Ears and Tail Required

by Heidi Fisk

  "Oh..." Schwarz paused for a moment. She hummed to herself for a moment before crossing her arms. "What kind of food do you have around here,"

  I groaned, it was going to be a pain to list off every single thing that was available around the area. "We can either have pizza or Chinese food," I was more leaning towards Chinese food myself. It didn't matter in the long run since whatever we didn't eat that night would be what we ate the next night.

  "I think I'll go with the pizza," Schwarz smiled as I groaned. Of course, she had to pick the exact opposite of what I wanted to eat. I took out my cell-phone scanning the screen. I recorded the local pizza places number. Being out of food happened quite often, and it was always good to have them on speed dial without having to look them up online.

  "What do you want on it..."

  "Tuna..."

  I merely glared at her before she rolled her eyes. "Oh fine, I guess I'll take anchovies is fine..." "So half anchovies and the other half will probably be pineapple pepperoni," I liked pineapple. I had no idea why it why. I think the sweetness just complemented the taste of a pizza.

  "Half and half? No, I want my own pizza," Schwarz stated as I shrugged. Two medium pizzas wouldn't cost that much more than a single large.

  I dialed the number as I waited for a moment, someone on the other end picked up as I cleared my throat. "Ah yes, I would like to order two medium pizzas. One with anchovies and the other with pineapple and pepperoni. I would also like it delivered to Dunes Pier 21 Beach Apartments zip code is 17792, on the second floor, apartment number 13..."

  It was a basic outline if information before I gave my cellphone information. The other person confirmed the order before saying it would be there in thirty minutes.

  "Okay...thanks," I hung up as Schwarz looked at me, her tail wagging.

  "How long is it going to be?"

  "About thirty minutes," Schwarz let out a somewhat annoyed groan as her body slowly started to slide down the couch. I guess this was the result of us skipping lunch. "Ugh, I going to die of hunger before then..." Schwarz jumped off the couch. She had a certain elegance to her movement. She placed her hands on the back of the sofa before stretching slightly. In one quick motion, she was standing next to the window sill looking out the window.

  "You know, staring outside won't make it come any faster," "I know, I'm not stupid...I just like seeing the lights in the town..." Schwarz leaned her head against the glass as if she was wondering about something."Hey...Joseph, do you have any family around here?"

  Her calling me by my name was still odd, no the fact that an actual cat girl was calling me by my name was weird. If I hadn't read any books or watched too much television I still would have been shocked by the fact, and as for the question.

  "Not around here no, I kind of moved from where they live two years ago to start fresh. I still keep in contact with them, but I don't see them too much."

  "I guess that makes sense," as randomly as she brought up the topic Schwarz dropped it as she continued to stare out into the streets below.

  "So, um, where are you from anyway?" I just wanted to ask her right quick since she doubted I would have another quiet moment to do so.

  "You know, around, just going from place to place and stuff..."

  It was a vague answer, but I expected as much from a cat, "I guess you're homeward bound huh!"

  "What?" "Homeward Bound...it's a movie about animals trying to find their way home," thinking about it maybe referencing a move from the 90s probably wasn't the best way to break the ice.

  Schwarz looked at me for a moment, "I want to watch that movie...can we watch it?" she almost sounded excited. I suppose the premise would appeal to someone like her as I looked at the time. It was a bit past nine and watching a movie with her while eating might not have been so bad.

  "Let me find it right quick," I knew I owned it on DVD, don't know why. It was probably a pretty childish thing to have. I pulled out one of my old gaming systems as I plugged it into the television. I hadn't been playing a lot of games just due to the lack of energy during the day. I dug into a box filled with old movies that my mom gave me, and I pulled out the movie in question.

  I slowly put it into the console as I jumped on the couch. It was a movie that I had seen a lot. I don't know why I still had it. As the film slowly started Schwarz was utterly captivated by what was on the screen as I smiled.

  I always did enjoy showing someone the movie for the first time. It was difficult for me to describe why I enjoyed it so much. Time flew by as I heard a knock on the door, I got up before picking up my wallet. I answered to door as I instantly flinched. I couldn't let anyone see Schwarz...too bad by the time I realized that fact the door was already opened.

  I held my breath. I doubted he could see inside of the room well from his position. Plus Schwarz was rather petite. I doubted that she visible at the moment. I sighed as I glanced at the two pizzas before giving the man his money.

  "Cash? Well, that makes my job easier," the man smiled as he handed me the food. I was pretty sure that I was supposed to sign something, but I wasn't complaining.

  The man quietly left without saying much else. He wasn't a particularly friendly fellow as my nose started to itch. Schwarz pizza smelled terrible, though that was to be expected. I was just happy that I didn't get half and half.

  "The food's here!" Schwarz nearly jumped out of her seat as she nearly ran towards me. She pressed her nose to the top box before taking a deep whiff. "Yep, this one is mine!"

  "You can tell through the box?" "Of course I can, though I can't get the full effect of something unless it's in my mouth," she said that with a wink as she sat on my couch opening the box up. Steam came puffing up into the room as I sat next to her holding mine.

  I was usually a stickler about eating on the couch, but since a movie was playing and it would have ruined the mood if we ate on the table.

  The bottom of the box was kind of hot on my lap as I decided to wait a few minutes, though Schwarz didn't wait as she casually picked up a slice and placed it in her mouth before taking a chomp out of it. She squirmed slightly as she pressed her fingers against her cheeks while she chewed.

  Maybe the food wasn't that hot. I tried to pick it up as I felt a stinging sensation on the tips of my fingers. No, it was too hot to even pick up let alone eat.

  "How can you eat this?" Schwarz's ear twitched before she licked her lips. "Oh this isn't going to burn my mouth or anything, I can handle hot food unlike you..."

  I frowned, I know she was just messing with me as she started on her second slice. I shrugged before slowly working on my first piece blowing on it as I went.

  Schwarz was a fast eater, I expected her to barely finish the food, but she ate it rather quickly. She even ate the crust as she casually tossed the box to the floor before her attention was focused entirely on the movie again.

  I looked down at my box only to notice that I was just halfway through, not only that I was getting thirsty as I turned to her. "Um, do you want something to drink?"

  "Do you have anything like fruit juice?"

  I didn't expect that kind of answer as I got up from my seat. "I thought you would want something like milk." Schwarz stuck out her tongue ever so slightly, "blegh, I don't mind milk with my cereal or oatmeal, but just straight chugging it makes me feel sick."

  Maybe it is a myth that cats were particularly fond of milk that or I wasn't accounting for personal taste. I opened the fridge to see cans of fruit punch and a few sodas left. Despite not having a lot of actual food in the refrigerator there was plenty to drink.

  "Here you go..." without thinking too hard, I tossed the can right towards her. I thought I made a mistake when I noticed she wasn't moving her arms, but something else caught it. Her long black tail was wrapped around the can as she placed it in her hand before chuckling.

  "I bet you thought that it was going to smack me in the face or something huh? I can tell just by looking at you!"

  I grum
bled slightly before picking up a random soda and walking back to the couch. After that, I finished the pizza as well as the movie as Schwarz stretched again slightly. "That was a fun movie, silly but enjoyable..."

  "Eh... I guess you'd have to watch it at the time," I said that, but I wasn't even born when the movie came out.

  "Welp, I'm going to sleep...get off the couch!" Schwarz yawned as I frowned. It was barely eleven, and she wanted to go to bed. "What are you, ten? I say don't go to sleep until it's past midnight," at least that is what I said during the weekends. I only had so much time before I had to drag myself back to work and I wanted to enjoy it.

  "Well, I'm sleepy...I mean I could take the bed if you want," she smiled as I scoffed.

  It was a pain, "fine I should go to bed myself. Rather wake up early anyway," I let her have the victory, it didn't mean too much in the long run. I picked up the two empty boxes before throwing them away.

  I glanced back at Schwarz who was curled up in a ball sleeping on the couch. I sighed as I turned off the light in the kitchen. Leaving the cat-girl to her business.

  "I guess I'll find out if this was a dream or not when I wake up tomorrow."

  2

  She's still here

  My eyes twitched as I slowly forced them open. With a massive grunt, I lifted myself out of my bed and rubbed my eyes. I started my usual morning ritual of brushing my teeth and taking a shower. I slowly exited into the main room to see a small black cat lying on the couch.

  It gave a small yawn as it laid spread across the couch. It was sitting on the large T-shirt that I gave Schwarz. It was lying on its back rolling around slightly. I turned my head and rolled my eyes before turning my attention to the remote and television.

  "I knew it was probably just a dream..." I was almost relieved as I clicked on the television.

  "Why, did you have a dream about me?" My eye twitched as I instinctively turned without thinking only to be greeted with Schwarz most private area right in my face. "So the carpets do match the drapes...no wait!" I quickly shook my head. There was Schwarz naked again just lying on the couch. Her feet were digging into me as I quickly turned my head.

  "Damn it. You could have kept the shirt on!"

  "Why? It was getting hot, and I wanted to cool off, what are you some kind of virgin or something?" My eye twitched before grumbling, "I've had a girlfriend, so no I am not a virgin," thinking about it the fact that I answered at all probably showed how childish I was being.

  "Oh~" she held that word as she sat up, "well I assume she's your ex, tell me about her!"

  I frowned, "it's pretty rude to ask that out of the blue...I don't want to talk about it."

  Schwarz looked at me for a moment before nodding, "okay I get it, we all got our secrets I won't bring it up anymore."

  I was surprised by her reaction, though there were more pressing matters. "W-wait, but the shirt back on!" "No...it's too big for me, and I prefer being naked anyway, maybe if you have something cute I could wear I will but I doubt it," at this point, she was just flat out refusing to put clothes on as I grumbled.

  "If you are going to be naked at least sit on the floor!" "No way, the fact that I am naked means I should sit on the couch," Schwarz frowned as I grumbled again. Her body was just rubbing all against my couch, even if someone took a bath it still probably wasn't the most proper thing to do.

  It seemed that Schwarz noticed this as she started to rub her body against my couch almost intentionally. "Ah...your couch sure is cold, I just want to plaster my body all over it..."

  Her body twitched almost like a cat as I bit my lip. "No, stop...I'll buy you something 'cute.'" I gagged for a moment, still better than having her just walk around naked touching all over my stuff.

  She cheered for a moment before quickly putting the shirt I gave her back on. She stretched for a moment before walking towards the bathroom. She was most likely going to brush her teeth as I sighed.

  What were we going to do today? I could bring out my laptop and let her do some stuff for awhile, just to keep her out of my hair. Still, it was early in the morning, and I had no idea how I would be able to keep her entertained especially when I was going to work the next day.

  After a few minutes, Schwarz exited the bathroom nearly kicking down the door. "Hey, so what are we going to eat today?"

  "Man, you're worried about food already? I thought you were supposed to be a cat, not a pig," "Boo, being mean to me like that, whatever," she then walked towards my fridge and opened it without even asking. She was getting a bit too comfortable for my liking, but at the same time, the only thing she was going to find in there was some more tuna. "Well, at least you have good taste in fish!" she smiled as she took out a can of tuna for herself.

  "Is it really alright for you to be eating that much tuna, I heard too much of it isn't good for cats," at least that is what I heard from television and some research I did on animals.

  "Wait...tuna is bad for cats?!" Schwarz voiced raised as her eyes widened. She really should have known about it considering she was a cat. Though I doubt the same rules applied to her. "Well, I think it can cause malnutrition and liver problems if they eat it exclusively, I mean it's not bad by itself, but their diets should be more varied,"

  Schwarz slumped her shoulders before giving me a slightly pitiful look, "wow you are the type of guy that would know useless animal facts huh?"

  "Whatever, eat whatever you want, just don't whine when you're pissing blood or whatever," I grumbled before turning my attention back to the television.

  Schwarz shrugged as she opened the can and let the tuna fall into her mouth. She didn't even use the mayonnaise or relish packs that came with it. Honestly, at times, I had a hard time believing she was a girl.

  She was far too crude, too noisy, too blunt. She almost felt like a cat trapped in a woman's body, I didn't know if that made her more annoying or attractive at this point.

  "Man couldn't you at least be one of those quiet girls, the ones that are shy and blush a lot?" those girls were precisely my type as Schwarz grumbled slightly. "Sorry~ maybe my lips should quiver more," she walked back on the couch and sat back down. It seemed that a single can of tuna was enough for her as she watched the screen kicking her feet.

  "I'm bored, don't you have anything else to do outside of watching television?" I paused for a moment before speaking, "well we could go out, but you really don't have any clothes you could wear...I guess we could go on the internet and watch some videos if you want, maybe play a few games?"

  "I guess that sounds fun," Schwarz started to kick her feet as I got up and entered my room again. There was a small laptop in the corner as I unplugged it and started it up. I walked back out and sat next to her. Thinking about it, now would probably be a good time to set this up.

  "Hey do you want your own account?" it was just something I said on a whim as Schwarz tilted her head.

  "Sure why not, since I am going to be staying awhile anyway," Schwarz leaned against me as she stared at the screen. It was making things a lot easier for myself. It would have been annoying to have to type in the password every time she wanted to get on as I glanced over at her. "So what do you want your password to be anyway?"

  "Don't need one," She was blunt about it, I simply shrugged. It wasn't like anyone was going to break into my apartment to steal vital information about the random cat-girl that may or may not have been apart of my imagination.

  "There you go, you've got your account and a basic internet browser. You can even download smaller stuff, but larger ones you are going to need my password and permission to do,"

  "I'm not stupid I used a computer before, now give me that..." she snatched the laptop out of my hand as she turned away from me typing carelessly on it.

  "Man you're pushy," I spoke under my breath. It was better than her trying to get me to do stuff with her at the very least. I paused for a moment before my stomach started to rumble. For the first time since I got up, I looked at the time.
It was slightly past eleven. I cursed myself. I even went to bed early yet it didn't matter.

  "I'm probably going to head out in about thirty minutes to get something to eat. Do you want anything?"

  "You're going out, I'll probably go with you then," she said that like it wasn't a big deal.

  "What? You don't even have any clothes to wear," I said that as she rolled her eyes.

  "You idiot, I'm just going to surprise you when you're about to leave..." she smirked before returning to her business on my laptop. I know she didn't care if she went around half-naked, but there was a certain level of normalcy that people expected. I couldn't just walk around with her dressed in only a T-shirt, if someone from work were to see then rumors probably would start spreading.

  "If you do have something to wear or a plan, I don't mind taking you with me," I said, it would be interesting to see how she acts in front of other people.

  I got dressed as the time slowly started to go down. We would most likely be getting subs instead of Chinese food, not because subs were healthier, but I had a feeling that Schwarz didn't care much for it.

  I put on a long-sleeved shirt glanced over towards Schwarz who was still on the laptop. She hadn't made a single motion since she said that. I was wondering if she was planning on going out like that.

  "Hey, we're ready to leave..." I just stated that as Schwarz brushed her hair to the side as she yawned slightly. She dug her hands and feet into the couch as she put her bum into the air ready to pounce at me, I doubted she was going to do it...

  "Um, Schwa-" without warning she jumped at me as I flinched however in a single motion her figure grew smaller as she flew towards me. The shirt she was wearing fell on the floor as I felt tiny claws digging into my shirt.

  Schwarz purred as she climbed onto my shoulder as I sighed, "well I guess that's one way to do it..." I sighed as I walked out the front door and onto the steps of the building.

  It was a dreary day like it had just got done raining. Puddles were everywhere, and I made a note not to slip on the steps. The parking lot of the apartment complex was small, but it did its job. The landlord was somewhat relaxed about anything that wasn't noise.