Close to Home

by Janet Gover

  ‘There is nothing to forgive, Madame, and if there was, of course I would forgive you.’

  The boy gave a sort of half-bow, which Lucienne found quite gallant. She nodded in appreciation.

  Finn hesitated for a moment, then straightened his back and faced her squarely. She seemed to be watching the boy become a man.

  ‘Now, if it’s all right, I have a favour to ask.’

  Lucienne knew what was coming. ‘Yes, of course you may return to le cirque.’

  Finn’s face brightened. ‘Thank you, Madame.’

  Jenny’s face also brightened. That was good. The girl really cared more for the boy than for herself. Lucienne appreciated that. ‘So, we will give you a phone, or whatever, and you and Jenny will remain in touch. Yes?’

  ‘Oh, yes. Thank you!’ Jenny was literally jumping up and down.

  ‘And I’ll come back with the circus every season,’ Finn assured the girl. ‘And we …’ His voice trailed off and he went a little red in the face.

  Lucienne approved of that too.

  ‘Bien. Monsieur and Madame Harden, I hope you will accept and forgive the impulsiveness of the young, yes. No harm has been done.’

  ‘Well, I guess so—’ Before Peter could finish, his wife slapped him none too gently on the upper arm.

  ‘Of course we do,’ the woman said. ‘It’s all very romantic of course, and Jenny, I am proud that you wanted to help Finn when you saw what his father was doing, but promise next time you’ll talk to me or your father. Not that there will ever be a next time. Well, you know what I mean.’

  ‘Yes, Mum. Sorry.’ Jenny darted across to hug her mother.

  Lucienne nodded. ‘I think, Simon, it is time to go.’

  ‘I certainly could use some sleep.’ Her grandson got to his feet. ‘And I imagine you didn’t sleep too well last night either, Grand-mère.’

  ‘I am old, chéri, I do not need to sleep. But you must rest. We have a long drive this evening.’

  Simon nodded in understanding, but Meg looked confused. ‘A long drive?’

  ‘Yes. Tonight, Simon and I return to the circus. Finn, you will come with us. But first, there is much to do.’

  Jenny’s parents also seemed anxious to leave. The girl stood looking from her parents to Finn, her face uncertain.

  ‘You go with your parents, Jenny,’ Finn said. ‘I’ll come over before we leave.’

  ‘And when you do,’ Barbara said, ‘you come to the front door. You two don’t need to go around hiding. All right?’

  Jenny and Finn nodded. The girl looked almost as happy as she was tired as she followed her parents out of the room.

  Lucienne saw the same hesitation in Meg’s eyes.

  ‘Simon, why don’t you take Meg home, then come back for me?’

  She smiled as she watched her grandson and the teacher leave, approving of the closeness developing between the two of them. It was well past time Simon opened his heart again.

  She heard a chuckle from the other side of the room.

  ‘When it comes to looking after your family, you are just as bad as I am,’ Alice said.

  Lucienne had to agree. ‘We are les matrones of our families, are we not? And we have wisdom. Thus it is our role to care for our families, n’est-ce pas?’

  ‘Yes, Madame, it is.’

  CHAPTER

  37

  The early morning air had a refreshing crisp feeling the next time Simon set out for a run from Three Rings. In the weeks he and his grandmother had been away, summer had turned and autumn was approaching. In the distance he heard the sound of a kookaburra laughing to greet the day. He felt great. He was sleeping better now. The dreams still came, but less often than before. Nyringa and its people had been good for him. Three Rings had been well cared for while he and his grandmother were with the circus. In the house paddock, he could see Coco dozing under a tree. The mare too had been well cared for and she was no longer alone: a couple of retirees from other circuses had joined her. He didn’t worry about feeding them. His grand-mère would want to do that for herself. Right now, he had other things on his mind.

  He crossed the yard to the wooden shed. Pushing the door open, he flicked on the lights. The carousel sat where he had left it, a thin layer of dust covering the fresh paint on the completed sections. There was a lot more to do and he was looking forward to doing it. Being the ringmaster of a circus was challenging and demanding, but it wasn’t for him. He was glad they’d found a new man to lead the troupe, so that he and his grandmother could come back to Nyringa. Driving through the town last night really had felt like coming home. He’d missed this place. He’d missed those quiet hours in this shed, repairing something beautiful. And he’d missed the woman who had kept him company as he did it.

  Simon turned the light off and left the shed. He broke into a slow jog as he headed down the gravel drive to the road. By the time his feet touched the bitumen, he was warmed up enough to increase his speed. The rhythmic slap of his shoes on the grey tarmac was faster and more even than it had been the first time he’d taken this run all those months ago. The limp was gone, or as good as gone. He still favoured that leg a little when he was particularly tired, but that wound was healed. The invisible wounds he carried were healing too, and today they might just heal a little more.

  He quickened his pace as the first buildings came into sight. There was the school, and he could see a familiar figure on the oval. He slowed as he approached the gate then effortlessly vaulted over it, landing solidly on both legs just as the jogger at the far side of the oval turned the corner and saw him. Without breaking stride, he crossed the oval and fell into step beside Meg.

  She glanced sideways and smiled, but said nothing. Together they completed the circuit and then dropped to a cooling walk.

  Simon was the first to speak. ‘I was hoping I’d find you here.’

  ‘I knew you would. Welcome back.’

  ‘Thank you.’

  There was no news to exchange—they’d kept in close contact during Simon’s absence. Meg knew about the new ringmaster who was now leading the circus on its travels. She knew that Finn’s new act incorporating his motorcycle stunts was a huge hit with audiences. No doubt Jenny had told her even more about that than Simon had. The kids remained close, thanks to the mobile phone that Finn now carried. In their own long phone conversations, Meg had listened to Simon’s plans to manage the circus from Nyringa and spend his time restoring vintage circus rides. He also wanted to start circus camps for schools too, teaching basic circus skills. Meg was going to help him with that. It was a very different future from the one he’d planned the day he and Michelle had joined the circus. But it was a good future. He knew Michelle would have approved.

  Simon glanced at his watch. ‘It’s after eight, I should be going. I’m not supposed to be on school grounds this late.’ He softened the words with a smile.

  ‘But it’s Saturday. There’s no school today.’

  ‘So it is. I guess it’s all right then, if I have the teacher’s permission.’

  Meg chuckled. ‘Have you had breakfast?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Would you like some?’

  ‘Yes. Please. I’m starving. Then, as it’s Saturday, I was hoping you might have time to come out to Three Rings. I want to get the dust cleared away from the carousel and start working on her again. I think it’s time she went on the road. There are kids out there just waiting for her.’

  ‘I’d enjoy that. I’ve found some new images of Victorian fairs. I think they’ll be useful.’

  ‘Great.’

  They had reached the gate. Simon opened it to let Meg go through. She glanced around quickly. The school ground was deserted except for them. She leaned forward and kissed Simon on the cheek.

  ‘Welcome home.’

  They carefully closed the gate behind them and Simon reached for Meg’s hand. Her fingers entwined with his.

  ‘Since you’ve been gone, the bakery has started doing rea
lly good croissants,’ Meg told him. ‘But I’m afraid all I can offer you for breakfast is eggs on toast.’

  ‘That sounds good to me.’

  They walked along the path to Meg’s little cottage. As they climbed the stairs and went in for breakfast, Simon noted the door wasn’t locked any more.

  CHAPTER

  38

  When the new clock on her mantel told her it was almost time for afternoon tea, Alice collected the cake tin from the kitchen and her car keys. She wasn’t wearing her good navy blue dress and she left her best handbag on the table in the hallway. She didn’t need the formal trappings of a ‘visit’ today. After making sure the cake was safely settled on the passenger seat, she got behind the wheel of the car. The little white Honda wasn’t quite as pristine as it had once been: there was a thin layer of dust on it from sitting in the driveway rather than in the garage. It was just easier to have it out now that she was driving most days. The car started without hesitation. It hadn’t missed a beat these past few weeks.

  As she drove the one block to the main road, Alice saw two figures walking towards the creek. Jenny and her cousin Kate. Jenny still talked about Finn a lot. They had stayed in touch and she was very excited about how well he was doing in the circus, now he was free of his father’s fists. That was nice. Alice wasn’t sure if their feelings would stay the same. Maybe they would. Or maybe there would be broken hearts ahead for one or both of them. Still, that was what being a teenager was all about. At least they had the courage to try. She would never want Jenny to have the same regrets she had carried all these years.

  She turned onto the main road in the direction of Three Rings, driving at her accustomed pace, quite happy to let those people who were in a hurry overtake her. She ignored the impatient hoots of a horn. This was her town, and she’d drive at the speed she wanted.

  Barbara Harden had rung yesterday to invite Alice to attend church with her and Peter and Jenny. Lunch would follow, of course. Barbara seemed to have found herself since that terrible night they had all been so afraid for Jenny. She had actually become quite good company now that she was more assertive and had real opinions of her own. And of course she had always made a good Sunday lunch. Father Phil was away on holidays again. That seemed a lot of holidays for a priest to be taking. But Alice was getting used to his replacement. Father Brian wasn’t really too bad. His sermon last time on respecting one’s elders had been quite good. She might suggest he talk about the importance of families next time. That always made for a good sermon.

  She pulled up in front of the real estate agency. Before she could get out of the car, Peter hurried out to greet her.

  ‘Aunt Alice, lovely to see you out and about.’

  ‘Thank you. I just thought I’d drop by and say I’ll be ready for you to pick me up for church at nine o’clock on Sunday.’

  ‘Oh. I thought now you were driving—’

  ‘I wouldn’t drive to church. That wouldn’t be right. And besides, I don’t want to miss one of your wonderful family lunches, now do I?’

  ‘No, Aunt Alice. Of course not.’

  ‘Good. Well, I’ll see you on Sunday morning.’ As she drove away, Alice looked in the rear-view mirror and chuckled.

  Arriving at Three Rings, she wasn’t at all surprised to see another car already parked near one of the sheds. Alice did not expect to find Meg in the house. Or Simon either. She imagined the two of them were happily working on that old carousel. Or perhaps not working on the old carousel. They had been apart for several weeks and absence does make the heart grow fonder. Or maybe, in their case, it makes the heart grow braver. She wasn’t one to meddle, but she had a feeling those two would be spending a lot of time together while Simon was in town. She even wondered if perhaps the school would have to start looking for a new teacher if Simon went back on the road.

  And he might. However much he said he wanted to stay in town and look after his grandmother, this wasn’t the place for a young man with an adventurous spirit. He belonged with his troupe. And it was likely that a teacher would be a useful addition to a travelling circus. After all, there were kids there too and kids always needed a teacher.

  She heard a friendly noise from the nearest paddock and walked over. The grey mare was there with her new companions. One was a lovely chestnut gelding with roughly the same amount of grey around his eyes as Alice had in her hair.

  ‘Hello, Sunny.’ Alice rubbed the horse’s face, wondering, not for the first time, what her family would say if they knew she’d bought a horse. Jenny would approve, she was sure, although Peter most certainly would not. Not that he had any say in the matter. She hadn’t started riding Sunny just yet. Lucienne would be giving her lessons, now she was home. Alice suspected that she would discover that, even after all these years, she still enjoyed being on horseback.

  And why shouldn’t she? Queen Elizabeth rode her horse well into her eighties. Maybe even her nineties. What she did, Alice could certainly also do. Any day now, she and Lucienne might just ride into town and give everyone a bit of a shock. She chuckled again. That would be fun. She should suggest it.

  Alice left the horses and retrieved the cake tin from the car. Careful not to disturb the contents, she carried it up the stairs and knocked on the door. Lucienne opened it and gestured for her to enter. The two women walked through to the kitchen, where Alice carefully placed her cake on the table on top of an inexpertly knitted placemat, of which she had the twin. She suspected Meg’s knitting might take second place to the carousel now, which was probably a good thing.

  Lucienne fiddled with her coffee maker for a couple of minutes and returned to the table with two steaming cups and two small plates she’d taken from a nearby cupboard.

  Alice had already found a knife in a kitchen drawer. She lifted the lid off the cake container. ‘Voilà,’ she said in a terrible French accent.

  ‘Jeez, that looks beaut,’ Lucienne replied in an equally appalling Australian accent, and they laughed. Alice cut two slices of her special double-layer chocolate cake with plum jam in the middle and vanilla icing on top. Lucienne slid a cup of coffee towards her, and the two friends sat down at the table to exchange the latest news.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  This story began to form in my mind while standing in a slightly rundown fairground in Spain. It grew when, the next night, I saw a carousel on a beach. My husband John was with me when all this happened—and was ever so patient while I interrupted our holiday to write notes as I got to know my characters. John, good things seem to happen a lot when you are around. That’s one of the reasons I love you.

  The matriarchs in this book are inspired by the strong, smart, caring, beautiful women who are my friends … you all know who you are. You are a constant source of inspiration and support and my life is so much richer because of you.

  I write the stories, but the book you hold is the result of teamwork. Thank you to the brilliant team at Harlequin for turning my story into this wonderful book, of which I am absurdly proud.

  Thank you to my agent Julia Silk, who never believes me when I say … ‘This book is rubbish.’ You have been right every time—and long may that continue.

  And my final words are for you, dear reader. In our busy lives, it seems to me our most precious commodity is time. You have taken time to read my story, and for that, I thank you. I do hope you enjoyed your visit to my world.

  Janet

  CHAPTER

  1

  Elizabeth Lawson never cried. Never.

  She could remember the last time she’d cried. It was four days after her eighteenth birthday, and not all that far from where she now sat at the wheel of her tractor. That was just over fifteen years ago and in all those years, she had not shed so much as a single tear.

  But today … today it was hard.

  A drop of moisture fell onto the black steering wheel, fading as it dried instantly in the late morning heat. Sweat, she told herself firmly. It was sweat. One of these days, she’d
buy a new tractor with an air-conditioned cab. But that was pretty unlikely. New tractors cost money, and money was something she didn’t have. She was even less likely to have it after today.

  Liz jammed the hat back on her short dark hair and reached for the ignition. There was nothing wrong with the tractor she had. It had a few years on it, but it was reliable and exactly what she needed to cultivate lucerne on the river flats or cart hay or shift muck from the stables.

  Today it was exactly what she needed to dig a grave big enough to bury a horse.

  She blinked furiously. It was only the dust in her eyes. She closed her work-roughened hands firmly around the control levers, and started pushing the loose soil into the hole, covering the dark shape that lay there.

  It was well past midday when Liz parked the tractor in the machinery shed. As always, her first thought was for her horses. Some needed feeding, others hadn’t been exercised. She also had to clear out the stallion stall, which was now empty. She slumped against the tractor. She really didn’t want to face that empty stall right now.

  And it looked like she wouldn’t have to. Her eyes narrowed as she watched a car approaching up the long gravel drive trailing a small cloud of dust. It stopped by the homestead and the driver got out. He was carrying a briefcase. That was not a good sign. He paused for a few moments, looking up at the building in front of him. Liz knew he wouldn’t be seeing the beautiful lines and proportions of the historic building, with its wide verandas and arched windows. Nor would he be admiring the grace of the wrought-iron railings or the elegance of the fountain in the centre of the circular drive. All he would see was the flaking paint and the stains on the stone. That’s all everyone saw now. Everyone except Liz.