by Sarah Bailey
“How do you think he’d feel if I dropped off the face of the planet on my birthday? He’s my best friend.”
“That boy has always been infatuated with you.”
She almost choked on her own breath. Jax wasn’t infatuated with her. They cared about each other, but it had only ever been as friends. And he had Sam. They were happy, even if Sam didn’t like her very much. Jax would never throw away their friendship over a girl.
“No, he’s not.”
“I’m going to have strong words with his mother.”
“Dad, no. He made a mistake. He knows that.”
Her father walked around the desk and sat back in his chair, taking the teacup and sipping at his tea. She slumped in the chair in front of the desk, looking at him with a tense expression.
“Why did you not return straight away?”
“I couldn’t. When I got there, I discovered no one was allowed to leave. All the portals and the gates had been sealed. I’ve spent the past two months trying to get around that, but it was only when I accidentally summoned Jax that we were finally able to return home. I got back last night, so I came as soon as I could. I promise, Dad, I didn’t do this to get out of anything. I know my duty.”
“You summoned Jax to Hell? How did you stay alive down there?”
She stifled a sigh. How would she explain where exactly she’d been? She didn’t need her father finding out about her and Lucifer.
“You know I can’t do portal magic. It wasn’t on purpose. And I stayed alive because I’m resourceful, besides, they appreciated my help in fixing what God did.”
“What?”
“God sealed them in Hell, at least that’s what Lu… I was told.”
Her father’s eyebrows drew together in a frown.
“Does it matter what happened? I’m back now and in time for my birthday.”
“I’m still not happy with that boy for sending you there in the first place, but it’s not a matter you need to concern yourself with. Your mother knows you’ve been missing.”
It was the last thing she wanted to hear. Her mother was the reason her life wasn’t her own. She picked up her teacup, taking a huge gulp before setting it back down.
“Why did you tell her?”
“How was I to know you’d return home before your birthday? I will speak to her. Preparations have been made in your absence. The ball will be held and you will go.”
His expression told her everything. He was disappointed in her yet again. None of this had been her fault, but that never seemed to matter to him.
“I know, Dad. You don’t have to look at me like that.”
“And just how do you think I’m looking at you?”
This was a dangerous line of conversation. They’d argued over this so many times, she’d lost count. It always came back to the same thing. He’d never once told her he was proud of her nor made her feel like she was adequate.
“I can’t do anything right in your eyes.” She stood abruptly. “I’ve done everything you asked. I’m even giving up my life because of you and her, but that’s not good enough for you. Do you think I want this? Chained in servitude for the rest of my existence. It’s not my fault you had a secret affair with her nor that I was the product of it. Do you know what it’s like to be scorned by both witches and fae just because I’m a half blood? No, because no one would dare say a bad word to the leader of the Grand Coven about his daughter.”
The words tumbled out in a rush. After everything she’d been through in the last two months, her ability to keep her mouth shut was shot to pieces. She’d been fine with all of it until she’d met Lucifer. Met him, fought with him, had mind-blowing sex with him and worst of all, fallen in love with him. Now, it all made her angry.
She paced away, clenching her fists.
“Candace, do you really believe that?”
“What else am I supposed to believe when all you do is tell me how much I’ve disappointed you? I know when you look at me you see her.”
The seconds of silence ticked by. Her heart was already shattered. It broke the moment she left Hell. What did it matter if her father never gave her the love she desperately craved from him? She’d learnt long ago there was no use arguing with Gallian Highmore. No use pleading with him.
“I’m going back to London. I only came to tell you I’m home.”
“Candace…”
“Don’t, Dad. There’s nothing to say.”
She walked out of his office, tears threatening to spill down her cheeks. There was only one thing she wanted to do. Drown herself in booze and not think for a while. Not remember Lucifer’s hands on her or his mesmerising dark eyes. Nor think about her conversation with her father or her fate. All of it broke her heart further.
She didn’t want to go to ObliVion and run into her mother’s lackey who always seemed to take up permanent residence there. No, she’d go somewhere else away from humans. Away from witches. There was only one place they rarely ventured where she could drown her sorrows and it wouldn’t get back to her father.
Fright Night.
Chapter Fourteen
Darkness had fallen by the time she arrived back in London and made her way to Soho. Trudging down the steps into the basement bar, she didn’t bother checking her coat. She sat down on one of the bar stools and eyed the bartender who was serving someone else. It wasn’t particularly busy this early, but she was glad of that.
“You look like shit. Bad day?”
She glanced up. Neave was leaning against the bar, grinning.
“Bad everything,” she replied rolling her eyes. “Just give me something strong.”
She’d been in the bar quite often and had gotten to know the vampire who owned it. She didn’t much mind them, unlike her witch counterparts. It was a centuries old hatred which she thought was idiotic.
Neave moved away for a moment, selecting an expensive bottle of scotch.
“Is this the type of thing you’re looking for?” the vampire asked.
“Sure.”
The cost didn’t bother her. It was her father’s money. What did she care how much she spent of it? Especially after today. Neave poured some into a whisky tumbler and slid it across to her. She took a sip, grimacing a little. It was strong and burnt on the way down.
“I’ll just leave the bottle here. I know you’re good for it.”
The vampire smiled before walking away to serve another customer. Pulling out her phone, she fired off a quick text to Jax.
‘Just a warning… Dad’s pissed at you.’
A few moments later, a reply came.
‘Where are you?’
‘Drinking myself into an early grave.’
‘That bad?’
‘Worse, but don’t worry about it. I’ll deal.’
‘We need to talk about what happened in Hell.’
She stared down at her phone. There was no way she was having that conversation with Jax. She tucked it back in her bag. He could just wait.
Taking another sip of scotch, she sighed. Drinking alone. This was a new low, even for her. She usually did this with Jax, but she knew he needed to spend time with Sam and she didn’t particularly want to have it out with him about Lucifer.
Why the fuck am I thinking about him again?
The pain in her chest was unbearable.
Picking up the tumbler, she downed the rest of it. Her father would scold her for drinking a single malt in such a way, but she didn’t give a shit right then. She poured herself some more and sipped at it.
“Didn’t expect to see you in here,” came a voice she recognised.
She looked over at the dark-haired witch who took a seat next to her.
“I could say the same of you.”
Alistair grinned, tipping an imaginary hat at her.
They’d known each other a long time.
Alistair had always been a bit of a lady’s man. His conquests included Candace herself. One drunken night not long after she’d moved to L
ondon, she’d been out clubbing with him and Jax. One thing led to another and she’d ended up back at his. Both of them agreed never to mention it again. It was one of the few things she swore she’d never tell Jax about.
She was glad he’d finally settled down with someone. Although, she knew very well his mother completely disapproved of his choice. She’d been there the day the Grand Coven had sentenced Ophelia. Stripped of your magic and permanently frozen in time was not a fate she wished on anyone.
“How’s Grace?” she asked.
“Oh, she’s fine. Still refusing to entertain the idea of marriage, but I’m sure she’ll come around in her own time.”
She chuckled, indicating to Neave to get them another tumbler. The vampire picked up a glass and slid it down the bar. Candace caught it and poured a scotch for Alistair.
“You know it’s funny seeing you all smitten with a girl.”
“Jealous, are we? You had your chance.”
He gave her a wink, taking a sip of whisky.
“And now I suddenly remember why I never wanted a repeat of that incident.”
He knocked his shoulder into hers.
“Say, why are you here alone instead of with Jax?”
She should’ve known he’d ask about that.
“I need to talk to you about something. This has to stay between us.”
She turned to him, her expression serious. He raised an eyebrow but nodded.
“Did Jax ask you how to create a portal to Hell and did you help him with it?”
He looked down at his drink for a moment before sighing and running a hand through his hair.
“He asked me some questions, but I don’t know why he wanted to know. What’s this about?”
“He sent me to Hell and I couldn’t get back for two months. Don’t worry, I’m fine, but my dad is pissed off for obvious reasons. And I really don’t want you getting in the crosshairs for being inadvertently involved.”
She took another sip of whisky. Warning him felt like the right thing to do.
“I’m going to chuck that idiot in the Thames. Wait, so the rumours were true? Hell was really sealed off? Shit. I mean after all that crap with the Darkness last year, I thought things had been too quiet on that front.”
“The Darkness?”
“Oh well, yeah. You must’ve been in Oxford when it happened. It was the end-of-the-world shit involving pretty much all of us. It was crazy. I’ve never seen so many angels and who’d have thought I’d actually get to see the Devil up close.”
Her heart thumped in her chest at the mention of his name. Was this what he’d been talking about the day they’d met?
“Lucifer?”
He eyed her for a moment, frowning a little.
“Yes. I didn’t speak to him, but he got into this huge fight with Azrael, you know, the Archangel of Death and then Michael turned up with Gabriel and Raphael. Also, in some crazy twist, Michael is actually Lukas’ father. So, Azrael had to kill his own girlfriend to stop the Darkness, but it’s all good. God brought her back to life and they live up in Heaven now.”
She stared at Alistair with wide eyes. What the actual fuck? She tried to process everything he’d told her.
“What exactly was the Darkness?”
“God’s wrath, though really, it was his punishment for Azrael siding with Lucifer in the war in Heaven on top of his exile. I’m just glad that’s all over. I mean, if the world had ended, it would’ve sucked.”
Her heart wrenched again.
Lucifer. It can’t be easy for him knowing he’s still exiled when his fellow angel had been allowed to go home.
All she wanted to do was wrap her arms around him. Tell him it was okay and she was here for him now. She couldn’t do any of those things. He was in Hell and she was back on Earth where she belonged.
“Shit. Can’t believe I knew nothing about this.”
“Say, why are you so interested in it anyway?”
“Oh, it’s just something he said when I was in Hell.”
She slapped a hand over her mouth. It had slipped out without her realising.
“Who said?”
Alistair had always been discerning even if he was constantly making crude jokes and talking about himself like he was the best thing since sliced bread. He was smart, powerful and she always went to him when she needed help with magic. They were pretty close friends.
“Lucifer,” she mumbled.
“You actually talked to him?”
“I spent two months with him, Alistair.”
He grinned and winked at her.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, not like that.”
It had been like that. She turned away, her face burning.
Damn it and now he’s not going to drop it either. Shit. Why did I have to open my stupid mouth?
“You’ve gone up in my estimation.”
Her head whipped around.
“What?”
“Was it good? I mean I can imagine he’s into some weird shit.”
Trust him to say something like that.
“Oh god, please stop talking.”
“Who’s into weird shit?” Neave asked.
Candace jumped, looking up at the vampire who was leaning on the bar in front of them.
“Candace did the dirty with the Devil when she was in Hell.”
“Alistair!”
Neave’s eyebrows shot up.
“Damn, he’s hot. I don’t blame you for getting a piece of that.”
She folded her arms across her chest.
“I did not sleep with Lucifer.”
“Says the girl who’s on first name terms with him,” Alistair said, grinning.
She was going to kill him in a minute. Why did he have to tell Neave? No one was supposed to know.
“Look, if I find out either of you has blabbed this to anyone else, I will hunt you down. Got it?” She looked between the two of them. They both nodded. “Yes, it was amazing. Now, kindly drop this subject before I bash your heads together.”
“I need details,” Neave said. “You fucked the Devil. If he batted his eyes at me, I’d come running.”
She bit the side of her mouth.
I’m not jealous. Not at all. Not one bit. Who the fuck am I kidding? I can’t stand the thought of him with anyone else.
She couldn’t expect him to be faithful to her. It wasn’t like they were in a relationship and she’d left him. Her heart contracted for what felt like the hundredth time that day. She had to stop thinking about him.
“Neave, with all due respect, fuck off.”
The vampire smiled wide, shrugged and walked away, hips swaying. Alistair turned to her.
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay, it’s just complicated. Don’t say anything to Jax. He doesn’t know.”
“So, this is another thing to go in the ‘we’ll never speak of this incident again’ tank?”
She took another sip of whisky, twirling the tumbler around in her hand.
“It’s just really fucked up.”
“When is your life ever not fucked up?”
Yeah, well, that drunken incident between us also involved spilling all our secrets to each other.
She knew about his grandmother and her visions. How he was meant to be leader of his aunt’s coven. And he knew what would happen on her birthday.
“Touché.”
“Come on, Candace, if you want to talk about it, you know I won’t give you any shit for it.”
She threw back the second tumbler of whisky and poured another for both of them. The alcohol numbed her senses. What if she confided the truth? Would she feel better having it out in the open?
“Will you give me shit for it if I tell you I accidentally fell in love with the Devil when I’ve got two more weeks before my life pretty much ends?”
He knocked back his own glass, pouring another one.
“Fuck. Does he know?”
“Are you crazy? No. It was never meant to happen. None of it.
Why do you think I’m in a bar drowning my sorrows by myself?”
He put a hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze.
“You can drink with me.”
“Don’t you have a girlfriend to go home to? Why are you in here anyway?”
He shrugged.
“Gavin wants something, but as you can see, he’s not here yet.”
She rolled her eyes. When were vampires ever on time?
“Getting dragged into vamp shit again? Lucky you. I thought you disliked them.”
“Looks like it. I did, but after you go through the end of the world with them, kind of hard to keep being all ‘I hate you so much’, you know.”
She grinned.
Well, I wouldn’t know, but I can imagine.
She didn’t much mind vampires. Neave was an all right sort and she’d met Gavin on a handful of occasions. It was hard not to run into the man who ran London when you hung out in the bar owned by his second in command.
“How’s your goddaughter?”
He dug out his phone, scrolling through and showing her photos. Him and Luna in the park with Grace. Him making stupid faces at Luna. Grace showing Luna a picture book.
“You two will make awesome parents one day.”
“Don’t tell Aunty Grace that. She’ll have another fit and say it’s too soon. Luna stays with us during the full moon so Izz and Rex don’t worry about her.”
She smiled at him, reminded again how glad she was he’d found someone to settle down with. It also made her sad. Her life was such a mess. She downed another whisky, feeling the burn again on the way down. If only she could stop thinking about the Devil for one minute, things might be easier. She knew she’d have no such luck.
I miss him already. I want him so much it hurts. I’m an idiot. A huge fucking idiot.
How was she going to deal with being away from him when all her heart wanted was Lucifer? She wanted to see his mesmerising eyes staring down at her and that deliciously wicked smile of his. It’d barely been twenty-four hours. This was a nightmare. One she needed to end.
“I need to get so drunk I can’t remember my name any more,” she said.
Alistair poured her another whisky, clinking his glass against hers.
“Bottoms up then.”