Of Sea and Song

by Chanda Hahn

  My body came alive at his touch, at the sight and smell of him, my hands eager to explore and running up his chest. Even pulling his shirt up to feel the muscles along his chest. A desire burned through us. It was a fire that couldn’t be quenched with just kisses.

  Brennon broke our kiss, and I could see it pained him to do so. I reached for him, but he pulled away.

  “I’m sorry, Meri,” he whispered. “I fear that if we continue, I will only hurt you in the end.”

  The rejection felt like a stab to my heart. The pain was intense, and I tried to move away, but he only dragged me closer to him, wrapping himself around me until he was cradling my small body. His chin rested on the top of my head, his leg over the top of my foot.

  “What I wouldn’t give to keep you forever,” he whispered. I heard the heartache in his voice.

  I wasn’t blind or stupid. He never once said love. Because he had to save that for his betrothed. I tried to blink the tears away, but they silently fell. Brennon must have sensed my pain, because he stroked the back of my hair and kissed my shoulder.

  This might be all we could have, and I suddenly realized it wasn’t enough. I wanted Brennon more than a friend or captain. I wanted him as a husband, for I was falling in love with him.

  I laid awake most of the night, my thoughts lost in heartache and a future that would never be ours. Brennon had fallen into a deep sleep, his arm wrapped around my waist possessively as if he, too, knew what we had wouldn’t last.

  Then I saw it. The softest pink glow across the sheet. At first, I thought it was the sunrise ebbing through the arched door. But the sky was still dark, and the birds hadn’t begun their morning song. The glow pooled from under the pillow in front of me. My arm slowly moved up to reach under the pillow, inching along so as not to wake Brennon, but terrified of what I would find.

  My trembling fingers found the hilt of the dagger, and I could feel a warm hum. I slid it from under the edge, and the ruby in the handle glowed. My head rested on Brennon’s arm; I could hear his heartbeat as if it was my own. And the dagger was flashing in perfect sync with his heartbeat.

  The heart stone in the dagger revealed its target.

  The person needed to end my curse so I could live—was Brennon.

  Chapter Nineteen

  I laid awake worrying, holding on to Brennon, and desperately trying to remember these feelings I had for him. But my worry led to exhaustion, and in the early morning, I fell into a troubled sleep. When I awoke, Brennon was gone. The sheets were cold and empty like my broken heart.

  The sun’s rays shone across my bed, promising a new day, but to me, it was a reminder that my time here on earth was short. I inspected my arm and saw a recent growth. The curse had claimed another inch of my life.

  Instead of facing the day and facing Brennon, I curled up in the coverlet and placed the pillow over my head. Maybe if I stayed like this long enough, I would wake up and realize it was all a dream.

  My door burst open with a thud. I peeked out from under the pillow, expecting to see Brennon, but I gasped as a large seal waddled into my room. His fur was silver speckled with black. He made a barking noise of protest at the foot of my bed, and when I didn’t respond, he hopped up and fumbled, wiggling himself onto my bed. I screamed as the beast flopped around, circling and messing up the blankets until he was comfortable.

  “Uh, hello,” I said, turning my head to the side to get a look at the seal. I hadn’t seen one this big or up close. They were all over the beach and the docks sunbathing. And I never expected to see one in my bed.

  He flopped to his back and flapped his fin on his belly, as if asking for a belly rub. I tentatively reached out my hand and patted his stomach. He made a deep sigh. When I stopped petting him, he shuffled around in the bed and forced his head under my hand.

  “Who are you?” I asked.

  The seal gave me a lazy look and huffed before curling up, closing his eyes, and going to sleep.

  “Uh, this is my bed.” I pushed him in the side. He lazily opened one eye and then closed it.

  A soft knock drew my attention to the door. A young woman with shoulder-length silver hair stood in the doorway. Her dress was simple, a dark-blue wrap dress with braided straps around her neck. She accessorized with white studded sandals and silver and turquoise bangles.

  She placed her hands on her hips. “You just made yourself at home, didn’t you, Lad?” She chastised him. “You need to ask permission first before you just adopt someone. Besides, you don’t know where they’ve been.” The girl gave me a sly wink.

  She came and patted Lad’s side, giving a whistle, and the seal just stuck his tongue out at her.

  “Well, I guess there’s my answer. He said he’s not moving, so you’re stuck with him.”

  “Does he bite?” I asked, slipping out of the bed and giving the seal a wide berth.

  “Only when you stop rubbing his belly,” she said, patting him there. “But consider it an excellent omen, because he doesn’t take to everyone.”

  “I need all the wonderful fortune I can get.”

  She stepped away from the seal and moved into the middle of the room, her hands at her sides, a wide grin on her face.

  “I’m Lucy. I’m here to help you settle in, Miss...?”

  “Merisol, but my friends call me Meri.”

  “What would you like me to call you?”

  “Meri, please.”

  She grinned, showing small, even teeth. A light blush rose to her face, and she called out into the hallway. A few more servants entered with arms full of dresses and a jewelry box.

  “We need to get you dressed for the day. What kind of dress would you like to wear?” She waved her hand, and I took in all the colorful silks, wrap dresses, and straps. A quick look at what the girls were wearing, and I became overwhelmed. I was used to wearing only dreary colors like brown and black with buttons. The thought of navigating those corsetless dresses gave me pause.

  “Whatever you choose for me will be wonderful,” I assured her.

  Lucy pursed her lips and pressed her finger to them. “Hmm, your hair is a deep-red, and any pastel colors would accent your skin tone just perfectly.” She rummaged through a few dresses until she found one that suited her taste. She picked out a soft-pink wrap dress and held it in front of me. Lucy helped me figure out the wraps that worked as a laceless corset, but what was most surprising was the extra length that split between the legs and tucked into a belt, giving me the illusion of wearing pants.

  Lucy brought gold sandals that wrapped around my ankles. From the jewelry box, she picked out a gold armband. She glanced at the white marks upon my arm and slid the band on.

  “I think it’s the perfect complement to your birthmark. It is so unusual.” Lucy pinched the band and then grimaced when she looked at my hair. “Who hacked up your beautiful hair?” She tugged lightly at the uneven layers that fell just below my shoulders.

  “It was a necessity.” I shrugged.

  Lucy took scissors to my hair and evened it out. It wasn’t the waist-length hair I lobbed off, but it was still flowing and feminine. She then immediately braided sections and pulled them back, securing them with a yellow Islayan flower.

  “There, beautiful.” Lucy clapped her hands and then addressed the seal sleeping on my bed. “What do you think, Lad?”

  The seal rolled up, gave me a look, and slapped his belly with his fin.

  “Lad approves.”

  “I guess I got his seal of approval.” I let out an unladylike snort and covered my mouth in embarrassment.

  Even Lad sat up abruptly and gave me a peculiar look.

  Lucy burst into her own odd laugh that sounded like a bark. Which only sent me into another round of laughter. The hilarity lightened the mood and my heart and was better than any of the medicinal tonic’s Rosalie or Rhea would have given me.

  I followed Lucy out into the hall, leaving the dagger hidden under the mattress. I wasn’t ready to deal with having
to look at that cursed piece today. I figured later on tonight I would chuck it into the whirlpool when no one was around.

  When we came to the main foyer, there was a lot of commotion. Servants were running through the halls. And I could hear Brennon’s loud, booming voice coming from farther within the palace.

  Something was wrong.

  “What is it?” I asked Lucy.

  She bit her bottom lip. “It isn’t my place to speak out.”

  I stood at the top of the stairs and watched as Brennon came storming out of the study a floor below.

  “There must be another way.” Brennon’s anger was monumental. I could tell he was only seconds away from losing what little control he had left.

  “It was our fault the thief snuck into the Undersea. We protect the entrance. It’s our responsibility to bring new life to our home.” King Roald chased after him. A smaller, less showy circlet embraced his noble brow. In his hand, he held the gold trident. He slammed the end into the marble floor so hard the room shook.

  Lucy gasped.

  “There must be another way.” The show of authority from his father didn’t faze Brennon.

  “If there were, you would have found it by now. I let you search for an alternative for three years, Brennon. It’s time to not be so selfish. As the future king, you have to think of others. Not your own wants and desires... no matter the pretty package it comes in.” King Roald gestured with his trident in a wide arc that rose to point me out on the second level.

  Brennon followed the trident, and when our eyes met, he froze. I knew what he was doing. He was fighting against the engagement. He was fighting for me.

  “I can... not.” Brennon’s shoulders were shaking with uncontrolled rage, and he turned to face his father.

  King Roald shook his head. “I’m disappointed in you, son. I thought I raised you better.”

  “Ask anything of me, and it will be done.” Brennon kneeled before his father, bowing his head in supplication. “Just not this!” Brennon cried. “Please do not ask me to continue with the engagement.”

  “If you do not—” King Roald’s volume dropped, and he spit with rage. “—you are no longer worthy to be my son. And you shall be forever known as the bringer of doom to both the kingdom above and the Undersea.”

  One of the handmaidens fainted at the announcement. Lucy’s complexion was pale, and I saw her sway before another girl wrapped her arm around her for comfort. It seemed there was more history and dire circumstances than I truly understood for so many to react this way. I was so anguished that I balled up my silk skirts in my fists, ruining the fabric in the process.

  My heart burst with joy at the thought Brennon was willing to give up everything to be with me. But then I was crumbling and dying inside with guilt, because he was turning his back on the kingdom, his father, his people.

  The skin of my marks tingled, and I remembered my curse. I couldn’t let him do this. I couldn’t let him doom everything, when my future was ill-fated.

  “King Roald,” I called out and dashed down the steps, placing myself in front of the prostrate Brennon.

  “You. When I first saw you, I thought you nothing more than a mere dalliance. Not someone my son would destroy two kingdoms over.” King Roald’s voice was dripping disapproval.

  “I’m sorry, Your Majesty. I never meant to cause a rift in your family.”

  “Meri, what are you doing?” Brennon grabbed my hand and tried to pull me away from his father.

  I wrenched my arm away. “I’m sorry. I can’t let you do this.”

  Brennon’s face became wary. He stood up. “What do you mean?”

  Standing firm, I raised my chin and announced, “I won’t stand in the way of his engagement.”

  “Now finally, someone with a speck of sense.” King Roald looked pleased.

  “This isn’t just your decision. It’s mine as well.” Brennon turned to address his father. “And I choose to break this engagement.”

  “No!” I shouted louder than I meant to. My voice echoed among the halls. The stillness that followed was eerie.

  Brennon looked completely baffled. He took a step toward me, and I retreated, turning away and hiding my face from him.

  “Meri, what is going on? Don’t you see? I’m doing this for us. I want to marry you.”

  My heart was breaking into a million pieces, the tears welling in my eyes. My chest burned as I struggled to take even a single breath. I knew what needed to be done, but I didn’t have the strength. Drawing on every ounce of willpower I had deep within me, I locked away my love, hid the pain, and steeled my face to be cold and heartless. I had to or this wouldn’t work.

  “But I—” I put as much hate and disdain as I could in my voice, and I spun, directing all of my raw emotions toward Brennon. “—don’t want to marry you!”

  Brennon stood there, still as a statue, his face one of disbelief. His brows furrowed, his nostrils flared, and his resentment rolled across his face.

  He shook his head. “I don’t believe you.”

  I formed my words like poison daggers aimed at his heart.

  “Believe it.” I shrugged. “For I was using you. You were just an end to a means. I wanted to get away from the Brunes Guild. You were my ticket out. That is all.”

  The silence that followed was deafening.

  Brennon stewed as my words slowly haunted him. His head dropped; his white-knuckled fists were shaking by his thighs. I had never felt more evil or cruel than I did in this moment.

  When I killed the mayor’s son, it had been an accident. I had never purposefully injured a person. But right now, I was trying to drive a wedge between Brennon and me. Not just a wedge, but purposefully create damage that could never be repaired.

  Hurting him hurt me. But at the same time, I realized how powerful the pain that came with it was. And pain was power.

  I was proud that I had hidden my tears, for Brennon slowly came forward and stood toe-to-toe with me.

  Over Brennon’s shoulders, I saw Vasili walk in from the bedrooms on the second floor, his hair a mess, his clothes wrinkled, and he was barefoot. He had obviously just woken up. Vasili stopped, leaned on the banister, and looked on with interest at the argument that was happening below.

  “Meri, look at me,” Brennon whispered so only I could hear.

  I couldn’t. What he was asking was too much. If I looked. He would see I was lying.

  “Meri, please. Just look at me.” Brennon reached out a hand to touch my face, but then it fell to his side.

  Steeling myself, I met those sea-blue eyes and wanted to crumble. I could see his vulnerability and his love. He wanted reassurance, but I couldn’t give that to him. Because one of us had to be strong enough to do what was right.

  I stared up at him, didn’t blink, and tried to pretend that I had somewhere else I would rather be.

  “W-why?” he asked, his voice breaking.

  “Because—” I swallowed and tried to think of something that would permanently end this. I glanced up, and Vasili yawned, stretching his arms. “—I’m engaged to Vasili.”

  “What!” Brennon roared.

  Vasili choked in surprise. “What?”

  I glared at him. Vasili gave me a wry, answering smile. He tried to straighten his wrinkled shirt. “Oh yeah, that’s right.” He ran barefoot down the marble stairs and put a hand around my waist. “We got engaged this morning. Sorry, forgot to tell you.”

  Brennon’s jaw clenched. His hands raised for Vasili’s throat, and I was about to witness another brawl between the two.

  King Roald’s deep laugh stopped them. “Well, that seems to settle it then. When Brennon’s future bride arrives, we will have two engagements to celebrate.”

  “And when can we expect this young flower to join us?” Vasili tried to lay on the charm by giving me a wide smile and nuzzling his nose against my neck. I wanted to swat him away like an annoying gnat.

  Brennon took a threatening step forward, but Vasil
i flashed him a stony glare.

  “She arrives tomorrow’s eve. The wedding will take place in three days.”

  King Roald clapped his hands, and the servants scattered. Brennon, Vasili, and I were the only ones left in the foyer.

  I was going to faint. My knees went weak, and Vasili sensed it. His grip tightened, but I was slipping. He pulled me into a fake embrace, giving me time to regain my composure.

  “Why you had to include me in your game is beyond me,” Vasili whispered. Wrapped in Vasili’s arms, I didn’t feel an intense rush of emotions like I did with Brennon. I just felt warm and safe. His lips brushed my cheek as he spoke. “But I will gladly play the part you have assigned.”

  I only squeaked a little in surprise and had to use all of my might to not hit him or push him away. It was a very chaste kiss, and it surprised me how different it was from Brennon’s. I liked Vasili very much, but this kiss didn’t give me butterflies or make my toes curl. And it seemed like it was the same for him.

  He lifted me back up, and I cast a wary glance at Brennon. The prince’s eyes were cynical, his hatred clear as he turned and silently stalked off.

  “Well, love, if your goal was to make him jealous, you did it.”

  “I’m not your love,” I corrected and punched him lightly in the shoulder.

  Vasili stepped away from me and gave me a great bow. “As long as we’re engaged, you will forever be my love.”

  “No.”

  “My sea flower?” he asked.

  I shook my head.

  “Sea horse?”

  “Stop!” I panicked. “No nicknames.”

  “Nonsense, if we’re going to pretend to be engaged, then I shall dub thee all the nicknames just to annoy you.”

  I raised a wary eyebrow.

  “I have to get something out of this. So, I’ve decided to have fun. Besides, you are the one who is being cruel to my best friend.” He crossed his arms.

  I sighed. “I’m doing this for him and for your kingdom.” I sat on the second-to-bottom marble step. I crossed my arms over my knees and rested my forehead on my arms. Vasili moved to my left and sat next to me. He gave my back a reassuring pat.