by Tana Stone
That’s what I was afraid of. I might have been trained in protocol, but that didn’t mean I relished the thought of being stared at by hundreds of aliens. Aliens who were known throughout the galaxy for being ruthless. Even though Toraan was not the bloodthirsty raider I’d been expecting, how could I be sure the others weren’t? Still, I didn’t have a choice.
I snaked through the crowd toward the front, attracting surprised glances and causing a wave of whispers to trail behind me. When we reached the raised platform lined with high-backed chairs and a single, long table, I let out a sigh of relief.
Toraan stood next to one of the chairs, talking to another raider. I fought the urge to call out his name, but I was glad when he spotted me.
He waved me forward, and met me at the top of the short flight of steps, his gaze taking in my dress. “The dressmaker did a good job.”
I turned to introduce the woman, but she was gone. I turned back to the Raas, leaning into him. “I’m glad you’re here. I was starting to feel out of place.”
“You have nothing to fear,” he told me as he led me to a chair behind the table and pulled it out. “This is a celebration.”
I nodded, but I couldn’t help noticing that his jaw was tight. Toraan did not look like he was enjoying himself, either.
He took the seat next to me, but was immediately pulled into a conversation with the Vandar on his other side. I took the opportunity to look out over the crowd. Guests were still pouring in and filling the hall, bodies jostling each other for places at the tables. Light no longer streamed in from the high windows, but candles burned in sconces on the walls and down the tables, as servers filled goblets and deposited trays laden with food.
On the warbird, I’d gotten used to Vandar food—at least what the raiders ate—but I recognized little of what was on the trays placed in front of me. A rich, savory scent wafted up from some kind of grilled meat, and the aroma of bread was familiar.
The more people that filled the hall, the louder the buzz of voices and bursts of laughter. Raiders slammed goblets back down on the tables and pounded their fists, and even Toraan laughed next to me.
I took a gulp of wine and peered over him. He was seated next to his uncle, the old Raas who had greeted us at the ship and had seemed less than pleased to learn about me. I suspected he and Toraan had talked, and he now knew about the deal I’d made, but still, he eyed me with suspicion.
“You should eat.” Toraan motioned to my empty plate, before turning back to his conversation with his uncle.
I’d been expecting some sort of welcome or blessing of the food, but it seemed that was not part of Vandar tradition. As I’d learned on the warbird, the Vandar did not use utensils, so I gingerly pulled several morsels of grilled meat onto my plate using a wedge of flatbread.
“That is better when eaten with these.” Toraan’s majak, who was seated next to me and had been talking to the warrior on his other side until that moment, handed me a small basket of brown rolls.
I blinked at him for a few moments. I didn’t think the raider had ever said more than a few words to me before, and I’d always gotten the idea that he disapproved of my presence on the raiding ship. “Thank you.”
He grunted and gave a half shrug, gesturing with his head to the raucous crowd. “This must be overwhelming for you.”
“I think there are more people in this one room than in my entire town on Horl,” I admitted, taking the basket from him.
“A gathering this large is not an everyday occurrence for us either. But the return of a horde is always something to be celebrated, since it does not happen often.”
“Do you miss this when you’re in space?” I asked. “Your families and female Vandar, I mean.”
A smile teased his mouth. “You are aware that we do not deprive ourselves of female company while on raiding campaigns.”
My cheeks warmed. “Your families, then.”
“It is a sacrifice worth making.” He looked out over the crowd again. “But it is always good to come home, even for those of us who have families on other colonies.”
I bit into a roll as he turned back to the raider on his other side. I’d never imagined I would be visiting a planet so far from my own, much less a secret colony of the elusive Vandar. Then again, my life had taken an unexpected turn when Toraan’s ship had captured me.
I glanced over at the Raas and caught him looking at me, his expression somber. Before I could ask him if he was okay, his uncle stood and raised his glass.
“Tonight, we welcome back Raas Toraan and his crew of valiant raiders. They bring us tales of bloody battles, imperial ships destroyed, and planets liberated. We raise our glasses to their bravery and valor, and the honor they bring to Lokken and the gods of old.”
Cheers rose up throughout the hall as goblets were raised. “To Lokken!”
I drank along with everyone else, the strong wine buzzing my fingertips almost immediately.
Then Toraan stood, greeting his kinsman and raising his goblet to first his uncle and then to his crew. Again, we all drank as attendants hurried to refill glasses.
As I nibbled on a roll to keep from getting too drunk, I noticed a female at the front of the crowd. She was strikingly beautiful and held herself as if she was fully aware of it. She was also staring unabashedly at Toraan.
I wanted to ask him who she was and why she was looking at him like she wanted to eat him, but he was continuing to toast his command deck warriors. I took another drink, and told myself that she must be a member of his family, happy to have him home.
When I heard my name, my attention snapped to Toraan.
“It is appropriate that I introduce her for the first time to you, my fellow raiders, family, and friends.” He looked down at me, placing a hand on my shoulder. “I have taken her as my mate and my Raisa.”
The laughter and talking ceased as all eyes swiveled to me. I tried to smile, but my face burned, and my cheeks quivered. The Vandar were not cheering and drinking to me. They were shocked by his announcement, and not at all pleased.
I summoned every ounce of duty drilled into me by my mother, and I straightened my shoulders and looked out over the heads that were now facing me. I would not let myself look weak, even if I had to dig my fingernails into my own arm to keep from crying.
Before the silence could stretch out any longer, the old Raas rose from his seat. “To Raas Toraan and his Raisa.”
“To Raas Toraan and his Raisa,” the crowd echoed, then there were a few cheers, and finally, the hall erupted in thumping and hooting.
Toraan sat, reaching over and squeezing my hand briefly. I allowed my shoulders to slump, then I caught the regal Vandar female staring again. But this time, it was not the Raas who’d captured her attention. It was me. Or, more specifically, my neckline. Her gaze was locked onto the unmarked skin exposed by my one-shouldered gown. Then she looked up at me and smiled.
Chapter 33
Rachael
I swallowed hard, the sweetness of the wine churning in my stomach. Even though the female smiled, her eyes were cold as they met mine. I forced myself to look away, and when I gathered the courage to glance back, she’d gone.
Although it probably wasn’t a great idea, I took another gulp of wine, my hand trembling as I held the goblet. When I’d drained it, I felt a little better. At least, I felt numb.
You’re imagining things, I told myself. She wasn’t anything more than a curious Vandar who’d never seen a human before.
Unlike the raiders who flew around the galaxy interacting with all kinds of aliens, the Vandar who lived on the colony were isolated. Unless the raiders brought visitors regularly—which I knew they didn’t, from the startled reactions I’d been getting—none of the residents had ever laid eyes on anyone who didn’t look exactly like them.
“Kind of like me before I left Horl,” I whispered to myself. Although I’d seen imperial officers and soldiers because they occupied our planet, other aliens had not been a c
ommon sight.
“Have you had enough to eat?” Toraan asked me, lowering his head to my ear to be heard above the din.
I nodded, even though I’d barely done more than nibble on a piece of bread. “Did you notice the female in the front who was staring at you?”
Toraan patted my hand, although his face contorted for a moment. “We are the guests of honor. Everyone is looking at us.”
He was right. I must have imagined the female’s intensity. I eyed my empty goblet. No more wine for me.
My stomach no longer churned, but my head swam as I sat on the dais, watching the Vandar drink and eat. It didn’t help that the heat from the bodies and the burning candles had made the cavernous hall steamy. I fanned myself with one hand, glad my dress was sleeveless, but wishing the fabric didn’t cover my legs and pool around my feet.
A steady stream of warriors came onto the dais to talk to Toraan, and I saw that his plate was as untouched as mine. Shouts and bellowing laughter rose up, and scuffles broke out but dissolved into more laughter. Compared to the staid meals I’d been used to on Horl, this was more like dinner and a brawl.
I waited for an appropriate time to interrupt Toraan, but I finally turned to Rolan. “Where are the…?” I didn’t know the polite term for bathroom—if the Vandar even had one—but I suspected that asking him for the powdering chamber would only confuse him.
His brow wrinkled for a moment before a look of awareness crossed his face. He jerked his head back and to one side. “Behind the hall. Would you like me to escort you?”
I stood, bracing the tips of my fingers on the table for balance. “No, thank you. I’m sure I can manage.”
I almost groaned at myself. Ugh. I sounded so much like my mother when I parroted the polite phrases she’d drilled into me.
Toraan’s first officer inclined his head at me, standing briefly as I did and allowing me to pass him. Holding the fabric of my dress with one hand so I wouldn’t trip on it, I slowly descended the short staircase. Luckily, there was so much noise and chaos, my departure wasn’t noticed, and I weaved my way through the crush of people and out an arched doorway to one side of the dais.
As soon as I was out of the hall, the noise diminished, and the air was not so stifling. I put a hand to the stone wall, savoring the coolness as I closed my eyes. A wave of dizziness washed over me, and I sucked in a breath.
“Are you unwell, dear?”
I pressed my lips together, tasting bile in the back of my throat, but I didn’t open my eyes. “I’m fine, thank you.”
A hand circled my waist. “You should rest. It seems the Vandar wine was too much for you.”
I bristled at the suggestion that I was drunk, even though the floor felt like it was shifting under my feet. I was too unsteady to resist being led to a hard seat, and when I opened my eyes I was sitting on a bench.
“That is better,” I admitted, already regaining my equilibrium. I glanced at the person sitting beside me and reared back.
It was the female who’d been staring at Toraan and then at me. “You.”
She didn’t appear ruffled by me recoiling. “Oh? Has he told you about me?”
The Vandar female was even more striking up close than she was from a distance, her statuesque figure so perfect and her skin so creamy she appeared to have been carved from marble. Next to her, I felt like a child.
Finally, her words permeated my muddled brain. “Has who told me about you?”
Her lips curved into a pitying smile. “Toraan. If you know who I am, he must have told you about us.”
What was she talking about? “Are you family?”
She let out a peal of laughter that echoed off the tall stone walls of the corridor. “I’m Lila.”
Was that supposed to mean anything to me? I took in her imperious smile and folded my arms over my chest. This female was starting to get on my nerves. “I’m sorry, but I’ve never heard that name—from Toraan, or any of the other Vandar.”
She smiled again, but her jaw was tight. “I can see why he’d want to keep me a secret, although it doesn’t seem fair to you.”
I didn’t reply, but narrowed my gaze at her.
“I know about your deal.” She’d dropped her voice to a whisper. “I heard Toraan telling his uncle all about it.”
That gave me pause, but then why shouldn’t Toraan tell his uncle? We’d come here so he could warn them about the empire, and I was the reason the Vandar now knew that Admiral Kurmog was searching for their colonies.
“I felt so sorry for you when I heard him say that you weren’t really his mate,” she continued with a sympathetic smile. “And that he’s only using you to strike back at the Zagrath.”
My first impulse was to snap back at her that it wasn’t true, but hadn’t that been our deal? To form a mating bond to keep me safe and humiliate the empire? “Maybe at first, but not anymore.”
“No?” She arched her eyebrows. “Then where are your marks?”
My gaze dropped to my chest and the unmarked flesh peeking out from beneath the gold fabric. She was right. If Toraan and I were more to each other, wouldn’t I have marks?
A cold realization settled over me. Unless only my feelings had changed. It didn’t matter if I’d fallen hard for the Raas. If he didn’t feel the same way, I’d never get his mating marks. A fresh wave of nausea made me press my fingers to my mouth.
“Toraan is too honorable to go back on his deal, but the Vandar will never accept a mate who does not share marks.” Her whisper had become a hiss. “Is that what you want? You can never give him a family, and being with you will only weaken his standing as Raas. You will never be his Raisa. You will be his destruction.”
I jerked away from her and stood, swaying on my feet. “Who are you?”
“I was meant to be his mate.” Her smile had vanished, and her face was now twisted in anger. “I was his first love, and I still hold his heart.”
As much as I wanted to denounce her as a liar, there was truth in her words. My stomach roiled and heat prickled my skin as I staggered away from her.
“You will never be his one true love.”
Even though her final words were no more than a whisper, they reverberated off the walls and followed me as I hurried down the corridor, both hands pressed on the rough stone to keep myself from collapsing.
Chapter 34
Toraan
I sat back and swigged my wine, grateful for a break from the steady stream of Vandar who had monopolized my attention most of the evening. Glancing over to check on Rachael, I was startled to see an empty chair beside me.
Tvek. How long had she been gone?
Leaning over, I prodded my majak’s arm. “Rolan, did you see my mate leave?”
He flicked his gaze to the empty chair between us. “She has not returned? She excused herself to the washing chamber, but I would have thought she’d be back by now.”
I scanned the feasting hall, but did not see a flash of her gold dress. “Was she ill?”
He shook his head. “She did not look ill.” He looked at her plate with cold food on it, and one half-eaten chunk of bread perched on the edge. “But she also did not eat much.”
I lifted her goblet, swirling the few droplets at the bottom. “While finishing her wine.”
I cursed myself for not paying better attention to her. I’d been so distracted by the Vandar who had wanted to greet me and hear about our latest campaign, many friends and family I had not seen in an age.
“That’s no excuse,” I muttered to myself as I stood, my heavy chair scraping the floor as I pushed it back. I’d neglected my mate for too long. Now I needed to find her and make amends. My heartbeat quickened as I thought about all the ways I could apologize to her, most of them involving her spread out naked beneath me.
“Do you wish me to join you?” Rolan asked, standing as well.
I clapped a hand on his arm. “No. Stay and enjoy the banquet.” My gaze landed on Viken in the chair next to him with a
female in his lap. “Like our battle chief.”
Rolan rolled his eyes, but resumed his seat.
I strode off the dais and from the hall, walking purposefully toward the washing chambers. I hoped Rachael was not ill. Although she’d drunk Vandar wine before, it had been watered down to make our ship’s supplies last longer. The wine on Zendaren was not.
The quiet of the corridors was a welcome respite from the bustling banquet, and I was grateful they were virtually empty. I passed a handful of raiders, who snapped their heels dutifully even though their eyes looked bleary, but there was no sign of Rachael.
When I reached the door to the female washing chamber, I poked my head inside and called her name. No response. I stepped in and made quick work of searching the round room, looking in every empty compartment.
Stepping back outside, I rubbed a hand across my forehead. Where could she have gone? Had she gotten lost in the corridors leading back to the feasting hall?
“There you are.”
I turned at the voice even though it did not belong to Rachael. “Lila.”
She glided toward me, her smile no less sultry and artificial than it had been earlier. “You don’t sound pleased to see me, Toraan.”
“We have already talked. What else is there to say?”
She tilted her head to one side. “I thought some good food and wine might soften you up and help you see clearly.”
Although I had once believed her to be the most beautiful female in the universe, I now found her beauty cold and empty. “I see you clearly enough, Lila.”
Her smile faltered for a moment, but she advanced on me, backing me almost to the wall and pressing her hands to my bare chest. “You know I’m right. We were meant to be together.”
I put my hands on hers to push them away. “You have a mate, and so do I.”
“But neither of us have mating marks. Don’t you see what that means? We made a horrible mistake.”