by Lola Gabriel
It was just the two of them, and her small bedroom, and the morning sun filtering through her curtains and making his green eyes glow so bright and so pale. His bare skin, as well, so she almost felt like she was dreaming. His hands on her brought her to reality, brought her to wrapping her legs around him and helping him find a rhythm that worked for both of them.
“What got into you?” Easton asked him, breathing it into his ear, nibbling him again afterwards.
“I couldn’t wait any longer,” he gasped, equally breathless, equally quiet and excited. “Last night, I…” Easton put a hand over his mouth, and he briefly closed his lovely green eyes, kissing her palm. “Sorry,” he muttered, and his eyelids fluttered open again, and just seeing his smiling eyes looking down at her intensified the experience for Easton. She moaned and pulled him closer, leaning up to bury herself in his chest, clawing him just a little, until he held her close in turn. One arm was around her, the other bracing against the mattress, and together, they groaned and shuddered. Easton called out his name and found his mouth to kiss.
They collapsed onto the bed, their limbs still entangled.
“Wow,” Ash panted, looking at her, smiling. His chest was damp with sweat and rising and falling fast. “Easton that was amazing.” Easton smiled, leaned over, and kissed him.
“Yeah,” she said, “right?”
He pulled her down onto him, both their bodies warm and damp and very alive. She could feel his heart thumping against her own. He kissed her deeply. She knew it was crazy, the feeling she seemed to have for him… But she felt perfectly content and perfectly safe right now, here with Ash. She leaned her cheek against his skin and closed her eyes. He was stroking her lower back. She was about to drift off to sleep, her breathing calm and even now, her body totally relaxed slotted against his, when she opened her eyes.
“Oh!” she cried. “Pickles!”
Ash laughed and tried to look down at her, but the angle was very awkward. “Excuse me?”
Easton pushed herself up and away from him, sat up, and pulled the sheets around her.
“My cat,” she said. “My cat’s gone. He was missing last night. Damn, how did I forget? I should have been looking for him!” She had gone from bliss to misery in a moment. Tears were pricking at her eyelids.
“Hey,” Ash said, clearly hearing how serious this was in her voice. He sat up, keeping a hand on her back. “Hey, it’s okay, we’ll look. It’s my fault. I came and distracted you. I should have called or… well, something.” Easton wiped her dripping eyes with the heel of her hand.
“Sorry, this is so uncool. But I must have let him out somehow yesterday. He’s an indoor cat, and he’s used to California. I’m really worried about him.” Ash swung his legs off the bed and stood up.
“Let’s go look, then,” he said. “He can’t be far away, right?”
Easton smiled at him and sniffled. “Really? I mean, I can go on my own. It’s okay, if you need to get back. Where’s Pen?”
“She’s with my sister,” Ash answered. “I want to help.” He put out a hand, and Easton took it, letting him pull her from the bed and onto her feet. The pair dressed and put on their outdoor clothes. “What does he look like?” Ash asked.
“Uh, he’s gray, fluffy. Maybe a little chubby.” Easton pulled out her phone, unlocked it, and showed him a picture. “Ugh, he’s probably outside cowering behind the trash cans or something. There’s no way he’d go on a wild adventure, he sleeps curled up next to me. This is so ridiculous, and so very, very unsexy.”
At this, Ash pulled Easton toward him. He kissed the top of her head.
“He’s your cat, and you love him,” he said. “C’mon, let’s go find him.”
13
Ash
Outside, it was cold, but not too cold for a fluffy cat, Ash thought. He didn’t want to bring up the idea that it could be too cold, or that it could have been at night, or that there might be predators in the woods around here. Certainly, this had ruined his plan to reveal himself as a shifter to Easton. Well, maybe he’d ruined that by sleeping with her, but when they’d finally really been alone, neither of them had been able to help themselves.
For a few minutes, they looked around the edges of Easton and Hannah’s building. It was a squat, brick apartment block. It was two stories, with a covered walkway running around its edge on both levels. Easton called the cat’s name.
“Pickles! Here, buddy, where are you?” Her shaking voice took any potential comedy out of the situation. There was no sign of the cat. He wasn’t in the recess that held the trash cans, nor under any of the fire escapes. Next, they looked under cars in the lot, but he wasn’t there, either.
Easton was trying to keep her breathing and her expression steady, Ash could tell. Without thinking about it, he took her hand and gave it a squeeze. She looked over and smiled up at him. Then, distracted, she looked around them. On one side was the road, where Ash had assured her he had seen no sign of any cat (dead or alive, he added in his head, but he wouldn’t say this out loud), and on the other three was the start of the woods, mostly evergreen and deeply shaded. Easton gazed into the trees for a while before she took a deep breath.
“He’s a terrible wild animal,” she said. “Terrible animal, even domestic. He thinks he’s a person. He’d hate it in there… but we should look, right?” Ash still had her hand, and he was rubbing the back of it with a thumb.
“Sure,” he said, “but it’s the start of a big forest. I mean…” He was upsetting her, he knew it. “I mean, there’s lots and lots of places he could be. Places he could be hiding. He’s a cat, cats come home.”
Easton looked utterly unconvinced, but she nodded anyway. Then she dragged him softly toward the tree line. He followed her, just a step behind. Ash didn’t love the woods in his human form. Maybe it was because he’d barely been in them in his softer, more breakable body since before his first shift. He began to join in with calling the cat’s name, his voice sounding ready among the heavy, heady dusk created by the trees. Under their feet, pine needles and some small and hardy shrubs softened their footfalls. They walked for a few minutes in a straight line before Easton tugged them right.
“Can we circle around?”
“Yeah,” Ash said, hoping Easton had a good sense of direction, because in his human form, his was beyond terrible. It was strange what differed between one version of himself and another, and yet how they were also one and the same.
Easton was holding his hand tightly, no longer calling the cat’s name. They were deep into the trees and the dark.
“He’s gone, isn’t he?” she murmured, leaning limp against a long, straight trunk. Ash turned to her and rubbed her upper arms.
“He’s not here,” he said, “but like I said, he’s a cat! They know where home is.”
“He’s an indoor cat, and new here…”
“Still a cat, it’s innate.” Easton smiled at him, kissed him briefly, and took him in her arms, her head on one of his shoulders.
“Thanks for trying,” she said in a small voice. Then, all of a sudden, her whole body tensed up. “What was that?” Ash leaned away from her.
“What?” He wheeled around. Easton was clutching at his fleece.
“It was… It looked like an animal. A big animal. Are there bears here? Brown bears?”
He positioned himself in front of Easton, tense. “Are you sure? You saw a bear?”
Easton’s hand was on his back. “Yeah. I know a bear when I see one…”
“Crap,” Ash muttered, unable to help himself.
“Do you think a bear would eat a cat?” Easton asked, her voice wavering a little.
“No,” he answered. “I think it’s watching us. Can you describe the bear, Easton?”
She wasn’t touching him anymore.
“What?” Ash turned to look at her, and her extremely confused expression made him pause. “It looked like a bear,” Easton said.
“Right,” Ash said. “Of course it did.
No notable markings, though?”
“No.” Easton’s brows were raised. “Is there a specific bear you’re looking for?”
He really didn’t want this to be how he told her. “No… Sort of… Look, I need to tell you something, but I can’t do it here…”
There was a crashing, scraping, tree-limbs-snapping sound a little way off. Easton almost jumped out of her skin. Ash turned, and this time, he saw the heavy, dark shape through the trees. In the half-light, it was impossible for him to tell who it was, but Easton was right: there was definitely a brown bear. Someone was watching them. He took Easton’s hand.
“Quick, back to yours?” Easton led him confidently through the trees, moving quickly but lightly. As soon as they reached the parking lot, she stopped.
“What the hell is going on?” she asked Ash, giving him a hell of a stare. Her eyes looked amazing in the spring light. He put a hand to her cheek.
“Do you trust me, Easton?” She blinked, surprised.
“I mean, I’ve only known you a week, Ash…” He smiled, his eyes searching her face.
“That’s not what I asked,” he said. And then he repeated, “Do you trust me?”
Silently, Easton nodded. She closed her eyes for a moment and kissed the palm of the hand cupping her cheek. Despite the circumstances, Ash was flooded with hot butterflies. He took a deep, theoretically calming breath.
“Okay,” he said. “I trust you, too. And I’m going to tell you something… show you something, and it’s going to be hard, okay?”
Easton’s face had softened, and she was looking at him like… well, like she loved him. This thought was a lot to take. Ash was about to blow her world apart. But even so, he wanted it to be true. He wanted them being together to be possible, even though it quite clearly wasn’t practical.
“Okay,” she said, almost in a whisper. “Do we need to go inside?” Ash gave her a smile that he knew must look relieved.
“Yeah,” he said. “I really, really want to kiss you right now, but we shouldn’t out here. And… I should show you first. The thing.” Easton was walking toward the stairs to her apartment, so he followed.
“Mysterious,” she said. “Afterward, I need to make posters about Pickles…”
Oh, the cat. Someone had taken the cat. And Easton’s mind was still on that. She wasn’t ready for this, but when would she be? And clearly, she was going to find out something was going on, one way or another.
Walking down the corridor to her apartment, Ash felt like he could hardly breathe. He pushed his curls back from his forehead as she unlocked the door. When she walked in, her shoulders visibly slumped.
“Ugh, I half-thought he’d be here and come to the door like normal…” Ash could hear the tears in her voice. She turned to him, and after he closed the door with a foot, she put her arms around him and lay a cheek on his chest. “Sorry,” she mumbled into his shirt. “I’m sorry…”
He held her close and rubbed her back softly. “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.”
Easton stepped back, took a breath, and dried her eyes with a sleeve.
“Gosh, we just ran away from a bear, and I’m crying about my cat. And you… What do you need to show me?” She smiled, clearly still fighting back tears. Ash knew his face must show his fear and his worry. “Hey, how bad can it be?” Easton asked, taking his hand. He softly took his hand back.
“It’s… a lot,” he replied. “Really.” Easton looked at the floor, then up at him.
“Ash,” she said, “I really, really care about you. I know this has been quick, but it feels right, don’t you—”
He kissed her. It might be the last time he got to. She pulled him closer, pressing their bodies together. She felt so very good.
“Hang on,” Ash said, breaking away. Easton looked a little put out. “No, I mean, I feel the same. I feel a lot for you, Easton. But you need to know this about me before we talk about what we’re doing, okay?” Easton nodded, once again looking worried.
“Okay,” she said, “go ahead.” Ash walked into the living room part of the living room/kitchen. It was the largest area of the small apartment.
“So,” he said, “I can tell you, or I can show you. You might not believe me if I tell you.”
“Show me then,” Easton said. Ash almost began pulling off his shirt but stopped.
“This is going to be scary,” he told her. “Like, really quite scary. Will you be okay?” Easton really looked worried now. Silently, she nodded. Ash continued pulling off his clothes.
“I’ve seen you naked, Ash, there was nothing weird or scary…” His look must have been sharper than he thought, because she trailed off. She was beginning to look tense.
Ash was down to his underwear, and he thought that he could probably sacrifice his boxer-briefs to save the indignity and oddness of taking them off here in the living room in front of a freaked-out Easton. He could hear her trying to control her breathing, most likely wondering what the hell she had gotten herself into and how to get out of it. He wanted to tell her he loved her, make it okay. He wanted to stop. But he knew he couldn’t, not if they were being watched. Not if his pack knew about them.
“Just… don’t freak out, Easton. I promise you it’s okay,” he said. And he began to shift, right there in her living room.
14
Easton
It looked painful. That was Easton’s first thought when Ash folded over, his knees buckling, and began to contort in ways that shouldn’t be possible. It was like time had slowed down; she saw everything. She saw when he began to sprout fur, how his underwear ripped down the seams. She saw the teeth growing in, long and sharp and a little yellowed, before his jaw lengthened into a snout.
She couldn’t move. Of course she couldn’t. Where there had just been her… well, where there had just been Ash, a bear now stood: a large grizzly who took up almost all the room between the sofa and TV. It was looking at her, head to the side, breathing heavily from what had just happened.
The bear took a step forward. Easton heard herself gasp. It stopped. He stopped. He pawed the ground a couple of times, nervous or restless or something.
“Okay,” Easton breathed. “Okay, I’m not going to run away. I… I want to think this was some kind of a trick, but… I saw it. All of it.” Again, the bear began to walk forward. This time, Easton tried to remain calm. She regulated her breathing, trying not to tense up.
The bear was within touching distance. He closed his eyes for a moment and nosed her gently. Trembling, Easton put out a hand.
“Can I?” she asked, hand hovering over his head. Again, he nosed her, then lifted himself a little on his haunches to meet her palm. His fur was surprisingly soft. He seemed to like the contact, because he leaned into it. Easton stroked him and touched his ear. “Wow,” she said, “I’m petting a bear.” She laughed, then abruptly stopped. “What the hell is happening?” she muttered to herself. “This is not happening.”
The bear sat up a little, like he wanted to tell her, Yes, it is, Easton. Easton closed her eyes and opened them again. Yep, there was still a bear in her living room where Ash had been.
Today had been full of surprises. She hadn’t expected to open the door to Ash, or to sleep with him, and she certainly hadn’t expected this. She felt so much right now that it was like her skin was sore with it. She had even before this bear-in-apartment situation. She was terrified of what she felt for Ash—shocked, disbelieving. And she should be terrified of this bear. But she wasn’t.
Easton took her hand off his head and sat down in front of him.
“Hi,” she said, trying to look into his eyes and see if she could find… This was utterly ridiculous. The bear made a noise kind of like a purr. “Is this… is this happening?” Easton asked. “Is this really happening?” And she had a thought. “In the forest, that was… How many… What are you?”
Of course, the bear didn’t answer, just looked at her with those big, mournful eyes.
“I know y
ou can’t tell me right now. Can you, like, can you go back? I need to talk to you. I need this explained. Or disproven, or… I… I need you, Ash. Can you come back, please? Even if you’re hiding behind the sofa or something, I really need you.”
The need had come upon her like a dam breaking. Easton needed him not only to explain what on earth was happening, but also, in this strange moment, this moment of fear and confusion, to hold her and to tell her everything was okay.
The change back seemed quicker than the change to a bear, but maybe that was because it was a return. She was seeing something she expected emerge in front of her, not something she could barely believe.
In just a couple of seconds it was Ash standing there in front of her, naked. She should be angry, she should shout at him, cry, freak out, but as soon as she saw him, his eyes worried and his hair unkempt and how he was standing there awkward and afraid, she opened up her arms and threw herself toward him. He was so warm against her. He pressed his face into her neck, holding her tight. And she felt safe in his arms. She felt loved. She felt better than she had in a long time.
They stayed like that a while, and then Easton relaxed and let Ash go. She stepped back. He did, too. He grabbed his jeans and began pulling them on.
“What the fuck was that?” she demanded, still standing quite close. Now in just his jeans, Ash grinned at her. It had just burst out of him, that much was clear.
“That’s better than running away screaming,” he said.
“Did I just hallucinate? Were you…?”
“A bear, yeah,” he said. He sat down on the small sofa. Easton sat beside him but turned her body to look at him. He was beautiful, and she wanted to kiss him. First, though, he needed to explain himself. Ash looked at her.
“So,” he began, “I’m a shifter.” He waited for her reaction. She only stared at him.