Cruel Obsession

by Beck, J. L.

  A hiss of pleasure escapes my lips. I want to be inside her so badly. I don’t care where or how. Mouth, pussy, ass… Doesn’t matter because eventually, I’ll claim all of her. For now, however, only one will do. Anything but my fucking hand.

  Pumping my cock harder, I think about how warm and wet her pussy will be. How tight she’ll be squeezing my dick when I take her virginity. How slow I’ll take her, savoring every inch that I gain inside her.

  I thrust into my hand, tightening my grip as picture after picture of the things I want to do to Dove play behind my eyes like a movie. My balls tighten, and the pleasure builds. Just when I’m about to blow a fat load onto the shower tiles, I get this weird feeling. The feeling of someone watching me. I still my hand with my cock heavy in it. My eyes flutter open and connect with a pair of big blues.

  I don’t know who is more shocked, her, or me. She didn’t just walk in here by accident, see me and walk back out. No, she is standing in the middle of the bathroom, watching me jerk off. She walked in here, knowing I was taking a shower.

  Her mouth hangs open, and her eyes are so impossibly wide, I think it must hurt to put so much strain on them. It looks like she’s about to say something, her lips moving slightly, but no words come out.

  I would give anything to know what’s going on inside her pretty little head right now. There’s only a second for me to make my decision, a second before she turns and walks away.

  A good man would tell her to get out, to go into the bedroom and wait, but after this morning, and all these years of being so close but yet so far away, I’m just not strong enough to. I want her, in whatever way she’ll let me have her.

  Opening the glass door, steam billows out. “I see you watching me. Take your clothes off and come in here.”

  Fear briefly flashes over her face, but something else emerges beneath. Curiosity? Need? Want? Even if she is afraid, this other emotion must win out because she reaches for the hem of her shirt.

  Her movements are slow and jerky, almost unsure as she shoves her pants down and then pulls her shirt off. She stands there before me in plain panties and a bra, and I’m so wound up I could explode at the image. Perfection.

  “Don’t be shy. I’ve already seen you naked.” I say as she hesitates, her fingers dipping into the sides of her panties. I can see her mind working, fighting with herself. Arguing about what she wants and what she thinks is right.

  Maybe she won’t do it? Maybe she’ll turn around and run out of the bathroom? It would be the smart thing to do. The right thing.

  Her eyes stay trained to my face as she shocks the hell out of me by slowly dragging her panties down her legs before kicking them away once they reach her feet.

  Next is her bra, and it takes everything inside of me not to look down at that valley between her thighs. I’ve dreamed about this moment. Fucked my hand so many times to the image, it should be illegal. Hell, if she knew how often I’ve fucked her in my mind, she would be terrified.

  “I…” Her cheeks turn fifty shades of pink as she slowly walks into the shower. “This is… I don’t know why I’m doing this. I don’t know you. You kidnapped me. You drugged me, but...” She shakes her head almost as if she too doesn’t believe it.

  Shame overtakes her features and I close the door before crossing the space that separates us. I can’t allow her to feel this way. To question this. We were made for each other. We’re two different sides of a fractured soul.

  “You’re doing it because you know deep down, I’m not the monster you’re making me out to be. Yes, I brought you here against your will, but have I hurt you?”

  “No,” she answers nervously.

  “And I won’t. No matter what happens or what you do, I won’t hurt you. I just want to make you feel good. Do you want that? Do you want me to touch you?” Her throat bobs, and her teeth sink into her bottom lip. I won’t touch her, no matter how badly my fingers itch to unless she says yes.

  “I’ve never been naked with a man or touched a...” Her naiveté only makes her more attractive as she refuses to say the word out loud.

  Leaning into her body, I watch with pleasure as she shivers, tiny goosebumps pebbling her flesh. I want to taste her, suck on her tender skin, mark her. Make her mine. Forever.

  “Did you forget that I know everything there is to know about you? I know that you’re a virgin, that you’ve never let a man touch you, let alone fuck you.”

  Her chest rises and falls, drawing my attention to her perky breasts.

  “Will you touch me?”

  “Only if you want me to,” I say hoarsely, running my fingers underneath the swell of her breast. “Is that what you want? For me to touch you?”

  Her voice is so soft I almost don’t hear her response. “Yes.”

  Forcing myself to breathe slowly, I lean into her and touch my lips to hers. I kiss her lazily, drawing out each caress until she’s lifting her hands and placing them against my chest. Tiny nails sink into my flesh, and I knead one breast before switching to the other.

  We’re both panting now, and my balls ache so badly I feel like I’m going to blow at any second. I need a release, and soon.

  “I want to touch you.” My lips move across her jaw and down her throat. My kisses grow hungrier as I reach her throbbing pulse.

  “You are…” She says innocently.

  Easing back, I chuckle. “No, I mean, here…” I trail my hand down to her abdomen and run my finger over the top of her mound.

  “I don’t want to have sex,” she blurts out as if we were going there right now. “I’m not ready for that.”

  “Not sex, sweetheart, just touching. Nothing else.”

  She looks like she might say no but then nods her head. I can tell she’s nervous, but she has nothing to be nervous about. I’ll make this good for her.

  “Spread your legs a little.” She immediately widens her stance, and my fingers move over her skin tenderly as if she’s a delicate flower. When I reach her folds, I slide a finger between them and smirk when I find her already wet for me.

  Looking down at her, she’s staring up at me with uncertainty.

  “Relax. I won’t hurt you, and if you want me to stop, I will.” Fluttering my finger against her clit, I watch as her facial features do a one-eighty. There’s something wild in her eyes, like a stallion that needs to be lassoed.

  “You’re so reactive to my touch… like you were made for me. Fuck, I want to be inside of you so bad.”

  “That feels…” She trails off like she can’t find the word.

  “Good?”

  “Yes, so good.” She tugs her bottom lip into her mouth, and I’m tempted to bite it just like she is, but instead, focus entirely on her pleasure. After rubbing gentle circles against her clit for a while, I move to her entrance, exhaling all the air in my lungs as I very slowly sink one digit inside of her. Heaven. Absolute fucking heaven is the only way I could describe this. Come leaks from the swollen head of my cock, and every muscle in my body tightens.

  Dove clenches around my finger, and I look up into her angelic face. She’s tensing up again, it’s most likely nerves; still, I have to make certain.

  “Am I hurting you?”

  “No… I want…you.” The urgency in her voice tells me she’s telling the truth, plus she’s drenched, soaking my fingers, she wants this.

  With her pussy in my hand, I watch her face intently as I slowly pump my finger in and out of her channel, maintaining pressure against her clit.

  And fuck, what I see as I watch her is what I always imagined it would be like when I touched her. Euphoric pleasure clouds her eyes. Her pupils dilate, and her mouth opens, forming a perfect O. She looks like a sex goddess.

  Her arousal coats my hand, and I know she’s close, so close. Curving my finger upward, I rub against the tissue at the top of her channel. At that very moment, I feel her fingers graze my cock before gripping it fully.

  Holy fucking shit. I’ve died and gone straight to heaven
. Gritting my teeth, I barely keep myself from flying off the edge with her small hand wrapped around my cock, she’s stroking me slowly, her inexperience showing but I don’t care.

  “Come for me, sweetheart, I can feel you fluttering, building up for release. I want to feel your tightness all around me, feel you let go. Come for me...” I whisper against her lips, plunging into her a little faster, my palm slapping against her clit.

  Little sex kitten noises spill from her mouth, and her nails drag across my chest, leaving behind red marks. The pain only heightens my pleasure. I’m desperate for a release, desperate to fill her with my fucking cock. But I’m beyond desperate to know what it feels like to have her fall apart. To feel her crumble in my hands.

  “I’m…” She starts but doesn’t finish as she slams head-first into pleasure. Her hand stops moving on my cock, and her body arches into mine as she pushes up onto her tiptoes just as her pussy starts clenching around my finger. I’m so fucking turned on, so fucking in need of release that I shatter right along with her. Lightning bolts of pleasure zing through me, heading straight into my aching balls, and like a teenager touching pussy for the first time, I come undone, ripping at the seams.

  Sticky ropes of semen erupt from the head of my cock and land against Dove’s thigh, marking her. Heat rips across my skin, my heart thundering in my chest, and all I can feel is her in my arms, falling apart, her pussy creaming against my hand.

  After a moment, I ease out of her and smile when my eyes catch on my release that’s dripping down her thigh. I’m tempted to tell her I don’t usually go off that easy but decide not to. She’s not experienced enough to care, and when the time for me to take her comes, I’ll make sure I give her the best fucking performance ever.

  “Thank you.” I press a soft kiss to the crown of her forehead, waiting for us both to catch our breath.

  She gives me a half-smile, her eyes heavy with post orgasm pleasure. “I didn’t do anything.”

  Shutting off the water, I turn back toward her. “Yes, you did. You trusted me enough to let me be a part of something special, so yes, you did do something.”

  She shrugs. “I didn’t, not really.”

  I help her dry off and then slip into a pair of grey sweatpants. She hurries into the closet and comes out wearing a nightgown. Her eyes are trained to the floor, almost like she’s afraid to look at me. Worry knots in my gut.

  She’s so quiet. I don’t know what I thought would happen afterward, but I didn’t think she would withdrawal so much. Maybe I did hurt her, and she just doesn’t want to tell me. I watched her face the entire time and felt her fall apart, but maybe I had misjudged something.

  I hate feeling this way when it comes to her and refuse to bite my tongue. I have to know if I did something…

  “Is everything okay?” I ask when we go to lie down for bed.

  She nods but doesn’t make eye contact with me. “Everything is fine. I just feel… weird, like I did something wrong. Like letting you touch me was bad.”

  “It wasn’t bad—” I start to explain but am cut off before I can finish.

  “Can we just go to bed? I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” Desperation coats each word, and though I want to push her to explain to me what’s going on in her head, there will be other times I can do that. I don’t want to fight and ruin the moment we shared, so I shut off the light and crawl into bed beside her. There is a foot of space between us, which seems strange now, after how close we were in the shower.

  “Goodnight, Dove,” I say.

  “Night,” she whispers back.

  It isn’t long before she falls asleep, her soft snores filling the quiet room. However, like all the nights of my life, I can’t sleep and instead stare at her, watching as she finds blissful sleep.

  17

  The days start to blend together. Time isn’t a variable when there is no clock or sunlight. Each day the walls seem to close in on me a little bit more. Sleeping, reading, and eating are what my life consists of now. At least Max isn’t bothered by the isolation. He’s still his purring self. I, on the other hand, have cabin fever.

  I do my best to stay away from Zane, but it’s a lot harder than you think. Shoved into a box, I’m forced to interact with only him, a man that has me completely baffled. Being here makes me feel lonely. There is no sun, no animals, minus Max, and nothing to do. I miss my normal, boring life more and more every day. I miss talking to people, conversation. I’m longing for that human contact you can only get outside these walls. I never realized how important that is to me, the connection to other people.

  I’m in a constant battle of trying to stay away from him and trying to seek him out. So far, my brain has won, and I’ve managed to keep my physical urges in check, but I know damn well that that’s not going to last much longer.

  Ever since that night in the shower, my body tingles all over whenever our eyes meet. Stupidly, I replay what we did over and over again in my mind. His thick finger entering me, owning me. The way I spiraled out of control. How he held me through the pleasure, finishing right along with me.

  Repeating to myself over and over again that he’s the enemy, would be easier if my body felt the same way I did. All this confusion does is give me a never-ending headache.

  I still don’t know why I went into the bathroom that day. It was like my mind shut down, and my body took over. I heard the shower running, and I swear I was just going to take a quick peek. Curiosity and all. I thought to myself, it would be only fair to watch him since he watched me for so long. But then I saw him jerking off in the shower, his hand wrapped around his cock. It was mesmerizing. Even after he saw me, I didn’t care. There were blocks of concrete tied to my feet, stopping me from going anywhere.

  Stupid. I was stupid for letting him touch me. Stupid for craving his touch. Paging through the book, I pretend to be reading while Max snuggles into my side.

  I’ve discovered another layer of the extensiveness that is Zane’s obsession with me. It’s like he knows everything, and I mean everything. It’s not simple things like your favorite color or food. It’s what I’m allergic to, the surgeries I’ve had, my work hours, and therapy schedule.

  He knows things that others would never notice. Like when I touch my scar…

  I try not to think about the other things he knows… like my time in foster care or that night. I feel a sliver of triumph because no matter how much he knows, he can’t know about that night. He might have read the police report, but he doesn’t know what really happened because I never told a soul.

  Every once in a while, he’ll share something about himself, but those moments are far, and few between and none of those things are of great significance. They’re mundane things, like how he loves Italian food but hates Chinese.

  I don’t ask him about working with the mob, mostly because I’m afraid of what he’ll tell me. Then again, it probably wouldn’t be a bad idea for me to think the worst of him. It would certainly make it easier for me to hate him.

  I still haven’t pieced the puzzle together on where I fit into things. I don’t know where and how his obsession with me began. All I know is Zane is determined to keep me here and protect me from whatever evil he feels is lurking in the outside world. Because of his kindness and the feelings he has for me, my hate and fear are becoming harder and harder to maintain.

  It’s impossible for me to make myself hate someone who refuses to hurt me. Yes, he’s my captor, but he doesn’t act like it. He treats me like a lover, he’s been waiting for his whole life. Like a rare piece of glass, I’m fragile to him. Beautiful. To be put on a shelf and gazed upon. I’m none of those things though. Or at least I don’t want to be.

  I’m hyper-aware of his presence, and I hate it. I hate that I’m drawn to him. That my nipples harden and my core burns when he’s near.

  Stupid, treacherous body.

  I tell myself it’s because I’ve never had a man’s attention on me before and maybe that’s it, or mayb
e it’s something else. Something I don’t want to admit to. The power he has over me is terrifying. It entices me. He hasn’t tried to touch me since the shower, but I know he wants to.

  His gaze lingers a little longer than it should, and yeah, he might be good at hiding his emotions, but he isn’t that good. The way he looks at me is how I imagine a starving man looks at a steak. Like he could devour it, consume it all in one single bite.

  That single thought gets the wheel in my head spinning. What if I use his obsession with me against him? He wants me, deep down, I can see it, and feel it, so what if I try to seduce him? Maybe that’s how…

  “Do you want to watch a movie with me?”

  A high-pitched squeal leaves my lips, and I jump about a foot off the chair. My movements cause the book in my lap to fall to the floor. “Jesus!” I press a hand to my chest to stop my heart from lurching out of it. “Maybe make some noise before you appear out of thin air.”

  Zane smirks, showing off two dimples. I feel my insides warming already. My hormones are out of control. He’s so handsome it hurts. His body’s cut from stone, his features dangerous, but alluring. If I’d seen him on the street, I wouldn’t just find him attractive. I’d find him salivating.

  “You need to become more aware of your surroundings. I’ve been standing here for five minutes now, just staring at you.”

  It makes sense now, how easily he watched me. He’s like a ghost, or ninja, or both. And apparently, I need to pay better attention. Maybe if I had, I wouldn’t be here right now.

  “So, is that a yes or no?”

  “Uhhh.” My face heats to the temperature of the sun. “Yes, sure.” I’ve been doing anything and everything I can to keep the distance between us.

  Maybe now is the time to try and implement my plan. I don’t know the first thing when it comes to seducing a man, but all I can do is try. It’s my only hope. Plus, Zane knows how inexperienced I am. It’s not like he’ll be able to notice something is up.

  Like a lost puppy, I follow him out and into the living room. I plop on the couch, letting the soft cushion and oversized pillows swallow me. Watching him put on the movie, I try to come up with a plan while also trying not to look too nervous.