The Lies We Believe

by Dr. Chris Thurman

  For he says to Moses, “I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.”10

  Christianity is about God’s mercy—God offering us salvation and eternity in heaven when we deserved condemnation and eternity in hell. Peter wrote of God’s mercy in his first letter: “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.”11

  Thank God (literally) that He is merciful. Our situation would be worse than bleak for all of us if He wasn’t.

  God Is Sovereign

  Nothing is out of God’s control. The fact that He controls the universe is called sovereignty. It’s the same term one uses to describe a king over his dominion. God is in control and going to bring about His will regardless of what any of us do to get in His way. Consider these verses from a psalm:

  Whatever the LORD pleases He does, In heaven and in earth, In the seas and in all deep places.12

  Nothing can thwart God’s plans. The die has been cast, and God was the One who cast it. God is in control, and everything is headed toward an incredible ending that He scripted. He’s got the whole world in His hands.

  God Is Unchanging

  Have you ever attended a high school reunion? Isn’t it an eye-opening experience? It’s interesting to go back after ten, fifteen, or twenty years to see how people have changed. It’s rather shocking to see the star athlete or head cheerleader at middle age carrying a few extra pounds around and looking a bit worse for wear. And, of course, who could have known back then that the quiet little guy or gal in the back of the room would become the highly respected medical doctor or chief executive officer of a major company? People do change!

  But God stays the same. He doesn’t change. Theologians call this His immutability. God is the same all the time in that He is never inconsistent or growing or developing. His words are recorded in the Old Testament:

  For I am the LORD, I do not change; Therefore you are not consumed, O sons of Jacob.13

  In the New Testament, James wrote about God’s immutability when he said, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”14

  Isn’t it comforting to know that in a world that seems to change minute by minute, God is the same from age to age? We need that kind of stability.

  God Is Love

  I saved the best for last. God loves us. He is incapable of not loving us. Everything He does is for our best and is completely unselfish. Because of His love, He is greatly concerned about us and acts to help us. John put it this way: “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”15

  The best we get here on earth from other people is imperfect love. God loves us perfectly. His love is unconditional. It is constantly aimed at helping us become mature and free. We can count on it. We can’t do a single thing to earn it. His love opens the door to a relationship with Him:

  God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus. . . . For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.16

  I have presented these attributes of God to assist you in seeing God more clearly. Distortions about God cause real damage to emotional health and spiritual life. It’s critically important to know who God really is and how that relates to us as human beings.

  Now, let’s turn our attention to what the Bible says about who we are.

  The Truth About You

  Patty is a hard-driving, anxiety-prone woman in her late thirties. On the outside, she appears to have it all together. She is a smart dresser, carries herself with an air of confidence, and is friendly and helpful to others. But deep down inside Patty is very different from her outward appearance. She is full of self-doubt and insecurity.

  “I’m sure it goes back to my childhood,” she started. “I was overweight, and kids made fun of me unmercifully.”

  “What sorts of memories do you have of growing up?” I asked.

  “Bad memories—painful ones,” she recalled. “I remember being called ‘Fatty Patty’ by the kids. I remember when they chose sides for playground games, I was always last to be picked. I can still see myself asking to be chosen, totally humiliating myself, just to be picked.”

  “Were your parents supportive of you at this time?” I inquired.

  “Yes and no,” Patty responded. “I know Mom and Dad loved me, but they tended to downplay what I was going through. I don’t think they really understood the pain I was experiencing.” She laughed and added, “I can still recall my mom telling me that everything would be all right. Then she would bring me a piece of pie or some cookies and say, ‘Here, eat this. It’ll help make things better.’” Patty began to softly sob into a tissue.

  “It sounds to me like one of the only ways your mom knew how to comfort you was to give you sweets,” I suggested.

  “That’s exactly how it was, Dr. Thurman. She said ‘I love you’ by giving me desserts. She would say how she never had dessert growing up during the Great Depression. She was so proud that she could do that for me. And of course, I would eat every bite.”

  “Please go on with your story.”

  “Well, the main issue is that I still feel the same way today as I did back then. When I went off to college, I lost a lot of weight and began to take real pride in my appearance. I’ve been real disciplined in my diet and exercise. A lot of good things have happened to me in my adult life. But I’m still the little fat girl deep down inside. I feel that I don’t have anything to offer.”

  “Do you really believe that?”

  She paused. “Yes, I’m afraid I really do. I just feel like a big zero—a loser.”

  I can’t begin to estimate how many people I’ve spoken with whose story is similar to Patty’s. The details vary, but the bottom-line self-perception is still the same: I’m a zero. It may be tied to appearance issues, such as being overweight, having crooked teeth, being short, or having too many freckles. It may be tied to achievement issues, such as not getting a college degree, being on the lower rung of the climb to success, or not making enough money. It may be tied to relationship issues, such as being lonely, being rejected by someone, or experiencing inconsistent love from others. Whatever the issue, too many of us have ended up with a distorted perception of who we really are that must be corrected if we hope to enjoy a fuller, healthier life.

  Seeing yourself as you really are is essential to mental and spiritual health. The only way you can see yourself accurately is through the teachings of the Bible. Let me warn you—some of the news is bad. What the Bible says about us sometimes stings badly. Yet for those who turn their lives over to God, the news couldn’t be better. Let’s go into both the good and the bad news about ourselves.

  You Are a Special Creation of God

  One of the “good news” passages concerning who we are is found in Psalm 139. Here King David stated some important truths:

  For you created my inmost being;

  you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

  I praise you because I am fearfully and

  wonderfully made;

  your works are wonderful,

  I know that full well.

  My frame was not hidden from you

  when I was made in the secret place.

  When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

  your eyes saw my unformed body.

  All the days ordained for me 17

  were written in your book

  before one of them came to be.

  God doesn’t make junk! We have all heard that before, but it is really true. His works are wonderful, and we are the ape
x of all His works! No one needs to walk around thinking he is “a zero” because God doesn’t make “zeros.”

  Not only are we “fearfully and wonderfully made,” but I believe this passage teaches that God made each of us a unique individual. Though we human beings are alike in many ways, no one else is exactly like us, either. As trite as it sounds, when God made you, He broke the mold.

  You may be thinking, Thank goodness no one else is like me—I’m such a loser, but the truth of the matter is that you are a very special creation of God and there is no duplicate. In a world where too many things have a look of sameness, it is worth feeling good about the fact that God created you to be the only you on the planet.

  You Are Adam’s Offspring

  Now, for some really bad news. According to the Bible, each person is born corrupt. When Adam and Eve committed the original (first) sin, it devastated everything and has negatively impacted all mankind since then. We are all born with a sinful nature. David put it this way: “Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.”18

  So, the horrible truth of it is that we are not basically “good.” We are basically “bad” in that we are bent in the direction of sin from birth. Adam and Eve messed it up for all of us, and things have been a fractured mess here on earth ever since. The Westminster Confession says it so much more articulately than I can:

  By this sin they fell from their original righteousness and communion with God, and so became dead in sin, and wholly defiled in all the parts and faculties of soul and body. They being the root of all mankind, the guilt of this sin was imputed, and the same death in sin, and corrupted nature, conveyed to all their posterity descending from them by ordinary generation. From this original corruption, whereby we are utterly indisposed, disabled, and made opposite to all good, and wholly inclined to all evil, do proceed to all actual transgressions.19

  All this is worse news than most of us realize. The Bible teaches that every one of us is born “in Adam,” spiritually dead and an enemy of God. We are sinners, not people who happen to sin. Our nature is morally corrupt, not good.

  Everything about us—mind, will, emotions, and body—has been horribly dis- figured by the original sin of Adam and Eve. While we do not act as immorally as we could (no one is totally depraved), we all act badly. In Romans 3:10–12 (NKJV), Paul said straightforwardly,

  There is none righteous, no, not one;

  There is none who understands;

  There is none who seeks after God.

  They have all turned aside;

  They have together become unprofitable;

  There is none who does good, no, not one.

  Because of all of this, Christ’s coming was good news (actually, it was incredible, awesome, unbelievable news). If we are spiritually dead sinners at birth, we need something to bring us back to life, or we go to hell forever. Christ’s atoning death on the cross is the “something” that was necessary to allow us new life and heaven for eternity.

  You Are of Infinite Value to God

  I want to ask you a question that isn’t easy to answer. It will require some thought, but I want you to be as honest as possible. What do you think you’re worth? Don’t answer in dollar-and-cents terms, but in broader terms.

  The value of an object is often reflected by the price we are willing to pay for it. Have you ever considered what God was willing to “pay” for you? Look at Paul’s words: “There is one God and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus, who gave himself as a ransom for all men—the testimony given in its proper time.”20

  God “ransomed” you with the most valuable thing He had, His Son, to die for our sins. God paid the highest price possible to redeem our souls. That ought to tell us something. I sure wouldn’t offer the life of one of my children as a ransom unless it was for something of utmost value. Even then, it would kill me to do so. It had to have been torturous for God the Father to send His Son to die for our sins, yet God doing that tells us how much we must be worth to Him.

  From here on, the things I go into are true only about people who have put their faith in Christ and have become Christians. I am not trying to be mean-spirited here. It’s just that the Bible is exclusionary. It excludes people from heaven on the basis of whether or not they have put their faith in Jesus Christ. If you put your faith in Christ, you’re in. If you didn’t, you’re out. If you did, there are things that are true about you now that are not true about the non-Christian. Not my idea—God’s.

  You Are God’s Child

  Have you ever been at a party where people play games that are made up of fantasy questions? They’ll ask questions such as, “If you could be any person in history, who would you be?” or “If you were a type of car, what kind would you be?” Here’s one I want you to answer: If you could choose any person from history to be your father, who would you choose?

  I have no idea who you chose as your fantasy father. Maybe you chose a king or a president or a movie star or a sports hero or a minister. But let’s leave fantasyland and look at the truth. Besides your earthly father, there is another Father who adopted you when you became a Christian. Paul wrote about this in his letter to the Ephesians: “In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.”21

  One of Jesus’ disciples, John, wrote about this great truth as well. From his words, you can tell how astonished John was about this: “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!”22

  So, if you are a Christian, you now have God for your Father. You now have an all-knowing, all-powerful, everywhere at once, just, merciful, good, in control, unchanging, and perfectly loving Dad. How does that compare to the one you chose when I posed the question to you?

  You Are a Brother or Sister to Christ

  Many times people who are down on themselves walk around carrying a lot of shame. They dwell on bad things they’ve done or bad things that have happened to them. This issue of shame becomes particularly potent when we think of our relationship with God. We convince ourselves that God is so upset with us over what we’ve done that He is actually ashamed of us! Read the words of the writer to the Hebrews:

  Both the one who makes men holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers. He says, “I will declare your name to my brothers; in the presence of the congregation I will sing your praises.”23

  That’s a passage loaded with powerful truth! Jesus Christ, God the Son, is not ashamed to call you His brother or sister. You are in the family of God, have God the Father as your Dad, and Christ as your Brother. That would make a pretty incredible family portrait, wouldn’t you say?

  You Are a Joint Heir with Christ

  Have you ever been jealous of someone who appeared to have it all? You know the kind of person I’m talking about. He wears all the right clothes, drives the right car, lives in the right neighborhood, eats at the right restaurants, hangs out with all the right people. I remember seeing someone like this and later found out that this person had inherited all his money. Just think of it. All he did to have it all was to be born into the right family, and then he simply inherited all that he had!

  That’s what it means to be an heir. You inherit what is legally or naturally a part of your parents’ estate. Think of the spiritual implications of this concept. With God as your Father, you inherit everything from Him. Paul wrote of this in his letter to the Galatians: “Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, ‘Abba, Father.’ So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir.”24

  You are a joint heir with Christ, which means that everything He has is yours as well, and He has it all. Man, are you loaded!

  You Have the Holy Spirit As a Guarante
e That You Belong to God

  When you became a Christian, the Holy Spirit of God took up residence in your heart. God isn’t just up in heaven on His throne. He is now inside you sitting on the throne of your heart. The Holy Spirit living inside you means that you have a constant companion who is there whenever you need Him. Isn’t that a comforting truth? The key passage about this truth is in Ephesians:

  You also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.25

  We hear a lot about guarantees in commercials and advertisements. It’s the sponsor’s way of saying he stands behind his product. Isn’t it great that God stands behind our salvation by giving us the Holy Spirit as His guarantee?

  You Have Christ’s Life within You

  Another life-changing truth out of the Bible is that when we became Christians, we were made “new creatures” in Christ and have the life of Christ in us. The important passage in Paul’s letter to the Colossians on this point states, “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.”26

  As Jesus lives in you, He will change you. You aren’t hopelessly bound to your past or your weaknesses. Ask God to help you believe that Jesus lives in you and that you can change. Thank Him that Jesus not only showed us how to live when He was on the earth, but by living within us, Christ enables us to live like Him today. In that sense, we imitate Him and are to live with the question, “What would Jesus do?” hanging over every action.

  You Have Christ’s Righteousness

  Part of seeing yourself in an emotionally and spiritually healthy way is seeing yourself realistically. Too many of us tend to dwell on the shortcomings in our lives. This sort of distorted thinking is damaging and defeating.