So Many Tears 2

by Nicole Jackson

  “Oh, for real,” she smiled. “Yall must’ve met at school.”

  “Hell, yeah. Nigga used to call me Richie Rich. Cause the schoolhouse was divided. Half the kids came from the nice houses while the other half came from the rough apartment complexes. So, some of my boys really thought that I was rich. Shit was crazy. They was fascinated with my life and my mama was fascinated with theirs.”

  “Why do you say that?” Kim wanted to know.

  “Cause after picking up my friends from Spice Lane a few times, she started hanging over there with their mamas. She swore that they were more fun than her co-workers and whatnot. Next thing I know, we in the hood all the time. All the niggas on the block know my mama. She was fucking with a few of ‘em. Moving them in and out of our house. At the time, I aint know no better and thought the shit was cool. Some of ‘em would even buy me shit. Eventually, one of them hoe ass niggas introduced her to powder, though,” he snarled at the memory. “But for the longest, she still managed to bring me out here to this park.”

  Kim nodded her head in understanding. This was a special place for him that would always hold sentimental value. Therefore, she felt honored to be let into such a vulnerable space.

  “And you know what, Kim?” he broke into her thoughts.

  “What’s up?” she asked inquisitively.

  “I know that sometimes I don’t be fair to you. Me hustling is not what you signed up for. You was just there for a nigga with no questions asked, and ended up pregnant. From there, shit just been happening, pushing you outside of your comfort zone. I know that this aint what you pictured yourself doing. I know this shit can be scary for you. I know that I don’t give you the time that I should. I be feeling your frustrations…more than I let on. I guess that’s why I try to make it up on the back end and spend all the bread you want. But that can only pacify you, especially when you never asked for it, anyway. I’m just caught in a whirlwind, right now, honestly. This shit is all new to me, from you, to the kids, to the money. But I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that nothing is more important than you and my kids. Nothing, man. So, when you getting tired of my shit, let’s just always come here and talk, okay? Cause the only other person I loved at this capacity is my mama, and she left me. I can’t have that happen again, Kim. Not with you. So, can you promise me?”

  Staring into his eyes, she stroked his chin. “Promise you what, exactly?”

  “Promise that you’ll always give me the chance to work this shit out. Promise that you’ll come here and talk to me. Get everything off our chests. Always try, before ever trying to let go.”

  Closing her eyes, she tucked her lips into her mouth. “You have my word. I promise.”

  ***

  Sitting in the middle of her bedroom floor, Indian style, wearing merely a camisole and PINK panties that could barely contain all her ass, Kim absently scrolled through Instagram on her iPhone. As of late, she’d been much more active on social media, which often reminded her of all the things she wasn’t doing.

  Kim’s lack of a social life was definitely due to her jumping off the porch late and having babies right after. There were pieces of a great story she was missing, as she’d dived head-first into motherhood. And now, with full financial support, she couldn’t say that her kids were preventing her from doing anything. Rashad paid her aunt Glenda without fail, so a sitter was never an issue. Frankly, when it boiled down to it, the problem was her.

  Although, she could put on a nice waist trainer before getting dressed, Kim still didn’t feel like her old fine self. Thankfully, Rashad had no complaints, but she wasn’t sure if he just hadn’t said anything to avoid hurt feelings. She’d gained thirty pounds since the kids and now had a small pooch in her stomach. She hated it with everything in her, and often times when she’d get dressed up and look at herself in the mirror, she’d get so discouraged that she’d undress, right after. Therefore, she could never bring herself to step out to the club with Anya and Rye these days. Heck, she was now ten pounds heavier than she was when she’d gone out to Rye’s family’s lake house. And now that she’d realized that Rye was well connected to socialites around the city, who were larger than life on social media, she was super self-conscious around Rye’s people. Every time Anya would link with Rye they’d go out to a club or event and surround themselves with wealth and celebrities. All the while nearly every second was Instasnapped and viewed around the globe. Kim wasn’t ready for the cameras to flash in her face, while people made a spectacle of the gut she totted around. Nope. She wasn’t stepping out, until she had her shit completely together.

  Glancing over the pictures posted on Anya’s page, she grew envious, as her girl seemed to be living it up without her. The night before Anya, Rye, and a crew of girls chilled at a swanky lounge, partying the night away. All the women were gorgeous and in shape, including Anya, reminding Kim of why it was best that she kept her ass at home. Never had she felt like this before, and after studying all those perfect figures, she had a strong urge to begin working out, right then and there.

  “Man, fuck this shit,” she uttered aloud, while placing her phone beside her.

  “Mommy,” Reanah babbled, as she wobbled over with her bottle in her mouth. It was early and she was just wearing an unsnapped onesie and diaper.

  “Girl, go back to sleep,” Kim mumbled, waving Reanah off, as she lied on her back. Criss crossing her arms across her breasts, she commenced to doing sit ups.

  “Horse-eeee!” Reanah boasted, as she straddled her, and bounced.

  Kim allowed her back to fall into the floor, as she huffed. “Really, little girl? Why won’t you let me be great? You see mommy is fat as hell.”

  “Say, you tripping.”

  Kim lifted her head, and her eyes landed on Rashad who was clearly wide awake. She could’ve sworn that his ass was just snoring in the bed a second ago. “Tripping about what?”

  “Come on, Kim. What did you just say?”

  She arched a brow. “That I was fat.”

  “And why would you say some shit like that?”

  “Cause,” she breathed, as she tugged at her shirt, attempting to drag it over her stomach. “It’s the truth.”

  Rashad shook his head. “Why do you do that shit, like I haven’t seen every inch of you?”

  “Because Rashad.”

  “Because what?” he pressed.

  “Because I didn’t have all this when you met me.”

  He sarcastically gasped. “No shit? You didn’t have my kids when I met you, either. Some shit done changed, huh?”

  Easing Reanah off her, Kim sat up. “Rashad, keep it real for a second. Now, you know damn well if you could choose between the body I have now and the body I had then, you’d chose my old body. So, don’t act like there aint room for improvement.”

  He shook his head, because she’d never get it. Yes, she had a small gut, but it was much bigger in her head than it was to him. It didn’t nothing to her curves. Her proportions were still intact, and her waist was still small, so he honestly didn’t care that she had a little gut. It wasn’t a big deal to him, but apparently, she didn’t like it. Her unhappiness with herself was becoming more noticeable, and if anything, that was a problem for him. Not the weight.

  “Look, bae, I aint trying to argue with you. To me, you the finest muthafucka around, but I get it. You gotta be alright with what you see in the mirror. So, let’s do something about it. We’ll go work out and shit. And if that don’t work, we got the bread. We can pay to get your shit as flat as you want it. I’m down with however you wanna do this shit. This your world.”

  Hearing that, Kim smiled from ear to ear. “However I wanna do it, huh? You got me, daddy?”

  “One hundred percent.”

  “Shit,” she hissed, as she snapped her legs closed.

  “What’s all that for?”

  She bit the corner of her bottom lip. “My clit just got to tingling out of nowhere.”

  He chuckled. “I got th
at pussy talking?”

  “Puthy talkin’,” Reanah mimicked.

  Kim gasped, as she glanced at her baby. “Girl.”

  Rashad shook his head. “See what you done did? Got me talking crazy in front of my baby.” He eased out of bed, wearing merely Versace briefs. Kneeling over, he swooped Reanah up and rained kisses all over her face, while she giggled uncontrollably. He then handed her off to Kim. “Bae, take her to Glenda.”

  Kim rolled her eyes as she stood up with Reanah in her arms. She was still trying to wrap her mind around the fact that her aunt practically lived with them now, as she was their full-time nanny, and had completely quit her job as a security guard. Obviously, Rashad paid more, although Kim felt like her aunt was getting free money half the time. Hell, it wasn’t like she actually went places too often without her kids, but Kim was grateful that her load was lighter with all the extra help around the house.

  Pulling back the bedroom door, she traveled through the house, until she found Glenda in the living room, holding baby Rashad. “Morning, auntie. I didn’t even hear you come in and get him.”

  “Morning,” Glenda yawned. “Yeah, yall were knocked out while my baby was wide awake. Him was looking for me,” she cooed, as she rocked the baby back and forth.

  Kim smirked, as she shook her head. “No, you just have him spoiled. Anyway, your niece wants to chill in here with you.” she placed Reanah on the couch next to Glenda.

  “Uh huh. You on birth control, right? Cause with the way that boy pokes on you—”

  “Yeah, I’m on the shot,” Kim cut her off. “Can’t you tell? I know you see it got me plump as hell.”

  Glenda patted baby Rashad’s bottom. “Well, that nigga must love it. With the way he be stuck up your ass—”

  “Anyway,” Kim sighed, as she strolled off.

  Stepping back into their bedroom, she felt her shirt roll up for the millionth time. Her ass and thighs jiggled, as she switched over to the bed.

  Rashad’s dick stood at attention, as he studied her sharp hips and fat pussy that sat between her thick thighs. He could literally get off with her merely standing there in her t-shirt and panties. Sitting up, he grabbed her hips, pulling her in. She placed a dainty hand on his shoulder, while he rolled her panties down. She then stepped out of them, while he removed her shirt.

  “Come’ere,” he urged, tugging her hand, helping her climb into the bed.

  Grabbing his chin, she hungrily kissed him. Frankly, his attraction for her turned her on to no end and motivated her to bring her all in the bedroom. Strangely, her insecurities were forgotten when they were intimate, because during this time, no one could tell her that she wasn’t the finest chick walking this earth.

  Unleashing his hard-on out of his briefs, Rashad lied on his back. Kim wasted no time straddling him. Teasingly, she rubbed her slickness on the side of his dick, warming him up. Sexily, she licked her own index finger, before bringing it between her thighs, stroking her clit. Rashad watched in awe, as she put on a show for him.

  Working her hips, she continuously taunted him, while pleasuring herself. Reaching down, she gripped his dick, and guided him inside of her. Sitting up on her tip toes, she grabbed her knees, and rode every inch of him.

  “Aww, shit,” he breathed, while gripping her ass. “Damn, bae.”

  Grabbing his hand, she placed it on her breast, while she arched her back.

  Biting his bottom lip, Rashad tried to think of something distracting, otherwise, he was going to bust, which would probably piss her off.

  “Bae, slow down. You know I can’t handle you on top for too long. I’m fuck around and fill your ass up.”

  Hearing that, Kim giggled, while squeezing her walls around him.

  “You think that shit…aw fuck…you that shit is funny, huh?” he asked, right before his cell rang. Grateful for the distraction, he lifted the phone off the nightstand.

  Before he could answer or deny the call, his cell was snatched right out of his hand.

  “Oh, hell no,” Kim clamored, as she answered the call without checking the screen. “Whoever this is needs to call back. Rashad is knee-deep in this pussy, and is tied up, ‘til further notice.” She ended the call without waiting for a response.

  He shook his head, while she rode him relentlessly, without missing a beat. “You just don’t give a fuck, C-girl. What if that was my grandma or somebody?”

  “Your grandma knows that you’re far from a virgin,” she responded, before resting her head on his shoulder. Hitting him with her signature move, she wobbled her ass, while he was deep inside of her.

  Clutching her ass with both hands, they could both hear that she was now sloppy wet. His balls smashed against her ass, while her pussy farted. Their toes both curled, as the bed rocked. Sweat glistened down Kim’s back, as she reached her climax. Squeezing her tightly, Rashad was right behind her, cumming hard.

  “Umm,” Kim moaned, as she softly kissed his lips, before grinning hard.

  Rashad softly chuckled. “What you smiling about?”

  “You.” she kissed him again. “And mornings like this. They always make me smile.”

  “Oh, okay. It’s this dick.”

  Resting her head on his shoulder, she nodded. “You know it.”

  He smiled brightly, as he gazed up at the ceiling. “That’s what’s up. That pussy keeps me smiling too. I can’t front.”

  “Yep. Well, at least we can keep it real.” Her clit thumped. “Now catch your breath, cause I need one more round.”

  Chapter 4

  The birds were chirping, and the sun was shining brightly, as Kim caught up with Anya and Rye.

  “Kim, I’m telling you, it was a fucking movie. You should’ve been there,” Anya carried on, as they jogged around the track in the local park.

  “It really was,” Rye co-signed, as she wiped the perspiration off her forehead.

  Kim rolled her eyes. “Yall say the same thing every time, and I keep telling yall the same thing. Let me shed these pounds first.”

  “Girl, bye,” Rye waved her off. “You gotta stop this ‘waiting ‘til tomorrow’ bullshit. Tomorrow aint damn promised. Besides, you’re real-life tripping. All my single cousins be asking about your big fine ass, and you’re worried about that small ass stomach of yours. You’re fucking crazy.”

  Kim pursed her lips, while both Anya and Rye truly thought that she was a little touched in the head. Donning a black and white Nike racer-back tee and leggings, her figure was on display, and in their eyes she was as fine as wine.

  “You really are a little throwed off, friend,” Anya offered.

  “Exactly. Besides, if you get out a little more, you’d work off those few pounds you want to shed. So, let’s go out. And put a hump in ya back and shake ya rump.” Rye grabbed her knees and twerked in the middle of the track.

  “Aye!” Anya abruptly dropped low, before wobbling her ass.

  Kim laughed heartily. “Now, see, yall be on some real thot shit. I’m a good sanctified, wholesome girl. And I don’t partake in such foolishness.”

  “Yeah, right, girl. Your two kids out of wedlock having ass be doing a whole lot of thotting over there with ole boy,” Rye alleged.

  “Nah, I was taken advantage of,” Kim joked.

  Anya stood upright. “Rye, don’t let this tramp fool you. She taught me all my hoe moves.”

  Kim narrowed her eyes. “Bitch, you talk too much. Besides, that was a long time ago.”

  Rye smiled. “Kim, show me some of those moves. I wanna see.”

  “Girl, you’ve seen me do a little something.”

  “No, I wanna see what you taught this hoe Anya,” Rye countered.

  “Nah—”

  “Oh, I get it. You done got too big to do that shit, huh?” Rye asked, while playfully elbowing Anya, while winking her eye.

  “Bitch please.” Kim gave her the finger.

  “Then let me see,” Rye insisted.

  “Alright, look, I’ma show you one thi
ng, and that’s it,” Kim claimed.

  “Okay,” Rye grinned.

  Slowly spreading her legs, Kim eventually dropped completely down to the ground, doing a Chinese split. She then simultaneously bounced her ass cheeks.

  “Aww, shit! You wasn’t lying, Anya. It’s always the fake-ass good ones,” Rye giggled.

  Kim tittered herself, until a familiar voice interrupted them.

  “Is this what you call working out?”

  Glancing over her shoulder, Kim spotted Rashad approaching them. “What are you doing here?”

  “I stopped by the house to check on yall and Glenda told me that you was up here, walking,” he responded.

  “Oh,” Kim sighed, as she climbed to her feet.

  “What’s up?” Rashad spoke to Anya and Rye.

  “Hey,” they replied in unison.

  He looked Kim up and down. “Sexy, they’re pumping you up to shake that fat ass?”

  She giggled, as he made her blush. “What? No—”

  “Then what was you doing?” he moved in on her, wrapping his arm around her waist. He snuggled his nose into the crook of her neck.

  “Rashad,” she whined. “I’m sweaty.”

  “So,” he kissed her. “Why you out here showing off your tricks and shit?” he whispered. “I thought that you only did that on the dick.”

  “Move,” she pouted. “See, that’s why I don’t come out here with you now. You never let me really work out.”

  “Cause,” he sighed, as he eased a hand in her shirt.

  Shaking their heads, Anya and Rye jogged off, giving them their space.

  “See,” Kim sucked her teeth. “Look at what you did. They’re leaving me.”

  “You can catch up with them later. Come to the truck for a minute. Let me show you something.”

  She cut her eyes at him. “Really, Rashad?”

  “Yeah, come on,” he insisted, grabbing her hand.

  “Uh uh,” she refused, pulling her hand back. Wearing a sneaky grin, she bit her bottom lip. “Come catch me first.”

  “What?” he furrowed his brows, before she jotted across the grass. He shook his head. “Oh, you wanna play, huh?”