Loner: An Enemies-to-Lovers Standalone Romance

by Harloe Rae

  “Did he get a glimpse under your hood? Or maybe he focused on getting your motor running really smooth?”

  I choke on my tongue. “W-what?”

  She tips her head back and laughs. “Oh, just a little humor. It’s quite all right if that’s the case. I have no room to judge. Trust me, I’m not looking to stir the pot.”

  Heat infuses my cheeks to the point that I’m sweating. I fan my face, blowing out a billow of steam. “This is very uncomfortable for me,” I admit with a whisper.

  Kellie clucks her tongue. “Well, shoot. I don’t mean for it to be.”

  “That’s okay.” A breeze kicks up, blowing loose curls around my face. I tuck the strands behind my ear, appreciating the moment of reprieve. Another layer of strain chips off my rattled frame. “Do you recognize other dogs here?”

  Without hesitation, she plows through my weak attempt at changing the subject. “My son is a complicated man, Keegan.”

  No duh, lady. What was your first clue? Instead of spewing my honest opinion, I plaster on a wide, fake grin. “Really? How so?”

  “He’s always been abrasive and misunderstood. Most people think he’s rude, but that’s just one of his defensive mechanisms. Underneath the surly crap, Ford is a softie.”

  I hum low in my throat. “That’s interesting. I didn’t notice those broody qualities.”

  Kellie barks out a cackle. “It’s all right, Keegan. You don’t have to bullshit with me. That’s kind of you to defend him, though. I can see why Ford is so taken by you.”

  A brittle laugh scrapes out of me. “Oh, I think you’re mistaken. We were just friends.”

  “Past tense?”

  Is she trying to dig for dirt? I study her gentle expression with a wary gaze. There’s nothing waiting for me except kind eyes and a trusting smile. “Yeah, I suppose that’s correct. We haven’t spoken recently.”

  “Pity. He seems to be rather infatuated still.” She turns to give me a slow once-over. “Remember what I said at the shelter?”

  The options scroll through my mind on a twisted loop. “Can I get a hint?”

  Her features manage to brighten another degree. “I was certain that my son would remain single for all of eternity. Heck, he never showed much interest in the opposite sex, from what I could tell. But that went along with his disinterest of people in general. I’d said you two would hit it off. Seems my predictions were accurate.”

  Where is she getting the information to justify these wild claims? “I thought Ford only told you our names.”

  “That’s right, but one look at him was enough to know he’s met his match. Like your daughter and Elsa, some connections really click. You know what I mean?”

  I try not to gape at her, but my jaw seems to have a brain of its own. Is this type of invasive behavior normal for parents? I might need to step up my helicoptering, if that’s the case. It’s hard for me to imagine my mother in this situation. Would she corner Crawford and pry answers out of him? I can’t see her doing that, but my mom wasn’t around to experience me dating anyone of significance. Maybe she’d be a fierce mama bear. That’s a nice vision to imagine. I place a palm over my stomach when the roiling begins. Crying in front of Kellie would be a grave mistake.

  “Um, ah.” The garbled noises stumble out of my mouth. What am I about to admit? Vague for the win. “I guess that’s true.”

  She beams at me, patting my arm. “Then my job here is done.”

  “Good?” Yeah, it’s official. I’ve been bamboozled. To be fair, I stood still and let it happen. I should’ve known. I almost snap my fingers at the sneaky wit of this lady.

  “I’ll be seeing you, Keegan. Take care until next time.” She’s about to vanish faster than she appeared.

  Before she takes two steps, I halt her retreat. “Hey, Kellie?”

  She glances at me over her shoulder. “Yes, dear?”

  I lick my lips, allowing courage to brew inside of me. “Can you do me a favor?”

  “Of course.” Her eyes crinkle in the corners with a genuine smile.

  “If you see Ford, tell him we say hello. And, maybe, that I hope he’s doing well.” Holding a grudge will only allow bitterness to eat away at me. I don’t need another reason to fester over the past. We can be civil adults and move forward in very separate directions.

  Kellie laughs, the sound more of a titter. “Oh, that won’t be necessary.”

  Ouch. I guess being cordial is off the table. Just to test my newfound conviction, I ask, “Why not?”

  Her full smile returns. “I have a feeling the opportunity to tell him yourself will arise very soon.”

  That prediction has me whipping a glance behind me and across both sides. Of course there’s no sign of him. I ignore the sinking sensation in my belly. “I’m not so sure about that,” I murmur.

  “Never doubt a mother’s intuition, right?”

  “If you say so.” I’m sure the stare she’s getting from me is blank.

  Kellie winks at me. “I’ll accept you eating those words when I’m proven to be correct.”

  I can see where Crawford gets his confidence and snarky attitude. “And if you’re wrong?”

  She shakes a finger at me, the scold already clear. “I’m sorry if I led you to believe that was an option. It’s not, dear. What’s happening between you two is just a simple misunderstanding.”

  Once again, I find myself questioning how much she knows. “He wasn’t exactly ambiguous.”

  Kellie leans forward to squeeze my hand. The motherly gestures jumpstarts my stunned heart. “You might assume things are over, but I’m willing to bet Ford is far from done with you.”

  I almost shiver from certainty vibrating in her words. A powerful surge floods my veins a moment later. On a scale of one to being a lost cause, where I do fall if I’m hoping she’s right?

  Healing Hug #29: A shot of pure relief.

  Concrete pumps under my skin with each city block I pass. I’ll be a solid mass ready for battle once I arrive. The miles tick on, erasing more distance between salvation and freedom. Comforting sunshine and my slice of paradise fade in the rearview mirror. All that looms ahead is thundering darkness and soul-sucking shadows. After taking a final left, the steel fortress comes into view. My muscles seize, threatening a lockdown on their own accord. But this is something I must do. Fear doesn’t exist in my vocabulary since he disgraced me for the final time.

  The parking lot is decorated with luxury vehicles in all shapes and colors. My bike stands out like a bolt of chrome lightning in the midnight sky. Seems fitting, since I’ve always been an inky stain on my father’s manufactured prestige. I speed toward the front and snag a guest spot. Security will realize I don’t belong when my tires are burning rubber on the way out. I’ve always excelled at making an exit.

  After dismounting the only worthy ride in plain sight, I stride to the arching metal entrance someone paid way too much for. The thick soles of my boots pound into the pavement. That steady beat conducts the rhythm attempting to go wild in my chest. I’m finally taking Keegan’s advice and facing my largest demon. Slaying him to the ground would be my preference, but saying my piece will have to suffice.

  I swing open the set of frosty glass doors, revealing a disturbing amount of stark white. Dressed in all black and leather, I’m the instant target for anyone with decent eyesight. Lucky for me, this is the last place where I want to belong. The lobby smells heavily of plastic, rotting dreams, and fitting into a mold. One whiff of the artificial odor singes my nostrils. I couldn’t survive a day trapped within these pristine walls.

  The receptionist tilts her chin up at me, the angle sharp and haughty as fuck. If she thinks that bullshit display is making anybody feel inferior, I can give her a few pointers. I pay her zero mind and stride by without a second glance. A stunned squeak puffs from her injected lips, but I’m already too far gone.

  A small jolt shoots through me when I notice the tracks of mud trailing behind me. So much for his spot
less floors. That’s the first jab of happiness anything related to my dad has brought me. I even let a crooked smirk tip my lips. A bit of payback after years of torture.

  The massive corner suite beckons me. A wrought iron distressed door isn’t hard to find against the muted background. Father dearest might appreciate order and uniform simplicity, but his demand to stand out from the pack rules higher.

  His secretary leaps from her seat when she catches me approaching. “You can’t go in there. He’s in the middle of—”

  I throw a hand up, cutting her off. “This will only take a minute of his precious time.”

  With that, I barrel into his office as if the devil himself is chasing me. A loud crack of wood against drywall announces my entrance. My father looks up from a stack of paperwork without any sign of distress. His beady brown eyes narrow on me.

  “You might be my son, but barging in unannounced is unacceptable. Nice fucking stunt you’re pulling in front of my staff.”

  “Figured I’d return the favor for once. Am I disturbing your precious routine?” I begin picking the dirt from under my fingernails.

  A joint pops in his wrinkled cheek. “Who the hell do you think you are?”

  “A man pushed far enough to quit caring about wounded pride. What’s a little more?”

  He taps his pen to an agitated beat. “Temper tantrums at your age aren’t attractive, Crawford. It’s no wonder you’re single.”

  “Just like it’s no secret why mom cheated on you. She wasn’t willing to waste more years. I’ve finally come to that point myself.”

  A ruddy tint bursts across his cheeks. I almost expect flames to erupt from his eye sockets. The glare he’s shooting at me is meant to detonate and destroy. He grips his armrests with white knuckles, leaning back in the chair until the springs creak for mercy. “I’d ask what you’re doing here, but I have a feeling you have an agenda. Why don’t you get on with this desperate act for attention so I can return to what’s truly important?”

  “You’re a piece of shit,” I spit. “Because of you, I almost threw away the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me. You’ve always cut me down, but those days are over. I never want to see your smarmy face at my shop again. Forget where I live.”

  His face screws up in a distorted grimace. “Is this about that whore—”

  I stomp toward him until my broad frame towers over his hunched position. “Stop talking or I’ll rip all of those words out of your mouth.”

  “Threatening your old man?” He might have a set of brass balls, but I catch the way his gaze skitters off mine.

  “Seems only fair after the hell you’ve put me through.” I cross my arms, leaning further into his space.

  His expression is deranged, shifty and unstable. I widen my stance to brace for impact. He catches my slight movement, narrowing his eyes into barely visible slits. “Oh, poor little Crawford. My son can’t handle strong guidance or the truth. But you’ve always been weak.”

  I dig my toe into his beige carpet, smearing grime into the plush beige fibers. “That might be true, but I’m done being a spineless wimp. This toxic association between us ends today if you refuse to change. You’ll be dead to me, but maybe that’s what you’d prefer.”

  My father is quiet for a moment, staring me down without so much as blinking. “I’d threaten to cut you off, but you’ve never taken my money. Your brother, on the other hand, has lost his damn mind. I assume you have everything to do with that.”

  “Grant is his own person. I’ll admit to being fucking giddy that he finally wised up and came to his senses. But how he chooses to run his life is all on him, and he has his own amends to make with me. I refuse to be your verbal punching bag for another second. If you need to feel better about yourself, go see a therapist.”

  A chuckle that lacks any ounce of humor jostles his paunchy gut. “Thanks for the advice, Ford. I’m of sound mind and go to bed each night without a single worry. You, on the other hand, are one fatal disaster after the next.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong, pops. I’m finally seeing things clearly. This is for Keegan and Millie and the happiness I almost let you destroy. Just because you’re miserable doesn’t mean I have to be. You’re a miserable schmuck. I have every intention of redeeming myself.” I deserve some damn closure to smooth over this shit cannon.

  “Good luck with that, boy. You’re antisocial. Always was, always will be.” His putrid breath contaminates the sterile air pumping through the vents. It takes all of my control not to gag.

  A tight smile bends my mouth. “Only because I’ve been letting your opinion define me. I’m ready to move on.”

  “With a single mother and her mute child? They’ll never stick around. You’re being a naive fool, which is no surprise.”

  He might be right about that, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take. Fear will no longer dictate my decisions. I won’t stand silent and ruin the potential of finding love. Hell, if luck is lenient enough to grant me a favor, I’ve already found it.

  “Well, that’s on me.” I straighten, separating us with some much-needed space.

  “It most certainly is. It makes me almost proud that you can accept defeat.” He juts his jaw, resembling a bulldog. The image is fitting in this situation.

  “I can tell you’re not ready to accept our differences, but guess what? I can be the bigger man.” I slap my chest, the strength within gaining momentum. “Holding grudges has caused enough damage. I’m not interested in loose ends and unanswered questions. If you truly want to be a family again, fucking prove it. When you’re ready to make peace, come find me. Grant will be waiting, too.”

  His sneer shows off the pearly whites he spent a fortune on. “How fucking cute. My sons are finally a team again.”

  “Isn’t that nice? You lost a partner, but I gained one.”

  He sputters on his inflated ego. “Grant is working at that filthy garage with you?”

  “Damn straight. I’d say it’s long overdue. Maybe we’ll send you a flyer once the logo is updated.”

  “Gloating does nothing to impress me.”

  “No? Could’ve sworn you tried teaching me the opposite.”

  “Being a grease monkey is never going to get you a decent woman.”

  “And the days of me tolerating your disrespect are over. Keep that in mind before dropping by.”

  “I’m not listening to this from you.” My father swats the air, dismissing me with a flick of his wrist.

  My patience snaps faster than a fraying piece of twine. I lunge forward and grip his collar. “You better hear me. If I see you again with this shitty attitude, prepare for a restraining order.”

  “Is that supposed to scare me?”

  I pat his cheek in the same patronizing manner he’s always done to me. “Nah, it’s just some friendly words of advice. Take it or leave it, pops.”

  He struggles out of my hold, forcing me backward. “Get out of my sight, you ungrateful little shit.”

  “With pleasure.” I slam out of his office the same way I came in, taking great satisfaction when the wood splinters further.

  The slaying is done. Not an ounce of remorse or regret weighs me down. All I feel is relief whisking the ache away. The iron walls constantly holding me back vanish and I’m free to move forward.

  There are two girls waiting on me, whether they realize it or not. My pulse thumps faster with each rushed stomp out of this prison. Hopefully I’m not too late and they’re still willing to be mine.

  Only one way to find out.

  Healing Hug #30: For chances not necessarily earned, but given regardless.

  I walk along the cobbled path with too many thoughts fighting for control. The words blur and stick together, forming a clusterfuck of epic proportions. Prickles of doubt battle with stony resolve. Where do I even begin? How will I fix this? Why didn’t I come sooner? Is this going to be a massive failure? Do they even want me to try? My arms are loaded up with tokens of apology. The
need to grovel has never struck me until I let Keegan and Millie slip away. I’m ready to crash down onto my knees and beg for their forgiveness.

  The door swings open before I can knock. Keegan stands just beyond the threshold, wearing a grimace to match the threadbare tee that’s one stitch away from ripping apart. Her shirt would pair well with the tatters of my heart. I almost smile at the sight. Just having her within reach has relief pumping into my deprived veins.

  Keegan quirks a skeptical brow, but she doesn’t appear surprised to see me. Her visible irritation makes it seem as though she’s been expecting me. “Can I help you?”

  “I’m an idiot,” I blurt. That’s what I open with? I truly am an idiot.

  That slim brow arches higher. “Newsflash, Ford. That’s not a secret.”

  I thrust the flowers at her. “These are for you. I have some for Millie, too.”

  Keegan accepts the heaping bunch, but barely glances at the colorful assortment. “Thanks.”

  I try not to let her terse tone discourage me, but the clamp around my ribs cranks tighter. A shallow exhale breezes through my frown. I peer around Keegan’s steely blockade. Millie hovers on the last stair, gripping onto the banister with both arms. She’s hesitant, keeping a safe distance, and I don’t blame her.

  I swallow the thick lump clogging my throat. “Hey, Peep. I’m really sorry for leaving when you were upset. And for not saying goodbye. There’s so much I need to apologize for. Maybe you’ll be able to forgive me one day.”

  My peace offering for her now feels insignificant and small. Millie’s bundle is also full of vibrant blooms, much like the arrangement I brought for Keegan. Her variety has a few special additions. Instead of leafy green accents, the florist used gumdrops and jellybeans. I thought it was a nice touch for the little candy addict.

  Keegan snatches the second bouquet out of my hands. “You can’t just swoop in and expect us to instantly forget what happened. I’m not going to collapse into your arms, grateful that you showed up.”