Perfect Pride

by Kaye Draper

  The fae wrapped an arm around my middle, pressing deeper, making me gasp as he pulled me back, so my hips lifted from Hisashi slightly. "Oh, I think she can handle it. Gryphons are tough. Right, love?"

  His breath tickled over my ear and neck. "Gods, can we just stop talking," I groaned in challenge.

  Hisashi reached down and started easing his second cock inside me. While I still had Oisin sunk deep in my ass.

  Oh my fucking Gods.

  It was a stretch. Literally. But the minute I caught my breath and they started moving again, I saw stars.

  This time, when orgasm crashed over me, I took them with me. And none of us were quiet about it.

  I lay in a sweaty tangle of pale limbs, fox and fae. Once I could breathe again, I huffed out a laugh. "The whole neighborhood heard that."

  Hisashi shrugged and pulled me close to plant a soft, lazy kiss on my forehead. "The kid is so engrossed in Halstad's creepy books, she wouldn't notice if a train came through the building."

  Thank the Gods for small miracles.

  Oisin planted a sweet kiss on Hisashi's lips and we all went quiet. We lay there for some time, just basking, sharing gentle touches. But eventually all my worries started rushing back. I had a case to work on. The siren kids to look after. White's weird kid to be befriend. Halstad was still distant. Oh, and Kai's absence was a constant, nagging worry gnawing at my brain. And then there was the elephant in the room….

  Oisin swiped a gentle touch across my brow, smoothing out the muscles there. "I just got you to stop frowning. Don't start up again."

  I laughed. "Or what, you'll have to find another way to fix it?"

  He huffed. "Oh, don't think I won't--"

  I put a hand over his wicked mouth, shutting him up for the moment. I don't know why I thought it was suddenly a good time to share…but I felt so content there, my head pillowed on Hisashi's arm, Oisin draped over me in a boneless heap. "I need to tell you something."

  Hisashi shifted beneath me, but didn't say anything, just reached up to brush my hair back from my face in a soothing motion.

  Oisin lifted his head and gave me a smug look. "Oh? We've addled your brain so thoroughly you're finally going to share what's been bothering you for the last few weeks?"

  I shook my head at him, one corner of my mouth twitching. He was just mad he was on the other end of the whole secrets and lies thing. Usually, it was Oisin keeping things from me, not the other way around.

  "Well," he said, eyes twinkling with the anticipation of something juicy. "What is the big secret?"

  I snorted. "You're laying on it right now."

  He frowned at me, craning his neck to look down his long nose at where our bodies pressed together. "I hate to break it to you, darling," he said with mock gentleness, "but I've seen all this before. Delightful as it is, it's not really a secret."

  I silently laughed at him, making him vibrate where he lay on my stomach. "Oh, fae. Really?"

  Hisashi was silently laughing as well. I could tell he was about to burst with the need to just tell Oisin what I meant. But he held back.

  The fae sat up, sending a suspicious emerald glance between us. Hisashi and I sat up too, braced against the headboard as I took Oisin's hand and placed it on my stomach. "Here, silly fae. I'm pregnant."

  I don't know what I was expecting. Maybe Hisashi and Con's sweetness had lulled me into some sort of idiotic dreamland where my fae would laugh and smile and kiss us both, tell us how happy we'd made him.

  But this was my life we were talking about, not some sappy made for TV movie.

  Oisin yanked his hand away as if he'd just been burned. The cold, emotionless mask he wore around his enemies dropped into place and snarky, randy Oisin became King Oisin the frosty, untouchable fae asshole of yore.

  He just stared, green eyes hard and distant.

  "Oisin? Babe?" Hisashi said, his deep voice barely a whisper.

  I would have laughed with Oisin at the endearment, any other time. But Oisin didn't even blink. It was like he was suddenly miles away. I waved a hand in front of his face and pretended he was teasing us. "Hello. Earth to fae! Should I get the wine?"

  He swallowed, a visible pulse pounding away a million miles per hour under the translucent skin of his throat. Then he stood, scooped up his clothes, and…left.

  I stared at the door.

  Hisashi put an arm around me and pulled me closer to him, murmuring something in my ear. I couldn't hear him over the rushing sound in my ears as my blood pressure tried to decide between fainting and righteous anger.

  What the hell?

  "It will be okay," Hisashi was saying. "Just give him a minute. You know how he is about--"

  A knock on the door cut him short. "Company," Halstad's gravelly voice announced. Then his footsteps retreated as he high-tailed it away from the bedroom.

  I flopped my head back on the pillow and let out a sigh, fighting for equilibrium. "You said the kid was occupied," I accused Hisashi. "You didn't say there was anyone else around."

  He sat up and rummaged around for his clothes, treating me to a beautiful view of lean, marble-white muscles, abs and lats flexing as he twisted around to toss me my clothes. "It's not like I'm doing constant surveillance. I was just a little bit distracted. Plus, that's what we have wards for. And they aren't going off."

  I watched him numbly as he shimmied into his cute boxer briefs, jeans and hoodie. "That means whoever it is, they're friendly," he said. He grinned at me, pure evil covering up his hurt. "Probably your bestie stopping by to visit."

  It took a minute for me to realize what he meant. Then I growled. I was not friends with Derek fucking White. And if the damned wards considered a demon a friendly presence, then Halstad and Oisin needed to fucking rework the useless things.

  I tugged on my t-shirt and jeans and left Hisashi to process what had just happened. Maybe he'd go talk some sense into Oisin.

  Oisin didn't want the babies. He didn't want my kids. Or Hisashi's. I had naively thought he’d love them even more, knowing they were blood related to both of his closest lovers. Sometimes I was so fucking stupid.

  I passed the kitchen on my way to the stairs, backpedaling when I saw Halstad with his head stuffed in the fridge. "Who's here?" I said, altering my course to go grab a bottle of Oisin's sparkling water. Hisashi was right. The fae would come around eventually. In the meantime, I was going to irritate him every way I knew how. Starting with his fancy imported water.

  Halstad straightened, a container of leftover pasta in his gloved hand. His mismatched eyes bored into mine for a minute before he answered. "The incubus."

  I snorted. "You should have asked him to wait up here. He could have fed."

  He regarded me with a weird expression—half confused, half curious. "You lot really don't care who knows when you're fucking, do you?"

  I shrugged, but I couldn't stop the stupid blush I felt heating up my cheeks. "Orion has…issues. If he wants to suck up ambient energy rather than stalk prey, so what? He’s an incubus. It's not like he doesn't understand sex. And for him, it isn't some weird off-limits topic."

  I cracked open my water and took a sip as I watched Halstad digest that. It was the truth. The mage did act like sex was off-limits. Even if all the air seemed like it left the room anytime the two of us were near each other. It was fucking confusing.

  He went to microwave his lunch and I turned to go, sure he wasn't going to comment. Not that now was really the time to be having this discussion. As if I needed another lover, when I was busy destroying the lives of the ones I already had.

  His rough voice stopped me in my tracks. "I'm not judging you, you know."

  I glanced back to find him leaning against the countertop with his burly arms crossed over his chest, watching me with his borrowed fae eyes.

  "What?" I said stupidly.

  He shrugged and glanced away. "Your pride. The whole…poly thing you have going on. There's nothin' wrong with all that. You all care about each ot
her, that's plain."

  I leaned against the table and stared at him as I tried to figure him out. "Then what is it?" I said baldly. I had no patience for this stupid-assed game we were playing. "Why do you act like you want me one minute, then run away the next? I mean, I was serious when I told you things don't have to be sexual between us. You're welcome here—you're one of us regardless."

  I rubbed the back of my neck, uncomfortable. But I had done some research. "I know some people don't have any interest in sex. Asexual? That's fine. It doesn't change things between us, if that's how you feel." I lifted my eyes. "But…it doesn't seem like that's the case, to me." Then again, who knows? Plus, he might just run away for real if he knew my uterus was occupied.

  He ran a hand over his face and through his hair, looking both frustrated and…embarrassed? Then he straightened up and put on his big boy pants. He strode across the small space to stand right in front of me, looking up to meet my eyes, unflinching. "I do want you, gryphon. More than I've ever wanted anybody in my life."

  I swallowed. Okay. "So…."

  He looked down, long blond lashes kissing his scarred cheeks as he bit his bottom lip. Then he sucked in a breath and met my eyes again, his purple and gold gaze glowing with a hint of his magic. "I just need…things…." He muttered something to himself and that mulish, angry expression he wore when he was really, truly at a loss flowed over his face. "Can it be just us? Without the others?"

  My mouth had gone dry. I never considered myself some sort of sex goddess. In fact, before I met Oisin, my love life could best be described as "disaster” or “tame to non-existent." But the pull I felt toward each of my mates was so strong, and it felt so natural, that I sometimes lost sight of how weird our little arrangement might seem to outsiders. Especially outsiders who had essentially human roots.

  "That's…fine," I said awkwardly. Then something inside me let loose and I was laughing. It started as a wheeze and ended with me doubled over with tears streaming down my cheeks.

  Halstad just stood there, arms crossed, expression murderous. I straightened and tried to stop giggling like an idiot. Apparently, I was at my max tolerance for emotional stress for the day.

  "Glad I could amuse you," the mage said in a flat voice.

  I wiped my eyes and shook my head. "Oh, Gods. My life is so damned weird."

  I saw the slight flinch of pain in his eyes and reached for him, squeezing his shoulder. "Not you, idiot. Halstad, I thought you hated me. I thought you were only staying here because you thought you didn't have anywhere else to go, since this whole…freedom thing is new to you. Maybe you felt obligated to play along. I thought…." My voice broke and he uncrossed his arms, the tension flowing out of him.

  "Well, I didn't really give you any reason to think otherwise, now did I?" He pulled off one of his gloves and tentatively reached up to trace my jaw with his blunt fingers. "We're quite a pair. Both too stubborn and blind to know what's what."

  I smiled at him, ignoring the prickle tears—real ones this time, not from laughter. "Emotionally constipated," I clarified.

  He snorted a laugh. "Something like that." His hand cupped my cheek. "Look, girlie. I have a shit-ton of baggage dragging along behind me. And I ain't never had the luxury of having feelings. I don’t have the first clue how to do this relationship thing. And…Gods, I'm fucking terrified." He gave a self-deprecating laugh. "I've been ordered into dozens of battles I thought I wouldn't walk away from. And that shit wasn't half as scary as looking into those big gold eyes of yours and wondering how the hell not to fuck up the best thing that’s ever happened to me."

  I stepped closer and bent to press my forehead to his. I don't think I'd ever heard him talk so much. Or be so honest. "Welcome to my life," I said wryly. "I'd rather slug it out with a chupacabra any day than think I'd somehow hurt my one of pride."

  He slid his hand back behind my head to tangle in my hair. "I trust you."

  I pulled back enough to meet his eyes, to see the wonder and terror there. He did trust me. And trust wasn't something Halstad did lightly. It was something that terrified him. "It can be just us," I said softly. "Whatever you want. Whatever you need. Or nothing at all. It's all up to you, okay? Just…well, I've got baggage and secrets too."

  He let out a shuddery breath. I stared at him in wonder as I saw something I'd never noticed before. My mage was so vulnerable. He seemed so tough and hard. But he was…soft inside. Fragile. How the hell did he hide that so well?

  And what the fuck was I supposed to do with that knowledge?

  He pulled back, that bland, tough as nails mask falling into place with an almost audible click. "You'd better go see what your incubus buddy wants."

  I heaved a sigh and snagged my stolen water. "Yeah. Fine."

  But really, I was more than happy to beat a hasty retreat so I could escape all the emoting.

  Chapter 5

  I was still feeling a little odd and shaken when I joined Orion in the office. It was too much all at once. I didn't know what to focus on so I could work myself up to monumental amounts of pointless worry the way I so wanted to do.

  Orion was sitting in one of the wingback chairs—not lounging, like a normal person might, but sitting absolutely ramrod straight, not a wrinkle in his clothing, not a hair out of place. The incubus was as much a mystery as my mage. But he wasn't my mystery to unravel.

  Light blue eyes met mine, and the visible half of his pretty face transformed into a soft smile. "Hello, Gesa."

  I smiled back reflexively. I couldn't help it. Everything about the incubus's energy was the complete opposite of his stiff exterior. His aura was welcoming and warm. All the better to put his potential meal at ease. "Are you here to visit, or did White send you?" I asked tiredly.

  His smile turned wry. "I wish I could say I just stopped by to chat."

  I held up a hand as I sank into my office chair. "Then let’s just say that. Don't go and ruin my day by mentioning your employer."

  He shook his head. "Mr. White really does hold you in high esteem, Gesa."

  I laughed. "Right. I'm sure." Like one held a well-used tool in "high esteem." Please. Derek fucking White didn't do anything unless it benefitted him in some twisted, roundabout way.

  Orion sighed. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, Gesa." He held out a thick envelope. "Mr. White thought you should have copies of these. And he wanted me to let you know the children of the sea are being looked after."

  I opened the envelope and pulled out copies of driver's licenses, birth certificates…all the things the siren kids needed to prove they existed in this society. Why the hell did White think I needed the crap? It wasn't like I was their damned mother.

  "What do you mean, looked after?" I asked suspiciously. For all I knew, white had the kids running drugs or pole dancing or something.

  One corner of Orion's mouth lifted in a wry smile, like he knew exactly what I was thinking, and he shook his head. "The Ontonagon trade and cultural center will open up next week. It is part of Mr. White's most recent charity endeavor. The siren crosses will be the first class of young hopefuls to be trained in the trades or arts of their choice and placed in community internship and apprenticeship positions within the county."

  I narrowed my eyes. "That seems…like overkill." How the fuck much was I going to end up owing him for that little favor? Because it seemed like making friends with one awkward teenage girl was not an even trade.

  Orion lifted one shoulder in a dismissive shrug. "He just wants to make sure you are satisfied with your bargain. And…I know you think it is silly now, but there may come a day when your friendship with Miss Troya will become…a bit harrowing." His eyes held sadness that I didn't understand. "The girl's life will not be an easy one, I'm afraid. It will be good if she has friends who can support her when she needs it most."

  I lifted an eyebrow, completely confused. "I have no idea what the hell is going on there. Care to enlighten me…since we're friends and all?"

  He sighed.
"My employer is notoriously stubborn when it comes to sharing the things that are close to his heart. But rest assured," he said with a smirk, "I'm sure he'll turn to his new best friend with all his troubles eventually. I’ve been working on him."

  I gritted my teeth together. "I am not friends with that asshole."

  Black only laughed, the sound like a rippling caress. "Of course."

  I growled and he stopped laughing at my expense to pull another envelope out of his shiny leather briefcase. "I delivered White's message, now I have one of my own." He handed me the envelope, which had Con's name scrawled across it in script that looked too perfect to be hand-printed but probably was. "Can you please give this to Concord?"

  I took the envelope warily, like it might explode at any moment. Because, demons. They were from an entirely different realm than ours. Who knew what they were capable of? "What is it?"

  He ignored my suspicious gaze. "Con has been kind enough to help me with my…issues." His one visible cheek flushed at that admission. "But he refuses any sort of payment or favor on my part. I feel obligated to help him in some way, as he has helped me."

  I narrowed my eyes further. "You can't have my human, incubus," I muttered, only half joking.

  He shook his head. "I know he won't accept anything from me in exchange for his handiwork. But…it really has been beneficial. I want him to have this," he gestured at the envelope, "and I think he will take it from you more easily than from me."

  I slipped a finger under the flap of the envelope and peeked inside. It was a stack of papers, like a report. The top page was a black and white photo, a copy of a driver's license. I pulled the papers out and flicked a glance at Orion when I recognized the wide eyes staring back at me from the woman's picture. "Is this…?"

  He nodded. "His mother. I know Con is saddened by his upbringing. His father is deceased—which, quite honestly is probably a blessing. From what I understand he was not a nice person. But I was able to find his mother. It would have been impossible using purely mundane routes…but I have my ways. Her contact information and history are there, if he should wish to contact her. She was an immigrant. I believe she was…coerced into abandoning him when his father found out about her witch blood. She would be very happy if Con wanted to know her."