Imma call her over here now, so we can get this handled.”

  I reach for my phone and look through to see if I still even have this girl’s number. It’s still in there, so I go ahead and call her. I don’t even do no chit-chat. I get straight to the point and say she needs to come by my place, so we can talk.

  Neeci eats her food, and I turn the TV on while we wait. When I hear the buzzer, I turn the TV back off and get up to answer it. I open my door and wait for Jaynie, so I can let her in.

  She comes waltzing in. She didn’t bring the baby, which is cool cause I’m not ready to deal with that yet, not until I know for sure.

  I tell her to take a seat, and she pauses when she sees Neeci sitting there. She looks back at me, all confused and shit, but I just go around her and sit down.

  She slowly walks to th
e other chair and sits down. Neeci is just sitting there, quiet, with her arms crossed.

  Jaynie shoots Neeci a dry, “Hey”, and Neeci shoots it right back.

  I decide it’s best to just get straight to it, so we can get this over with.

  “Aight Jaynie,” I begin. “You came thru talking about how that’s my baby, but that ain’t good enough. Imma need a paternity test before I go any further. I’m not just gonna take your word for it, especially because I don’t really think it’s mine.”

  “So, you want a test, huh?”

  “Yep. That’s the only way I’m getting involved.”

  “So, if I get the test, you’re gonna take care of the baby?”

  “If it’s mines.”

  “Mhmm, well, we can take the test, but first I gotta know that there ain’t gonna be no problems. If you’re gonna be in my baby’s life, Imma need to deal with you and only you. Your girl ain’t gonna be coming between us, causing problems.”

  I look over at Neeci, and her eyebrows shoot up. Her foot starts shaking, like she trying not to hurt this girl.

  “Hold up,” I say. “There ain’t gonna be none of that shit. Imma deal with things the way Imma deal with things. Even if this is my baby, that don’t give you no right to tell me what to do and how to do it. Now, this my girl, and if the baby’s gonna be with me then she’s gonna be involved, and you’re just gonna have to deal with it.”

  Jaynie jumps up. “I ain’t gotta deal with shit! This is about me and you, not her.”

  “There ain’t no me and you. If Imma take care of the baby, then that’s that, but me and you ain’t gonna be dealing with each other. Imma get my kid, and that’s gonna be it. Don’t think that shit’s gonna mean we’re getting married or something. You can forget that shit.”

  “Whatever, Sha’quan! I ain’t getting no test until you promise me shit’s gonna run smooth. If you decide that’s the way, it’s gonna be then you gimme another call. Until then, there won’t be no test.”

  With that Jaynie, storms out and slams the door. I turn and look at Neeci, and it looks like she was holding her breath tryna not to cuss this bitch out. I’m fucking hot! I don’t even know if this fucking kid is mine, and I’m already dealing with the baby-mama drama. Man, fuck that girl! She wanna be difficult, then I ain’t gotta deal with her ass at all. I stand there breathing hard for a few minutes before turning to Neeci.

  “Can you believe that bitch? Coming in my fucking place talking that bullshit. I don’t even know if that baby’s mine yet, and she’s already tryna tell me what to do. Well fuck her then! I ain’t gotta put up with that shit behind some kid I don’t even know is mine. Probably ain’t no way. She can go put that shit on some other nigga.”

  Neeci calmly gets up and takes my hands. “Calm down, Sha! She’s just tryna push your buttons. How about this? You come to my spot; I’ll make you dinner, and we can sit down and talk about this.”

  This calms me down a lil’ bit, and I agree.

  We go back down to the car and drive over to her place. Then, we go up and into the kitchen and cook together. We make some shrimp alfredo with some garlic bread. It’s the shit from the jar, but it’ll do.

  As we sit down to eat, and I look around and notice the place is empty again.

  “Damn, your cousin really isn’t ever here, huh?”

  “Nope. She comes in to grab a few things, but other than that she’s only really here when she’s mad at her boyfriend. I saw her this morning getting some stuff to go.”

  “Oh, okay. Man, this shit is wild. I can’t believe Jaynie just came at me like that.”

  “Yeah, that was messed up, but you know she ain’t just gonna leave you alone, right?”

  “Yeah. Her crazy ass is gonna keep being a pain in the ass until I take care of that baby.”

  “You just need to go ahead and take the test.”

  “But what about that shit she said?”

  “Just tell her whatever, so you can get the test done. Deal with it after you know the truth.”

  Man, she’s right. I gotta get this fucking test. The shit won’t sit right with me until I know for sure. I just want this shit to be over, but I’m not looking forward to talking to Jaynie again.

  I just finish eating my food and think about it. The shit still has me pissed off though. We get up and clear the table, then Neeci washes the dishes.

  I offer to help, but she says she got it. After she’s done, she dries her hands then comes over and wraps her arms around my neck. She gets on her tiptoes and give me a deep, warm kiss.

  Man, that shit makes me forget all about what’s-her-name.

  The next day I call Jaynie up and tell her whatever, just meet me at the clinic after work. I tell her just know that Neeci’s coming with me. She says whatever, and we get off the phone. Neeci and I go work our shift and then leave to meet up with Jaynie at the clinic. We gotta be back because tonight is Neeci’s night to perform at Coffee Cat again; plus, she gotta another gig to get to after that.

  We shoot over to the clinic, and Jaynie is waiting outside with the baby. As we walk up, she sucks her teeth and rolls her eyes at Neeci. Neeci shoots her a look back and then puts her arm thru mine. Jaynie turns and heads into the clinic, and we follow behind.

  I called ahead to get an appointment to try not to have to wait too long, but we still have to sit down and fill out some paperwork. Neeci and I sit on one side. Jaynie takes the baby and sits across from us. After we fill all the papers out, we go back and sit down to wait. I look down at the baby to try and see if it looks anything like me. It doesn’t—to me at least—but that doesn’t mean shit because it looks just like Jaynie. I cannot wait for this shit to be over, so I can just know already. The nurse finally comes out to get us. Neeci gives me a kiss on the cheek and stays out in the lobby to wait. Jaynie, the baby, and I go in the back to take the test.

  It ain’t anything too major. Just a lil’ prick and it’s pretty much done. They say the results would take like a week, which feels like a long-ass time. As I go to walk back out, Jaynie comes up with the baby, pointing to me saying, “Look Ra Ra, that’s your daddy.”

  I just look at her and then at the baby before turning around and walking out to the lobby.

  Before I make it to the door, Jaynie calls after me, “The truth’s gonna come out, Sha’quan. You’d better be ready for me when it does.”

  I just keep walking and grab Neeci so we can get the fuck up outta there. I’m done with this shit.

  For now.

  Four

  Shanisha

  This whole baby situation is crazy, but at least the test is done. Now we just gotta wait for the results. This shit is about to be fucking terrible. It feels like I’m waiting to hear my future. Like, if this baby really his, am I gonna be able to deal with it? I can’t imagine having to put up with Jaynie’s bullshit. Man, I can’t wait for these results, so at least then I’ll know. Until then, I gotta go back and do my show.

  I gotta try to concentrate.

  We roll back to the Coffee Cat, and I do my set. This one is slightly shorter because I gotta get over to the other club. The audience seems to enjoy it all the same, and I shake a few hands before I rush out the door. The next club is about fifteen or twenty minutes on the other side in Wilson Park, not too far from where we stay in Waverly.

  I ask Sha’quan to drive over there while I try to get myself ready. I make sure my vocals are still on point, as we drive across town. It takes like fifteen minutes to get there, which is cool because I get to scope the place out and look at the setup.

  We struggle to find parking space, so Sha’quan just lets me out in front, and I go in to look around and find the manager.

  The place is pretty small, which is cool because I like to be right there with the crowd to make sure they’re feeling me. I ask one of the waiters where the manager’s at. He points me to a dude standing around, giving direction to security.

  It’s a lil’ dead in here, but whatever. I
get paid either way. Imma still fill this room up with my voice and music. I go ova to the guy and introduce myself.

  “Hi. I’m Shanisha Lee or Neeci,” I say, putting my hand out. “I’m the one you booked to perform tonight.”

  He takes my hand. “Oh, hey Neeci. I see you got here a lil’ early, that’s good. We’re just setting up for the show. It’s just one other act, then you. Wow! You’re beautiful. I thought you were when I talked to you on the phone.”

  He starts smiling at me, tryna get all close and shit, but I pull away before he can put his arm around me. I clear my throat, adjust my body language, and say, “Thank you. What do I need to do?”

  “All work, huh? I like that. We’ll get acquainted later. For now, you can just go around towards the back of the stage. They’ll get you all set up and let you know your cue. I can’t wait to see you perform.”

  I mumble another quick thank you and walk off to where he pointed. I can feel him watching my ass as I walk away. What is with these niggas? I wonder if Sha’quan found a parking space yet. As soon as I get to the back of the stage, the guy says that the other act isn’t there, so Imma have to go on. I’m like cool, I’m ready. I get my mic and everything, and somebody goes up to introduce me.

  I climb onstage, and as soon as I get to the center, I see Sha’quan coming right in front of me. I smile at him and get ready to warm up the crowd. A lot of ‘em ain’t really paying attention, so I gotta wake ‘em up. I go straight in with a crazy note that makes everybody turn to look at me. Then, I go into a few of my songs, straight, back to back to back. I know with crowds like this that you just gotta keep going. I see the dude on the side saying my time is almost up, so I just go into some riffs to show off my voice and skills on the guitar. When I’m done, I get a nice lil’ applause as I leave the stage. Sha’quan comes around to meet me, and I tell him I’m ready to go.

  As we leave out, the manager comes up to me, but slows down when he sees Sha’quan has his hand on my lower back. He looks him over and hits him with a nod before addressing me.