A Cowboy for Christmas

by Susan Fisher-Davis

  “I named him Buttons. Do you like that, Reid?”

  “I do. That’s a good name for him,” he told the boy as they entered the barn.

  “I want to ride a bull someday like my daddy did,” Zeke said gazing up at him.

  “No, you don’t. I don’t want you to do that to your mom. She doesn’t like the bulls.” Knowing how she felt about bull riding was what kept him from telling her his plans.

  “But I want to be in the rodeo.” Zeke’s bottom lip quivered.

  “You can barrel ride. That’s a good sport and fun too.”

  “Okay.” Zeke clapped his hands. “Will you teach me?”

  The time had come. The moment he’d been dreading. Reid ran his hand down his face. “I...we’ll see.”

  “You can come live with us and be my daddy.”

  Fuck! “Zeke, it’s not that easy. I’m not your daddy and I have a home in another town. In fact, I’ve got to go home very soon.”

  “No! I want you to stay with us. You have to stay.” Zeke wrapped his arms around Reid’s legs. “I love you, Reid.”

  Reid picked him up and held him while he cried. Son of a bitch! He never should’ve allowed the boy to get so attached to him, but then he was just as bad. Hearing Zeke sob against his shoulder was tearing his heart out.

  “I love you too, and we’ll visit with each other,” Reid whispered as he held the boy close. “Hey, Z-man, what do you say we go in and get some hot chocolate?”

  Zeke raised his head and seeing the tears on his face just about brought Reid’s tears to the surface. He sighed with relief when Zeke nodded. Reid carried him to the house but when he entered the kitchen with the boy in his arms, Lucy frowned at him when she saw the tear stains on Zeke’s face.

  “Is everything all right?” she asked him crossing the room to them.

  Reid couldn’t answer her. He knew it was going to hurt just as much to tell her he was leaving but he couldn’t help but wonder if she’d have the same reaction as Zeke. Or not.

  “Mama...Reid is leaving us,” Zeke cried as he reached for her.

  Lucy took Zeke into her arms and cradled him to her even as she glared at Reid, her eyes starting to glisten. “When?”

  Her voice wasn’t much louder than a whisper. He shook his head. She held Zeke until he pushed away and wanted down. Reid watched the boy run from the room.

  “You knew I was leaving. Can we talk about this later? Please.”

  “When?” Her eyes blinked as if fighting back tears. He was hurting her. She cared enough that he was hurting her. His heart was torn between being happy that she cared and breaking her heart. He didn’t want to hurt her so perhaps if they discussed this calmly, they could figure things out.

  “Tomorrow.” Reid ran his hand along his jaw. “Something’s come up...”

  “You’re leaving tomorrow, and I’m just now hearing about it?”

  “Actually, I’ve already extended my stay, Lucy.”

  “Then why can’t you stay a bit longer. Is there a problem at your farm?”

  “No.”

  “Reid, it’s like pulling teeth with you. If there’s nothing wrong, why can’t you stay a while longer? Or is that you just don’t want to be here any longer?” Tears filled her eyes now.

  He strode to her but she stepped back, feeling like a slap. “No. Absolutely not, this has nothing to do with you or Zeke or me wanting to be here. I’ve loved being here with you both. There’s just something I need to do...”

  “What?”

  “I’d rather not say right now.”

  She gasped, and her eyes widened allowing a tear to slide down her cheek. “You’re going to Vegas aren’t you? You’re going to the tribute for Zeke.”

  “How do you know about that?”

  Lucy marched away from him, down the hallway. She returned minutes later with a letter in her hand. She thrust it at him. “They asked me to be there. I won’t go. I refuse to go watch a tribute to my dead husband.”

  “He was a great bull rider. They do this sometimes to honor them.”

  “Them? Meaning men like Zeke who died in that sport? Well, I won’t be a part of it.”

  “Well, I am going. I think it’s great they’re doing this for him, and I want to be a part of it.”

  “Are you riding?” When he didn’t answer, she shoved him. “Is that why you’re going home early...so you can prepare to try to kill yourself? Well, go then! Get out!”

  Tears streamed down her cheeks even through her anger. He wanted to tell her he’d be fine.

  “Lucy, please hear me out...”

  “Get out,” she screamed at him. “If you go there and ride, don’t ever plan on coming back here.” She shook her head when he reached for her.

  “Lucy, I love you...” The slap she delivered to the side of his face stopped his plea.

  “You don’t, Reid. If you did, you wouldn’t do this.”

  He grasped her arms and shook her. “Is this what you did to Zeke? Did you tell him not to come back if he went? Because if you did then you’re right, it was your fault. Giving an ultimatum like that feels like a knife to the heart, so you’re as guilty of killing him as that bull.” He watched as the blood drained from her face as she stared up at him. “Shit. Lucy, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”

  Her face went hard when she pushed away from him. “It doesn’t matter. Just leave. We’ll be fine without you.”

  Reid stared at her and watched her swipe at her tears. “I have to be there. This is for Zeke. You should be there too. It’s an honor. It will be four years, Lucy. You could show up for that. Do it for Zeke, and your son.”

  “I won’t. Get out,” she hissed low without looking at him. He knew she meant it.

  Reid turned to go and saw Zeke standing in the hallway. His face was white except for the redness of his eyes. Tears rolled down his cheeks and his chest shuddered under a sob. He turned and ran back down the hallway. Reid made a move to go after him but Lucy stepped in front of him.

  “No! That is my son and I will take care of him. You have finally worn out your welcome, Reid Callahan. But know this...I love you, but I’ll learn to live without you. I should be used to living without the man I love by now.” She walked away from him and headed to her son’s bedroom.

  Torn between doing something he feels so honor bound to do, and giving it up for Lucy and Zeke was ripping Reid’s heart apart. She didn’t understand but he hoped she would someday. It might be too late for him but maybe she’d open her heart and mind later to benefit her son.

  He picked up his Stetson, put it on his head, and walked out slamming the kitchen door behind him. He drove to his parents’ home to spend his last evening in town with family. Tomorrow morning, he’d be on his way home to prepare for one last ride. He only hoped it was worth what he’d just lost.

  Chapter Eight

  REID WALKED THROUGH the arena, the sounds, and smells bringing back memories of good times, and bad. Several cowboys stopped him, shaking his hand, and welcoming him back. It was like coming home, only it wasn’t. His best friend wasn’t here, and home wasn’t here anymore either. It was with Lucy and Zeke. He missed them already and only a month had passed since he’d seen them last. He shook his head. He’d thrown Zeke in her face yet she still told him she loved him. He wished she understood how important this was to him, to her husband and his friend’s memory.

  You’re one crazy son of a bitch, Callahan. Had he thrown away the best thing ever to happen to him?

  He heard his name called and he turned to see an old friend coming toward him. “Hey, Reid, how the hell are you? I heard you were going to be here. It’s good to see you, man.”

  Lucian Black stuck his hand out to him.

  “Good to see you, Luc. How have you been?”

  “Great. I got married last summer.”

  “You? I never thought I’d see that.”

  Lucian laughed, slapping Reid on the shoulder. “What can I say? She won my heart.”

&
nbsp; “Is she here? I’d love to meet the woman who stole your heart.”

  “Oh hell, no way...I’m not introducing her to you. She’s mentioned too many times how hot she thinks you are.” Lucian looked him up and down. “Damned if I see it though.”

  Reid laughed. “Is she all right with you riding?”

  “Yes, but I’m retiring the end of this year. I’m done. Getting too old for this shit.”

  “I hear ya. I feel the same way.”

  “So I hear you’re riding...what bull did you draw?”

  Reid clenched his jaw. “Firecracker.”

  “Damn. Seems fitting somehow though, doesn’t it? What better way to give tribute to your best friend then for you to ride the bull that killed him. You can do this, Reid.”

  “I’m sure as hell going to try.”

  “I heard Lucy didn’t come for this. That’s a shame.” Lucian shook his head and Reid saw the sadness in his eyes. Zeke had been well liked by all who worked the circuit.

  “No, she refused to come. She hates everything about the rodeo. I wish she was here though.”

  Lucian grinned. “I bet you do. We all know how you felt about her, Reid. You didn’t hide it very well.”

  Reid scowled at him. “Fuck you, Black.”

  Lucian laughed. “Great comeback.” He slapped Reid on the back. “Good luck, buddy.”

  Reid watched him walk away. He really did wish that Lucy were here. If for no other reason but to prove to her, he could succeed. He huffed and continued down through the arena. He ended up at the stalls in the back and headed for Firecracker’s stall. He looked in at the massive beast.

  “You and I have some unfinished business, Firecracker.” Reid stared at the bull and as if he knew what he was here to do, the animal stared right back. He pawed the ground and snorted at Reid as if to say, bring it on. “Yeah, I don’t like you either. Personally, I think you should have been hamburger by now for what you did to my best friend, but I’m going to ride your ass. You won’t win this time.”

  Reid walked out of the back and climbed up on the fence to watch the other cowboys do their best to last eight seconds on almost eighteen hundred pounds or more of angry bull. He was getting anxious. The damn butterflies in his stomach were driving him insane. He hated the nerves that always struck him before a ride but this time was altogether different. He had to ride Firecracker and he had to succeed...for Zeke. He’d ride the bull no cowboy had stayed on for the full duration. The closest anyone ever got was Zeke, at six seconds, and he’d paid the ultimate price for that time.

  Reid blew out a breath to settle his nerves. This damn bull needed to be ridden and he needed to be the man to do it.

  Later when it was finally time for his ride, Reid readied himself, pulling on his glove as they loaded Firecracker into the chute. Reid stopped to tie his chaps, and then lowered his hat down low on his forehead. As he climbed up the rails and stared down at the bull, he heard the announcer tell how Zeke Albright had ridden this beast for the record time four years ago and in tribute of his best friend’s life ending for that ride, Reid Callahan was going to ride Firecracker tonight. A roar went up in the arena while the other cowboys around him silently watched him. No one smiled or spoke as he straddled the bull. Firecracker jumped in the chute, snorting with anger, already trying to dislodge his rider.

  Reid tuned out the sights and sounds around him as he wrapped the rope around his hand. He scooched forward on Firecracker’s back and took a deep breath. He gave a terse nod to signal for the gate to be opened. This was it. For you, Zeke.

  LUCY SAT ON THE EDGE of her seat, silently praying as she watched the gate swing open. Firecracker jumped out of the chute and kicked his back legs high in the air as he tried to rid himself of Reid from his back. Time stood still, and her heart climbed into her throat as she watched the bull jump one way, and then the other. She still wasn’t sure why she came tonight except that she had to know. If he was able to do it, she wanted to be here. If the worst happened, she wanted to know it had, not hear about it later.

  She’d cried for days after Reid left and cursed herself over, and over again for pushing him away. Maybe he was more right about her and Zeke than she’d ever admitted to herself before. She’d pushed Reid from her life because he wanted to do what he loved in memory of her dead husband who’d died doing what he loved. She’d decided it was selfish of her to tell him he couldn’t ride so now she was here to see what happened when he did. If he made it through alive, she was going to apologize and try to make it up to him...if he’d let her.

  With the crowd cheering, Reid stayed on with his arm high in the air, his body racked from side to side, and forward to back. Firecracker spun in circles, furiously trying to throw his rider. Lucy held her breath, and when she glanced up at the clock, her belly clutched. Six seconds, he’d reached Zeke’s time but then she realized Reid was still on at seven, and then eight.

  The buzzer rang and the crowd roared. Lucy stood along with the crowd, knowing the danger wasn’t over. Reid needed to get clear of the bull. She wrung her hands as she watched as Reid untied his hand before jumping off the bull and landing on his feet. When Firecracker ran for him, Reid took off for the fence jumping it before the bull rammed it. He did it!

  The other cowboys surrounded Reid, slapping him on the back with congratulations while the rodeo clowns corralled Firecracker from the arena. Reid hopped back over the fence now that it was safe, ran to the center of the floor, and threw his hat up in the air. He raised his hands in the air and looked up at the ceiling then he dropped to one knee, and hung his head as if in prayer. Lucy wondered if he was talking to Zeke. Tears ran down Lucy’s face as she applauded along with the entire arena as he took a few more bows and accepted the crowd’s ovation.

  She moved from her seat and ran down the metal stairs to the back of the arena. She needed to see him, to acknowledge what he’d done and why. She needed to see him to make sure he really was okay. When she found Reid, cowboys and buckle bunnies surrounded him. A couple of the gals were already trying to gain his attention to boost their own.

  Oh hell no! Not going to happen!

  Lucy made her way through the crowd and when she was close enough, said his name. He spun around and stared at her, his eyes wide as if he thought he was seeing things. She smiled.

  “Lucy?” He started toward her, and everyone parted to let him get to her.

  “You did it.” Her heart was pounding in her chest and she wanted to throw herself into his arms but didn’t dare...not after the way she’d treated him.

  “I...yes, I did,” he said with a proud grin. “What are you doing here?”

  “I had to see, Reid. I just had to know. I had to see you do it.”

  Reid pulled her into his arms, kissed her, and held onto her as if his life depended on it. She knew hers did. She wrapped her arms around his waist and cried against his shoulder.

  “I’m so sorry,” she exclaimed, her voice hoarse and cracking through sobs. “I shouldn’t have said the things I did. I’m sorry I slapped you.”

  “It’s all right. We both said things we shouldn’t have.” He pulled back from her and cupped her face in his hands. “But I meant one of those things, Lucy. I love you. I love you so much...you and Zeke. I want to marry you, and the three of us be a family. I’ll keep my farm and let someone else run it so Zeke always knows where home is and we can go there once in a while for visits.”

  “I want that too...sounds perfect,” she whispered.

  Reid leaned down and kissed her. Applause erupted around them. Lucy glanced around, having forgotten where they were. All the cowboys and even the buckle bunnies were clapping and cheering. She smiled, feeling a blush spread over her face. “I think they approve.”

  Reid laughed and nodded. “That’s all we need then, right?” He kissed her forehead. “Let’s go home. This was my last ride, and that’s a promise.”

  Lucy hugged him. “If you’re sure.”

  “I’m posi
tive, darlin’. Nothing is as important to me as you and Zeke, and whatever our future brings us...” He leaned down close. “I’m going to enjoy working on siblings for our boy.”

  She grinned up at him. She liked him thinking of Zeke as their son. “You are a naughty cowboy but I do love you, Reid Callahan. Let’s go home.”

  REID STARED DOWN AT the headstone then took his hat off, and squatted down. He spun the brim in his hand. He took a deep breath and blew it out making a puff of air in front of him.

  “Hey, buddy. I still miss you. I’m not sure if you can hear me, but I have to talk to you. I’m...I’m in love with Lucy and Zeke. I want them to be my family. I promise you that I’ll take care of them for the rest of my days.” He glanced up at the gray skies. “I rode that son of a bitch, Zeke. I rode Firecracker the full eight seconds. I heard they’re retiring him. I went out a winner and he went out a loser. I just wish it had been you.” He stood but didn’t leave. He glanced around the cemetery. He was the only one out here on such a cold, dreary February day. Flurries flew around him and the wind howled. He had to be here though. He needed to talk to Zeke.

  “I’ve asked Lucy to marry me, Zeke. I’ve always loved her but I need your blessing, buddy. I have to know you’re all right with this. Of course, I have no idea how you’re going to let me know. Lucy deserves to be happy, and I promise I can make her and Zeke happy.” Reid grinned thinking how she’d told him he was the best present she’d ever received—a cowboy for Christmas.

  “How can you let me know you’re fine with this? Damn, Zeke. I promise I’ll be good to her and Z-man. I didn’t think I could ever love two people so much. They’re my life. Come on, Zeke. Let me know, somehow.” He stood there staring at the headstone not really expecting any kind of answer when all of a sudden, the clouds parted, and a sliver of sunlight shone down on the headstone then moved over Reid. A shiver as if someone had passed by him made him look up. He grinned, put his hat on, and tapped the brim. “Thanks, Zeke.”