Perfect Rhythm

by Jae

  “I love you,” Leo said, emphasizing every word as if they were part of a magic spell.

  Giddiness swept through Holly, so strong it left her weak. She threw herself at Leo, toppling them both to the floor, where they lay laughing and kissing and whispering it again and again.

  Leo’s heart beat fast beneath hers, and her hands ran from Holly’s shoulders to her hips and back as if she needed to touch her to convince herself that this was real.

  “I know it’s pretty fast,” Leo said when they came up for air. “But with my dad and being back home, everything feels sped up, more compressed and intense somehow. Like dog years compared to human years, you know?”

  “Yeah, it feels that way for me too.” Holly laughed at the comparison and swiped a strand of hair behind Leo’s ear. It was as if hearing Leo’s song had pulled the stopper that had bottled her emotions, and now she couldn’t stop beaming at her. Was it possible to feel drunk on love? A lot still had to be resolved, but for now, she wanted to enjoy this feeling.

  Just as she was about to bend down and kiss Leo again, the front door creaked open and Sharon’s voice drifted up the stairs, “Leo? Holly?”

  Holly let her forehead sink against Leo’s.

  “Next time, we go to your place,” Leo grumbled.

  “We can’t leave your mom alone in the house yet.” But truth be told, she couldn’t wait to spend more time with Leo either, just the two of them.

  Reluctantly, Holly got to her feet and held out her hand to pull Leo up too. “Come on. Let’s go warm up the pizza.”

  As they walked to the door, Holly remembered something. “You never told me what you’re going to call the song.”

  “I was thinking maybe ‘Up on the Roof.’ Like the line in the chorus.”

  “I like it. But isn’t there a song with that title already?”

  Leo rubbed her chin. “Damn. You’re right. How about ‘Holly’s Song’?”

  “Uh…wow…I…” Having Leo name the song for her was so special, she didn’t know what to say.

  Leo studied her. “Unless you don’t want to make our relationship quite so public yet.”

  Holly smiled. “I want to shout it from the rooftops.” She pulled Leo to a stop at the top of the stairs and kissed her. “Speaking of rooftops and the chorus… If you let your mother hear that song, she’ll know it wasn’t a squirrel up on the roof.”

  Leo laughed. “I think she already suspects the squirrels were a little larger than normal…quite a bit larger.”

  With one hand on her hip, Holly gave her a playful glare. “Are you calling me fat?”

  Leo trailed her hand over Holly’s other hip in a gentle caress. “Nope. I like my squirrels just like this.”

  “Squirrels, plural?”

  “Squirrel, singular,” Leo said, all playfulness gone.

  “Hey, you two.” Her mother stood at the bottom of the stairs. “What’s with all that talk about squirrels?”

  They looked at each other and laughed before descending the stairs.

  “Nothing, Mom. Nothing squirrelly going on at all.”

  Chapter 21

  Leo had known she liked women, not men, since she had been thirteen. In the nearly twenty years since then, she had, for some reason, never bought flowers for any of the women she had dated. Jewelry, perfume, bottles of wine, sure. Once, she had even gone overboard and bought a car for one of her girlfriends.

  She would give Holly the world if she allowed it, but she had a feeling that if she tried to woo her with expensive gifts, Holly would probably tell her she was crazy.

  But she still deserved something to let her know how much Leo loved her and how much her constant support throughout the past three weeks had meant to her. Instead of returning to work full-time, Holly had requested part-time work for a while. So now she had taken over some of the patients of a colleague who was on maternity leave and checked on Ms. Voerster and other elderly residents of Fair Oaks several times a day. That left her free to spend her afternoons and evenings with Leo.

  And nights.

  Whenever Holly stayed over, which was three or four times a week, they cuddled all night, and the kisses they shared were breathtaking. Holly seemed to enjoy it very much, but it never went any further, and Leo was fine with that.

  What kind of flower would say “I love you,” “I accept you,” and “I’m so grateful, I could fall to my knees and build a shrine to you” all at the same time?

  For the second time this month, Leo stood in front of Ashley’s flower shop. The bell above the door jingled, and the scent of soil and fresh flowers surrounded her as she entered, reminding her of the last time she’d been there. It had been less than three weeks ago, but so much had happened since.

  “I’ll be right with you,” Ashley called from the back room.

  Leo turned toward the card rack next to the cash register. Some of the cards said “thank you,” others “I love you,” but none of them were good enough to express exactly what Leo was feeling.

  Ashley stepped out of the back room. A warm smile crossed her face when she saw Leo. “Oh hi, Leo. How are you doing?”

  “I’m fine,” Leo said and, to her surprise, found that it was true. The wounds of the past were still there, but they were starting to heal. “How are you?”

  “Pretty good. The shop’s keeping me busy.”

  “I can imagine. Thanks again for arranging the flowers for Dad’s funeral. Everyone said they were beautiful, and Mom loved the lilies you put into the casket spray.”

  Ash glanced down, coloring a little beneath the praise. “I’m glad to hear that. So, what can I do for you?”

  “I need a bouquet.”

  “Something for your mother? Maybe some white daisies and some purple and pink carnations to cheer her up?”

  “Uh, actually…” Damn. Getting flowers for Holly from Holly’s ex had been a dumb idea. But now she was here, and she refused to hide their relationship the way Ash had done. “You know what? I need two bouquets. Getting flowers for my mom is also a good idea. Let’s go with the daisies and the carnations.”

  Ashley pulled flowers from several buckets around the shop, trimmed the stems, and artfully arranged them. She kept glancing up at Leo as she worked.

  Leo gave her a questioning gaze. “What is it?”

  “Um, nothing. I just… You look good.”

  What the hell…? Was it just a sincere compliment between friends, or was it something more? Leo ran one hand through her hair. “Uh, thanks.”

  In the silence that followed, Ash held the bouquet out to Leo for her approval, which Leo gave with a nod.

  Tissue paper rustled as Ash tore it from a roll and wrapped it around the flowers. She extended the bouquet toward Leo but then kept hold of it so they both ended up clasping the flowers from either side. “You know,” she said so quietly that Leo had to strain to hear her, “back then…on prom night…when you kissed me…I was afraid.”

  Leo nearly dropped the bouquet. She hadn’t expected Ash to ever bring it up. “Of me?”

  “No. Not of you. Never of you. Just…of my own feelings and what they might mean.”

  A roaring sound started in Leo’s ears. She swayed a little. “So you…” She smacked her dry lips. “You had feelings for me? Back then?”

  Staring down at the flowers, Ash nodded.

  This was what Ash should have told her fourteen years ago, when Leo had searched her out the day after the prom to let her know she was leaving and to talk about the kiss. Why did no one ever talk to her—really, openly talk?

  “Then why didn’t you tell me?” Leo asked. “You let me believe that I was the only one who felt anything.”

  “I never meant to hurt you. I just wasn’t ready to deal with it.”

  “And now you are?” Judging by how Ash had treated Holly during dinner wi
th the gang, she found that hard to believe.

  Ash peered up at her. Was there a hint of hope, of expectation in her eyes? “Yes. I think I am. So, I was wondering… Maybe you’d like to…I don’t know…have coffee with me sometime?”

  Leo clutched the flower stems. Wow. Just…wow. That question would have meant the world to her fourteen years ago, but now it left her with a bitter taste in her mouth.

  When the silence stretched between them, Ash looked away. “Oh. I see. There’s someone in New York.”

  “No. Not in New York.” God, Ashley seemed to be the only person left in Fair Oaks who hadn’t yet heard that she and Holly were dating. Or maybe she had thought it was just a rumor. “But I do have a special someone.”

  Ash paled. “It’s not…not Holly, right?”

  Something in her tone—as if Leo couldn’t possibly date someone like Holly—made her bristle. She stood up straighter and looked Ashley square in the eyes. “Yes, it is.”

  “Oh, Leo.” Ash let out a long sigh and put a hand on Leo’s. “You have no idea what you’re in for.”

  Leo pulled her hand away. “In for?”

  “Didn’t she tell you about her…um, issues?”

  For a second, Leo could only stare, open-mouthed. Then anger bubbled up so fierce and hot that she thought steam would come out of her ears. She struggled not to beat Ash with the bouquet. “Issues?”

  “Oh. So she didn’t mention that she’s…um…?”

  “If you mean that she’s asexual, yes, she did. But the only one with issues here is you!”

  “Leo, please. Don’t be like that. I just want you to be happy.”

  “Who said I’m not happy with Holly?”

  Ash opened her mouth to answer, but Leo interrupted her with a forceful shake of her head. “You know what? Save it. Just because you didn’t appreciate what you had with Holly doesn’t mean I’ll make the same mistake.”

  “You don’t understand.”

  “No, you’re the one who doesn’t understand.” Leo fought not to raise her voice. “And how could you? You can barely accept your own sexual orientation, so how are you supposed to accept Holly’s?”

  A tear ran down Ashley’s face. “That’s not fair.”

  Leo gritted her teeth and restrained herself from further discussion. “What do I owe you for the flowers?” She jerked her head toward them.

  Ashley stammered out an amount.

  Leo slammed two bills onto the counter and stormed out without saying goodbye or waiting for her change. Only when she was halfway to her car did she realize that she hadn’t gotten flowers for Holly. Well, she would have to find another way to show Holly how much she loved and appreciated her, because she wasn’t setting foot in Ash’s shop again anytime soon.

  She jerked the driver’s side door open and set the bouquet onto the passenger seat. “Issues, my ass!”

  When Leo glanced at her wristwatch, sweat started to bead on her forehead, even though she wasn’t the one lugging a large mattress up a set of stairs. “Come on, guys. She’ll be here any second. I’ll give you a hundred bucks each if you make it out of here within the next five minutes.”

  The two delivery men exchanged a glance and doubled their efforts.

  Within four minutes, the new mattress was in place.

  Leo signed for it on the clipboard one of them held out to her before she paid them and herded them back downstairs and out the door.

  Just as they climbed into their van, Holly’s red Jeep came down the street. She waited until the van had backed out before she pulled into the driveway.

  Damn. Somehow, nothing was going right this week. First her aborted attempt to buy Holly flowers and now this.

  When Holly climbed out of the Jeep, Leo forgot about the possibly ruined surprise for a moment. Unlike when she had worked for Leo’s father, Holly was now wearing scrubs.

  Leo had never thought of scrubs as hot, but with Holly wearing them, they were damn sexy. Or was it asexy in Holly’s case? The thought made her smile.

  She crossed the driveway to greet Holly with a warm hug and a kiss, and they walked back to the house hand in hand.

  “What was that?” Holly pointed over her shoulder with her thumb. Her lips curled into a smile. “You’re not cheating on me with a couple of burly guys, are you?”

  “Damn, you caught me. I thought with you working and Mom on a grocery run to St. Joe, it would be a good time for a threesome.”

  Holly’s smile faded away. She closed the front door behind them and turned toward Leo with a serious expression. “Is that something you’d ever do?”

  “A threesome with two guys?” Leo shook her head. “Nope. I’m not interested in men, even if my manager sometimes tries to sell me as bi.”

  “I wasn’t talking about threesomes, just…I don’t know…maybe having an open relationship.”

  Leo gaped at her. Where the hell was that coming from? “Is that really what you want?”

  Holly stared at the top of her sneakers. “No. But I know other mixed-orientation couples handle it that way.”

  “Mixed-orientation couples?”

  “Yeah. You know…where one partner is asexual and the other isn’t.”

  “Well, there’s one problem with that approach: the thought of sleeping with someone else has about this much appeal to me.” Leo pressed her thumb and index finger together to indicate zero. “I’ve never tried an open relationship, and I certainly don’t want to start now.”

  A long breath escaped Holly, and a shadow lifted off her face.

  “Holly…” Leo tugged on her hand to get her to look at her. “What’s going on? Why offer something that would hurt you?”

  Holly’s gaze flicked up to meet hers. “Because I want you to be happy.”

  “You make me happy,” Leo said firmly. “I don’t want or need anyone else.”

  Moisture gathered in Holly’s eyes.

  Leo pulled her into her arms. “Next time doubts like that start to creep up, just tell me. I don’t want you to think for a second that you’re not enough for me.” She held Holly at arm’s length so she could look into her eyes. “Okay?”

  Holly nodded and nibbled her bottom lip as if she needed to process that thought.

  Tenderly, Leo guided her even closer and kissed her. “So, want to find out what the burly guys were really doing here?” When Holly nodded, she led her upstairs.

  “Don’t tell me you put a piano upstairs,” Holly said.

  Leo chuckled. “No. Better than a piano. More comfy, at least.” Slowly, she opened the door to her old room to reveal the new queen-size bed that had taken the place of her single bed. She had planned to put nice sheets on it, but the mattress had been delivered later than expected, so now it lay on the bed frame, completely bare.

  Holly stood in the doorway and stared at the bed. “Wow.”

  Was that a good wow or a bad wow? Leo searched her face. “It’s in no way meant to pressure you into anything. I just thought this would be more comfortable.”

  “I bet it will be. I love being close to you, but your old bed wasn’t meant for two people. I can’t wait to try out the new one. Thank you.” She tugged Leo close by their entwined fingers, cupped her face with her free hand, and brought their lips together for a leisurely exploration.

  The kiss started out tender rather than steamy, but then Holly surprised her with a playful lick and a nibble on her bottom lip.

  Jesus! Every bone in Leo’s body seemed to liquefy. She wrapped both arms around Holly to keep herself upright.

  Holly’s hands came to rest on her hips, her fingers splayed tantalizingly close to the upper curve of her butt.

  That warm contact and the slide of Holly’s tongue against her own made her body tingle from head to toe, and she couldn’t suppress a moan.

  It took conscious eff
ort to keep her hands on Holly’s back instead of letting them explore her tempting body. God, she ached to touch her, to let her fingers slide over the gentle curve of her hips or up to her full breasts.

  “I’m not going to break if you touch me,” Holly murmured against her lips as if reading her thoughts.

  But maybe I will. She couldn’t resist the invitation, though. Slowly, giving Holly every opportunity to stop her, she slipped one hand beneath her scrub top and stroked the satiny soft skin of her back.

  Holly hummed against her lips and mirrored the move, pulling the T-shirt from Leo’s shorts and letting her fingers caress every inch, from Leo’s hips to the clasp of her bra and back down. “So soft,” she whispered, then tilted her head and pressed a kiss to the side of Leo’s neck.

  Leo gasped and pressed Holly closer with both hands. Did Holly have any idea what she was doing to her? Something inside of her felt close to spiraling out of control. While she knew sex wasn’t on the table, her body obviously hadn’t gotten the message.

  “Uh, Holly. I…” She struggled to form words despite the haze of desire in her brain. “I think I need a shower.” A cold one.

  Holly’s hands lingered against her hips for another second, as if she was reluctant to let go. “Now?”

  Leo nodded. “Um, yeah. I’m a little sweaty. I mean, I…I was helping the delivery guys with the bed earlier, so I, um, worked up a sweat.” Her body protested as she forced herself to pull away and marched to the bathroom.

  Once inside, she softly closed the door, leaned against it, and exhaled. Je-sus! Was this what it would be like?

  So what if it is? You’re not a hormone-driven teenager who can’t control her urges.

  But they existed, as the none-too-subtle pressure between her legs told her in no uncertain terms. She loved Holly; she knew that, but was she ready to give up sex for good?

  It’s a little late for that question, isn’t it? She had already made that decision when she’d realized she was in love with Holly. But she had underestimated how hard it would be to ignore her desire in situations like this. Could she really go through with it, not just now but for the rest of her life?