One Big Joke
Page 19
By reflex rather than conviction, Lenny leaned forward and said, “But we’re New Yorkers. New York is where we live.”
“Right. And a year or so ago, when you were feeling so miserable and we were fighting all the time, where were we living then?”
“In a small apartment. With a crappy rug.”
“Fine. Blame the rug. And when you couldn’t stand it anymore, and when we even thought maybe the marriage was falling apart, where did you go?”
“Someplace where I had a friend.”
“You have friends lots of places, Lenny. Why’d you pick Key West?”
He sipped some coffee. “Well, for one thing, it was winter. But okay, maybe it was because, up here, everything just seemed so goddamn serious, like the-sky-is-falling serious, and you’re supposed to feel guilty, like you’re a bad and trivial person if you don’t buy into that. Which I didn’t. And still don’t. So I thought Key West might sort of be the antidote. You know, goofy, light.”
“Except,” Marsha put in, “for things like Mafia vendettas and occasional acts of arson.”
“True, it got a little more serious than I expected. But in a different way. Not big-picture-Armageddon-doom-and-gloom. More like just dealing with what’s in front of you, doing the right thing in that moment. Helping your friends. So yeah, I got a little bit more serious.”
“And I got a lot less solemn,” she admitted. “Out from under the shit-pile of the evening news. Key West sort of brought things back to actual size.”
She picked up her coffee cup and half-hid her face behind it before adding, “Ever think of moving there, Lenny?”
It was a question that had been silently simmering for years, but even so it seemed abrupt when spoken out loud and it called forth a nervous laugh. “Hell yeah. All the time. Great fantasy. Great safety valve. Someday we’ll just retire to a little yellow house down in the Keys...”
“Like, when?”
“Like, I don’t know. Later. When we’re a little older. Working less hard. Ready to back off a little. Ready to slow down a little.”
“Ready to be happy?” Marsha asked.
“Yeah, maybe. Maybe then. Maybe when we’re more ready to kick back and be happy.”
She raised her coffee to her lips and took a sip. “That place on Amsterdam,” she said. “Location’s great but the light just wouldn’t suit us.”
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Laurence Shames has been a New York City taxi driver, lounge singer, furniture mover, lifeguard, dishwasher, gym teacher, and shoe salesman. Having failed to distinguish himself in any of those professions, he turned to writing full-time in 1976 and has not done an honest day's work since.
His basic laziness notwithstanding, Shames has published more than twenty books and hundreds of magazine articles and essays. Best known for his critically acclaimed series of Key West novels, he has also authored non-fiction and enjoyed considerable though largely secret success as a collaborator and ghostwriter. Shames has penned four New York Times bestsellers. These have appeared on four different lists, under four different names, none of them his own. This might be a record.
Born in Newark, New Jersey in 1951, to chain-smoking parents of modest means but flamboyant emotions, Shames graduated summa cum laude from NYU in 1972 and was inducted into Phi Beta Kappa. Shortly after finishing college, he began annoying editors by sending them short stories they hated. He also wrote longer things he thought of as novels. He couldn't sell them.
By 1979 he'd somehow passed himself off as a journalist and was publishing in top-shelf magazines like Playboy, Outside, Saturday Review, and Vanity Fair. In 1982, Shames was named Ethics columnist of Esquire, and also made a contributing editor to that magazine.
By 1986 he’d made the transition to non-fiction books. His 1991 bestseller, BOSS OF BOSSES, written for two FBI agents, got him thinking about the Mafia. It also bought him a ticket out of New York and a sweet little house in Key West, where he finally got back to Plan A: writing fiction.
With FLORIDA STRAITS, Shames introduced the much-loved character of Bert the Shirt and launched his perennially popular series of KEY WEST CAPERS, of which ONE BIG JOKE is lucky number thirteen.
To learn more, please visit www.LaurenceShames.com
Works by Laurence Shames
Key West Novels—
One Strange Date
Key West Luck
Tropical Swap
Shot on Location
The Naked Detective
Welcome to Paradise
Mangrove Squeeze
Virgin Heat
Tropical Depression
Sunburn
Scavenger Reef
Florida Straits
Key West Short Fiction—
Chickens
New York and California Novels—
Money Talks
The Angels’ Share
Nonfiction—
The Hunger for More
The Big Time