Under Your Influence

by Jaxson Kidman

“Yeah. Just wait until my credit card bill comes.”

  “I can pay you back…”

  “My treat, darling,” he said.

  He brushed his lips against mine.

  The feeling that rushed through me was dangerous.

  “I’m sorry you went through what you did,” I said to him. “With…”

  “Karen.”

  “Fuck Karen and Brian,” I said.

  “Yeah. They’re the worst.”

  “Do you like your job?”

  “What?”

  “Do you like being a cop?”

  “Of course I do.”

  “Then you should never have to give that up.”

  “It is dangerous,” Tyler said. He stroked my cheek. “I mean, there are times when it’s… it’s rough. I can imagine the stress it would put on the person with me.”

  He stared into my eyes.

  “If it makes you happy, you should do it.”

  “You make me happy,” he said.

  “And you’ve made me. Several times.”

  “With several more to go,” he said. “I hope. I know we have-”

  My phone buzzed on the nightstand.

  Habit made me look, in case it was a client.

  It was Brian.

  Texting me.

  “Oh, shit,” I said as I sat up.

  “What?” Tyler asked.

  “Brian wants to know if he and I could talk.”

  “You don’t have to leave,” I said as I ran after Tyler.

  “Yeah, I do,” he said. “I’m going to go into work or something.”

  “Tyler, I’m at your house,” I said. “I’m leaving.”

  “He’s there?”

  “Yeah. He wants to talk.”

  “And you feel you have stuff to say to him?”

  “I don’t know,” I said. “I mean, what happened… I wanted to make him jealous. But I want to have a serious talk with him. He needs to know everything. I still have stuff in his house I have to get.”

  Tyler nodded.

  He opened the front door. “Then I guess you need to get back to him.”

  “Are you jealous right now?”

  “Me?” Tyler asked. “Please, darling. We served our purpose here. Right? You got your mind off him. You got back at him. You know you’re strong enough to live without him.”

  “What about you?”

  “I’m the guy you fuck after your heart gets broken,” Tyler said.

  “What about this?” I asked and showed my left hand.

  “What about it? You don’t even remember it, Harper. As far as you’re concerned, it never happened. We can make the arrangements to get it all taken care of.”

  “That doesn’t mean we can’t…”

  “If you’re asking me to be friends with benefits, I don’t do that,” Tyler said. “But if you need a good fuck, I’m always available.”

  “This is crazy,” I said. “You’re acting like a jerk.”

  “I’m always a jerk.”

  “Not like this. You’re pushing me away.”

  “You left the bed, darling,” he said. “Not me.”

  “You’re jealous. And you’re too stubborn to admit it. You think you’re so tough.”

  “Either leave or get back in my bed, naked.”

  “Whatever, Tyler,” I said. “I thought this was something real.”

  “It served its purpose.”

  I rushed out of the house and looked back. “If you actually have to work tonight, please be careful. Because I feel it, Tyler. The worry. The fear. The ache of you getting hurt.”

  “Thanks,” he said. “Good luck with Brian.”

  Tyler shut the door.

  I was alone.

  I didn’t want to be alone.

  I wanted him.

  I wanted the marriage to be real.

  26

  (Tyler)

  I was lifting weights, trying to punish myself.

  That wasn’t my style. At least not lately. The last time I did something like this…

  I put the bar down and stood up. I walked over to the punching bag and unloaded on it. It was brutal. Something inside me started to snap.

  I told Harper everything.

  That wasn’t part of whatever the hell plan this had been.

  There was no plan though.

  There never was.

  Harper was beautiful. Heartbroken. I took a chance and she showed up for a drink. It took two shots of whiskey before she started talking about her ex. And it wouldn’t stop. The guy had really crushed her. And I understood it. When she finally took a breath, I moved in for a kiss. Just to remind her that she was still alive and she was still beautiful.

  A few shots later, things got hotter.

  And the rest became some sense of history.

  She had gotten what she wanted out of me though.

  I mended her heart enough to stand strong. I showed her what it was like to be properly loved. How to take charge of her body and her needs. So, the next time that Brian guy fucked her, she would be able to tell him what to do and how to do it. She wouldn’t just be there, unsure of it all.

  The thought of someone touching Harper set me off into another fury of punches.

  I kept going until an arm hooked mine and turned me around.

  “The fuck you doing?” Cap growled in my face.

  His eyes were stone cold. Almost evil. That’s what the job did to him.

  “Working out.”

  “The fuck you are,” he said.

  “Cap, are we ready or what?” Joey’s voice echoed from the doorway.

  “Where you headed?” I asked.

  “It’s time,” Cap said. “We have to make our move.”

  “I”m coming, right?”

  “Your head don’t look straight, Tyler,” Cap said.

  “Fuck that. I’ve been waiting for this. You know that, Cap.”

  “I heard you have other priorities at home now,” Cap said.

  “No, I don’t,” I said. “That was something fun. It came and went.”

  Cap stepped back. He looked at Joey. “You trust him?”

  “With my life, Cap,” Joey said.

  “Right. You two ride together. We’re taking this asshole down tonight. It’s not a walk in the park. We had an informant fuck up and CK knows we’re on him.”

  “That’s fine,” I said. “I’ve done these before. We’ll find a way around it.”

  “This guy means business,” Cap said. “He’s desperate. He knows if we don’t take him down, the higher ups will. If he called for any help…”

  “Cap, we’re good,” Joey said. “We have it all set up. We can wait all night. The second that asshole lets his guard down, we go in.”

  “Why the urgency now?” I asked.

  “Two bodies full of bullet holes,” Cap said.

  Cap walked out of the gym and Joey stared me down. “You good?”

  “Fine.”

  “Problems with the wife?”

  “There is no wife,” I said.

  “Thought you were married…”

  “Long story,” I said.

  “We might have a long night ahead of us,” Joey said.

  “Good,” I said. “Let’s go.”

  Joey walked away.

  I had to get changed and ready. My job never made me nervous or worried. It was what I signed up for. Sometimes you could just pull someone over like normal and sometimes that someone could try to hurt you. This guy we were going after - CK - was a bad guy. He wouldn’t go down without a fight. That was just how it went.

  I grabbed my gym bag and when I picked it up, the wedding band fell to the floor. I stared for a second and swallowed hard.

  Serves me right for getting involved with a pretty, brokenhearted girl at a bar.

  But it didn’t matter now.

  I loved her.

  We sat in the unmarked car together, me as the driver. No way in hell I was going to let Joey drive me around. We were dressed in black
with black caps, sitting across the street from a shithole of an apartment building. CK was on the third floor with a bunch of his guys. The plan was to wait and check activity.

  Cap was in a van around the corner and there was a slew of backup ready to come when the signal was given.

  My right hand twitched, wanting to call or text Harper.

  This was the first time the job was getting to me. Because of the woman I loved. The woman I really loved.

  “You’re acting like before,” Joey said.

  “What?”

  “With Karen.”

  “Leave it go or I’ll shoot you.”

  “No, you won’t. You’re full of shit.”

  “Joey, I swear…”

  “You don’t have Kordell as the voice of reason now,” Joey said. “It’s just me. I call it as I see it.”

  “And what does that mean?”

  “You and Karen were fake. I’m glad she fucked someone else.”

  I gritted my teeth. “You don’t want to live through tonight, huh?”

  “But the look on your face with Harper… shit, man, that was intense. I could feel the heat between you two. Hell, I was getting turned on a little.”

  “You’re an asshole,” I said.

  “Whatever happened, don’t let it get fucked up for good.”

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said.

  “Then let me in,” Joey said. “We trust each other with our lives because of the badge. But beyond that… you have a wall up.”

  “For good reason,” I said. “I’m not looking for a friend. Shut up and do your job.”

  “You let her slide away and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life, Tyler.”

  I grabbed Joey’s shoulder. “Maybe she was never mine to begin with. Huh? You get that? I helped make her ex jealous. Okay? And it worked. She’s where she’s supposed to be and I’m where I’m supposed to be.”

  “But you fell for her,” Joey said. “You dumbass. You fell for her.”

  “It doesn’t fucking matter,” I said.

  I pushed Joey into the door and stared out the window.

  The main door to the apartment building opened and out came two guys.

  Each with a lit cigarette, one with a gun.

  “Shit,” Joey said.

  The door opened again and out came someone else. I’d seen his face in pictures.

  It was CK.

  He looked around and looked ready for a war.

  I curled my lip.

  I was ready for a fucking war too.

  Joey looked at me and nodded.

  I nodded back. “Here we go…”

  27

  (Harper)

  Brian waited at my door like an obedient dog. I felt like punching him, so I stuck my hands into my pockets. That also meant I was hiding the engagement ring and wedding band. I wasn’t even sure what they meant at this point though. I had never seen Tyler act like that before.

  Maybe because you’ve known him for like two seconds, Harper.

  My mind had played a hundred scenarios.

  That Tyler had gotten jealous out of love. But how could he love me that quick? I was just some drunk woman at a bar with a broken heart and a crazy idea to get married to make my ex pissed off.

  Or that Tyler had gotten jealous because that’s who he was.

  He confessed what happened with his previous relationship and it made my heart squeeze, but there were always two sides to every story. That included a relationship. And a break up.

  I looked at Brian and frowned.

  “Can we go inside?” he asked.

  “Sure,” I said.

  I opened the door, realizing he still had a key to my apartment. He could have gone inside but didn’t.

  “Drink?” I asked.

  “No,” he said. “I’m not here to play any games, Harper.”

  “Okay. What do you want then?”

  Without warning, Brian moved at me.

  I jumped back, ready to punch him if need be.

  He grabbed my left wrist and pulled my hand out of my pocket. “Explain this. Now.”

  “Fuck you,” I said. “I don’t owe you an explanation about anything.”

  “You’re not married,” he said. “This is a joke. To get back at me.”

  “It’s real,” I said. “I married Tyler on Valentine’s Day. Well, it was probably the morning after by the time we were officially married.”

  “What did you do this for?” Brian screamed.

  He came at me again and I swung my hand, slapping him so hard across the face he spun around and fell to his knees.

  I gasped.

  I was in shock.

  I had never hit a guy before. Ever.

  My hand stung but I ignored the pain.

  “You don’t get to ask me that,” I said. “Ever. Fuck you for what you did to me.”

  Brian lifted his head and looked at me. He blinked fast. He was crying.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry, Harper.”

  He climbed to his feet and kept his distance.

  “It’s too late for that,” I said.

  “No, it’s not. I fucked up. We grew distant a long time ago. And I never addressed it. We never addressed it. We were just… together. Everything implied.”

  His words made me think about Tyler and his story with Karen.

  “No,” I said. “That’s not a good enough excuse.”

  “It’s not an excuse, Harper. I don’t want to take shots at each other right now. Tell you everything I was upset about. Have you do it to me.”

  “Then what the fuck are you doing here?” I asked.

  My words choked up a little.

  You’re beautiful, Harper. You’re strong, Harper. You can take care of yourself, Harper.

  The voice in my head was no longer mine.

  It was Tyler’s voice.

  Everything he had done for me in such a short amount of time was so much more than anyone else I had ever met in my life.

  Brian stepped toward me.

  He touched my arms and nodded. “You win.”

  “I win?”

  “You win. You made me jealous. You drove me fucking crazy. I can’t marry her.”

  “What?”

  “I can’t marry Daisy. No way. I want to marry you, Harper. I see that now. What Daisy and I have is fake. It’s my way of trying to fix my heart. I’m hurting too. I lost you a long time ago. And I did not fix it. I was weak.”

  “So, you fucked someone at work? You proposed to her the night you dumped me.”

  “I should have never done that. Ever. And I see that now, Harper. I needed this. We needed this.”

  “We?”

  “Yeah. I was with someone else. You were with someone else. We got it out of our system. Now we can move forward. If the marriage thing is real, I’ll pay to have it fixed. I’ll do anything for you, Harper. You win.”

  Brian slowly dropped to one knee.

  My eyes went wide.

  He’s going to propose to me…

  Brian dropped his other knee.

  No. He’s going to beg me…

  “Harper, I will do anything. For the rest of my life. For you. For us. I will tell you everything you want to know. I don’t love her the way I love you.”

  “Did you tell her that?” I asked.

  “What?”

  “Where is Daisy right now?”

  “Sleeping.”

  “You told her you were coming here?”

  “No.”

  “Get out your phone. Tell her you don’t love her.”

  “She’s sleeping. She won’t answer. I’ll text her.”

  You pussy.

  “Fine,” I said. “Text her.”

  Brian stayed on his knees as he typed away on his phone.

  He showed me the screen.

  “Let me send it,” I said.

  “Okay,” he said with a smile.

  I took his phone and read the messa
ge again.

  It was clear as day… asking Daisy to marry him was a mistake. That he loved me forever and I was the only one that mattered. That he was sorry for leading her on. But there was no way in hell he was ever going to choose Daisy over me.

  It was a pretty powerful message.

  Daisy was going to read it and get the point.

  There was no coming back from this.

  I grinned and sent the message.

  I handed Brian his phone back.

  “There,” he said. “It’s done.”

  “Get up,” I said to him.

  Brian scrambled to his feet.

  I didn’t have to look up at him as much as I did for Tyler.

  His shoulders were boney. Like the rest of him. Except his gut. Pasta and fancy beer did the job there.

  And, yeah, I was picking him apart the way he had done to me.

  “I love you, Harper,” he said.

  His hands touched my cheeks.

  “You were fucking her for so long,” I whispered.

  “We grew apart. You know that. It wasn’t love. It was a distraction. Just like you had. You get it, right? You met some muscle guy and… I don’t even care. I just want you.”

  I smiled. “That’s great to hear.”

  Brian inched forward to kiss me.

  At the last second, I stepped back.

  I put my hands to his chest and shoved him back.

  “Harper?” he asked.

  “Get the fuck out of here,” I said. “You dumb piece of trash.”

  “What?”

  “I wouldn’t kiss you if you were the last person in the world,” I said. “I wouldn’t let you touch me if you were the last person in the world. I wouldn’t… you’re pathetic. You’re weak. You’re… small. Everywhere.”

  Brian’s eyes went wide. “You set me up. You made me type that message…”

  I shrugged my shoulders. “Oops.”

  “You bitch,” he growled.

  He took a step and I took two toward him. I made a fist and cocked it back.

  Brian flinched and put his hands up. “Okay, don’t hit me. Jesus. Harper.”

  “I said to get out. Or I’ll call the police. Actually, my husband is a cop.”

  “That guy is a cop?” Tyler asked.

  “And if you even so much as text me ever again, I’ll have him track you down. I’ll have him, and his guys wait for you to go a little too fast or not stop long enough at a stop sign. I’ll have them write you so many tickets you’ll be riding a fucking tricycle around town.”