by Penelope Sky
“I don’t know…”
“Please.” He begged with his eyes. “Could you just ask him?”
I knew Hades didn’t want to see anybody right now, but I couldn’t deny Damien’s request. “Let me see.” I walked back into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed.
Hades didn’t meet my look. “No.” He must have heard Damien’s voice through the door and already made up his mind.
“You haven’t seen anyone…”
“I said no.”
I continued to stare at my husband, seeing the rage in his eyes. He could convey such raw emotion with very little expression. Years ago, I couldn’t read him, but now I understood even the slightest movements. “What happened between you two?”
“All of this happened because of him.” He grabbed his left hand and massaged the knuckles of his fist, as if he fantasized about punching Damien in the face. “Tell him to leave me the fuck alone and not come back.”
“I understand you’re upset, but he didn’t mean for any of this to happen. He’s your best friend…”
“I don’t give a shit what he meant to happen. He’s no friend of mine.”
“Hades…”
“Tell him to leave, or I will.”
I knew he would make good on his threat, so I returned to the hallway. I closed the door behind me and crossed my arms over my chest. “He needs his space right now…”
Damien’s eyes fell with devastation. “I know that’s not what he said.”
“Give it time. I’ll talk to him.”
He ran his fingers through his hair nervously. “It won’t change anything. I fucked up.”
“He’s just angry right now. You know how he gets. If you give him enough time and space, he’ll come around.”
Damien shook his head slightly. “Not this time…”
11
Hades
My recovery was taking a lifetime.
I understood I needed to be patient…but I’d never been patient.
I took what I wanted, and if I couldn’t, I made it happen. But I was at the mercy of God’s design. This would take time, and there was a serious possibility that I would never be the same. My shoulder may always ache, my ribs may hiss with every breath, and I would never be quite as strong as I once was.
But it was worth it. I got my wife back… That was all that mattered.
Ash came to my bedroom for a visit. After Sofia let him inside, he approached the edge of my bed. “Haven’t seen you in a while. Thought we could catch up.”
My brother had been my enemy, and now he was my only friend in the world. Damien had been cut from my life with a butcher’s knife. I never wanted to see that son of a bitch ever again. He’d ruined my life. I nodded to one of the armchairs. “Take a seat.”
Sofia glanced back and forth at us before she slipped on her heels. “I’ll leave you two alone.”
I watched her grow four inches taller in the shoes. “You don’t need to leave, baby.”
“I should have dinner with my mom anyway.” She moved to the door. “I’ll be back in an hour or so.”
Ash grabbed a bottle of scotch and made himself a drink. “You want one?”
“I wish.”
“Oh, that’s right.” He took a seat next to me. “You’re on all those pain killers.” He tilted his head back and took a drink.
“Among other things…”
He licked his lips then stared at me for a long time. My brother wasn’t afraid of eye contact. In fact, he thrived on it. “How are you?”
“Fine.”
“That’s not what I’m asking about.” He set his glass on my nightstand, then settled into the chair. “You’ll get over this…in time. A couple broken bones won’t defeat you.”
He was asking about the one thing I didn’t want to talk about. “I’m not okay. I’ll never be okay.”
My brother’s eyes shone with sympathy. “She seems to be alright. She’s a strong girl.”
“She’s the strongest woman I know. But even if it didn’t hurt her at all, it’ll always kill me.” I looked away because I didn’t want this conversation to continue. I was angry with everyone, from Damien to Maddox. But I was angriest with myself.
What kind of man was I?
My one job was to protect my wife. I promised her I would. I promised that no one could ever touch her. Turned out, that was just a bunch of bullshit. I was a worthless human being, and I deserved to die in that field.
Ash took another drink then wiped his bottom lip with his thumb. “I’m sorry, man. I really am.”
“I know you are.”
“What’s your next move?”
“Get back on my feet. Kill Maddox. It’s pretty simple.”
Ash gave a slight nod. “May not be that simple. He’ll expect it.”
“Doesn’t make a difference. I’ll get him one way or another.”
“You got me and Damien behind you.”
I hated hearing that fucker’s name. If I didn’t want to kill Maddox so badly, I would exclude him from everything. But I needed all hands on deck. Once we were done, I wouldn’t need Damien for anything anymore. Then he could rot in hell. “You’ve stayed here long enough. I know you have a life to get back to.”
“Not really.” He shrugged. “I thought about what you said…”
“You want to be a partner?” That was perfect now that Damien wasn’t part of my life anymore. I needed someone I could trust, someone who wasn’t a complete idiot.
“No.”
I cocked an eyebrow.
“My business interests have changed. Witnessing this whole thing has given me a change of heart. You’re right, I don’t want to be that guy…”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “Then what are you gonna do?”
“Be a pimp.”
I gave a slight smile, but I couldn’t tell if he was joking or not. “A pimp?” I asked incredulously.
“Yeah, it’s perfect. It’s pretty much what I was doing already.”
“So, you’re gonna have a bunch of prostitutes work for you, and you’re gonna hand them out to clients?”
“Exactly. But in this case, the women are volunteers, and they make that moolah.”
“And what about all the girls you already have?”
Ash grabbed his glass again. “They’re free to go.”
“You do realize that they’ll turn you in?”
He shrugged. “Then what? You think the cops are gonna touch me? They’re my biggest clients.”
Being a pimp wasn’t the most respectable line of work, but it was a dramatic improvement over what he was doing before. “Well, I think it’s great.”
“And if you were single, you’d think it was really great.”
I gave a slight chuckle even though it hurt my ribs a bit. “I can’t believe you’re gonna be a pimp. It just sounds so ridiculous. Are you gonna get one of those bright purple suits?”
He couldn’t hide the grin that crept onto his lips. “Shut the fuck up, bitch. Now you’ll never see my best inventory.”
“I already have the best inventory.”
He winked. “Touché.”
“Does that mean you’ll be leaving, then?”
“Depends. If you need me, I’ll stay. Not a bad idea to have me outside your door every night.”
“I don’t need any help, Ash.”
He took a drink then set down the glass. “See, that’s the problem. If you needed help, you would never ask for it.”
No, I never would.
“So, I’ll ask your wife what she thinks.”
“I don’t need my woman making decisions for me.”
“When she’s taking care of you, I disagree.”
Sofia had been at my side day and night. Instead of going back to work and resuming her life, she chose to spend all of her time with me. She’d been a captive for an entire month, but now she was cooped up in a room all over again. When she’d brought my ring to the hospital, it touched me so deepl
y. Seeing the way she attended to me like a wife who loved her husband was exactly what I wanted. But it was still hard to let her see me in my weakest state.
“How much longer do you think you’ll need?”
“It’s gonna be at least a month.”
“Damien and I can always take care of it.”
I wanted Maddox dead, but I wanted to be the one to kill him. “No. I have to handle this myself.”
“At least, when you’re getting laid, she’s doing all the work. That must be nice.”
I hadn’t looked at my wife that way once. I felt too weak to be desirable, and I would never instigate anything after what she’d been through. I’d hardly touched her since I’d been home. When we slept together, I stuck to my side of the bed. She never talked about what she’d endured. And I never asked. I just assumed she wouldn’t be ready for something like that anytime soon. I could give her all the time she needed. “It’ll be a long time before Sofia and I have that sort of relationship again.”
He seemed to realize how insensitive he sounded. “Of course…” He cleared his throat and took a drink. “Like I said, if there’s anything you need, I’m here. My pimping duties can wait until you’re back to full strength.”
“Thanks.” I couldn’t believe my brother was sitting beside me, acting like a friend rather than a stranger. “I’m really glad you’re here…and not because I need help.”
It was the first time he turned his gaze away, like the statement affected him deep down inside. “Yeah…I’m glad I’m here too.”
Once I was back on my feet, I moved around the house more. I showered on a daily basis, got dressed on my own, and didn’t feel so weak. I started to feel like my old self, like a strong man in his prime.
Sofia stayed home with me even though I didn’t need so much help anymore.
It was deep winter now, and every morning, the frost pressed against the windows. I walked around in sweatpants, but I still ditched the shirt. It just wasn’t as comfortable to me. I was sitting outside on the patio because it was a sunny day. I handled work from the computer, and I only communicated with Damien through our assistants.
Sofia came outside and brought me a hot cup of coffee. “Ready for lunch?”
“Not hungry.”
“You’re never hungry.”
All I’d been doing was lying in bed. The last thing I wanted to do was get fat. Just because I was sedentary didn’t mean I could let my strength go. When I got out of this, I had to correct all my mistakes. I had to kill Maddox with my bare hands.
“You still need to eat.” She took the seat beside me, wearing a long sweater dress with brown boots that went to her knees. Her brown hair was curled and long, and the makeup on her face made her seem too beautiful to be real. Her diamond ring was still on her left hand.
I had worried Maddox had taken it away. “When I’m hungry, I’ll eat.”
She dropped her insistence and looked at the city below her. On the outside, it seemed like nothing had changed, like she hadn’t been the target of a violent crime. But there were subtle cues that I noticed. Her eyes didn’t roam over my chest and shoulders the way they used to. She didn’t grab the front of my shirt and yank me toward her for a kiss. When we were in bed together, she never tried to make it into something more. She didn’t even try to pull me close. There was no hint of arousal in her gaze.
Maybe it was because my body was so scarred. Maybe she didn’t want to hurt me. Or maybe now that I wasn’t as strong as I used to be, she’d lost her lust.
Or maybe it was because of the thing I didn’t want to think about.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss sex.
I didn’t just miss it…I missed it with my wife.
I missed that closeness, that tenderness. It was the closest I could get to her heart, the closest I could get behind her walls and pretend she felt the way I did.
But I wouldn’t dare pressure her. Wouldn’t even mention it.
She’d have to do that on her own. Or at least tell me she was ready.
She turned her gaze back to me. “You look so much better… That makes me really happy.”
“I’ll be better before you know it.” I never confessed how much pain I endured. I didn’t tell a soul how miserable I was. I stayed positive to ease her pain. I was in this condition because I sacrificed myself for her. I didn’t want her to feel worse than she already did. It was easy to focus on the finish line and forget all the roadblocks along the way.
“I know…” She reached her hand for mine on the table, her fingers so little in my palm. She gave me a gentle squeeze, accompanied by her beautiful smile.
I’d give anything to kiss her right now.
To pull her into my lap and dig my hand deep into her hair. I would love to go back to what we were before that evil man ruined our lives. It used to be just the two of us, slowly solidifying our relationship.
Now we had to start all over.
I’d earned my brother’s forgiveness, but that didn’t seem to matter. Now that Sofia had to struggle with this new agony, it made no difference if she could love me. She was too burdened to be able to do so anyway.
After weeks passed, I made it all the way down to the bottom floor and stepped outside. The black car was waiting for us, and I realized it was the first time I’d left the house since I came home from the hospital.
Sofia was with me, insisting she join me for my first round of physical therapy.
After we got into the back seat, the driver drove off.
She was loyal and attentive to me every moment of the day, but there was a distinct distance between us. We both had our own issues, but we refused to confide in each other. As a result, there was a minefield of silence between us.
We used to hold hands in the car, or she would rest her cheek on my shoulder. Now, we sat on opposite sides of the car, hardly saying anything to each other. When she looked out the window with a somber expression on her face, I wondered what she was thinking, if she was reliving the terrible things she never mentioned.
We arrived at the facility, and I walked inside with a straight posture, pretending to be as strong as I used to be. I didn’t want Sofia to view me as weak, to assume I would never get her the revenge she deserved. I felt like I wasn’t worthy of her, and I didn’t want her to think that too.
Not long after we checked in at the front desk, they were ready to see me.
Sofia moved to take a seat, as if she expected to watch me until I was done.
“Sofia?”
She turned back to me, immediately enthused by the possibility of me needing her assistance. “Yes?”
“I need you to wait in the car.”
Her eyes fell. She looked so hurt that it seemed like I’d slapped her across the face.
“I just need some privacy.” I hated to hurt her, but I didn’t want her to watch me struggle to complete ordinary tasks. It was humiliating. It wasn’t a version of myself I wanted her to see.
“I don’t understand…”
“I don’t want you to see me like this, okay?” It was hard to deny her when her eyes looked so innocent, like she would never judge me for anything.
“See you like what?” she asked. “I don’t think less of you, Hades. You could be in a wheelchair, and my opinion would never change. Watching you overcome this makes you strong, not weak. You don’t have to put on a show for me. I’m your wife. I’m always gonna be here.”
Her words went straight to my heart, but my pride was too great. If the therapist asked me to do something and I couldn’t, I’d feel like less of a man—especially if my wife witnessed my shortcomings. If it were Ash or someone else, I probably wouldn’t care. But her opinion meant the world to me. If she thought I was weak, she might never love me. “Please wait in the car.” I didn’t want to see the hurt look on her face, so I turned away so I wouldn’t have to.
12
Sofia
I sat across from my mother at the dinner table. We s
hared a bottle of wine, and I picked at the dinner Helena made for us. Fresh bread and butter were in the basket, and the room smelled like a gourmet meal.
My mother rambled on about something. “I’m so glad the Tuscan Rose seems to be operating smoothly. We’ve got good employees there, loyal employees. I think your father and Gustavo would be happy about this legacy. And it’s amazing that Hades can keep everything tidy while going through this…”
I stared down into my glass of wine and ignored everything she said. When Hades had asked me to leave his physical therapy, I was hurt by the request. After everything we’d been through, how could he not feel comfortable with me? He’d sacrificed himself for me, did something most people wouldn’t have had the courage to do. The last thing I thought was that he was weak. In fact, he had my undying respect.
I knew he probably felt guilty about what happened. But he shouldn’t. In the end, he was the one who saved me.
That was all that mattered.
“He’s recovering so quickly… It’s remarkable. Nothing is gonna stop that man…”
Most of my dinner was untouched because I didn’t have an appetite. My life was in a strange place. Time was moving so slowly, and I’d thought things would go back to the way they were, but that didn’t seem possible.
We were different people.
We both struggled with our demons, and we probably would be haunted forever.
“Honey?”
I swirled my glass and took a drink.
“Sofia? Are you listening to me?”
At the mention of my name, I lifted my gaze and made eye contact with my mother. “Yes?”
She shook her head slightly. “That’s a big fat no.”
I didn’t have the energy to entertain my mother. I didn’t have the strength to smile and pretend as if everything was okay. I wanted my husband to make a full recovery and not be insecure during the process.