The Tome of Bill Series: Books 5-8 (Goddamned Freaky Monsters, Half A Prayer, The Wicked Dead, The Last Coven)

by Rick Gualtieri

  He stepped around it and addressed the crowd. “I believe we have heard enough, but it is tradition that the First be just and merciful before casting judgment.”

  A snort of laughter escaped my closed lips. I couldn’t help myself - probably the hunger shorting out my common sense. Tom found it amusing, but he seemed to be my lone supporter in that. I half expected to be pummeled into silence, but Alex ignored me, as if expecting no better.

  “I hereby suspend the protocols of rank set forth by this body. Any who wish to speak out, either for or against the Icon, may do so now without fear of reprisal.”

  He barely waited a beat before opening his mouth again, smugly sure that whatever his declaration, nobody, especially the vampires in the room, were insane enough to say shit against him.

  In that he was wrong, for just then, a small voice spoke out from the back of the auditorium.

  “You are a fool, Alexander.”

  The Chinese Connection

  The voice had a disturbingly familiar youthful cadence to it that belied the underlying confidence it carried forth. I only needed a single sentence to place it, but it was enough to make me wish I’d been executed up front.

  I couldn’t have spun faster had I been tazed in the ass. Ed was nearly as quick, his first meeting with the voice’s owner having left quite the impression.

  Gan stood on her chair at the far end of the auditorium to compensate for her diminutive size. That must have been how I’d missed her in my scans of the audience. When one was concentrating on all the big bad things in the room, it could be a fatal mistake to overlook the small worse things lurking about.

  She wasn’t alone either. Scattered throughout the crowd, vampires wearing traditional Mongolian assassin attire stood as she did. I didn’t know if she was expecting trouble, but she’d come prepared for it anyway - no matter how badly outnumbered her people might be.

  I will give her credit, though. Everything else I’d been feeling - hunger, despair, worry for my friends - it all shriveled up and receded deep inside of me, or maybe that was just my nutsack. Oh, crap. No matter which way you spun it, I couldn’t see any way that her presence here wouldn’t make our situation even worse.

  “Looks like your fiancée is here, Bill,” Tom said, stepping up alongside me. Oh, how I could have killed him for that remark alone. “Hey, why isn’t she down here with...”

  “Shut up,” I hissed, elbowing him in the ribs - probably harder than warranted.

  He had a point, though. Gan had been instrumental in our surviving Remington’s team. Hell, she’d even been the one who’d personally dispatched Harry Decker. She likewise had ordered Christy’s former coven to be hunted down and disposed of - succeeding nearly to the last witch.

  She’d obviously done a better job of covering her tracks than we had. The only ones who knew of her involvement were us, Sally, and the witch from earlier. Sally was brain-fucked right now, and the witch had conveniently taken an unexpected smoke break. So that left those of us standing around as prisoners, and I sure as shit wasn’t ratting her out. Rationally, that made sense. After all, having a powerful ally on the outside could be helpful. In reality, I just didn’t want her down here, pawing at me like some crazed miniature octopus.

  All of this introspection took place within seconds. A good chunk of the crowd seemed to be doing likewise - craning their necks to see who had enough of a death-wish to challenge the First. The funny thing was, they were right to think that. Gan had confided in me her two ultimate ambitions: marrying me and bumping off the Draculas. Considering the first one, I found myself wondering if it was too late to throw myself on the mercy of the court.

  “Gansetseg,” Alex began, seemingly unperturbed by her insolence, “Prefect of the Manchurian Steppe and daughter of the Khan, our late lamented brother. You are acknowledged. I believe you were telling the assembled what a fool I was.”

  Yeah, this was definitely going to be interesting.

  ♦ ♦ ♦

  “Indeed,” Gan replied. “You yourself lowered protocol. If you wish to reinstate it, I shall begin again in a more formal manner.”

  “Unnecessary,” Alex countered. “I believe your prefecture recently reported a significant victory in the Altai Mountains over a combined army of the Grendel and the Children of Erlik. Is that not so?”

  “So it was. The heads of the alma adorn pikes leading out a full kilometer from my ger-tereg.”

  “My compliments, Prefect. I believe the First would be happy to indulge you in whatever you feel you need to add to these proceedings.”

  I had no idea what any of that meant, other than reinforcing that Gan was batshit crazy. Regardless, she apparently had the résumé to back up her words.

  “Thank you, Lord Alexander,” she replied in a respectful tone that I was pretty sure wasn’t. “Likewise, my compliments to the glorious First Coven. My father was humbled to be among your number. One day, I hope to honor his memory by ascending to your ranks.”

  A loud, derisive sound interrupted from just to the left of where the First sat.

  “Did you have something to add, François?” I couldn’t help but notice Alex conveniently forgot to add his title to the question.

  “Sorry, my lord,” François replied with barely concealed contempt. “I was just clearing my throat.”

  “Then kindly do so quietly. You do not have the floor.” The tone of Alex’s voice implied he probably wouldn’t ever have it either. “Continue, Gansetseg.”

  Gan nodded to him, a neutral smile upon her face. It turned to something a lot less neutral for a moment when she looked down and locked eyes with me. Oh shit. I quickly eyed the guards at our periphery - the ones who’d brought Sheila in. With any luck, I could leap onto their drawn weapons and turn to dust before anyone noticed.

  A hand fell on my shoulder and I nearly jumped out of my skin.

  “Relax,” Sheila said softly, repressing her faith power so as to not fry me. “You look like you’re about to have a heart attack.”

  I almost had to laugh. Of all of us, she was in the most danger, yet she was offering me some comfort. For just a moment, I looked into her magnificent eyes and it was like the world ceased to exist. Then Gan started talking.

  “It saddens me to see how far we have strayed from the path laid down for us by the elder seers,” she said, throwing me a wink. Gah! “Have not their prophecies guided us through the ages?”

  “So they have, but their time wanes. The seers, honored though they may be, have brought us this far, but they can see no further. The mists of the future are obscured to them in these regards. The time for strategy and guile is upon us. Considering your ancestry, I would think you would draw the same conclusions.”

  Ooh, nice dig by Alexander.

  “Nonsense,” Gan replied dismissively. “My grandfather, the great Temüjin, carried his mystics with him through all his journeys. He continually mixed their insight with his own strategic genius. That is why his empire eventually became greater than that of any other conqueror before or since.”

  Whoa, even bigger smack in the face by Gan. Not only was that a burn, but she poured salt in the wound too.

  “Regardless,” she continued, “the outcome foreseen by the seers may be uncertain, but the steps leading up to it are not. The Shining One shall stand as the cattle’s last shepherd...”

  “Cattle?” a voice behind me asked.

  “I think she means people,” I whispered back to Sheila.

  “...in the final days of the war, my beloved...”

  “Will you knock it off already?!” Did I say that out loud? Oh, how I do love losing my shit and then finding dozens of unfriendly eyeballs turning my way.

  Tom and Ed tried, unsuccessfully, to repress snickers - pair of cocks. Christy and Sheila at least seemed to offer me some sympathy in their glances.

  “Freewill,” Alex said, his voice stern, “know that I will give you even less quarter for
interruption than our guests. My offer for input does not extend to you or your cohorts.”

  “Um, sorry.”

  “It is good to see you too, beloved,” Gan said, completely ignoring what I just screamed. Oh God, she was infuriating.

  “Can you please clarify your previous statement for the benefit of the assembled?” Alex asked.

  For a moment, Gan looked perplexed. Apparently, in her mind, the word “beloved” had been officially substituted for “Freewill” in the prophecies she was quoting. What a complete nutball. “My apologies. In the final days of the war, the Shining One shall meet the Freewill upon the battlefield. Their actions shall determine the course the world will take.”

  “I believe most of us are aware of that. Your point?”

  “And yet most chose to foolishly believe the Icon dead when even a simpleton could have predicted her survival. Even the First themselves seemed to put stock in this folly.”

  That sent up a murmur of discussion amongst the crowd.

  “Know that my indulgence is limited,” Alex replied coldly. “I would urge caution, child.”

  Gan bristled visibly at the remark, but managed to keep her composure. “It was not my intention to offend, great Alexander. Yet the fact remains it came to pass. For centuries, we have waited. Finally, when Dr. Death was revealed to us, that long wait was justified. Yet now, we casually brush aside that wisdom because of something so base as fear?”

  “What would you have us do?”

  “My own mystics have been studying the portents. The time of this final confrontation is rapidly approaching, but it is not upon us yet. The Freewill and the Shining One should be allowed to forge their own paths, knowing that whatever roads they take will eventually lead them back to one another.”

  This was interesting, although I had a feeling it was a pointless argument. It was like putting someone on trial for murder, having them dead to rights, but then acquitting them based on the word of some psychic. Of course, that was in the normal world. Here, where creatures could burst into flame, fly, or poof out of existence with just a thought, things were a bit different.

  Even so, the person in charge - the judge, jury, and probably executioner - was firmly in the camp of believing such things were bullshit. I tended to agree with Alex, knowing that it had been his personal interference, not fate, that had sparked the current war. If anything, Alex was using the prophecies not as a guiding hand, but as a way to further his own agenda.

  A small breeze fluttered against my skin. It would have otherwise been unnoticeable except for the still air of the room. As Gan and Alex continued to argue metaphysics versus real world, I glanced over and noticed the blast door opening. Maybe some new dignitaries had arrived, or better yet, maybe it was time to adjourn for the day. Hopefully, it was a dinner break - one in which they actually fed their fucking prisoners some goddamned dinner.

  “You would have us release the great enemy of our people? How many more must fall by her hand to satisfy your mystics?”

  “As many as are fated,” Gan replied coldly. Damn, she was the queen of the evil munchkins.

  “She may have a point...”

  “Not now, Theodora,” Alex said dismissively. “Perhaps, instead, a compromise. The Freewill and Icon are both here in front of us. Why not make them fight to the death right this moment?”

  “The time is not right, and I think we are all aware of it,” Gan replied.

  Judging by the continued discussion in the crowd, she wasn’t being dismissed out of hand. Vampires couldn’t harness the power of faith like humans, but many still needed something to believe in. Take away that belief and the results could be catastrophic. What Alex proposed was the vampire equivalent of the pope gathering the masses in the Vatican to announce he was jump-starting Armageddon to prove there was no God. Shit would undoubtedly get real at that juncture.

  “What would the outcome serve, other than for our amusement?” she asked. “Would the Shining One’s victory save humanity? Would Dr. Death’s assure darkness? No. I say fate has decreed that the Icon and my beloved shall meet when...”

  “NO!!”

  All eyes immediately turned to the source of the compulsion. There wasn’t a lot of firepower behind it, but it didn’t need much to get the point across. Even a relatively weak vampire could use one as the equivalent of a psychic bullhorn.

  I stood on tiptoes to see Farley standing in the now open portal that led out of here. What the fuck?

  “What are you...” Alex started, as if speaking to a stupid child.

  “No more!” Farley shouted out as the rest of his group took up positions on either side of the opening. “You have all followed the false Freewill for too long. I say he is nothing, an abomination to all we should hold dear. Drop to your knees and give praise to Vehron, the true Freewill of legend!”

  O-kay. I hadn’t pegged Farley as either this crazy or stupid. Besides, hadn’t he and the others been mind-scrubbed?

  “ENOUGH!!” Alex commanded. “YOU WILL CEASE YOUR INSOLENCE THIS INSTANT!! APPROACH SO I MAY DECIDE YOUR PUNISHMENT!!”

  The compulsion rang out like thunder in the enclosed space. The entire room seemed to rumble with the power of it. Great, that’s all we needed now - to be buried alive under tons of rubble because Alex lost his temper.

  Still, as badly screwed as Sheila and I might be, Farley was completely fucked because...

  Except he wasn’t.

  He stood his ground, looking as surprised as everyone else for a moment, but then he started to laugh. “Behold the impotence of your so-called leaders and know that the time of the First has ended.”

  As confusion took hold of the crowd, most of them stunned that Alex’s compulsion had, impossibly enough, failed, shapes beyond Farley converged upon his location.

  The blast doors that shielded this place were massive - built to withstand a nuclear attack. But open to the outside, they would offer us no protection against the horror about to descend upon us.

  Farley glanced over his shoulder and turned back smiling - his fangs gleaming white, a stark contrast to the dark sea of living rock behind him.

  “All hail Vehron! All hail Ib!”

  Demilitarized Zone

  “What the hell are those?” Sheila asked as the first of the invaders reached the door.

  By then, it was too late to stop their advance. A couple of the creatures threw themselves into the massive hinges, acting as living doorstops. Any chance we had of sealing ourselves in against the onslaught was immediately lost.

  “It’s the Jahabich,” I managed to say through my shock.

  “What are...”

  Whatever answer I may have had was immediately drowned out in the chaos. Dozens, maybe hundreds, of the rock monsters swarmed inside - cutting down the first few measures of resistance they met.

  They separated into three columns as they advanced. Two branched out into the crowd on either side, while a third group charged straight forward.

  The forces guarding us were slow to respond. Over a dozen were turned to dust in those first few seconds alone, their backs still to the threat.

  It was only then I realized the foolishness on display. They’d been compelled to keep their eyes on us, believing us to be the primary threat. Even now, as the heavy club-arms of the Jahabich crushed the skulls of their comrades, they were finding it hard to break free of their orders and defend the room. Such was the arrogance of the First.

  They’d undoubtedly thought no one would dare to attack them in one of their many strongholds. They’d assumed themselves safe from the Feet. They’d been right in that regard, but in doing so had completely underestimated another enemy - one apparently far more powerful than any of us would have guessed.

  “Let’s go!” I cried. If my friends and I continued standing where we were, they’d mow us down. We needed to get to the far side of the room and figure out how to get the fuck out of this death trap.

&n
bsp; I pushed Tom toward Christy. I’m sure he figured it was so he could watch out for her, although it was more the other way around. Ed, no dummy, followed them.

  I grabbed Sheila’s arm to pull her along, risking a third degree burn if she misunderstood my actions. She took a step, then stumbled. Fuck! I’d forgotten her legs were shackled too. She’d no more be able to run than perform a Karate Kid crane kick.

  “Sorry about this...please don’t kill me.” I bent down, put my arm around her midsection, and hauled her onto my shoulder - momentarily enjoying the sensation of grabbing her around the ass. Hey, when faced with certain death, one needs to take stock of the finer things in life.

  Oof! She was heavier than she looked. Wait...no, that wasn’t right. I was actually weaker than I should have been. I hadn’t realized it standing there while the legion of assholes judged me, but I was apparently running on a fraction of my normal strength thanks to my prolonged unplanned fast. Talk about irony. In the midst of a full-on ambush, I was actually feeling like my old, non-vampire self.

  Oh well, this was no time to cry over spilled milk

  “Whatever you do, do not flare up!” I shouted, then took off after my friends, trying to weave my way past the guards, who were finally starting to realize there was a greater enemy in the room.

  “STAND YOUR GROUND AND FIGHT!!”

  The command immediately knocked me right back to nearly where I’d started, almost causing me to drop Sheila in the process. Fucking compulsions!

  At least Alex was now in the game. Strangely, I found that somewhat comforting. The asshole had been trying to fuck me over since day one, but let’s be realistic - having one of history’s greatest generals on your side against an invading army was not a prospect one refused.

  “You really want to keep moving,” Sheila cried out from her vantage point, facing our rear.

  Trust is important in relationships on a lot of different levels, not the least of which is when a loved one says, “Duck!” you do it without asking.