In The Dark (The Guardianship Trilogy Book 1)

by Sarah K. Jensen

  She had known the pain Caoimhe had suffered while in this plane, but she hadn’t heeded their pleas for her to stay at home. No. The stubborn wench had followed him and met Síofra’s now-grown brother, Nuadha.

  They had married almost as soon as they’d set eyes on each other and proceeded immediately to the marriage bed, where she’d conceived a babe.

  Stupid young man who couldn’t keep his britches fastened was the cause of his sister’s screams of pain. Ian glanced at the young man in question and saw the pain and torment on his face, so he didn’t say anything.

  Not that he rightly could, seeing as he had bedded more than his share of women over the years, but then, he’d never impregnated any of them. Of course, he’d never married any of them either, so he guessed the kid had that on him, if nothing else. Nuadha had wedded his sister before he’d bedded her.

  “How much longer will it be?” Nuadha asked, pushing his hands through thick bronze hair. The child, who had become a man right before Ian’s eyes, was scared for his wife. His lifemate.

  Ian hadn’t been around when Caoimhe had birthed Síofra, so he wasn’t sure how long it would take, but everything in him knew that his sister would be fine and that her child would be as well.

  “I’m no’ sure.” His brogue always thickened when he felt stress. It was crucial to keep his home in Éire a secret from the fae. And slipping into dropped letters as most the Irish did, didn’t help. After all, he’d spent much of his time around the humans on this plain. “She will be fine. Of that I am sure.”

  “I need a distraction,” Nuadha said out loud, though Ian thought he was talking to himself. He looked up into Ian’s face, his green eyes, so like his sister’s, flared. “Tell me a story.”

  Ian laughed. He used to pull Nuadha onto his lap and tell him stories when he was a wee laddie. Who knew, maybe a story wasn’t such a bad idea. The lad had been through a lot in the last few years. Losing both parents and his two younger sisters. He could use some cheering up.

  “I shall tell ye of one who is to come. A wee little lass who will fight the Oíche Scáthanna with all the power of Heaven and the fae behind her. She will have powers no other shall possess. She will come from a strong line of Caomhnóirí na Oíche. Her mother will be a direct descendant of Síofra. Her father a descendant of you and Gael’s.

  “This lass will be able to read the ancient fae language written in the book of spells which will close the gates of Hell. She will find the means to cleanse the earth of the wrong yer father’s father caused with his evilness.”

  Nuadha stared at Ian, all his attention on the subject at hand for the moment. “A wee lass? In the future? No’ now?”

  Ian didn’t understand why it would be this way, only knew somehow that it would. He would help her parents train her, and he knew that he would have some other connection to the bairn, but that was all. He wasn’t sure why he’d been given this knowledge, but he had, and he knew he must pass it on. And that it must continue to be passed on until the lass was born.

  In answer to Nuadha’s questions, Ian shook his head. “Not now. But it will be a lass. She will have the help of her family and lifemate. She will be taught well in the ways of the Caomhnóirí na Oíche as well.”

  Gael’s scream, followed by the bellow of a little one, ended the tale. Ian entered the cottage after Nuadha and watched as the midwife wrapped his nephew in a scrap of linen and laid the infant at his mother’s breast. Gael smiled at her husband, whispering, “Meet yer son. What will ye call him?”

  Nuadha stood like a statue, staring at his wife and babe.

  “Nuadha?”

  He shook his head, a smile breaking across his hard-edged face. “Ye gave me a son, wench?”

  “Wench, is it?” Gael laughed. “Aye, I gave ye a son. Now name the lad or I shall call him Ian, after me brother here.”

  Nuadha scoffed. “Ye’ll do no such thing. He will be called Seán. For God has indeed favored me when he gave me ye and this wee bairn.”

  Gael beamed at her husband. “Aye, He has.”

  Chapter 20

  Texas, Present Day

  “That went well.” Callan sat on the sofa next to Laif, smiling up at him. “Think Shane believed everything?”

  Laif watched the boy he wanted for his own and smiled, ruffling his hair. “I think he does in a way, but this was a lot to hit him with. Of course, it did make him feel better, knowing that he wasn’t wholly responsible for what happened with your mom.”

  Callan stared at Laif with a look of wonder in his eyes. The emotion which caught in Laif’s chest brought tears to his eyes. “It would be so amazing to be your dad,” Laif said without thinking first. He didn’t know if Memphis would marry him and telling Callan he wanted to be his dad before she said yes probably wasn’t the best idea, but no way would he take it back.

  “It would?” Callan asked, beads of tears in his own eyes.

  “Oh, yeah, Cal.”

  Callan threw his arms around Laif’s neck and began to cry. Laif pulled him close and held him. When the front door opened and Memphis came into the room from walking Shane down the stairs, she paled and asked, “What’s wrong?”

  Laif shook his head, reached out a hand for her, and when she took it, he pulled her onto his lap. “So, who wants pizza and to find a movie on Netflix?”

  Memphis rubbed her hand up and down Callan’s back and snuggled into Laif. “I’m good with that. What about you, Callan?”

  He nodded, wiped his eyes, and whispered, “Sorry to act like a crybaby.”

  Laif raised his face with a finger to his chin. When Callan looked up, he noticed the tears in Laif’s eyes. “There is nothing wrong with crying. Sometimes, it’s the only way to get through things.” He looked at Memphis. “Isn’t that right?”

  “Yeah,” she said, “it sure is.” She kissed Laif gently, then stood and took the phone to call for the pizza.

  After they’d eaten and Callan had fallen asleep on the floor watching a movie, Memphis asked Laif what had happened while she’d be out in the hall with Shane. He swallowed, told her what he’d said, and waited for her to tell him he shouldn’t have said such a thing.

  But she didn’t. Instead, she took his face in her hands and kissed him. A kiss that promised an eternity of love and paradise. He should go. Before things got too carried away. Which they would if she didn’t stop. She moved back to his lap and suddenly her hands were under his shirt, her fingers moving through his chest hair.

  He moaned into her mouth before he caught her arms and pulled them away from him. “Honey, if you keep doing that, I’m going to carry you to bed and make love to you all night long.”

  Memphis rested her forehead against his and closed her eyes. “If we get married, things are going to change so much.”

  “Is that a bad thing?” he asked warily.

  For a few moments, Memphis didn’t speak. Laif swallowed and waited. And waited. This was it. She was going to tell him she didn’t love him—that she couldn’t marry him. He was going to lose her and Callan before he ever truly had them. He choked on the pain.

  “Laif?” Memphis looked at him, then her eyes softened. “I didn’t mean to scare you. No, it won’t be a bad thing. Just different. It’s been just me and Callan for so long. I’ve had to do everything for myself.”

  She shook her head. “Well, not completely by myself. Joan and Shane have been helpful these last few years. But I haven’t…” She gazed into his eyes. “I haven’t even kissed anyone in twelve years. It’s kind of scary to give myself to someone again. I was so young last time, and I wasn’t very good at it.”

  Laif couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Weren’t good at what?” And then it dawned on him. Not that he wanted to hear any more about her lovemaking with another man, but he couldn’t let her believe that she’d been at fault from Jacob Riley not sticking around when she got pregnant. “Memphis, you are the most passionate woman I know. There is no way that you aren’t good.”


  She laughed without any humor in the sound. “How would you know? We haven’t… You’ve never… How would you know?”

  He tugged her hair at the nape of her neck and forced her head back. “You come alive in my arms. I have never wanted a woman the way I want you. Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to not carry you off every time we’re together and make you truly mine?”

  “I think I do,” she said, smiling. “Are you sure you want to marry me? To be Callan’s dad?”

  “Oh, baby, I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.”

  When he kissed her this time, he knew she knew that he loved them both. He knew her answer was yes. “Say it. Out loud. Tell me you’ll marry me.”

  “Yes. I’ll marry you.” She looked into his eyes. “I love you, Laif. With all my heart.”

  “I love you too.” And Laif kissed her again.

  Laif had left the night before, minutes after she’d agreed to marry him, and now, in the morning light, Memphis was scared to death. What had she been thinking? She couldn’t get married.

  It was hard enough to go out and fight Night Shadows knowing that Callan was waiting for her, how could she ask a man to wait around? And if he became all macho-man on her and told her she couldn’t go out at night, it would kill part of her and ruin what they had. She’d have to tell him she’d made a mistake. She’d have to tell him she couldn’t marry him.

  “Mom?” Callan stood in the kitchen doorway, watching her. When she tried to smile at him, he shook his head “No. You are not backing out of this. He loves us. He wants to be my dad. You are not going to chicken out. Do you hear me? I won’t let you ruin this for us.”

  How did her son know her so well? “Honey. This… well… he doesn’t really know me very well. He thinks I’m his soulmate. Once he sees me fight, he’s going to freak out and want me to quit. And I can’t do that. Not for him. Not for anyone.”

  Callan grinned, shaking his head. “You forgettin’ he’s a Guardian too? He fights Night Shadows. He knows what you do, Mom. He’s not like anyone else. He’s not going to go all caveman and hit you on the head, pull your hair, and drag you off. If he has a problem with things, he’ll talk to you. If you have a problem with things, you’ll talk to him. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do when you love someone? That’s what you’ve always told me. We talk things out. Work until our problems are solved. So, do that with Laif, Mom. I want to marry him. I really want him to be my dad.”

  He’d sounded so grown up, right there until the end. At that point, she remembered how young her son was. He was a boy who needed a father. One like Laif.

  She gave him a nod. “You’re right. I’ll talk to Laif. Maybe I’ll take him out with me tonight, see how he handles what I do. It’s not the same way he fights, and I won’t assume that he’ll have a problem with it. And,” she emphasized, “if he does, we’ll work it out.”

  Callan smiled. “I just want us all to be happy, you know? And I think Laif is going to make us both happy.”

  Laif had agreed to meet Memphis at eleven to go out together and fight the Oíche Scáthanna. Memphis had tucked Callan in over at Joan’s and then returned to her apartment to change into her leather bodysuit. She was inserting her dagger into the ankle sheath tucked into her boot when there was a strong knock on the door.

  She straightened, checked to make sure her braided ponytail was smooth, and opened the door to find Laif dressed in a tight, black TrauMMA Combat t-shirt, black Sprawl Gi-Flex pants, and black combat boots. Memphis stared. Laif Craig made any Hollywood version of GI Joe look like a sissy.

  “If you don’t stop looking at me like that, we won’t go anywhere, and neither one of us will be able to fight after tonight. Crap, Memphis.” He turned his back on her. “You can’t dress that way, all Laura Croft-y, and then stare at me like I’m cream and you’re a cat and expect me to not jump you.”

  She swallowed. “This is what I fight in. Leather protects my body. It moves and breathes. And I do not look like Laura Croft.”

  Shaking his head, Laif turned back to look at her, heat in his eyes. “Honey, you look more like Laura Croft than Angelina Jolie did.”

  That didn’t even make sense. Brow arched, she asked, “What does that mean?”

  He took a step toward her. “It means, sweetheart, that you are one hot woman. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever meet. Ever seen. And that you have a body that makes a man want to lose himself in it for hours at a time.”

  The panic rushed through her in sickening waves. No, no, she pleaded. Not now. Please not now.

  Memphis could feel the color draining from her face. Nausea bubbled from the heavy pit of dread in her stomach, up into her throat. If she didn’t take a deep breath, she’d have to rush to the bathroom and throw up.

  If she fought the attack, she’d be weak for hours. So, she did what she’d learned to do years ago, sinking to the floor and putting her head between her legs. The gasping breaths needed to slow to deep, full breaths.

  Laif was down beside her instantly, his hand soothed as he rubbed her back. This is stupid. She knew it. Had known for years that a man saying she was hot or beautiful didn’t mean she’d be attacked. She hadn’t been a victim, except in her mind, for years. So why did the attacks still come on occasion?

  Memphis didn’t doubt that Laif loved her, and of course, he found her attractive. She certainly found him attractive. She thought him beautiful. There was nothing wrong with thinking someone was beautiful.

  The attacks came on so quickly, only when someone called her hot or beautiful. It stemmed from Gary, her step-pig-of-a-father. Rationally, since she’d gone over a year without an attack, and she’d been called hot, beautiful, and even crude terms many times over the year, she shouldn’t have an attack now. So, stop this nonsense and breath.

  “Memphis, sweetheart, can you hear me? I’m not sure what I did, but I need you to take a deep breath. Can you do that?”

  Gasping, Memphis shook her head. Laif pulled her onto his lap and sat with her there on the floor, rocking back and forth.

  “I’m so sorry. I’m not sure what I said, but I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He kissed the top of her head. “Forgive me.”

  “Nothing…to…forgive,” she stuttered. “Don’t know why—”

  “It’s okay.” He was kissing her hair. Rubbing her back. “Oh, baby, I didn’t mean to make you upset. I’m so sorry.”

  The tears she’d fought back for so many years now fell for all the times she hadn’t cried in the past. For all the pain she’d kept inside since she’d been a little girl and knew that she couldn’t rely on anyone other than herself.

  Memphis cried for the little girl who’d lost her innocence at the hands of the brute her mother had married. And cried for the young woman who had allowed a man to seduce her into bed before she understood that a beautiful face and body didn’t mean the person inside was beautiful as well. She cried for her son going so long with only her to protect him.

  Laif’s body was now so tense, that Memphis knew he was feeling very guilty. She needed him to understand what was going on in her head. But she couldn’t tell him, so she did the only other thing she could think to do. She kissed him.

  The pictures that flashed through Laif’s mind were a blur, the emotions overwhelming. He saw the little girl barely able to get away from the man her mother had married. The fascination grown men had shown to a young child who didn’t understand that those men were just sick, and her beauty wasn’t something wrong with her. He watched from her perspective, as over the years, men whistled, catcalled, and made nasty comments about her looks.

  No wonder she had a hard time with the words hot and beautiful. He sank into the kiss, as Memphis’s memories lead to her feelings for him. Letting him know she was not blaming him, even though he blamed himself.

  “Don’t,” she said into his mouth. The kiss gentled into a light tasting of each other’s lips. Then she moved her mouth to his forehead, brushing her lip
s across it so lightly he barely felt it. “Don’t blame yourself. Freaking out is not a normal reaction to hearing you’re hot by the man you love.”

  He tensed. “You sure you love me?”

  Memphis climbed off his lap. “Laif, you know how I feel. You felt it when I kissed you. I don’t know why I responded the way I did since I haven’t done that in a year, but I’m pretty sure it won’t happen again.”

  The breath Laif let out acted as a release valve. All the tension in his body escaped and he smiled at Memphis.

  “Maybe we can practice until you understand that being beautiful is just part of how you look, but it’s the beauty inside that I love.” His grin deepened. “I think you should let me worship your body until you are comfortable with the fact that you are one hot woman.”

  With a snort, Memphis shook her head and pushed herself off the floor. “If you worship my body now, we aren’t going to go out and fight. And I need you to be okay with what I do, so get up and let’s go.”

  To see Memphis smile after the meltdown she’d just experienced lightened his heart. Laif took her offered hand and came off the floor with ease. “Why wouldn’t I be okay with how you fight the Oíche Scáthanna?”

  She shrugged. “It’s not like how you fight. I don’t use sand. I use a sword and a dagger. I’ve been known to knock out the person the Shadow is in. There are times I have to physically fight them, not just the demons. And, more often than not, it’s men I go up against.”

  He knew that. Laif had seen it with that first kiss, but he’d been focused on other things at the time and hadn’t thought of the danger she put herself in when she went out at night. He knew this would be a major turning point in how she accepted him into her life. He had to say the right things. And even if it bothered him, he’d suck it up and learn to deal with the fact that the woman he loved was a kick-butt demon fighter.