Of Thorns and Lightning
Page 20
The doctor worked to wash the dried blood off of her skin and once that was done, her injury was much less intimidating to look at for her and Dike. The doctor didn't expect she would need stitches, so she was bandaged with gauze pads and stretchy self-adhesive tape around her ribcage to ensure it was held in place.
"Dike, can you help her with changing the dressings each morning and night until she's healed?"
"Sure." He agreed. "If Meaghan's fine with that, then so am I."
"It's alright with me." Meaghan responded.
"Perfect. Let me give you some instructions and then I'll send you both off on your way."
When they were finished, the two of them walked out and went back upstairs. Meaghan was rocking an interesting look of her sports bra, blue medical tape around her torso and then her uniform pants with her utility belt and her shin guards. Dike made sure to tell William that she was alright. Dike walked Meaghan up to her room and reassured her that he would be back to change her dressings later that night, and to get some rest. She deserved it, it was barely noon and she had helped save New York as well as bleed all over everything. She and Maize had that in common for sure. Meaghan crawled into bed and slept, not able to wait until Maize to return to catch up with her and hang out. Rest was the top priority for everyone. William also advised them all to not watch the local news, but that was difficult for Peter and Maize out at breakfast.
At the diner, which was Malorie and Peter's favorite, they were all paying attention to what the Channel 8 news reporter was going on about. Every TV in that place seemed to be on different news stations, but they were all saying the same things; describing the attack in detail, but they differed on their opinions of the Gods and those who would ascend to their position.
"So, are you kids going to tell me what happened today? You both seem eerily calm for what I can see looks like happened this morning. I'd just have gone crazy. I don't know how you do it."
"No, because our faces are plastered all over every TV in New York and we're out in public immediately after. I just want to eat my pancakes in peace, you know? I'm afraid we're going to be bombarded at any second with scrutiny from the people, even though we saved them." Peter answered. “So let’s keep it down, and keep this talk to a minimum.”
"Now you just sound cynical. I don't want to believe the job has already taken that much of a toll on you that your whole outlook has changed."
"I don't want to believe it either, but I've already made awkward eye contact with eight people who looked at the TV and then looked over at Maize and are trying to piece it together. They can see her face, not mine in those clips."
"So, you're worried about Maize, is that it?" Malorie asked, investigative. Peter was caught off guard, knowing that this was a trick question and he wasn't sure how to answer. The answer wasn't no, but it wasn't quite a yes either. He stuttered as he tried to find the right words and he blushed a little, which May knew was an answer in itself. Maize did her best to ease the situation and try and develop the words Peter couldn't.
"I think what he means is that of course he's worried about me, none of us know what I'm capable of and I don't know when or how I can get hurt. Like, I could have died today, and I never would have known that it was possible for me to die that way. But he doesn't have to be worried about me all the time because I've got a magic hammer and that alone should be enough. Right?"
"Yeah, let's go with that." He agreed. Aunt Malorie had a different response.
"Oh, come on Peter. Of course, you're worried about her no matter if she's some god. You've had the biggest crush on her-"
"Malorie!" He exclaimed, not letting her finish that sentence.
"It's about time she knew! I thought you guys were already dating, too, but this seems to be news to everyone!"
"You know what, let's just eat our pancakes and not talk about this!" Peter requested, his voice rising in timbre. Maize blushed. In the past she thought she detected some sort of a crush between them but since nothing came about and they never talked about it and were dating other people, she always assumed that they would only be friends forever. Maize was okay with that, honestly, but she didn't know that she needed to hear those words from Malorie.
The rest of breakfast was awkward and silent. Maize didn't know exactly what to say, she couldn't identify the mood of the table. Peter wouldn't make direct eye contact with Maize, which made it even harder to finish off the breakfast date. Malorie made them promise that they would finally talk about their feelings with each other, to which she got a wishy-washy response.
Malorie knew they weren't going to talk about it.
Peter drove the two of them back upstate, and neither of them were quite looking forward to being together in another confined space together, especially after Malorie dropped the bomb that there were some feelings between them. But all Peter could focus on was Maize's dried blood underneath his fingernails, the only thing that remained from earlier gave him the red reminder that it all really had happened. He looked over just to convince himself that she was still real, but his curiosity was killing him- he wanted to know what haunting Maize was so badly.
The drive wasn't filled with empty silence mainly because Maize was so exhausted that the was dozing off. She hadn't gotten much sleep since she had visited Asgard and she knew somewhere inside her that she wouldn't ever sleep the same way again, like a normal person. She was almost completely a god and didn't have the same needs, but maybe she would sleep just for the enjoyment of it and not out of necessity. This was good because they didn't have to say anything, but their words seemed to mean nothing when their actions spoke so loudly.
Peter pulled into the garage at the compound and Maize woke up from her light sleep. They sat together in the Maserati for a few moments after Peter turned off the engine. Maize was regaining her surroundings and realized they were home, and Peter felt like he couldn't get out of the car just yet. There absolutely was unfinished business left to do.
Peter was nervous. He wanted to take a chance and just kiss Maize; something he had realized he had wanted to do. He wasn't sure if he should go for it, or if she would even kiss back. When Maize looked over at him their eyes met, and Peter took a deep breath and bucked up the courage to just kiss her...
Maize saw the look in Peter's eyes and was waiting for the moment he kissed her. For some reason she couldn't bring herself to make the first move, especially because Peter swallowed hard and went a little bit pale just before Maize thought they were going to kiss and he quickly turned around and got out of the car, and Maize was glad that she didn't go for it while he was running away.
"So, you're not going to kiss me?" Maize called after him as she leaned against her car, getting out after him. She rested her arms on the roof and looked over the car at Peter who was still walking away. Peter didn't turn and give her a response. William happened to be in the garage at the same time as this exchange and he raised an eyebrow, surprised at both Maize and Peter's actions.
"Did I miss something, here? What happened at brunch?" William asked, a little lost. The situation and the vibe between them had completely changed from when he saw them before the battle. He knew something happened, but Maize would never tell.
"Nothing, William. Nothing happened, as you can see." Maize answered, answering just with the kiss that wasn't, walking past him and going back up to her room. William knew that more happened than the missed golden opportunity and he would wait until Maize came around to tell him what was going on. He knew her look, and something was up. He inferred that she had another vision and this time it wasn't so nice.
Maize felt like a lot of things existed solely in her imagination. The visions, her feelings for Peter and his feelings for her, and it was hard to believe them until they came into fruition. But she had to face the fact that when things became real, sprung to life, that they weren't always going to be exactly how she planned them in her imagination. But until then, she would keep them safe in the confinement of
her mind, and she would ignore the fact that maybe she and Peter weren't meant to be. But she was hoping that they would, and he would finally kiss her.
Before it was too late.
Bad at Love
♦️
"God damn it!" Peter swore, slamming his door behind him and running his hands down his tired face. He was kicking himself for, in his opinion, fucking things up again. He should have kissed her, he should have kissed her, he should have kissed her... he repeated in his head. He didn't even think of the pros and cons of kissing her at this point. He knew what the right move was and what was the wrong one, and he knew that he made the wrong choice. He should have just kissed her. It was long overdue, and she wanted to kiss him back, too. He knew it. He saw it in her eyes, he read the situation. He knew, he knew, he knew. And he screwed it up.
It wasn't about him being afraid to love her because he didn't think he could love anyone else. He had moved on from that. He was now afraid that because he didn't kiss her, even though he really wanted to, that their relationship would never be the same. They would be caught in the spiraling vortex of "we almost dated" because that was a strange place to be in with someone else since all Peter knew he would think about what could have been love, what should have been...
Just then, he made the same mistake Maize had made not too long ago. Peter looked at pictures of him and Liz, him and MJ, and he was painfully reminded of all the mistakes he made in the past, taunting him, his own face laughing at him from inside the glossy pictures. Some were blurry, bad angled pictures of them when they were half clothed, or out on dates when Liz was camera shy, but all Peter's eyes were doing were admiring her, eyes on her at all times. With one glance of a picture of Liz's face, a cheeky smile hidden behind half of her hand, her skin aglow underneath soft lighting, he was immediately taken back to their last night together in the city. In hindsight, Peter was glad he made it worthwhile.
"Liz, come on! I just want to show you something beautiful, something even more beautiful than you." Peter said in his attempt to convince Liz to climb out her window and sneak out with him.
"Unless you're going to take me on a magic carpet ride of the city, Aladdin-style, then no! Do you know what time it is?! It is 2:37!"
"God, Liz, you ruined the whole surprise! And yes, I am well aware of what time it is. You've been studying all night and you deserve a break since I know you won't be getting to sleep soon."
"What, like you can fly?" She questioned, skeptical. "Now get off my fire escape before my neighbor’s notice... my dad has them keep an eye on me at all times, not like they didn't already. They are the literal DEFINITION of nosy neighbors, Peter."
“Liz, I promise it’ll be quick, I’ll have you back by dawn. I have something special I want to show you.”
“Okay, Peter Lannigan, you’ve got me.” Liz said as she climbed out her window and onto the fire escape, meeting Peter’s lips to kiss him before they tiptoed in their descent down their fire escape. They walked a few blocks uptown and then up another fire escape, to which Liz was skeptical of their permission to be there. But Peter was persistent that it was all fine, and he held her hand and led her up the metal stairs, passing dark windows as they rose.
It wasn't long before Peter and Liz found themselves at the top of an apartment building that was decorated with bistro lights and some small cafe tables, as well as a lattice on the far wall with ivy crawling up its weathered wood rungs, against the brick siding of the building. Liz needed a moment to take it all in.
“Wow, Peter, what is this?”
“It’s this building’s common garden. Come look, it's gorgeous up here. It gives a different angle of the city that you don't get at your building, and I thought you'd like it. Look, there's Central Park, and you can even see some of the bridges over there if you look hard enough on a clear night. I just thought you'd like it up here."
"Peter, I don't have any words." She admitted, speechless.
"That's okay. Sometimes you don't have to say anything in order to say something." He responded.
"You're right." She said before she turned to Peter and cupped his face in her hands and kissed him, over and over. She leaned against the brick wall underneath the lights and she kissed Peter until her lips were sore and she had bruises on her hips from the brick and Peter's hands as they pressed into her weak spot.
After they had spent a good part of the night kissing and touching each other-as if they weren't close enough-on the rooftop, Peter said that it was probably best she was returned home safely, especially before the sun rose.
They arrived back at Liz's building and they climbed through Liz's bedroom window that was still open from when she left earlier that night.
"Peter, wow, I..."
"Aren't you glad you came out with me tonight?"
“I’m not.” A deep voice spoke, coming from behind them. Liz gulped. It was her father.
Both Peter and Liz were frozen in their places; afraid of their punishment and the consequences.
That was the last time he ever saw Liz.
Peter hadn't heard one word from Liz since. Of course, he wouldn't, he's the reason for it all.
Peter threw down the pictures and they slapped on the desk before scattering on the surface. Then his mind shifted to MJ... all her friends called her MJ... Peter was just lucky enough to still be able to call her MJ, even though he didn't deserve it, it stuck.
This time, he was directly responsible for destroying MJ.
There was no doubt in his mind, he had taken full responsibility for his bullshit. He didn't mean it, though. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt MJ. She was there for him when she never had to be; sometimes he told MJ that he didn't want to bring her into it, but she dove right in anyway just so she could help him. She cared about him more than he cared about her, he realized, and he cared about her a lot. It haunted him every time he thought about MJ and how he left things off. He never had the chance to make it right, but maybe that was the way things were just meant to be between them. He hated to think of it that way. He wanted to be able to talk to her again, but it would be useless. He didn't change in the way that MJ needed him to in order for their relationship to work. It would never, ever be the same.
MJ had pulled Peter's shirt off and tossed it over the back of the couch, it is landing on the hardwood floor. She brushed the curls back from his forehead and her freshly manicured almond-shaped nails tickled the skin on his face. But Peter couldn't look into her eyes. Not in the same way anymore.
"Hey, I just remembered- let me show you this hilarious tweet Maize sent me today-" Peter began, and MJ immediately changed her body language. She pulled away from him immediately and got up off the couch, tossing his shirt back to him and grabbing her backpack.
"That's it, I'm out here, Peter."
"Wait, MJ! What just happened! What's up?"
"Peter, can you not see it?!"
"No, MJ, that's why I'm asking!"
"You're an oblivious asshole, you know that?" She answered with another question, but Peter was still standing there, clueless. MJ continued.
"Peter, you know more about her than you do for me. She is ALL you talk about, I can't have one conversation with you without hearing her name! I know she's your best friend and you grew up together, but I'm your best friend too and I feel like you don't care as much for me as you do to her, and I'm your girlfriend, to add."
"I'm sorry, I didn't know that I talked about her that much."
"Hun, look what just happened! I was literally undressing you and you stopped me to talk about some dumb thing she tweeted today, Peter. You just can't see it, can you? I'm going to leave now, and I don't want you calling me. You're ridiculous."
"MJ, let's talk this-"
"No, don't even finish that sentence, Peter. I am not going to listen to you say that one more god damn time, because you don't mean it, like everything else you've said to me."
"That's a lie, MJ. You know I mean it."
&n
bsp; "Yeah, you mean it when you blush and talk about Maize and make your schedule to fit Maize so we can't ever hang out because you're never free, and when we do, all you want to do is talk about what you did when you were with Maize. You know who you're in love with? You're in love with her, Peter. Deny it all you fucking want, but I'm not going to let you waste another second of my time, because it's mine and it's not yours to fuck up. Not anymore, at least."
"I'm not in love with her, MJ."
"You're a damn liar, I'm amazed. Completely baffled at how you do it. Go tell it to someone else, Peter. Try Maize, this time, maybe! We're done." MJ finished as she walked out the door, slamming it behind her. MJ fixed her lipstick and her hair and readjusted her clothes as she ran down the stairs and out on the street.