“Yes, you will.” She grins against his lips.
“Gross! Mom!” Max screeches, tugging on Matthew’s hand.
We all laugh at the five year old.
When they leave, Lily giggles with a huge blush as she pulls me down the hall. I quickly take note of the artistic paintings and photos and all the doors. She pulls me into one and flops onto the white king bed.
“You seem happy,” I tease, pulling off my coat and beanie, placing them neatly on the trunk in front of the bed. I fall onto the bed next to her.
“I am,” she says, eyes closed in bliss.
“I’m happy for you,” I tell her earnestly.
Her smile slowly diminishes as she faces me. “I’m sorry about what happened,” she says. “If I wasn’t so freaking stupid, none of this would have happened. I just—I wasn’t thinking. And I ruined things between you two.”
“You didn’t ruin anything.” I face her with a frown. “He did. He shouldn’t have reacted the way he did. That part’s on him and only him.”
She bites her lip, obviously not believing me. “Where are you staying now?”
I sigh and face the ceiling. “You’ll never believe it.”
“I bet I will.” She sits up and smirks down at me, brows waggling. “I’m a messy bitch who lives for drama.”
I laugh and sit up too. “I’ll go into grave detail if you have ice cream.”
“What flavor?” She smiles.
I smile back.
An hour later, she’s all caught up. From my father’s affair, to her family, to Grey pushing me, screaming, accusing, to Mason—everything. Through it, she was super focused—except for when Matthew came in wearing a towel around his waist to get clothes to change into after his shower. She took that time to explain how well the dimples above his butt were good places to rest her feet. Which was just outright gross.
“So what do you plan to do?” She asks the big question.
I sigh. I’ve been wanting to avoid it because I don’t even really know. I kind of do, but it just hurts to think about.
“I don’t know,” I say, half telling the truth. Nothing is set in stone in my mind.
“It’s okay, you have time to figure things out,” she assures me, reaching out and taking my hand. I smile graciously and squeeze her hand. She tugs and winks at me. My heart soars with appreciation. “You just have to remember to please yourself first. Go after what you want. What will make you happy. You come first, remember that.”
“You all seem to be cozy,” I change the subject, and she blushes. “And very happy. It’s kind of surprising how well they are together, Matthew and Max. The way Matthew looks at him makes my heart weep.” I clutch my heart for theatrics and bat my eyes with a sigh. She laughs.
“He adores Max. It’s why he did that stupid experiment with him.” She rolls her eyes, but I hear the love in her voice. “But, yeah, we’re all really good together. Thank God. Before Matt, I tried not to bring guys home and keep things on the low because I knew he wouldn’t like them. He never did. But with Matthew…I don’t know. He’s just different. Just sorta fits with us, you know?”
I nod. “You guys are adorable.”
She laughs and swirls her spoon around. “You up for some movies? There’s a Twilight marathon on tonight. Horrible movies, great for laughing at.”
I laugh and stand up, gathering our dirty bowls and spoons. “Sure. Put it on. I’ll be right back.”
“Kay-kay,” she replies.
I leave her in the bedroom and walk out into the main area. Matthew is reading Max a book on the couch. I smile at them as I walk into the kitchen and place the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. The kitchen is a mess of green slime and other things. I know they plan on cleaning later, but I can’t ignore the mess. I clean everything and feel better as the marble winks at me in thanks.
“Oh, crap. Sorry for the language, Maxie,” Matthew apologizes and stands up quickly. He looks frazzled.
“What’s wrong?” I ask, walking over to him.
“The annual charity ball for the program is tonight, in four hours. It’s been the big event of the year for over one hundred years. I almost forgot about it.” He looks guilty as he runs a hand through his hair, glancing back at Max, who is quietly reading under his breath.
“Then you better get ready.” I point out the obvious.
He looks confused. “You and Lil are coming with.”
“Huh?”
“It’s a big thing. All interns are invited and expected to attend.”
“Why didn’t they relay this information to me earlier?
“We did, in that meeting a few days ago. We talked,” he says incredulously.
“Oh…” I say, blushing. I haven’t been in the zone as of late.
“Oh, indeed. Come on. I’m sure Lil has something you can borrow.” He takes my hand and leads me back to the room.
Chapter Forty
There aren’t enough fingers and toes to count the amount of times I’ve been to a charity ball. When my mother wasn’t too busy traveling from continent to continent, she’d pretend to be motherly. Dressing me up in gowns and lecturing me about everything from schoolwork to memorizing social cues. She’d bring me along to charity balls and other social parties with the top one percent of the top one percent. Show me off to investors of her hospitals and any friends she acquired while traveling. Rich, powerful men and woman.
I felt like a show pony. She would brag about all the languages I learned. Everything I perfected that made her satisfied to have such an intelligent and talented daughter, she had me portray to these people I didn’t know. One time she had me play Mozart on a piano that was tucked in the corner of a charity event for kids’ education all around the world. The way everyone looked at me made me sick, used. But I held it in. All for Mother, of course.
I’ve had bad experiences at such events, but it’d be extremely selfish of me to skip this just because of memories of men gawking at me with creepy smiles.
Anyway, back to the present. We had to go to the nearby mall to buy dresses. Lily had to buy the dresses since I left my wallet at home. I promised to pay her back, but she assured me it was fine. Lily had dresses of her own that I could fit, barely. Our figures are a tad different. Whereas she’s slimmer and has a smaller chest, I’m curvier and the owner of a bigger chest.
But that’s not even the main reason we decided to shop for dresses. It’s because Matthew said the ball is the hotspot for big tycoons, investors, and psychologist hotshots. And hip-hugging dresses weren’t going to cut it. We had to dress like we were going to meet the Queen of England.
Since we didn’t have much time to go all out in the makeup department, we ended up doing a little light eye makeup, blush, and lipstick. My floor-length dress is a nude off-the-shoulder, with an appropriate amount of tiny glittering “diamonds.” After curling my hair and letting it fall into waves down my back, pinning a piece back with a cute diamond-encrusted pin, I was ready. Lily wore a stunning red dress with a split up her leg and put her hair up in a high ponytail.
Matthew’s jaw dropped when he saw us, especially when he laid eyes on her. He looked at her like she was an absolute goddess, and she looked like one. He looked at her with love, like she was the only girl worthy to worship, but also like he wanted to do very naughty things in her naughty-red-sin dress. I tried to not notice that part, but the rest was really sweet.
After getting Ms. Daisy, one of Matthew’s closest neighbors on his floor, to watch Max for the night, we headed out.
Now, we’re pulling up to where the charity ball is taking place—the mayor’s mansion. I normally don’t swoon over mansions since I’ve been surrounded by them my whole life, but his is worthy of my salivating. Huge columns, a wraparound balcony, two fountains, a circular cobblestone driveway, and it’s lit up like a museum.
“Wow,” I voice my dazzled thoughts.
Matthew laughs, standing beside me. “Yeah. The venue never changes, and I’m nev
er not impressed.”
“Who knew a rich fucker would have this glorious mansion?” Lily jokes, and we laugh.
“Miladies.” Matthew turns and holds out his hands, head bowed.
“MiMatthew,” Lily replies, taking his hand.
“Let’s go, guys.” I merely roll my eyes, taking his other hand.
We walk up the stone path, admiring how they glow beneath our feet. A beautiful and unique touch. Whoever this mayor is, he has great taste. The minute we get inside, we are met with an enchanting Bach piece I have memorized very well. The French decor screams money. We are led to a great big mahogany door with intricate designs carved in it. Two men in penguin tuxes pull the doors open, and the classical music fully meets my ears.
Ladies dress in their exquisite floor-length dresses that cost thousands of dollars, sporting diamond necklaces and elegant hair-dos. On the other hand, men dress in crisp black tuxes, some in white just to show off, with their hair gelled back, flashing off their hundreds of thousand-dollar watches.
“Whoa…these people have way too much money.” Lily gawks as she looks around.
A waiter offers us sparkling champagne. She quickly accepts.
“It’s all going to a good cause,” Matthew reassures, guiding us more into the room.
“What’s the cause this year?” I ask him before taking a long sip of the champagne. It’s sweet and sizzles lovely on my tongue. Makes my entire body feel warm. I drink some more.
“Giving kids psychological treatments who can’t afford them,” Matthew informs.
“That’s so sweet.” I take another long gulp. I’m almost done with the flute of champagne. It’s just so rich, literally and figuratively.
“We’ve done sweeter,” he says proudly with a charming grin.
A warm sensation floods my body, flushing my cheeks. I work for such an amazing company, it makes me tear up a little. I get to help people who need help, need someone to understand them, and take them for who they are. Not many people get the chance. So the fact that we’re making sure to give kids who feel alone in this world help is phenomenal. I may just be an intern, but I still feel like I’m helping, which is what I wanted since I was so young.
Champagne after champagne, we walk through the crowd. Matthew introduces Lily and me to people donating to the cause. I make sure to remember their genuine words of wanting to help in any way they could. People like to generalize others with a generous amount of money as snooty and without hearts, but they’re wrong. They haven’t met these wonderful people.
“Hey, Matthew,” Mark, his friend from the program, says with a wide smile. He and his date, a young girl with platinum blonde hair and a floor-length black dress, walk over to us. I try to stay in the loop of conversation, but I really have to pee. I should not have drunk so much of the champagne so fast.
“If you will please excuse me, I have to go to the ladies’ room,” I inform the group that’s lively chatting.
“I’ll come with,” Lily says.
“No, you stay here. I’ll be quick,” I assure her, and she nods.
Following Matthew’s instructions, I find the bathroom through some twists and turns. It looks like a fancy restaurant from Paris.
After using the bathroom, I touch up my makeup, swiping on some more glittering lip gloss. I stare into the mirror and feel an unknown string tug at my heart. I’m where I’ve dreamed of being eleven years ago, but the love of my life isn’t by my side. I used to think he was it, enough for me to put off my long-desired career and the life I wanted so desperately. But after his reaction to finding that test…I don’t know anymore.
Wiping away tears, saving my eye makeup, I leave the bathroom. But I need to clear my head, think before I re-enter the life I was meant to live. I aimlessly walk around, taking turns in hallway after hallway, admiring the framed pictures and paintings on the wall. Seeing them and the ones earlier today in Matthew’s condo makes me wish I could be artistic enough to create something stunning enough to be put up on other people’s walls.
But all I can do is dance a 1920’s fad and sing jazz songs and play the piano. Sounds glamorous, but they’re all old school. No one appreciates any of what I enjoy doing. It’s all about abstract art and women painted naked, Jack Dawson style.
I am turning another corner when I hear a strange sound. Stopping in my tracks, I listen closer to the sound. It sounds like moaning. Curious, I peek around the corner and gasp into my palm.
Jenna is making out with one of the waiters against a wall.
“What the hell?” I scream and step into visibility.
She gasps and stumbles back; the boy pants with a smile. She turns to me, her eyes widen, and she glances at the young boy. “It’s not what you think…”
“Seriously? I literally just caught you lip-locking with a boy who’s probably sixteen!”
“Seventeen next month,” the boy drawls, winking at me.
“Fuck off!” I shout at him.
“Whoa, calm down, lady.” Holding up his hands defensively, he leaves.
I turn back to the cheating-cheating woman in front of me. “You’re a horrible, horrible person.”
She starts crying, nodding. “I—I know.”
“Why can’t you just stick with your husband? Stick to the vows you promised? Were you lying then? Why be a lying bitch and fling yourself around?”
“You don’t understand. Garrett…he—he’s a really bad guy.”
“Can’t be as bad as you,” I retort. Is she seriously trying to blame her constant cheating on her husband? I mean, he’s an ass who’s been cheating too, but at least he isn’t blaming it on her. He’s open about it. She just goes around sucking faces with underage boys. It makes my stomach churn.
Her eyes water, and she shakes her head. “But he—”
“I don’t want to hear it!” I ball my hands into fists, wanting to punch her so badly. “Just stay away from my father, got it? He’s already dying. He doesn’t need this crap. You are poison, and I’ll be out of your hair and house as of now.”
“But Olivia—” she starts, stepping toward me, bawling her eyes out.
I slap her before I can stop myself. “Stay away from me. You should really confess before you go kissing your son’s friends next.”
Sick to my stomach, I turn on my heels and run all the way back to the party. Tears blur my eyes and my ankles burn, but I don’t stop running. I can’t believe what I just saw. I have to clear my head. Otherwise, I just might throw up out of anger.
I tell Matthew and Lily that I need fresh air, telling them where I’ll be so they don’t worry and can easily find me if they need to. Finding the entrance to the wrap-around balcony of the house, I step out into the cool December breeze. I wish I had my coat, but a butler took them from us as soon as we stepped into the house.
I lean against the marble balcony, looking out at the dark gardens—a fountain with a lion roaring water out of its mouth with surrounding lights illuminating a patch of hydrangeas.
How could she do that to my father? Be so selfish and brazen? She claims to love my father, to care for him. Yet she’s doing this. Not only betraying him, but her husband. I get that he’s weird and an asshole, but come on. My father is freaking dying, and she has the nerve to do this.
I’m so afraid to tell him—maybe I shouldn’t. Then again, he’d die thinking she actually loved him. And maybe she did, but it obviously turned into boredom as she’s turned to younger boys. Probably other men I don’t know about yet. I tug at my lower lip as I contemplate whether or not to tell him. I don’t want him to…to go in heartbreak. But should I allow him to think she truly loved him and him alone, when that’s obviously not the truth?
I grunt and slap my hands against my face, using my hair as a curtain to shield me from the real world. It’s too complicated for me at the moment.
Hearing a jazz song float among the chatter behind me, I start to cry. Damn my makeup. I miss Grey. I miss him so much. But I try not to thi
nk about him, how I last saw him. So deranged and truly resentful toward our “baby.” He would react the same way, and that’s what scares me.
I want everything with him, but he refuses it, refuses me. And I have to think about me. Ever since I met him, it’s been all about him. But what about me? I can’t be selfish toward myself, what I really, really want.
I wish I could get everything I want without losing the one person who makes me happy…
I let out a loud sob.
“Something troubling you, Miss Westerfield?” a voice asks me.
I look over my shoulder and face Garrett. He gently closes the patio door, frowning at me. Thinking about how embarrassing it is to be caught crying by my boss, I give off a nervous laugh and swipe under my eyes carefully.
“Yes. I’m fine. Thank you for asking.”
He doesn’t buy it and walks closer to me; I take a careful step back.
“Are you sure?” he asks. Something in his voice makes my skin tight, but I nod. Suddenly, he’s close enough that one more step forward and he’d be chest to chest with me.
“Garrett…?” I say, quieter than intended.
“You know, I thought it was crazy when I saw your file drop onto my desk. You know that entry I have to review before allowing you to enter the program? Yours was quite…something.” He chuckles, eyes scanning my face. “Never thought you had it in you. You looked so sweet in your file picture. So…innocent.”
My stomach churns. I don’t like how he’s talking.
“Garrett…?” I question him again, but he continues like he didn’t hear me.
“After what happened, I thought it would be only fair to let you in. Twice. And no one gets that opportunity. But you’ve been through oh so much, and you’re such a…a survivor. You only deserved it after what I did. And I tried to give you that NYU spot and the paid internship. I tried to give you the world.”
His hand reaches out, and he gently tucks a hair behind my ear. I freeze, my breathing pausing. My body is chanting something, but I can’t hear what. My blood is pumping wildly.
“What…what did you do?” My voice is strained, tears falling down my face.
Grey: Everlasting (Spectrum Series Book 6) Page 29