The Cowboy's Christmas Baby

by Cathy McDavid

  And like before, Jewel had been distracted by Tanner’s presence at the arena fence, his gaze on her steady. They hadn’t parted on the best of terms Saturday after the barrel racing competition at the Poco Dinero. Talk of Ava’s custody and his cheating tended to have that effect on them. As a result, his Sunday and Monday visits with Ava had been brief.

  Today would likely be no different, which saddened Jewel. They had to reach a resolution, for Ava’s sake if for no other reason. She shouldn’t suffer because her parents couldn’t resolve their differences.

  Jewel had spent much of yesterday, when she wasn’t working or caring for Ava, on the phone attempting to retain an attorney. The task, hard to begin with, had been made more difficult by her uncertainty about whether to hire someone from Oklahoma or Arizona.

  She still didn’t know where she’d wind up after the New Year. Between emails, phone calls and video chats, she supposed face-to-face meetings weren’t a necessity. Still, she’d prefer to sit down with her attorney and establish a rapport.

  For that reason, and on the advice of her father, she’d ultimately chosen an Arizona-based attorney. They had an appointment later today for an initial consultation and to sign the paperwork. Even if Emily didn’t offer Jewel a permanent photography job at Sweetheart Ranch and she wound up returning to rodeoing, she could stick around and help her parents when she wasn’t competing. During the last week, their desire to purchase a winter home here had gone from probably to a matter of finding the right house.

  And, she reminded herself, she’d need to be here to attend any necessary court hearings. The thought that she’d soon be negotiating with Tanner for custody of Ava made her heart hurt. How had she and Tanner gotten to this point?

  During a phone call with Tanner last evening about the gift exchange at the pre-Christmas brunch at Jewel’s place, she’d informed him that she was hiring an attorney and had given him the woman’s contact information. He, in turn, had given her the name and number of his attorney, something she hadn’t expected.

  An invisible band squeezed her middle, cutting off her oxygen. Tanner was really and truly pursuing shared custody. A part of her had secretly wished he wouldn’t, that he would let her retain full custody.

  At the end of the phone call, he’d surprised her by mentioning a disagreement with his brother during a Sunday shopping trip. When she’d asked what the disagreement was about, he’d been vague.

  Not for the first time, Jewel questioned the newly strained relationship between the Bridwell brothers. Her instincts told her something other than Daniel’s battle with cancer and Tanner’s attempt to bribe the bull riding judge were responsible. Odd, really. She’d have assumed problems like theirs would bring siblings closer, not push them apart. Then again, her and Tanner’s problems had driven a wedge between them.

  Teddy Bear snorted as he and Jewel drew up beside Ronnie. When she pulled on the reins, he bobbed his head and pawed the ground, not quite ready to quit for the day.

  “You started out a little slow,” Ronnie observed. She was all business today. A far cry from the glowing, dazzling taffeta-swathed bridesmaid Jewel had photographed this past weekend. “But then you found your rhythm.”

  “Guess we needed to warm up.” Jewel didn’t admit that the reason for her slow start was that it took place in Tanner’s regular spot at the far end of the arena, his arresting eyes fastened on her.

  “I heard good things from the other students about your second place run at the Poco Dinero.”

  The remark brought a smile to Jewel’s face. She’d already added her winnings to her rodeo fund. The sport wasn’t inexpensive.

  “You’ve been to the Double Eights Rodeo in Apache Junction, right?” Ronnie asked. “It’s in early January.”

  “A few times.”

  “Might be a good place to get your feet wet. I’m taking a couple of my students. We could all drive together.”

  Jewel instantly straightened in the saddle, a mixture of excitement and anxiety coursing through her. Despite being a month away, with lots of practice opportunities between now and then, it felt right around the corner. And what about Ava? She’d either have to find a babysitter or take her along. Then there was the matter of Tanner. He’d probably want to accompany them. Or insist on keeping Ava during Jewel’s absence.

  “Let me think about it.”

  “Don’t take too long,” Ronnie cautioned.

  “I won’t. I promise.”

  If she dallied, she might lose her nerve and manufacture excuses not to go. She was about to ride off when Ronnie delayed her.

  “I saw the wedding pictures from Saturday.”

  “Did you like them?”

  Jewel had spent much of Sunday organizing the pictures and uploading them to the bride and groom’s wedding website.

  “You did an incredible job. I had no idea how talented you were.”

  Jewel’s smile widened. “Thanks.”

  “I mean it. Yours are some of the best wedding photographs I’ve seen. I don’t want to lose a student, but, seriously, you could make a living at photography.”

  “I don’t know about that.” Could she?

  “My cousin’s thrilled. She was sharing pictures from her phone yesterday while they were waiting for their flight to Cancun.”

  “I do love hearing about happy customers.”

  The bride and groom had called Jewel yesterday, apparently from the airport, to let her know the pictures had been successfully uploaded and that they loved them. Hearing their praise echoed by someone else made it all the sweeter.

  “Do you ever freelance and take nonwedding pictures?” Ronnie asked.

  “You mean like events?”

  “I was thinking of portraits. My dad and stepmom’s anniversary is coming up. I’m stuck for a gift idea. Looking at the wedding pictures gave me one.”

  “I’d love to. In fact, I’m taking a portrait of Emily’s family tonight. The whole O’Malley-Foxworthy clan.”

  Jewel didn’t add that she might be leaving Mustang Valley in the near future. That conversation could come later, once she decided. At the moment, she was leaning toward staying, even if she didn’t get the job at Sweetheart Ranch.

  Ronnie’s next student trotted over, ready for her lesson. Jewel waved goodbye to her and Ronnie before turning Teddy Bear in Tanner’s direction. She assumed he wanted to confirm his visit with Ava today. Ava and Tracee hadn’t come this morning and were staying indoors. The temperature had dropped drastically during the night, and Jewel didn’t want her little baby catching a chill.

  She passed several riders on her way to where Tanner waited. Out of habit, she mentally assessed each one, deciding if they were barrel racers, trail riders, beginners or experienced. The ranch was busier than usual. Jewel had heard from Tracee that schools and colleges were on semester break. The teenager had taken her last final exam the previous Friday.

  Jewel was feeling considerably better when she approached Tanner, thanks to her talk with Ronnie and the positive feedback about her photography. Oh, and the possibility of an anniversary portrait.

  One look at his expression, however, and her worry returned tenfold. Not because he scowled or glared at her. Just the opposite. He studied her with the same glad-to-see-you delight he had when they’d been together. In response, Jewel experienced the same happy hitch inside she always had, desperately wishing her faith in him could be restored.

  Danger, danger, her internal voice warned. Feelings like these were confusing and troublesome and needed to end. More than once recently, she’d caught him reaching for her hand, only to withdraw. Thank goodness he had. She had no clue how she’d have responded if his fingers had linked with hers.

  Watching the corners of his very sexy mouth curve into a smile reminded her of their near kiss in her quarters and his suggestion that it might uncomplicate their situa
tion. Jewel didn’t think he could be more wrong. Especially with Ava’s custody undetermined.

  His delight intensified the closer she got. A flush of heat warmed her skin beneath her jacket, countering the effects of the recent cold snap.

  Uh-oh. Maybe she should return to Oklahoma. It would make the custody issue more difficult but also create a safe distance between them.

  Unless he joined her there. Would he leave his family? His job? To be near Ava, she thought he might.

  “Good morning,” he said when she dismounted.

  Jewel kept hold of the reins. “I need to walk Teddy Bear.”

  “I’ll come with you.”

  Naturally. What else had she expected? Was it possible, despite having spent the last few minutes warning herself to tread carefully where the two of them were concerned, that deep down she’d wanted him to come with her?

  Too late now to say no. “All right.”

  Without any discussion, they began walking Jewel’s customary circuit of the horse barn. In this weather, it was vitally important that Teddy Bear be properly cooled down after his grueling workout. Before her lesson this morning, she’d unearthed his blanket from the horse trailer. She didn’t want her horse baby catching a chill, either.

  Speaking of which... She zipped her own jacket. She, too, was feeling the drop in temperature. That, or she required a barrier between her and her companion. His delighted expression had yet to change.

  “What’s your schedule for the rest of the day?” Tanner asked. “I have to stick close to the ranch for the next couple of hours. We have some potential clients coming by.”

  “I’m working from two to four. Then I have an early evening session scheduled with Emily and her family for a holiday portrait. If I don’t have to postpone—Tracee may go skating at the ice rink with some friends.”

  “I’ll watch Ava.”

  “I, um...” Her bad. She should have seen that coming. “I suppose that’d be okay.”

  Portrait sessions didn’t normally last long. Surely Tanner could babysit Ava for an hour or less without any problems, despite his lack of experience. She’d likely be asleep for the night or ready for sleep.

  A thought occurred to Jewel. “Will you be off work by then?” The ranch was busy, and Tanner sometimes handled the evening feeding.

  “I’ll take a short lunch so I can quit early.”

  He spoke as if the arrangement was a done deal. Jewel told herself not to make a fuss. This was just one of the many concessions with Tanner she’d be making. Still, she resisted. The idea of him taking care of Ava made her think about shared custody and her being separated from Ava by hundreds, if not thousands, of miles.

  They were leaving the horse barn after putting Teddy Bear in his stall when they met up with a pair of teenaged girls carrying halters. Jewel recognized them from Saturday’s barrel racing event and guessed them to be high school students or recently graduated.

  She said hello, and the four of them paused to converse. Okay, she and the girls conversed. Tanner stood off to the side, his back propped against the barn wall, his shoulders hunched. She noticed he tugged the brim of his ball cap low over his eyes.

  “Congratulations, by the way,” the taller of the girls said, referring to Jewel’s second-place win at the Poco Dinero.

  “Thanks. I kind of wish that hadn’t been the last of the rodeo events until after the holidays. I could use the experience.”

  “It’s not. There’s one this coming weekend at the Cave Creek Rough Stock Rental Company,” the second girl said, fiddling with her pink-dyed hair.

  “Don’t they lease livestock to rodeos?”

  “Every other month they have semiprofessional calf roping, bull riding, bronc riding and barrel racing contests.”

  “We’re going.” The taller girl tugged on Jewel’s arm. “You should sign up. Barrel racing’s on Saturday.”

  Funny that Ronnie hadn’t said anything. Then again, she’d just been in a big wedding.

  “Maybe.”

  In truth, Jewel doubted she’d go. She was free; her only wedding on that day would finish by midafternoon. But Tracee wasn’t available to babysit because of family holiday obligations. Her glance cut to Tanner for a brief moment.

  “I heard from Ronnie you’re thinking of returning to the circuit in January,” the girl with pink hair mentioned.

  “Hmm.” Jewel shrugged. “That remains to be seen.”

  “I’d love to compete professionally. Except my parents will freak if I don’t go to college. You have to get an education,” she said in a low voice and wagged a finger in what Jewel assumed was an imitation of her father.

  Her friend, also fresh faced and bubbly, bumped shoulders with her. “Mine, too. But I’m not good enough. To compete professionally, that is.”

  “You went to the NFR last year, right?” the girl with pink hair asked Jewel. “You were number one in...what state?”

  “Oklahoma.”

  “Right. I saw a video online.”

  Which video? Jewel mused. The one of her flubbing her qualifying run or the one of her and Tanner being accosted by a group of angry bull riders while leaving the event grounds?

  “Why’d you stop competing?”

  Like they didn’t know.

  “I had a baby.” Jewel offered her standard response.

  It wasn’t untrue. Even if she and Tanner hadn’t ended their engagement, she’d have taken a break from barrel racing during her pregnancy.

  She noticed him shifting uncomfortably whenever the girls happened to glance his way. Did they recognize him? If yes, they gave no indication.

  “Oh, wow! That’s right,” the girl with pink hair exclaimed. “I saw you the other day with a stroller.”

  To Jewel’s vast relief, the taller girl announced that they’d best hurry and goodbyes were exchanged.

  “See you around.”

  “Have a merry Christmas.”

  Tanner pushed off the barn once the girls had moved on. Their high-pitched voices easily carried through the barn.

  “You know who that guy is, don’t you?” the taller girl asked her friend. “Tanner Bridwell. He’s the bull rider who got caught cheating. He and Jewel were gonna get married.”

  “You’re right. I didn’t recognize him at first.” The girl with the pink hair gasped loudly. “He must be her baby daddy.”

  “Ew. Why would she still be with a loser like him?”

  “She seems really sweet. I bet she has to put up with him whether she likes it or not.”

  Jewel caught them sneaking peeks at her and Tanner over their shoulders. Memories from last year assailed her, and she willed herself not to slink away.

  The girls continued ahead until whatever else they said couldn’t be heard. Angry sparks crackled in the air surrounding Tanner, and his mouth compressed into a hard line.

  Yeah, well, Jewel was mad, too. At Tanner for causing this untenable and unbearable situation. At herself for being seen with him when she’d known spending time together was a bad idea. At the two girls for their cruel and careless remarks, and at the arena owners for constantly holding a hammer over Tanner’s head.

  “Sorry about that,” he muttered when they exited the barn.

  “When is it going to stop?” She spoke with more venom than she’d intended. “I was a fool to think I could get back into competition.”

  “People will grow tired of talking about us eventually.”

  She whirled on him. “When exactly? A year from now? Five years? Ten? Rodeo is a small world. Two high school students who aren’t even serious competitors have watched videos of us online, for Pete’s sake. And your disguise didn’t fool them for one second. They’re probably posting on social media right now. Guess you can stop lying low.”

  “Actually, there’s nothing I’d like better.�
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  She hardly heard him. “Can you imagine what it would be like if you came with me on the circuit?”

  “I’ll stay out of the way.”

  “And what happens when Ava’s older and she hears remarks like those? Or, God forbid, she’s teased? Bullied? Do you want to be the one explaining to her that her dad tried to win a bull riding championship by bribing a judge?”

  He stared at Jewel, his gaze unyielding, his form seeming to swell in size as his fury visibly rose.

  Jewel almost took a step back. Had she gone too far? Said too much?

  Big deal. What if she had? She was right on all counts.

  “I’d tell her the truth,” he said in a low voice like sharpened steel.

  “Which is what? Sorry, honey,” she said in a singsong voice, “your dad didn’t have the guts to win honestly and chose to cheat instead.”

  Jewel was almost shouting. It was as if she and Tanner were back in that Vegas hotel room, the one that was supposed to have been their honeymoon getaway, and she was insisting he pack his bags and get the heck out.

  How dare he ruin their lives? How dare he throw away everything they had and then go into hiding, leaving her to endure the backlash? How dare he...he...leave her and tear her heart clean in half? She’d loved him. And he’d supposedly loved her.

  Except he hadn’t. He’d proven that.

  Tanner said nothing, his jaw silently working.

  “Is that what you’d tell her?” Jewel demanded.

  She was about to storm off when Tanner brought her to a grinding halt with his next words.

  “I’d tell Ava I didn’t cheat or try to cheat by bribing a judge.”

  Jewel snorted a laugh. “You’d lie to her.”

  “No. I would never lie to her.” His expression remained stony. “I would never cheat, either. I’m not that kind of person.”

  “You confessed. To me and to the officials.”

  “I didn’t try to bribe that judge, Jewel. It wasn’t me. I swear.”

  She stared at him in disbelief. “The judge identified you.”