In Other Words

by Jennifer Woodhull

  As we chat over dinner, I try to catch myself to keep my gaze from venturing beyond attentive friend and into creepy staring territory. I have to wonder, though, how she got even more insanely fucking beautiful since the last time we saw each other. As she tells me about her new place, she looks up from her margarita, and I swear there’s a twinkle in her eye that looks like it’s straight from the low-budget special effects department of a nineteen-seventies TV show.

  Clair is gorgeous by any standards with her long blonde hair, big blue eyes, turned up little nose, and the fullest lips that curl up into a breathtaking smile. And her laugh? Her laugh is big and warm and infectious. I’d crawl across the dessert, bare-assed in the heat of summer just to hear that sound—to see that smile that lights up the whole damn world more brightly than the sun.

  I’m about six feet tall, and Clair is maybe five inches shorter than me. She’s slim with the type of curves that would easily land her work as a model or spokesperson if she were interested in that sort of thing. What people don’t immediately see, though, is what makes her infinitely more beautiful. She’s interesting and energetic. She’s kind and compassionate. She comes up with some wicked puns, and hates to see anyone hurt. She’s truly the best person I know.

  She’s also the reason I haven’t found the right girl. See, in Dexland, she is the right girl.

  I’ve been in love with her basically the whole time I’ve known her. People would jump to the obvious conclusions about that. Nerd falls for unattainable cheerleader. They’d be wrong, though.

  If anything, when I first met Sinclair, I was a judgmental asshole.

  When she came up to ask me a couple of questions after a class I was teaching, I thought, Great. Another hot girl who thinks she can flirt with me and get me to influence her grade. Looking like that, she’s probably not the brightest crayon in the box either.

  We started talking, and since we both had our next class on the other side of campus, we walked the same direction as we talked. After that first day, and the next, and the next after that, I could see how wrong I’d been. I had done exactly the same thing people had done to me my whole life.

  Nerd. Geek. Scrawny. Awkward. Boring. Weirdo. Difficult.

  Changing the assumptions to hot cheerleader, airhead, and flirting to get ahead was no better. I felt like a complete jerk for judging her so harshly without getting to know her.

  Clair was real, and although we were becoming the best of friends, it didn’t take long to realize my feelings ran much deeper than just friendship.

  There was a time I planned to tell her how I felt, but that was a long time ago. I know one day she’ll settle down, get married, and I’ll lose the tiny acorn of hope that my heart can’t seem to quite let go of that something could happen between us.

  Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

  “So,” she continues between bites of her chicken soft taco, “When do I get to meet his new friend who has helped you so much?”

  “Oh, I guess I hadn’t thought about that,” I lie. I’ve thought a lot about it, and was hoping to buy some time before I introduce her to my friend the pro ball player and girl-magnet.

  “I tell you what,” she says cautiously. “The girls and I are going to Breuhaus on Saturday afternoon. I was going to invite you anyway. Bring him along if you want.” She must notice my expression fall. She knows me better than anyone, after all.

  “Don’t make that face.” She flicks her gaze toward me from under her brows. “I know, you haven’t always loved my girlfriends but you haven’t hung out with them in years. We did all grow up, after all.”

  She tosses a wadded up napkin at me and I can’t help but smile. She wouldn’t throw me to the wolves, and I know it, so there can’t be any harm in hanging out with her cheerleader friends from college for an afternoon.

  “Okay. I’ll see if Cole’s in town.” I match her smile as I toss the napkin-ball back her way.

  She’s not mine to protect, and she might not even like the guy. Still, I’ve seen the parade of women Cole has dated and I don’t relish the thought of him adding hers to the trail of broken hearts in his wake.

  I’ll just talk to him. Let him know that she’s not one-night-stand material. Besides…Clair’s right. I guess Cole and I really are friends now. If he seems to like her, I’ll clear it all up before he asks her out.

  CHAPTER 3

  Sinclair

  AS I UNPACK ONE of five boxes labeled bathroom, looking for my flatiron, a loud chirping sound diverts my attention. I look through the glass of the large French doors and see a mockingbird, the state bird of Texas, chirping from the back of one of the patio chairs.

  I love how bright and open my new house feels. After years of being cramped in a tiny apartment with barely-there windows, the light pouring in from the backyard was one of the top reasons I picked this place. The long, white built-in bookshelves in the living room were another.

  Opening the third box on my quest for stylish locks, I can’t believe I have this much stuff. I’ve spent the last two years living in a five hundred square foot apartment after all. Then I remember how much I had squirreled away in the storage shed on the ranch—the property my parents retired to that’s about an hour outside of town.

  Once my sister and I were out of the house, our parents sold the small, suburban two-story in which we were raised and moved to the country. They’re the only empty nesters in history to upsize. Now they have room for horses, dogs, and llamas. Yes, llamas.

  They aren’t ranchers by any stretch of the imagination, and they don’t keep livestock, per se. The herd basically occupies the place as very well-cared-for pets. Mom watched a documentary about them and became obsessed with having some. Since Dad gives her everything she wants—always—a ranch, complete with llamas, is exactly what she got.

  I hear the melodic digital tune that tells me my phone is ringing. After a few minutes of searching, I find it just before it stops.

  Kelly. It’s as if she received some psychic message that I was thinking of her.

  “Hey, sis! So, tell me, how are things in Llamaland?” She asks through a giggle.

  “Oh, you know, a few close shaves, but no one is going to pull the wool over my eyes.” I laugh harder than she does, but I don’t care. “How’s Chicago, city girl?”

  Her fiancé is from Chicago and secured a residency there after med school. The wedding is months away, but she’s already giddy with anticipation at being Mrs. Dr. Logan Ellison. At least one of us took Mom’s advice.

  “Fabulous! There are so many things to do...amazing restaurants, and the shopping...good lord, the shopping! How’s your new place?” She takes a breath long enough to ask.

  “I think I’m going to like it.” I reply. “Of course, after two years in a New York apartment, two thousand square feels expansive by comparison.”

  “I can’t wait to see it when we’re down for the holidays,” she replies.

  She says she doesn’t think she’ll get to visit any sooner. I miss my little sister and would love to spend some time with her before she is swept up in full-fledged wedding mania.

  “We’re getting the house settled here, and there’s so much planning to do. You don’t even know,” her voice gets quieter and it sounds as though she’s walking around. When she speaks again, it’s obvious she’s trying not to be overheard. “I knew Logan’s parents had money, but holy shit, Sinclair! This wedding is getting out of control. I think the mayor is coming. Can you believe that shit? The freaking mayor!”

  “That’s pret-ty crazy,” I reply, knowing she probably loves every minute of it. “So, I take it your future in-laws have a hand in the guest list?”

  “They do, I’m afraid. But ya know…,” she trails off and unfortunately, I know exactly what she’ll say next. “Logan has a cousin, Matt, that is super-hot and just broke up with his girlfriend.”

  I roll my eyes at the realization my dread is well-founded. Then, a disembodied voice escapes from my m
outh over which I seem to have no control.

  “Actually, I’m seeing someone.”

  Shit! Why on Earth did I say that of all things?

  “Rea-lly? Do tell!” I hear the smirk in her voice. “This is the first guy I’ve heard you talk about since Rob.”

  I wince at the mention of the guy I dated for about a year in New York. I broke things off when I finally realized he didn’t care about my feelings or interests. All I was to him was a pretty prop—an accessory for his picture perfect life.

  “Who is he? Where’d you meet him? How hot is he on a scale of one-to-ten? Speaking of a scale of one-to-ten…hmm?” I hear the determination in Kelly’s voice, and can’t seem to bring myself to back-peddle.

  “Well, it’s really new, so I don’t want to say too much just yet.” I hope against hope that the vague answer will satisfy her.

  “Oh…wait. Please tell me it’s not Captain Nerd Crush,” she says, blowing out an aggravated breath.

  “I’ve asked you not to call him that,” I reply, annoyed at the cruel nickname she has used for Dex the whole time I’ve known him. “I had dinner with him the other night, by the way, and he’s doing great. I’ll make sure to tell him you asked about him.”

  “Well, I’m glad he’s doing great. I know he’s your friend, it’s just crazy to me how you crushed on him all through college. What a waste! He’s so skinny, and those glasses. Ugh!” She makes an exaggerated sound that reminds me she is four years younger than me in age, and the gap is even wider when it comes to maturity.

  “Actually, he looks a little different from the last time you saw him. He’s been working out, and he changed his hair a little.” I’m unsure why I feel the need to defend Dex to my baby sister of all people.

  There was never anything wrong with his hair, or his body, or his glasses or anything else about him. I’ve always thought he was hot. The added confidence he seems to have found just takes him from blaze to inferno as far as I’m concerned.

  “Well, good for him. But I hear you trying to change the subject, so back to our mystery man…,” she trails off again, but it’s clear she won’t be deterred.

  “I’m not ready to talk about him yet. I will say…I met him through a friend, and yes, he’s hot. I’m not sure where we are just yet, but if all goes well, maybe I’ll be bringing him to your wedding as my date.” I pinch the bridge of my nose between my thumb and forefinger as the lie snowballs.

  My sister squeals into the phone. “I can’t wait! Maybe this is the one, Sinclair. Can you imagine, if we both got married one right after the other, how happy Mom would be?”

  “That she would,” I sigh. “But seriously, cool your jets. We’ve only been out a couple of times. Just…give me some space. I promise, if things get serious, you’ll be the first to know.” Even the two fingers I have crossed don’t make me feel any better about this whopper of a story I’ve concocted.

  “Okay, gotta run. Logan’s mom is picking me up to go look at some piece of antique furniture she wants to buy us as a wedding gift.” She says it with a sigh that doesn’t quite disguise her glee. “Love you, Sinclair. Call me soon, and keep me posted!”

  “Love you, too, Kel. Talk soon.”

  Great. Somehow, I’ve conjured up an imaginary boyfriend that my sister will expect to meet at her wedding. Still, that’s months away. Maybe I’ll just say it didn’t work out and ask Dex to go with me. We would have a blast, and I’ll probably need the moral support.

  In any case, I’ve got time to worry about that problem. Right now, my problem is locating my bathroom stuff so I can get ready to go meet my friends for a reunion dinner at Breuhaus.

  .-- --- -. -.. . .-.

  At the restaurant, I go around back to the beer garden and find Anna and Lily seated at a table near the back lawn.

  “Oh my god!” Anna squeals when she sees me. “I’m so glad you’re back.” She throws her arms around my neck. “God, you look gorgeous! So fucking annoying,” she laughs.

  Lily’s greeting is equally warm and enthusiastic. They’ve stayed in Dallas, and I was a little worried about feeling like an outsider—a third wheel–having been gone so long. Within an hour, though, it feels just like old times.

  Anna catches me up on the guy she just broke up with. Lily has been trying a dating app, but hasn’t really met anyone. I guess looking for and not finding the right guy is one thing we still all have in common.

  After we talk for a while, I let them know Dex will be joining us and bringing a friend of his.

  “You know, I heard his company is doing really well,” Lily says coyly.

  “Yeah, I heard that too. Speaking of…is he seeing anyone?” Anna arches up a brow.

  “Whoa, down girl.” I chuckle. “You never gave him the time of day when we were in school. If you try to chase him now, he’ll see right through that.”

  Lily and I look at each other, then start singing in unison, “I ain’t sayin’ she a gold digger,” cleaning up the next lines. Even Anna laughs with us.

  “Yeah, okay, okay.” Anna waves off our joke. “It wouldn’t matter anyway. You’d never let any of us anywhere near him. We all know you had a huge crush on him in school.” Lily piles on, good-naturedly, until I stop them.

  “Whatever…anyway, that was a long time ago.” I lie, not letting on to how serious my feelings for Dex really were, not to mention how recent. As in, up until I left for New York, recent. Before I came home, I worked hard to shift my mindset where he’s concerned, and I hope I’ve been successful.

  “Speak of the devil.” Lily nods toward the direction behind me as she takes a sip of her margarita.

  “And the devil’s got a hot friend, too. Yum-my,” Anna purrs.

  “Hi. You mind if we crash this party?” I stand and turn, hugging Dex more tightly than might be warranted, considering I just saw him a few days ago.

  “I’m so glad you made it! Dex, you remember Lily, and Anna.”

  “Hi, ladies. Thanks for letting us tag along tonight.” He waves warmly to everyone and I appreciate this small effort, knowing the girls have given him shit in the past.

  “This is my friend, Cole.” Dex gestures to the tall, good-looking guy beside him.

  “Hi,” Cole says with a wave as he steps forward. “Nice to meet you all.”

  Anna cocks her head to the side and slowly brings her hand to her mouth. “Oh my god! You’re—you’re Colton Bright!”

  “Wait…you play for the Frontiersmen, don’t you?” Lily asks, her face flashing recognition.

  “Guilty, I’m afraid.” He flashes a grin that I suspect often gets him whatever he wants. “I just signed a new contract, so whaddya say to me buying the next round of drinks to celebrate?”

  He looks around the table, and I’m disappointed when he takes the empty seat next to me, leaving Dex the spot at the opposite end next to Anna.

  “So, Colton,” Lily starts, and he cuts her off.

  “Please,” he gives a soft chuckle, “Only my grandmother calls me that. I’m just Cole.”

  “Okay, Cole,” Lily continues, batting her eyelashes. “You’re not from Dallas, are you?”

  “You caught me. Yep, I’m another one of those carpetbagger ball players down here stealing a job away from a Texan.” He shrugs sheepishly while flashing a charming smile. “I’m from Ohio, actually. Near Dayton.”

  “You’re a pitcher, right?” Anna asks. I can see her looking down and know she must be stealing glances at her phone.

  “I am. Are you a big baseball fan?”

  “I follow it a little.” She responds sweetly, looking up at him from under her lashes.

  “Oh, please! Since when?” I shake my head and grin.

  “Since…well, you’ve been gone two years, Sinclair…A girl can get new hobbies!” Anna cocks her head to the side a little and narrows her eyes at me.

  Cole laughs, and I look down the table at Dex and mouth the words, “Shoot me now.”

  “Listen, I tell you what, ladies.
It’s a few months until the season’s back on, but I promise I’ll get you all some tickets so you can come watch a game for yourselves and see just how good a time we have down at Frontier Field. How does that sound?” Cole looks around the table.

  My friends nod their heads and effuse words of appreciation.

  “Thanks for that,” I tell Cole. “That’s very generous of you.”

  “Not generous at all. It’s easy enough to get tickets. Besides, I’m really being selfish.” He leans in conspiratorially. “The guys on the team will think I’m some sort of god if I bring along such a beautiful cheering section.”

  “Did you say cheer?” Anna asks.

  Oh no. Not this. Please, not this.

  In a flash, both girls are standing up. Lily is pulling me to my feet as Anna runs off to ask the bartender to play the song.

  “Come on, Captain,” Anna says coyly as they pull me to the little yard at the back of the beer garden.

  “I just want to apologize now for what’s about to happen,” I call to Dex over my shoulder as I’m pulled away, but he’s smiling the broadest smile, his eyes fixed on mine.

  We take our positions and Dex walks over, holding his phone at the ready. I really thought I had left this part of my life behind, but even though we’re well into our twenties now, my friends don’t ever seem to want to let it go.

  I stand in front of Anna and Lily. Our feet are hip width apart, arms straight, hands clenched into loose fists. The music comes on, and Anna starts the two-one-two clap, joined by Lily and me in turn. Soon, we hear the familiar refrain of Toni Basil’s Hey Mickey. We march in place, arms going out and back, crossing and dropping as we step to the side and back.