Into the Gray

by Geanna Culbertson

  I whistled. “Dang. I thought I had plenty with two older brothers growing up. That must’ve been rough.”

  “You have no idea,” Chance said a bit wearily. Then he recovered from whatever unpleasantness had crossed his mind and spoke with a more upbeat tone. “Overall it has its pluses and its minuses. You’re never alone, but then you’re never alone. It makes for some . . . lively family dinners when I’m home for the summer. But Lord Channing’s has been a good place for me for several years because I’m the only Darling there right now. The triplets will start at Lady Agnue’s in the fall, but for a while, this world of school and protagonist training has been my place of solace. My peace.”

  “It’s mine too,” I admitted. “Lady Agnue and Mauvrey may have gotten on my nerves over the years, but with SJ, Blue, and Jason, I always had a reason to be happy. For as long as I can remember, being in my actual home has been a minefield. My relationship with my dad is tricky, and my mom has a very different personality from me. My eldest brother Pietro has always tried to overprotect me, and my other brother Alex was the perfect prince that occupied my parents’ attention until . . .”

  I didn’t feel the need to finish. Chance knew about Alex, as did all my good friends. When my original crew and I returned from our Excalibur quest, we filled them in on the full truth about our exploits and what was at stake with the realm. Still, the Alex subject wasn’t something I broached in casual conversation. I must’ve felt really comfortable around Chance, despite the anxiety involved with this date.

  “You haven’t heard from him since you purged the Shadow he was carrying?” Chance asked carefully.

  “No. And I don’t want to.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “Because he’s not my brother anymore.” I gazed out at the water and sighed—answering Chance’s question, but also thinking out loud. “I’m not sure if getting rid of the Shadow restored any of his humanity. I hope it did, but either way, it can’t fix what’s already been done. Honestly, I think it would be simpler if I never saw him again. I have friends, family, and enemies. I don’t have time for someone who blurs the lines between all three.”

  “So even if he tried to be good again, you would never forgive him?”

  I thought on it then shook my head. “No. Forgiveness is a luxury for people who can afford to make mistakes. I’m not one of those people anymore.”

  “Haven’t you made mistakes, though?” Chance replied. “Haven’t you ever asked for forgiveness from someone you’ve wronged?”

  “I have,” I said. “But I never hurt anyone intentionally. Alex made the decision to attack Midveil castle with the intention of killing the protagonists inside. When he attacked my friends and worked for the antagonists, he knew exactly what he was doing. He didn’t make choices that unintentionally unleashed wickedness; he made wicked choices.”

  Silence again.

  “I’m sorry I brought it up,” Chance said eventually.

  I sat forward and looked at him with sincerity. “Don’t be. The topic doesn’t upset me; it just makes me a little sad. But there is a silver lining to this.”

  Chance tilted his head. “What’s that?”

  “I think this is the longest, most real conversation you and I have ever had.”

  Chance smiled. “How was it for you?”

  I smiled back. “I wasn’t opposed to it.”

  For a brief moment the violins, drums, and harpsichords we’d been hearing seemed to quiet. It was like Chance and I were contained in a bubble, a world all our own. Then the boat ground against the bank and the bubble popped.

  All around us, couples disembarked excitedly. Chance put down his oars, hopped out of our boat, and offered me his hand. I allowed him to help me out as a courtesy, though once I was on the bank he did not let go and kept holding on as we headed for the castle’s main entrance.

  His hand was slightly cold, but it spread a warmth through my body that I couldn’t explain. I didn’t dislike it, but it felt weird. A ripple went through my stomach that took my breath away. When we reached the front door of the palace I delicately pulled my hand back, feigning the need to tuck my hair behind my ear. That was enough of that for now.

  Though Chance tried not to visibly react to my withdrawal, I could tell he was a little bummed. I felt bad; but I’d held out as long as I could. This was all very new for me. I was seventeen and a half, and that meant I was growing up, but I wasn’t ready for it the way others might’ve been—holding hands with guys, touching guys, kissing guys. It should’ve come naturally, but it didn’t. Chance was handsome. I liked him. But I felt so out of my comfort zone it made me question if I was rushing into something I wasn’t ready for.

  I was a kid and acted like a girl; the idea of being an adult and acting like a woman gave me an awkward taste in my mouth. I didn’t even like saying the word.

  Woman.

  Becoming one was as foreign a concept as transforming into a goose.

  Fortunately, I didn’t have to dwell on the matter right now—the emerald green main doors to the palace beckoned. They were over fifteen feet high and covered with a type of ivy I’d once learned was called Creeping Charlie. Its fuzzy green foliage with scalloped leaves hung from balconies, clung to turrets, draped from windows, and crawled along walls of the castle.

  Alongside the other couples we were welcomed into a foyer that was part garden, part enchanted dream. White flowers dangled from the ceiling. Lustrous mirrored walls edged with bright moss surrounded us. The floor was black-and-white checkered tile, but grass and bunches of flowers spewed out of fissures all across it. White cranes with sapphire crests on their foreheads strutted about. The air was filled with glitter. Like actual glitter. It floated through the atmosphere like dust particles and stuck to our hair and clothes.

  Our procession of couples proceeded through the magical place, following the music until we arrived at its source. Two enormous golden doors splayed open to grant us entry to the ballroom and the amazing affair we’d been journeying toward.

  Whoa again.

  I’d been to a lot of balls, but this was something different. The room was so massive I could not see the other side. Everywhere I looked, people in fine suits and gorgeous gowns spun across the gray marble floor. And I mean everywhere—in the space above, maybe thirty feet up, more couples danced in the air. These must’ve been the castle ghosts. They looked like royalty—the men wore old-fashioned powdered wigs and the ladies had high hairstyles adorned with flowers.

  Like the golden birds I’d seen flying across the night sky, as these ghosts twirled in the air they kicked up shimmering dust—the source of the glitter we’d been seeing. Its gleaming haze made the whole upper half of the ballroom splendid and disorienting.

  Off to the side of the dance floor alcoves offered places for couples to mix and mingle. Against the left maroon wall a full-service bar was packed with action. Tall tables were set up in the area for people to talk and laugh and eagerly accept food that waiters brought around.

  “You want to start there?” Chance asked, tilting his chin toward the food servers.

  I grinned. “You read my mind.”

  My partner and I headed to a table dressed in a floor-length maroon tablecloth with a tall crystal vase at the center overflowing with Creeping Charlie.

  “I’m going to get us something to drink,” Chance said. “Cereus said they make some mean house-specialty beverages.”

  “Actually, I’m okay,” I said.

  “My older siblings told me they no longer serve the dance-til-you-die potion, if that’s what you’re worried about,” he said. “They’ve been here a bunch of times.”

  “Better safe than sorry,” I replied. “I’m pretty sure the bartenders are ghosts and I don’t know how they roll.”

  “Fair enough,” Chance said. Then he smiled roguishly. “But the waiters are probably ghosts too. How do you know you can eat what they’re serving?”

  He was challenging me and I liked it.
“Because,” I said, “I know food. And that waiter who just floated by was carrying bite-size churros. The day my nose can’t recognize a good dessert is the day I have officially lost my touch.”

  “All right,” Chance said. “You eat everything you like and if you’re wrong and the churros are enchanted, then I promise to break any spell that comes over you before we head home.”

  “Okay,” I responded. “And since you’re thirsty, you can drink the house-specialty offerings and I’ll make sure to save you if something goes wrong too.”

  Chance outstretched his hand. “We save each other.”

  “We save each other.” I took his hand and shook it.

  “I’ll be right back then,” Chance said. “Don’t go dancing with any other princes dressed to the nines while I’m gone.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Why would I do that when I’m already with a guy who’s a ten?”

  I was surprised that those words came out of my mouth, but the statement was true so why the heck not voice it? Chance was ridiculously handsome, a prince, and behaving like the most polite and charming guy you could ask for. He’d been nothing but honest since he’d endeavored to date me; I figured it wouldn’t hurt to reward him with a compliment that was just as truthful.

  However, understandably the comment caught him off guard. I’d never said such a thing to him before. His mouth gaped, but nothing came out, and a blush crept into his cheeks. Chance pulled away from the table, did a double take at me, then swiftly headed through the crowds to the bar. His speechlessness was adorable.

  While Chance was away, I admired the dazzling surroundings. So many immaculate people and jewels and decorations filled the arena of pleasure that it was almost too much to handle. My eyes scanned the area in a daze until I was shocked to spot a familiar face. Two familiar faces actually.

  Beneath the shadow of a golden female statue draped in ancient robes, a man and a lady toasted their goblets together. My eyes broadened with disbelief.

  No way.

  Forgetting my date, I bobbed and weaved between couples and waiters until I was in the perfect position to sneak up on the pair. I slid up to the man’s right side and seized his arm.

  “Surprise!”

  My eldest brother Pietro, dressed in a handsome black velvet blazer, nearly dropped his drink. His dark brown eyes filled with shock and joy. “Crisa! What are you doing here?”

  “I’m on a date. Same as you, evidently.” I gestured to Evette Black, the lady at Pietro’s side. Evette had started living with Pietro at our castle in Midveil while it was being rebuilt following the commons rebellion attack. Last week, he’d called me on my Mark Two to say that the reconstruction was complete and my parents had finally left the Darling’s castle where they’d been staying and moved back in. He also told me that my parents had given permission for Evette to continue living there for the foreseeable future. Things were seriously getting serious between them.

  I was glad for him. He deserved a happily ever after like the finest princes in storybooks, even if he technically wasn’t one. Pietro didn’t have royal blood since he was adopted, and earlier in the semester I’d discovered he didn’t even have a protagonist book. He was one of many unknowing royals who’d had their protagonist books forged by the higher-ups. But while Pietro may not have been a prince in technicality, he was a prince where it counted—in heart. I’d learned over time that being a prince—or any kind of hero or protagonist—was about heart more than anything else. And Pietro’s was as big as the moon.

  “You are on a date?” Pietro repeated, grasping for clarity in the words.

  “It’s a shock to me too,” I admitted. I turned to his girlfriend and smiled. “Hi, Evette.”

  Evette wore a fitted mermaid gown with a strapless sweetheart neckline. The dress was made of black lace and decorated with glittering golden swirls. Her dark hair was up in a thick bun, which showed off her enormous crystal earrings. She wore long black leather gloves on her lean, muscular arms, which she wrapped around me warmly.

  “Crisa, it is so nice to see you!”

  I hugged her back with gladness, but like a lady. When she pulled away, I threw my arms around my big brother gruffly, very much not like a lady.

  Pietro embraced me with equal affection, but tried to be careful not to spill the contents of his goblet on my white silk outfit. Honestly though, he could have poured the whole drink on me and I wouldn’t have flinched. I was just thrilled to see him.

  When our hug was through, Pietro placed his cup on the pickup tray of a floating by ghost and crossed his arms. “So who is this guy you’re seeing?” he said, his voice taking on a stern, protective tone. “Someone I’ve met? Jason? Daniel?”

  “What? Ew, no,” I said. “Jason’s one of my best friends and totally into someone else and Daniel, well, same thing.”

  “They’re the only two guy classmates of yours I’ve met, so I need to meet this new hero right now. Make sure he’s worthy of my baby sister.”

  “All right, cool your engines, bro. You have met him. A long time ago anyway. It’s Chance Darling.”

  Pietro’s face contorted with bemusement. “Chance Darling? Don’t you hate him?”

  “I did,” I replied. “But we’ve become friends. I trust him and I like him. And now I guess I’m dating him? I don’t know. If things continue to go well tonight, maybe I can keep up the endeavor, see where it goes.”

  “You talk about the situation like it is a science experiment,” Evette commented, amused.

  “It kind of is,” I replied.

  “Well, get home by ten o’clock,” Pietro instructed. “You shouldn’t be out so late with a guy, no matter who he is. And if you need something, or if he doesn’t treat you kindly, or he treats you too kindly, you let me know. I have my Mark Two on me and I’ll be sure to—”

  “Pietro.” I held up my hand. “I’ve got this. Your concern is appreciated, but not needed.”

  Pietro, all worked up, was about to respond when Evette placed a hand on his tense shoulder. “She’s right, Pietro. Leave her be. She has fought monsters and villains. I am sure she can handle herself as a lady or a warrior depending on what the situation calls for.”

  My brother considered this, then softened. “You’re right, Evie. I’m sorry, Crisa. I got carried away.”

  Wow. Evette’s influence was like magic. Pietro was terribly prone to being a big-brother-bodyguard where I was concerned. It was impressive to see how he took Evette at her word and totally shifted his attitude.

  “Well, changing the subject,” Pietro said. “Tonight isn’t just a milestone in your life, what with your first date. It’s a milestone in ours too.” Pietro suddenly paused. “Wait, this is your first date, right? There haven’t been any others I should know about?”

  “Yes, Pietro,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Now what’s your milestone?”

  Pietro exchanged a loving look with Evette and took her hand. I studied their interlocked fingers. The gesture was so simple and natural, yet it felt like anything but. Through the modest act of interlacing their fingers, they radiated a message to the world that their souls were equally interlaced in the most comfortable, wonderful way. I pondered if I could ever let Chance hold my hand in such a manner without feeling the need to pull away. It seemed . . . nice.

  “Evette and I aren’t just here on a date,” Pietro said. “Mom and Dad already know and we’re making the official announcement to the kingdom on Saturday. I was going to call you tomorrow to tell you myself.”

  “Tell me what?”

  Pietro’s naturally bronzed skin glowed in the ballroom’s light, but his smile beamed even stronger. He lifted the hand that was holding onto Evette’s and I had my answer. On Evette’s finger over the glove was a large, princess-cut diamond ring, rimmed with green-and-blue opals shaped like butterfly wings.

  “You’re engaged!” I gasped.

  I processed the news in a state of astonishment for two seconds before abandoning all decoru
m and tackling them both with a singular hug. “Congratulations!”

  I pulled away quickly, too overloaded with questions to contain them. “When did it happen? How did it happen? When is the wedding going to be?”

  “Calm, calm,” Pietro said amiably. “I asked her this afternoon.”

  “We were having a picnic in the forest outside Midveil castle,” Evette explained. “Then he got down on one knee and said that he was so glad I had been his rock through everything and, given the circumstances, it seemed only right to give me a big rock in return.”

  I smiled ear to ear. “Pietro, that’s so lame.”

  Evette laughed. “Anyway, we told your parents and then my parents, and now here we are. We’re planning on a fall wedding. I love it when the leaves change, so having an outdoor ceremony at that time would be beautiful.”

  “I am so happy for you,” I said.

  “Crisa?” Chance’s voice caused me to turn around. He was carrying a goblet with a fancy iron stem in one hand, and something that looked like a mini taco in the other.

  “I thought you ran away or something,” he said, coming over to me with a look of relief.

  “That’s my mother’s move,” I replied with a grin. “And if I were going to follow in her footsteps, I’d be sure to wait until midnight.”

  “Noted,” Chance said. Then he saw who I was talking to. “Hey, Pietro. Nice to see you again. What’s it been, about three years since you came to visit our castle over the summer?” Chance combined his taco and drink in one hand so he could reach out and exchange a shake with Pietro. My brother stiffened slightly like a Rottweiler on alert, but returned the gesture.

  “And this is Evette,” I said. “She’s my brother’s fiancée.”

  “Pleasure to meet you,” Chance said, bowing formally.

  “So, you’re dating my sister,” Pietro said.

  “And that’s our cue to go,” I said, looping my arm through Chance’s. I nodded to Evette. “Congrats again. Really glad to welcome you into the family. Pietro, I’ll talk to you soon.”