Just South of Sunrise

by Grace Palmer

  “I can’t. I have to go.”

  Liza turned to him, frowning. “What does that mean? Do you have to leave town or something?”

  He shuffled his feet back and forth, and Liza couldn’t remember a time she’d ever seen him so fidgety. Ben always oozed confidence and grace, but the man before her was nervous, itching to get away.

  “I enlisted in the navy. I leave for boot camp tomorrow.”

  A sharp wind blew, but Liza had chills for another reason. She shook her head. “I don’t…I don’t understand. When did you enlist? How are you leaving tomorrow? That’s so fast—”

  “I enlisted a month ago. I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t know how.”

  “How about, ‘I’m going to boot camp’?” Liza spat, feeling heat rising in her cheeks and tears burning in her eyes. “Or ‘Hey, Liza, I enlisted in the navy.’ Both are great options. Anything would have been better than dropping it on me like this. I don’t have any time to prepare. I would have taken time off work so we could be together. I wouldn’t have spent our last night together working.”

  Ben lowered his head. “I thought it would be easier if we didn’t spend too much time together.”

  This didn’t make any sense. Liza knew she was being bombarded with bad information, so her ability to process was slower than normal, but why wouldn’t Ben want to spend time with her? How would avoiding her make a long-distance relationship easier?

  “How long is boot camp? Do you know where you’ll be stationed afterward? Can you make phone calls or send letters? Surely, you can, right? It’s not like you’re going off to war.”

  Ben shifted his feet again, looking down at the ground.

  Liza felt sick. “You’re going off to war.”

  “That was the idea, yeah.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice cracked. Liza wanted to stay strong. She wanted Ben to know she supported him, but this was too much all at once. She needed time to digest. To plan. To prepare.

  He looked up at her, and his usually bright green eyes were dull and distant. It was almost like he’d already left.

  “I wanted to delay the inevitable.”

  “How did delaying telling me delay you leaving? You could have told me, and we could have figured it out together.”

  Ben shook his head. “I’m not talking about me leaving. Yes, me leaving is inevitable, but I’m talking about our relationship. I’m talking about how unrealistic long-distance relationships are.”

  Liza had been angry with Ben for keeping this from her, but suddenly, all of her emotions drained away. It felt like someone had pulled a plug and all of her frustration and anger and fear washed away, leaving behind only disbelief.

  She felt numb.

  “You’re breaking up with me?”

  Ben couldn’t even answer. He looked down at the ground, avoiding her eyes, and Liza was actually grateful for it. She didn’t want him to see that she was crying.

  “You don’t even want to try?” she asked.

  “I don’t see the point. I’m going to be on the other side of the world, and I don’t know where I’ll go next. Or if I’ll make it out.”

  “Don’t say that.” Liza couldn’t even let herself think that was a possibility.

  “See?” Ben stepped forward and grabbed Liza’s hand. She wanted to pull away, but despite everything, the warmth of his fingers around hers was comforting. “I don’t want to put you through this. I don’t want to leave you at home while you worry about me, wondering where I am and if I’m okay. It’s not fair to you.”

  “None of this is fair,” Liza croaked. “None of this is okay.”

  Ben squeezed her hand once and then backed away, clearing his throat. “It will be better for you—for both of us—if you just move on. Move on, and I’ll do the same.”

  Before Liza could even respond, Ben turned around and left. It was the last time Liza would see him for three decades.

  18

  Ben’s mouth fell open and his arm dropped to his side. For a second, Liza thought he might be angry. It was his sister’s wedding after all. Maybe he was mad at her for ruining the evening by bringing up their past. Maybe she shouldn’t have. Maybe she should have—

  Suddenly, he looked around the room, grabbed Liza’s hand, and pulled them both towards the double doors at the back of the barn that opened out onto a patio.

  It was cold outside, so guests sitting at tables nearby yelped when Ben opened the door, but he didn’t seem to notice.

  He closed the door behind them and looked around the patio to make sure they were alone. Then, he turned to Liza, tipped his head to the side with a sad smile, and sighed.

  “I’ve been wondering when you’d want to talk about this.”

  Liza felt self-conscious suddenly. “I’m sorry. Maybe your sister’s wedding isn’t the right time to—”

  “No, I’m glad,” he said, wrapping his warm fingers around her chilled hands. “I’m relieved. I’ve wanted to talk to you about everything, but I didn’t want to force anything on you. You made it clear early on that you didn’t want to talk to me, period, so I didn’t want to push my luck.”

  “I shouldn’t have said that,” Liza started.

  “Yes, you should have.” Ben dipped his chin and looked at her under heavy brows. “I deserved it, Liza. I deserved worse. You’ve been incredibly kind to me considering what I did. How I left.”

  “You’re hard to resist.” The admission was another stone loosened from the wall around her heart, but Liza couldn’t keep it in. It was the truth. Whatever it was about Ben that drew her in, it was effective. She couldn’t force herself to stay away from him, regardless of how afraid she was he’d hurt her again.

  He smiled and took another deep breath. “So are you, Liza Hall. I’ve always been drawn to you.”

  “Then why did you leave?” Liza asked again. Inside, the question had been spur of the moment, reckless. But now, she wanted to know. She was ready to know.

  “At the time, I didn’t even understand why I left.” He must have seen the confusion that crossed her face because he stepped closer to her, folding her hands in his and pressing them to his chest. “I know it would make us both feel better if I had some grand, noble reason, but I want to be honest with you. I was young—we both were—and I didn’t know how to deal with what the two of us were doing.”

  “Dating?”

  “Being in love,” Ben whispered. “I didn’t know how to be in love with you and complete my goals. I wasn’t ready for how much loving you would change everything for me. When we started talking in the bar and hanging out together, I didn’t know what I was getting into. Maybe if I had, I would’ve stayed away from you. But I’m glad I didn’t know. Because I’m grateful every day for the year we spent together.”

  Liza didn’t know how she should feel. “Are you saying you couldn’t stay with me because you loved me too much?”

  He chuckled and shook his head. “It sounds ridiculous, but kind of? I was too immature for what we were doing, but now…”

  “Now?” Liza’s heart was fluttering in her chest. She did her best to swallow down her nerves, but she could feel her hands trembling.

  “I can’t help but feel like this is all fate, Liza.”

  Liza shivered, and Ben slipped out of his jacket and laid it over her shoulders. Then, he pulled her close, wrapping his hands around her waist.

  “I don’t want to rush you,” he continued. “And I don’t want to freak you out. It’s not like I’ve been pining for you for thirty years, waiting for the day when our paths would cross.”

  “You weren’t stalking me?” Liza asked, sliding her arms around his neck.

  “No, I’m afraid not.” He smiled. “Are you disappointed?”

  “No. I was just asking to see if I needed to scream for help or file a restraining order.”

  “I don’t think that’s necessary.”

  “Okay, great. Sorry to interrupt. Continue.”

  He tipped
his head back and laughed before smiling down at her. “I didn’t just sit and wait for you. As you know, I had a daughter. I had a life. I traveled and lived. But I never forgot you, Liza. Deep down, I always hoped I’d run into you again. If only to see you in person, apologize, and mend a part of my past I’ve always felt was unfinished.”

  Liza related to that feeling. As much as she tried to push Ben out of her conscious thoughts, she always felt like the ending to their story was unsatisfactory. She always thought there should be more.

  “And then I found you here, in Willow Beach of all places, and it feels like life has finally brought us back together. It feels like the right time. We’re both single, and I know now that the only thing I want to accomplish in my life is to be happy, and I am happy when I’m with you. It feels like this could work. Doesn’t it?” His mouth twisted nervously to the side.

  “It does.” The words slipped out before Liza could truly consider them, but she knew they were true.

  If she didn’t think she and Ben had a chance, she wouldn’t be having this conversation with him. There would be no point. But she’d asked him to explain his actions to her because she hoped she could forgive him and move forward. She hoped she could trust him again, and now, finally, she felt like she could.

  “It feels like it could work,” she said, her eyes glossing over with happy tears. “I want it to work.”

  Ben grinned and brought a hand to her cheek, smoothing his thumb over her cheekbone. “I want it to work, too, Liza. I’m ready for this. For you.”

  Liza curled her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck. “Took you long enough.”

  Without warning, Ben bent down and pressed his lips to Liza’s.

  The kiss wasn’t earth-shattering and knee-quaking. It was gentle. It spoke to their history and to their still-tender hearts. Ben wasn’t trying to sweep Liza off her feet and wow her with a whirlwind romance. They didn’t want an explosion; they wanted an eternal flame. This was the spark that would light it.

  Hot and heavy or not, Liza felt Ben’s kiss in every part of her.

  She curled her fingers around his neck as he gripped her hips and pulled her close, and she squeezed her eyes closed, absorbing every second of the embrace.

  It had been a long time since she’d been kissed like this. Not only because she’d been divorced for three years, but because Liza and Cliff never kissed like this.

  “You two are like chickens,” Liza’s mom had said to her one year at Thanksgiving. “Pecking at one another out of habit.”

  Liza had assured her mom she and Cliff did enough kissing in their alone time, but it was a lie. She and Cliff rarely kissed. Just a quick hello, a quick goodbye, a quick good night. It was routine and emotionless. Nothing like kissing Ben.

  Ben smoothed his hands up Liza’s back and beneath the jacket he’d thrown over her shoulders. He gripped her shoulder blades and seemed to inhale as the kiss ended, like he was breathing in as much of her as was possible.

  They pressed their foreheads together and smiled, and they could have been twenty-somethings again. Liza felt young and light and carefree.

  She felt like she was in love.

  “No way,” Ben whispered.

  Liza pulled away, thinking something was wrong, and then she followed Ben’s gaze upward to the sky. And the snow.

  “It’s snowing,” she said, mostly to herself.

  “I can’t believe it. It’s snowing. Again.”

  Again. Just like it had been the first time they’d kissed.

  “Can you believe this?” Ben asked, wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her against his side as he watching the fat flakes fall.

  Liza nestled against his side and shook her head, smiling so hard she thought her cheeks would start to cramp. “No,” she said. “I can’t believe any of it.”

  19

  When someone knocked on the cottage’s front door a few days after the wedding, Liza called from the kitchen for Ben to come on inside.

  “Door’s open!”

  She was surprised he was knocking at all, honestly. He’d been coming over regularly enough that Liza had started leaving the door unlocked for him.

  When I have my own place, I’ll make him a key, she thought.

  “Wow, Aunt Liza! This town must be safe if you’re just going to let people waltz right into your house.”

  At the sound of her niece’s voice, Liza dropped her cookie cutter on the counter and spun around. “Angela?”

  Angela appeared in the kitchen doorway and waved. She had on a pair of overalls with an oversized knit sweater underneath. Her hair was pulled back in a high bun with a colorful scarf wrapped around the base. She was boho-chic and lovely, and a genuine sight for sore eyes.

  “Why do you seem surprised to see me?” Angela asked. “You knew I was coming.”

  Yes, Liza had known, but she’d forgotten. Entirely.

  The three days after Stacy’s wedding had been a whirlwind. Not only because Liza had to package all of the leftover food up for Stacy and Ben’s parents to take home and pick up all of her stuff from Georgia’s kitchen at the inn, but also because she and Ben had spent every spare second together discussing their plans for the future.

  Plans that involved Liza staying in Willow Beach.

  The decision wasn’t entirely based on Ben. After all, he didn’t even live in Willow Beach. He was only visiting for his sister’s wedding.

  But Liza liked the town. She liked the friends she met, and even if she didn’t end up staying forever, she didn’t see why she couldn’t make her time there slightly more open-ended.

  She was thinking about ending her lease on the kitchen space she rented in Boston and moving her headquarters to Willow Beach. Or, she could keep the space in Boston and hire a few more cooks to work out of it while Liza herself was stationed in Willow Beach. It was only a couple of hours to Boston, anyway, so Liza could make the drive as often as she needed to in order to meet with clients.

  “I work entirely online,” Ben had said in encouragement of the plan. “You can do consultations over video chat or the phone and meet up to taste-test food. It’s not a problem.”

  That had sounded crazy at first, but the more she thought about it, the more she saw a way it could really all work.

  “Of course, I knew you were coming,” Liza said to Angela. “I just didn’t think you’d be here so early.”

  Angela dropped her purse, keys, and phone on the counter with Liza’s stuff. “Am I interrupting anything?”

  Liza glanced at the clock above the stove and yelped. “Actually, you’re a lifesaver. I have an appointment scheduled, and I almost missed it. I got a little lost in rolling out this cookie dough.”

  “Gingerbread cookies,” Angela sighed, smelling the air. Then, she shook her head as if clearing her thoughts and frowned. “What appointment? We were supposed to do coffee at eleven. And I only scheduled you the one wedding. Aunt Liza! Did you schedule more work? This is supposed to be a vacation.”

  “I didn’t schedule more work, I swear.” Liza untied her apron and hung it on the hook next to the fridge. “And we can still get coffee afterward. This is an appointment about a rental property, actually.”

  As Liza darted around, slipping on her shoes and grabbing her coat, Angela followed, peppering her with questions. “What rental property? An apartment? In Willow Beach? Are you moving? Are you retiring from catering? Do I need to find a new job?”

  Finally, Liza grabbed Angela by the shoulders and looked her in the eyes. “Come with me, and I’ll explain everything in the car.”

  Liza explained her plan for running the catering company from Willow Beach to Angela with no small amount of nerves. As much as the business belonged to Liza, it belonged to Angela, too. They were in this together, and Liza didn’t know what she would do if Angela didn’t agree with her decision.

  “So, you really like it here, then?” Angela asked. “Beach life is your thing?”

  Liza la
ughed and turned onto Main Street. “Apparently. I love the sound of the ocean and the people are all so friendly. I never thought I’d want to leave the city, but these last few weeks have changed my mind.”

  Angela turned to Liza, eyes narrowed. “Are you sure someone hasn’t changed your mind too? Didn’t you have a date not too long ago?”

  “I wouldn’t make a decision like this only because of a man.”

  “I didn’t say only because of a man,” Angela countered. “But maybe a man played a small part? Wasn’t his name Ben?”

  Liza couldn’t help but smile at the mention of his name, and Angela snapped her fingers and pointed. “Aha. There it is. The truth!”

  Liza pursed her lips and rolled her eyes. “Just tell me what you think. Do you think it makes sense for me to stay here for a while? It’s not like I have a place to live in Boston, anyway.”

  “Aunt Liza, I want you to do whatever makes you happy. I’m convinced that you can taste your happiness in your food. If you are happy, your food is better, and better food is good for business.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Positive,” Angela said with a confident nod.

  Liza pulled into a parking space on the right side of Main Street in front of an empty storefront. “That’s good, because I’m here to look at a business space.”

  Angela squealed, and the two women walked into the appointment arm in arm.

  “What do you think? Do either of you have any questions?” Ramon, the landlord, was an intimidating man at well over six feet tall, but he was as friendly as anyone Liza had ever met. Liza would be happy to have him as her landlord.

  “It’s perfect,” Angela said, pressing her hands to her heard. “The exposed brick, the pressed-tin ceilings, the natural daylight. It’s a dream.”

  “I like it fine,” Liza said, trying to counter Angela’s enthusiasm.

  “I love it. My only question: where do we sign?”

  Liza laughed. “Okay, hold on. We still need to think about this. It’s a great space, but I don’t want to rush into anything.”