by Kiki Harlow
“Can I call you?” I asked, almost dreading her answer.
She shook my head.
“I don’t think so,” she said, avoiding my eyes. “I’m overwhelmed. This is all too much for me. Kelly is right, I’m not… I’m not the one for you.”
“Don’t you think that I should decide that?” I asked.
“Nikolas… I just need some time to think, OK?”
Rowena put on her helmet and started up her bike.
“I’m sorry,” she mouthed.
I watched her speed away into the night, leaving me and STYX behind.
Chapter Nine
Rowena
God, they’re really going to town on each other, I thought as I watched the young couple on table four make out near the restaurant window.
Is that what we looked like? I felt a pang of longing.
I was sure that we were a lot worse. I blushed at the thought of all the things Nikolas and I did in the short time we were together. I did more living in those few hours than I had in years.
But being with him wasn’t for me. Sure, I felt alive with him, but I also felt out of my league, out of balance and unsure of myself. What Kelly said was true. It echoed every horrible thought that I already had in my head. Here, in this dirty old restaurant, it was comfortably awful. I knew my place here.
I wish… I wish I wasn’t such a coward. That I didn’t run away from things that I thought were too hard.
I wish I wasn’t so afraid of living. Maybe this awful, comfortable life was what a coward like me deserved.
“Get a room, am I right?” A customer sauntered to the counter. He smelled of cigarettes and beer and looked like he hadn’t had a shower in a week.
I gave him a half-hearted laugh. “Yeah.”
“No,” he said, glancing at my chest, a sleazy little smile spreading on his face. “I mean, you and me, we should get a room… what do you say?”
I glared at him.
“Sir, this is a pizzeria,” I said, dismissively. “The strip club is down the road.”
“Uppity bitch,” the man muttered.
“What did you say to me?” I snapped.
“I said you’re a real uppity BITCH!” He said the last word emphatically.
“Hey, what’s the matter?” Al said, entering the room from the kitchen. “You got a problem?”
“Yeah, I have a problem,” the man sneered. “This little bitch right here.”
The couple near the window turned to look at us.
“Yeah, well if you pay for your meal and leave, she won’t be your problem any longer!” Al said.
“Screw you buddy! I won’t be coming around again,” the man shouted. He slammed the money on the counter and walked to the front door. He turned around. “The food is shit too.”
The man slammed the door behind him.
“So’s your face pal!” Al yelled after him. “Your face is shit!”
Al looked at me with a shrug and a ‘what can you do?’ expression on his face.
Maybe Al wasn’t so bad after all.
Maybe my life wasn’t so bad. I could try to make it work.
“You should really be nicer, you know?” Al said, draping his hand over my shoulder. “No, just because they are customers. But you know, you’re not getting any younger. You need to meet a man.”
“I’m twenty-six.” I shrugged his arm off.
“That’s the wrong side of twenty-five, girl,” he grinned. “My mother had me at seventeen.”
“That’s really young,” I frowned.
“You know once there’s carpet on a girl’s...”
No, I was wrong. Al was awful. My life was horrible and I was sure as hell not going to let him finish that sentence.
“Stop,” I said.
“All I’m saying is maybe give guys like that a chance, who knows where it could lead!”
“I quit,” I blurted.
“What?”
“I quit,” I bit out. “Did I stutter or are you just fucking stupid?”
The years of holding it in came crashing down.
I was sick and tired. I was sick of being tired.
I can’t live like this anymore.
I won’t live like this anymore.
“I quit this place! I quit you! I quit feeling like shit every single day of my life!”
I knew there was better out there. Nikolas showed me that I could be happy. That I deserved more. I didn’t have to settle.
“You’re serious,” Al said. The caterpillars on his face jumped up and down.
I took my apron off and smacked it against Al’s chest.
“Serious as the heart disease people get coming here!”
I walked toward the front door.
“You really are an uppity bitch!” he yelled.
I turned back and laughed. “Maybe I am, but from now on I’m not your problem anymore!”
I ran outside. The sun warmed my face, and I felt free.
“I’m going to be okay, I said to myself out loud.
I’m smart and capable. I can get another job. I can make my life the way I want it to be.
And what I wanted right now was to see Nikolas again.
But first I wanted to wash the grease and misery of the last few years off in a long hot shower.
Chapter Ten
Nikolas
“A pleasure doing business with you.”
“I’m glad we could come to an agreement, Mark,” I said as I shook the older man’s hand.
“I know that we’ve had our differences in the past, but I promise you that her legacy is safe with me,” Mark said, placing his other hand on mine.
“I’m sure it will be,” I replied. I pushed my chair into my desk. “I’ll see you out?”
“No, I’ll be fine,” he said, shaking his head. He stood and made his way to the door. “I’ll get my lawyer to get in touch with yours.”
I followed him to the door and gave him a final wave as he walked down the stairs. I closed the door with a click.
I walked over to the desk, running my hands over the wood before sitting down on the leather chair.
It was done.
I had to go see her. I respected her wishes, and let her be, but now, everything was different.
Maybe now I could convince her that we weren’t such a bad idea after all.
A knock sounded at my door.
“Mark?” I called out. I glanced around the room to see if the man had left anything behind.
“Mark, I -” I opened the door. “Oh.”
Rowena stood at the door. She was dressed in a black slinky dress, her eyes darkly lined and her lips were plum-coloured. She looked so different.
She was here.
“Rowena,” I breathed. “I was coming to see you.”
“I beat you to it,” Rowena said with a small smile.
“You look… different.”
“Different as in bad different? I wanted to try something new.”
“You look beautiful,” I reassured her. “I didn’t think you would ever come back. I’m sorry to have put you in that situation. I’m sorry if what I said about my past scared you. That’s not me now, I don’t want to live that life anymore. You don’t have to be afraid of me.”
“I’m sorry that I ran away,” she said. “I’m not afraid of you or of your past. I was just overwhelmed.”
“I thought that I scared you so much you never wanted to be around me again,” I said. I cupped her cheek. When she didn’t push me away, I felt a knot inside of me suddenly release. “I want you to know that I’d never hurt you or let anyone hurt you, ever. I hope you trust me when I say that.”
She nodded. “That’s why I’m here. I do trust you. Even when I was scared, I knew you’d protect me. It’s just… so new to me, everything, I was living such a dull existence. Things were changing so quickly. I was a coward.”
She kissed me softly and sweetly.
“I want to make it work,” she said. “I want to be a part of your life. No
matter what it takes.”
I touched her lips. Her lipstick staining my thumb.
“What if we meet halfway?” I asked, holding out my hand. She took it, and I led her inside.
She gave me a questioning look. “Halfway?”
“I sold the club, I’m done with this life, I had to live it because it meant my survival but I don’t have to just survive now. I’m free to be happy,” I said, excitement rising in my voice. “I bought the building, your building, I’ve got some exciting plans for it.”
“I don’t understand…”
“It was something you said to me that night,” I explained. “You said that Babushka would’ve supported me in anything I wanted to do because she loved me. And I loved her, that’s why I stayed here so long, why I did all those things for her, but I don’t love this place like she did and I don’t have to do those things anymore.”
“I’m so happy for you,” Rowena smiled. "I suppose I have good news, too, I quit Mamas."
“So, I don't have to make Al disappear?"
She laughed. She shook her head. "I took care of him."
That's my girl, I thought. I hope she gave him what was coming to him.
“It looks like we're both making a new start,” I said, squeezing her hand. "What do you say we make this new start together?”
“Kiss me,” she said. “Kiss me, and then I’ll tell you what I think.”
The twinkle in her eyes was enough of an answer.
I kissed her. On the lips, all over her sweet face, and then one long, satisfying kiss.
When we came up for air, I looked at her expectantly.
“Have you locked the door?” she said, with a cheeky smile.
“Of course,” I said, with a grin.
My grin turned into an open-mouthed gape when she slid her slinky black dress off.
I was a lucky, lucky man.
Chapter Eleven
Rowena
One year later
Nikolas greeted me with a long, thorough kiss at his door.
“I have a surprise for you,” he said, his hazel eyes twinkling. He led me into the room and pulled out a blindfold.
I gave him a questioning look.
“It’s a good surprise,” he chuckled. “Turn around.”
I turned, and he placed the blindfold around my eyes gently. He pulled me close, burying his face into my hair.
“This is some sex thing, isn’t it?” I said, warily. “Did you get a playroom built?”
I could feel the laughter vibrating through his body.
“No,” he joked. “But maybe I’ll do that next time.”
I gripped his hand as he led me around his apartment.
He came to a stop and pulled the blindfold off. My eyes adjusted to the light streaming into the large windows of his penthouse.
“What?” My mouth fell open. On the marble counter was a Stradivarius violin. “I… I don’t know what to say. This is amazing.”
I almost didn’t want to touch it. I turned to Nikolas. “It’s beautiful.”
And expensive. Too expensive.
“You really shouldn’t have,” I continued.
“You deserve it, Rowena, I couldn’t have achieved what I did this year without you. Without your love and support. Just say you’ll play for me every evening.”
“Of course I will play for you,” I reassured him. “... maybe not every evening.”
We still lived in separate apartments, and some evenings I worked as a private music teacher.
“No, I want you to play for me every night for the rest of my life,” he said.
I raised an eyebrow. “You like it that much, huh?”
“Yes, but I don’t think you understand. I think I misspoke,” Nikolas smiled. “I want you here, with me every night for the rest of my life.”
He knelt down in front of me.
My heart started to pound so hard I could feel the rapid throbbing in my ears. I could hardly believe my eyes.
“Nikolas?” I said, my voice trembling. “What are you doing?”
“My sweet Rowena, I’m asking you to marry me,” he said. He slowly opened the small velvet box in his hands.
“Be mine, Rowena, I want to be with you forever. Marry me and let’s make a family of our own. The family that we’ve longed for all these years.”
Tears started to stream out of my eyes. I couldn’t believe that this man, this beautiful, sexy and kind man, was asking me to be his wife.
I thought of where I was only a year ago—the sad girl I used to be. I wished I could tell her that she would be ok. She would work it out. That she would find her love of music again and she would find the love of a lifetime.
Life worked in strange and unexpected ways.
“Yes,” I half sobbed. “I will marry you.”
I tugged at his arms, and he got back to his feet and crushed me into his arms.
He pulled away from me and let out a shout of glee.
“Yes!” he said, the boyish look in his face and the uncharacteristic cheer made my heart melt. “You’ve made me the happiest person in the world. I love you so much, Rowena.”
I felt a wave of gratitude wash over me. Nikolas was wrong, he wasn’t the happiest person in the world.
I was pretty sure that person was me.
“I love you, too, Nikolas, forever and always.”
Did you like Riding Red?
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Thank you! xox Kiki
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About the Author
Kiki Harlow loves to write short and steamy insta-love romances.
www.kikiharlow.com