The Tome of Bill Series: Books 5-8 (Goddamned Freaky Monsters, Half A Prayer, The Wicked Dead, The Last Coven)

by Rick Gualtieri

  His friend backed off, aghast at the display. Even these days, with vamps knowing what I was, it still freaked some out to see one vampire bite into another. It’s always the predators who are the most surprised to find they’ve become the prey.

  Another cry of pain filled the room, one that I recognized. Playtime was over. I crunched down again, then shoved the HBC vamp off me.

  Rolling to my feet, I spat out three fingers and turned toward where I’d heard Ed.

  The vamp he’d been squaring off against had gotten inside of his defenses and sunk his teeth into the meat of my roommate’s bicep - meager as it was. Fuck.

  I braced myself for a burst of speed so as to come to my friend’s aid, and that’s right about when shit got real.

  ♦ ♦ ♦

  “END THIS NONSENSE IMMEDIATELY!!”

  The compulsion rang out with enough force to instantly erase all of my momentum, maybe even knocking me back a few inches past where I’d started.

  James stood at the room’s entrance, looking none too pleased. Calibra was by his side, her expression more that of one who’d walked into their children’s bedroom to find a minor mess.

  The effect was instantaneous. The four HBC vamps ceased what they were doing as their eyes glazed over. They stood still like statues, offering no more threat. Tom was on the floor, staring unblinking at the ceiling. The compulsion had plowed through his defenses like a freight train.

  Ed, however, merely stood there clutching his arm and glaring at the vamp who’d bitten him. “Fucking asshole.”

  “Curious,” Calibra said. “How is it you...”

  And that’s when his attacker burst apart in an explosion of guts and white fire.

  Oh boy. When it rains, it sure as shit pours.

  White Lies

  Even if James’s sudden appearance hadn’t taken the fight out of the remaining HBC vamps, watching their buddy explore the finer aspects of self-immolation most certainly did. Needless to say, they were suitably freaked out. Not only were they in the presence of the legendary Freewill - albeit that hadn’t dissuaded them from trying to kick my ass - but they found themselves confronted by the Northeastern Prefect, a member of the Draculas, and whatever the hell Ed was able to do. All in all, it was probably like walking into a diner and coming face to face with the Pope, the President, and Kim Kardashian all eating a lunch of boiled baby meat together.

  James walked forward and gave me the barest of glances out of the corner of his eye. It spoke volumes to the fact that we’d no doubt have some words later on.

  When he reached the middle of the room, he released his hold on the compelled vamps. “Tell me why you attacked the Freewill. I am unaware of any open hostilities between Howard Beach and Village Covens. As I need not explain to anyone present, this is an ill time for intra-coven feuds. Such nonsense is intolerable.”

  It was well known in the vampire community that when a member of the Draculas told you to jump, your feet had better be off the ground before they finished that sentence.

  Apparently, Bat-man didn’t get the memo, though. He stepped forward, eyes wide, and pointed at Ed. “What the fuck is that, man?” Oh well, his funeral.

  Calibra raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. Interesting. Colin wouldn’t have wasted an opportunity to crawl up James’s ass and get nice and comfy.

  “Manuel,” James replied tolerantly, proving once more than he was cut from a different material than most vampires, “kindly answer my question. I requested information from you. I shan’t do so twice.”

  That got their attention. His two remaining buddies backed up a step as if to distance themselves from the inevitable splatter. The first one, Manuel, I presumed, finally seemed to take the hint. He focused on James as if seeing him for the first time. His face turned a shade paler in the process as he averted his eyes.

  “My apologies. Didn’t mean no disrespect, man...I mean, sir.”

  Jeez, how come I never got any brown-nosing like that?

  “A couple hours ago,” he continued, “these two Village Coven bitches came waltzing into our den like they owned the place.”

  “Were they alone?”

  “No. They was flanking this big dude. Never seen him before. Guy was dressed like some fucking weirdo. Wearing some kind of skirt, but up top, he was sporting a Kevlar vest, like maybe he’d just stolen it from a cop.”

  Considering what had occurred earlier at the office, I deemed that an entirely likely scenario.

  “Anything else about him?”

  “He had long hair, like some rock star, and he was sportin’ ink.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yeah, a moon and star on his shoulders, and some kind of monster on his chest. Couldn’t see it too well with that vest on, though.”

  “What happened then?”

  “I don’t know. I walked up and told them they was uninvited - to get the fuck out.”

  “And...”

  Manny seemed hesitant to continue, but one did not try their luck with the Draculas. Finally, he said, “And this big fucker just backhanded me. Next thing I know, my hombres here was smackin’ me awake. I got back to my feet and saw that everyone else was gone.”

  James turned his attention to the two other HBC vamps. “And you didn’t witness anything?”

  One of them shook his head. “We were out hunting.”

  “This is worrisome,” James said. It was more to himself than anyone, but Manny apparently decided he was being addressed.

  “Shit, yeah, it’s worrisome.” He turned and pointed a finger at me. “What the fuck did you do with my people, asshole?”

  “Me?”

  “Yeah, that’s your group. They don’t take a shit unless you tell them to.”

  Oh, if only that were true. But at least that answered why this guy tried to send my head into the outfield upon seeing me.

  “The Freewill is not to blame,” James said dismissively as he turned away. Something plainly bothered him, but I figured the present company was most likely not in the need for knowing. “He just recently returned from...First Coven related business.”

  He turned to me. “Gather your friends. We need to go.”

  “That’s it?” Manny complained, seeming to, once more, forget he was in the presence of one of the thirteen most powerful vampires in the world. Some people just didn’t learn. “This fucker kidnaps our people and he just walks?”

  Finally, Calibra broke her silence. “As Prefect, your coven’s safety falls to me. You will provide me with names and descriptions for all of your missing members, and I will do everything I can to make sure they are accounted for.”

  “Okay fine, but what about this freak?” He pointed an accusing finger at Ed, who’d moved over to help Tom back to his feet. It was rare to see a vamp push his luck so many times. At the very least, I had to give him credit for having more balls than brains.

  James turned back. That couldn’t be a good thing. A part of me wished I’d brought a rain slicker because this was going to get messy.

  Instead, he simply asked, “You are aware of our war, no?”

  “Of course,” Manny replied.

  “Then know that in any war, new weapons are developed to better fight one’s enemies.”

  “Weapons?”

  “Classified weapons. I can tell you no more, but I will stress the importance of discretion. All you need know is that he is on our side and will be of great importance in the coming days.”

  What the fuck?

  James’s answer seemed to mollify Manny, though, who nodded knowingly and turned his attention back to Calibra.

  Unfortunately, it had the opposite effect on me.

  What the fuck did he know about Ed that I didn’t?

  ♦ ♦ ♦

  Calibra stayed behind, telling us she’d catch up shortly. We’d agreed beforehand to visit all uncompromised Village Coven lairs first, saving one for last in case those didn’t pan
out. It was risky returning to the office. It was an active crime scene now. There were bound to be cops still there, even with all the weird shit happening in the city.

  As if to accentuate this point, a strange cry pierced the night as we made our way back to the subway tunnel entrance.

  “What the fuck?” Tom asked, having finally recovered from having his brains scrambled.

  “River Naga,” James said offhandedly, trudging forward as if that sort of thing were normal. “We can assume one has taken up residence nearby. You may wish to avoid the waterways for the time being. They are not on our side.”

  “Um, okay,” I replied, making a note to grab my Monster Manual the second I got home. “So, what was that stuff about Ed back there?” I glanced back at my roommate, but he raised his hands and waved me off, apparently knowing when to keep his mouth shut.

  “Huh?”

  “Ed. You said he was a weapon being...”

  “Oh, that?” he replied dismissively. “A lie, made up to pacify them. Nothing more. I was hoping perhaps one of you could enlighten me.” The weird thing was, his tone suggested otherwise - as if Ed’s odd new condition was the furthest thing from his mind. Even so, he had piqued my curiosity.

  “Why didn’t you just compel them to forget him, then?”

  “Did you see their eyes, Dr. Death?” he asked, giving me only the barest of looks. “Fear is a very strong emotion, and they were terrified. Even with my power, it is possible such a compulsion wouldn’t hold for long. Then what? We just barely managed to maintain order during the Icon incident.”

  Hopefully, he didn’t notice me wince. It was far more than a mere incident to me.

  “The last thing we need is another panic. If they think your friend is some sort of secret weapon, though, that becomes a completely different story. They will be curious, but that curiosity will be tempered by knowing that one doesn’t pry into the affairs of the First.”

  “And if they blab?” Ed asked.

  “Then they shall be doing us a favor - spreading word that we are even more formidable. They will foster confidence instead of chaos.”

  Holy shit, that was pretty fucking smart. He’d essentially turned their frowns upside down with just a few well-placed spoonfuls of bullshit. It was impressive.

  “Do not get me wrong.” He stopped and turned to face us, his gaze falling on Ed primarily. “There will be an accounting for this.”

  That wouldn’t be pretty for any of us. I seriously doubted it would shed more light on the situation other than our compounded lies. We’d been ordered to hunt down Sheila and instead allied with her - tried to save her. For me, there was never any other option.

  “I do not know what you are other than not fully human. I have sensed as much since I arrived. That was faith magic you somehow employed, yet you are no Icon.”

  “How do you...”

  “Please.” James softened his tone a bit. “I observed you all up in Canada. In my many years, I have come to trust in my judgment of others. I can tell you are a loyal friend of Dr. Death’s, but a man of even moderate faith? I think not.”

  I chuckled, despite the seriousness of the situation. It was either laugh or run off screaming into the night.

  Fortunately for us all, Tom’s lack of tact in situations like these was sometimes a near godsend. “So what has you so spooked?”

  That was a double facepalm for Ed and me. There were so many better ways to ask such a question than to insinuate one of the most powerful creatures we’d ever met was shaking in his boots like a preteen in a haunted corn maze. One of these days, I really needed to take out a large life insurance policy on him. The odds of collecting were certainly in my favor.

  James, though, proving that he was perhaps as spooked as my friend had implied, merely uttered a sigh as he reached the stairs leading down to the subway. “Many of these myths are from before my time. I had hoped my remembrance of them was wrong, which is partially why I left Colin behind.”

  “I’m not following,” I replied.

  “Believe me when I say that I fully understand your feelings toward my assistant.” James started downward into the closed station, pausing only to casually rip the locked gate open. “I am well aware that even on his best days, Colin is near insufferable.”

  “Then why...”

  “Because he is good at what he does. He is highly organized and has a near photographic memory. Our archives are not like some sort of...Wikipedia page. They are vast and have been laid down in myriad of tomes across a multitude of languages - some long dead. I doubt even Lord Alexander could retrieve certain bits of lore quickly. Yet Colin has an almost preternatural ability to make sense of them, cross referencing their many secrets. Before leaving, I gave him full authority to access them.”

  That didn’t sound good. Knowledge was power, and James had handed a potential atom bomb to a smarmy dickhead who just so happened to despise me. “Isn’t that a bit...risky?”

  “Perhaps, but not as risky as what has potentially been unleashed against us.”

  “Is that what he called about?”

  “Yes, and now with the eyewitness accounts by the Howard Beach Coveners to back up your own claims, I fear we are hunting a creature who may be far more than just a vampire with dissenting political leanings.”

  He turned and faced us again, the dark tunnel looming behind him.

  “The Cult of Ib has returned.”

  The Cult of Ib

  “I think I speak for all of us when I ask, what’s a Cult of Ib?”

  “Yeah,” Ed added. “And why was he coming after me earlier? Normally, when things go to shit, Bill is the target.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Don’t mention it.”

  Things were unnaturally quiet. I mean, I’ve been in far more than my fair share of the New York City underground and there’s usually something scurrying about. Now it was silent, save for the occasional drip of water. I began to wonder if the rats knew something we didn’t.

  Luckily for us, James was around to entertain us with a ghost story as we continued walking along the exceedingly spooky tunnel.

  “We were not always the civilized beings you know us as.”

  “Civilized?” my roommates and I rang out in unison.

  “Comparatively speaking, of course,” James added with a chuckle that held no humor.

  “So this Ib, is he the guy we’re looking for?”

  “Of course not,” he replied dismissively. “I have no idea who our quarry is yet and nothing to go on but his actions - which are potentially disturbing enough. Ib, however, is a myth.”

  “So, what, he’s like some sort of god or demon?” Tom asked.

  “Hardly. According to some of our legends, Ib was the original vampire - the first of us to walk this Earth.”

  ♦ ♦ ♦

  I couldn’t help but feel underwhelmed by his revelation. I mean, what the fuck kind of name was Ib? Dracula, now that’s kind of cool. In Marvel Comics, it was some dude named Varnae - not exactly soul-searingly terrifying, but still not too bad. But Ib? That sounded like something an online gamer might name their pet Iguana.

  “So what was this Ib like?”

  “I honestly have no idea. As I said, I believe the tale to be myth or allegory. All cultures have beliefs about creation. Why should ours be any different? The progenitor of our species is unimportant, though. What matters are his zealots and the atrocities they committed in his name.”

  This was starting to get interesting, albeit disturbing at the same time. I was always fascinated to hear some of our ancient history - at least the shit that involved blood and guts. The political crap could put me to sleep faster than my college philosophy lectures. Considering his tone, though, I had the feeling James’s story wasn’t going to explore the finer details of robust metaphysical debate.

  “You are well aware of our current social hierarchy. The coven system has been in place for mill
ennia. It is structured, orderly, and has allowed us to grow alongside humanity in a symbiotic manner. It may not always be fair, but it is logical in its...”

  “Watch out, Bill!”

  A hand fell upon my shoulder and dragged me to the left, causing me to stumble.

  “What the fuck, man?” I turned to glare at Tom.

  “You almost stepped on the third rail.” He shined the beam of his flashlight ahead of me - not that I needed it to see.

  “Oh...thanks.”

  “Don’t mention it.”

  Vampire or not, that could have been a somewhat embarrassing fate. It was well known amongst city dwellers that those things delivered a shit-ton of voltage, enough to make me wish I was still being tazed in my dungeon cell. I made it a point to pay better attention to where I was walking.

  James continued talking on despite our mishap behind him. Fortunately, he was still just blathering on about covens and the First - explaining things as if I hadn’t been dragged kicking and screaming into the world of vampire politics.

  “...The Cult, though, couldn’t have been more at odds with our modern way of thinking. Their primary beliefs centered on mysticism and portents. The advancements of man held no interest for them.”

  “Hold on a second. So what about all that prophecy bullshit everyone’s been shoving down my throat? That sounds pretty mystic to me. Oh, and those blind psychics in the cave of heavy drugs weren’t exactly calling up this shit on their iPhones.”

  James stopped in his tracks and I nearly bumped into him. “You actually met the elder seers?”

  “Yeah. Alex took me on a field trip to see them. I told you earlier.”

  “Interesting,” he mused. “They and the prophecies are hold overs - the last remnants of the old ways. Magic is most obviously real, so we would be fools to ignore it entirely. However, for the most part, we do not let it govern our day-to-day lives. As for the seers, rumor has it their order is actually descended from the Cult.”

  “Oh?”

  “I have heard it said, although none have ever confirmed it to me, that the blinding ritual is only partially to attune their senses. Some say it was originally instituted as punishment, so that they would never forget their place in this world.”