A part of him did wish, like Jewel, he could do both. Pursue his dream and earn a decent wage. It likely wasn’t possible.
“I’ll have to attend some rodeos,” she said.
“You’re returning to the circuit, then?”
“No. Here’s the best part. Emily offered me a permanent job. I said yes!”
This explained her parents’ weird behavior. And why she wasn’t angry at him about preferring Ava stay in Arizona.
“Good.” His chest grew tight with an unexpected surge of emotion. Jewel was staying, and he wouldn’t have to battle her for Ava’s shared custody.
Apparently, she’d read his mind. “You won’t need that clause about me moving out of state.”
The remark was meant to be funny, but Tanner couldn’t quite return her banter. She may be working in Arizona for the present. That could change, and with their relationship constantly on the up and down, he wasn’t taking any chances.
Rather than mentioning that, he asked, “Will you be looking for a different place to live?”
“Soon. Ava will be crawling in the next few months, and we’ll need more space. Plus, the stairs worry me.”
“What about barrel racing?”
“I don’t see how I can. I’ll be working weddings most weekends, though I am going to have to attend some rodeos if I want to freelance for Oklahoma Rodeo News. I’ll know more in a week or two when I talk to them.”
“Are you okay giving up barrel racing?”
“I am,” she said with conviction. “I love photography. I’ll still do it for fun, of course, and to keep Teddy Bear in shape.”
Ava eventually stopped playing with the toy and drifted off to sleep. Jewel continued her stream of chatter, wondering if she could obtain a press pass for rodeos and how she’d rearrange her schedule to accommodate Ava’s child care.
“It’ll be easier with my parents nearby for five months of the year. They can babysit.”
Her parents? What about him? “I’ll watch Ava.”
Jewel blinked and straightened as if she’d just remembered they’d be sharing custody. “Ah...yeah. Sure.”
“Is that a problem?”
“No. Not per se.”
“How is your parents watching Ava different than me? I’m getting pretty good at feeding and diaper changing.”
“It’s not that,” she insisted.
“Still not ready to relinquish control?”
“No, it’s not that!”
Really? Tanner thought so. It was that or, despite her objections to the contrary, she was continuing to use Ava as a bargaining chip.
“But you’re working, too,” she added. “And might not always be available to babysit.”
“In that case, we decide together.”
“I’m Ava’s primary caregiver. You agreed to that in the custody agreement. You can’t expect me to consult you on every little decision.”
“I can when it comes to who’s watching her. Especially when we live in the same town, minutes away from each other.”
Her brows shot up, and she stiffened. Apparently, she hadn’t anticipated any resistance.
“I’ve been fair and reasonable, Jewel, and generous with child support. And I’ll keep being fair and reasonable as long as you are, too.”
He was right, and Jewel knew it. His attorney had gone so far as to suggest, should Jewel balk, they bring up the point that she’d failed to inform his parents of her pregnancy when she’d had the chance. Tanner didn’t like the idea of fighting dirty and refused. Both he and Jewel were at fault for what happened between them. They were also both right about certain things.
“I don’t want to turn the custody settlement into a circus.” She gazed at him imploringly. “This was supposed to be a night of celebration. Emily offered me a job, and I’m staying in Mustang Valley.”
He instantly regretted bristling. “I’m sorry. I’ve been on edge since the bull riding event.”
“That’s my fault. I was wrong to start an argument with you.” She reached for his hand. “Truce?”
“Yeah.” He linked their fingers. “Truce.”
“I really want this to be a wonderful Christmas for us.”
“Me, too.”
To Tanner’s disappointment, she extracted her hand. He took that as his cue to leave and, pushing away from the table, went over to the crib. Reaching in, he rubbed his knuckles along Ava’s satiny cheek.
“Sleep tight, honey pie.”
Jewel was waiting for him when he returned to the table, soft and pretty and inviting.
“I don’t want to go,” he said. “Problems aside, there’s no one else I’d rather be with than you.”
She met his gaze. “I’d rather you stayed, too. But I’m not sure it’s wise.”
He mustered the last of his willpower and reached for his jacket. “See you tomorrow?”
“Count on it.”
She moved closer to him, her lips parted and her head tilted at an appealing angle.
He caught another whiff of that vanilla-and-cinnamon scent she wore. “Tell me you’re willing to try and make this work with us.”
“I’m more than willing, Tanner. I’m determined.”
She initiated the kiss this time, placing her hands on his bristled cheeks and drawing him down to meet her full mouth. The world receded, and he didn’t dare move for fear of breaking the spell she cast.
“Goodnight, Tanner,” she breathed against his lips.
“What if we wait until it’s morning?” He wasn’t ready for this to end.
She laughed and pushed him toward the door. He went out and down the stairs, but he left his heart behind him.
Jewel had a job and was remaining here. She was also determined to make things work with them.
Tanner didn’t need any more incentive. He’d talk to Daniel, convince him to come clean and take back his life. It was past time.
* * *
JEWEL STOOD NEAR the kitchen unit, watching the gathering of people in her minuscule quarters. Lack of space aside, she was reminded of previous Christmases with the Bridwells and the Saunderses. Or, more accurately, what she’d imagined family Christmas mornings would be like once she and Tanner were married and had a baby.
She’d had to collapse the travel crib and stow it in the back of her truck in order to make enough room—along with some of the boxes and bins she’d been using for storage. Tanner had carried everything down earlier. He’d arrived ahead of time to help her with last-minute preparations and to give them a few romantic moments alone during their first Christmas with Ava.
They’d spent more of those moments locked in romantic embraces than readying her quarters, finishing mere seconds before Jewel’s parents arrived, bearing gifts and wearing what Jewel was sure were amused smiles. Tanner’s parents showed up not long after them.
Currently, Ava occupied her baby seat in the middle of the floor and was the center of both grandmothers’ attention. Jewel’s mom and Shirley Bridwell, chummy before the events of a year ago, were bonding even more over their shared granddaughter. They’d taken turns opening all of Ava’s many presents from parents and grandparents, showing each one to her and describing it as if Ava could understand.
A sizable stack of goodies now sat on the bed. Jewel had no idea where she was going to put everything. Tanner had done well in choosing his gifts for Ava. The purple-and-pink pajamas were adorable. Jewel would think of him and this lovely holiday morning every time Ava wore them.
Unfortunately, Tanner’s dad and Jewel’s dad were less chummy than the grandmothers. They’d greeted each other politely enough and chatted amiably for a few minutes before retreating to their respective corners.
Tanner had tried without success to engage his dad in conversations about sports and the stock market. But even he, with all his ch
arm and good cheer, couldn’t force his stubborn dad to participate. As a result, Tanner and his dad occupied the chairs at the table and Jewel’s dad sat in the recliner, periodically bending forward to pat Ava’s head or return a toy she’d dropped.
That left Jewel with nowhere to sit. She didn’t mind. Standing beside the kitchen unit gave her the ideal spot to observe the goings-on and refill empty coffee mugs.
Despite Huck Bridwell’s mulishness, the morning was progressing well. Expecting everyone to act like the past year hadn’t happened wasn’t realistic, though the grandmothers were doing a fairly decent job.
What mattered most was her and Tanner and how well they were doing. After last night, Jewel couldn’t be happier.
They’d attended Molly and Owen’s Christmas Eve wedding, which had been a dream from start to finish. Tanner had kept Ava busy while Jewel photographed the before, during and after shots. They’d taken Ava to the reception for a short while. Dressed like a little doll in a pink dress and with bows in her hair, she’d received almost as much attention as the bride. Jewel and Tanner had also received their share of doting looks from Emily.
When all was done, they’d bundled Ava up and gone for a drive around town to view the lights. Ava had fallen asleep almost immediately, leaving her parents free to make future plans and steal the occasional kiss. They’d stopped by Homer’s church for the holiday service but left partway through when Ava awoke and started crying. At home, they’d put Ava to bed and shared a hot chocolate.
Considering how late Tanner had stayed, they should have both been exhausted today. Instead, they were filled with energy and excitement.
All at once, Ava burst into a loud wail reminiscent of last night at church, disrupting Jewel’s ruminations. She knew that cry—her daughter was hungry. Making her way past the table, her gaze connected briefly with Tanner’s, and she saw the question in his eyes: is everything okay? She nodded.
“What’s the matter, darling?” Shirley cooed and tried to distract Ava with one of her new toys.
The baby would have none of it, and screwed her little face into a beet-red mask of fury and frustration.
“Does she need her diaper changed?” Jewel’s mom asked.
“She’s hungry.” Jewel reached down and lifted Ava from the seat.
There wasn’t anywhere in the small quarters to nurse discreetly, other than the bathroom. That didn’t appeal to Jewel. Grabbing a shawl off the chair, she returned to the kitchen unit. There, she draped the shawl over her and Ava, turned her back to the room and began to nurse.
Behind her, she heard Tanner telling everyone about his bull ride the other night. She had to smile. He was doing his best to divert attention from her, and she appreciated it.
When Ava finished, Jewel rearranged her clothes. Without thinking, she began rocking Ava and humming softly. Tanner wandered over, having given up his chair to his mom.
“Hey,” she said softly.
“How’s it going?”
“One of us is tuckered out.”
“So I see.” He withdrew a small wrapped package from behind his back and held it out. “I meant to give this to you earlier.”
“Oh, Tanner. Thank you.” Using her one available hand, she opened the gift. Beneath the tissue paper lay a beautiful leather wallet. “I love it.”
“I wasn’t sure...”
She ran a fingertip over the intricate tooling. “Just what I needed.” Still using one hand, she opened the wallet. “There’s a dollar in it!”
“My grandmother always said if you give a wallet as a gift, you should put money in it for good luck. I figured we could use a little. More than a little.”
Jewel examined his face, seeing her feelings for him reflected back at her. “Thank you.” She inclined her head toward the tiny counter and the gift sitting there. “I have something for you, too.”
“Yeah?” Grinning, he picked up the gift, held it to his ear and shook. “Hmm, nothing rattling.”
“Quit it,” she admonished with a soft chuckle.
He reached into the gift bag and removed a small photo album. “What’s this?”
“You’ll have to look.”
He opened the album, taking so long staring at each picture she was afraid he didn’t like it.
“Your mom helped me a little,” she admitted.
“It’s great.”
She thought she might have detected a trace of emotion in his voice. The good kind. “Really?”
He nodded. “Yeah.”
Between the pictures of Tanner that Jewel had taken of him over the years, and those his mother provided, Jewel had put together a photo history of Tanner’s bull riding, from the time he was a kid and had his first go-round on a mechanical bull to the other day at the Cave Creek Rough Stock Rental Company.
“That last picture,” she inclined her head, “is the one I sent to Oklahoma Rodeo News and that they didn’t want. It’s what gave me the idea. I made extra copies of the album for your mom and—” she hesitated “—one for Ava. I thought one day she might like seeing how her dad started and how he got to where he was.”
Tanner nodded solemnly. “Thank you.”
“There’s room for more pictures, in case you return to bull riding.”
“I see that.”
A thought occurred to her, one she hadn’t considered before. “I’m not making another attempt at pressuring you, Tanner. I swear.”
“I know. I’m going to talk to Dad and Daniel. Tomorrow or the day after. I don’t want to ruin Christmas.”
“Okay.” She wasn’t entirely convinced but said nothing as Tanner’s mom had risen from the table and was bearing down on them.
“We should probably leave for the restaurant soon. Our reservation is at eleven thirty.”
They’d opted for an early meal in order for Tanner’s parents to have ample time to spend with Daniel and his wife and their other grandchildren. Jewel’s parents had mentioned driving by an adult retirement community in Rio Verde, just to have a quick peek before Saturday’s home touring marathon with the real estate agent.
“No problem.” Jewel shifted Ava. She’d dressed the baby in a cute holiday outfit with socks that resembled elf shoes, right down to the bells on the toes. She need only wrap Ava in a warm blanket. “Hopefully, she’ll stay asleep during the drive to the restaurant, then wake up in a good mood.”
There was no dashing downstairs to the car and zooming away when a baby and two families were involved. They took three separate vehicles since they would all be leaving in different directions after the meal. Jewel made sure to pack a jar of applesauce for Ava in the diaper bag, just in case finding a place to nurse in seclusion presented a problem.
She and Tanner went together in her truck as she had the car seat for Ava. Jewel’s crossed fingers worked—Ava didn’t wake while being carried downstairs or during the drive, giving Jewel and Tanner another chance to converse and hold hands across the console.
Like the old days. Back then, they’d touched whenever they were within a few feet of each other. They hadn’t been able to help themselves. They still couldn’t.
The three vehicles made a caravan for the twenty-minute ride. Ava woke up the second they pulled into a parking space and Jewel shut off the engine.
“Well, hello, sleepy pie.” Tanner gazed over his shoulder at Ava who blinked, owl-eyed. “Have a good nap?”
She gurgled and peered around as if realizing she’d woken up in a different place from her mother’s arms, where she’d fallen asleep.
The group gathered and walked together across the parking lot to the restaurant entrance, Jewel pushing Ava in the stroller.
“I’m always amazed at how many people eat out on Christmas Day,” Shirley commented.
Inside the well-appointed restaurant, they were greeted by a hostess. Daniel and his famil
y hadn’t yet arrived, and it was mutually decided they’d wait at their table in the dining area. When they were seated, a chair was removed between Jewel and Tanner’s mom to make room for the stroller, which Jewel adjusted so that Ava was sitting up rather than reclined. She waved her hands and smiled whenever someone spoke to her or played with her. Tanner, sitting on Jewel’s other side, gave her knee an affectionate squeeze.
Finally, Daniel and his family entered the dining room. The adults at the table stood to greet them. Daniel’s daughter, an adorable imp of four, skipped over to Ava’s side.
“Can I hold the baby?” she asked excitedly.
“Oh, I think you’re too young for that,” Shirley told her granddaughter.
“Maybe when we’ve finished eating,” Jewel said, “if you promise to sit quietly.”
The little girl jumped up and down. “I will, I will.”
Ava made a happy sound, seeming to take an instant liking to her older cousin.
A booster chair was brought for Daniel’s toddler son. He wasn’t the least bit interested in Ava, and when Jewel spoke to him, he clung shyly to his mother’s side.
She hadn’t seen Daniel since before his surgery, and made a conscious effort to hide her shock at his altered appearance. He’d grown thinner, a combination of muscle and weight loss, and looked ten years older than his actual age. Behind his right ear, the tail of a long scar extended from beneath his hairline. It made Jewel want to wince, as did his severe limp.
She found herself hugging him warmly despite her anger at what he’d done to her and Tanner. Here was someone who’d been through a grueling hardship and obviously continued to struggle.
“Merry Christmas,” she told Rosalyn, hugging her, too. “It’s great to see you again.”
“Same here.” She bent over to peer at Ava. “My, my. Aren’t you adorable? Congratulations, Jewel.”
Once everyone was seated, casual conversation ensued, menus were studied and beverages ordered. No one broached any subject more controversial than the weather and Jewel being hired permanently at Sweetheart Ranch. There would be no disagreement or tension today if it could be helped.
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