Tug of War (Legacy Book 5)

by Rain Carrington

  “Move the fuck out of the way. Do you think this is helping your case with Tommy?”

  “No, but that isn’t my priority right now. I’m dealing with a life-threatening situation here, and I like to know who I’m working with. I don’t like being in these situations with people I don’t trust, and I don’t trust you. That has nothing to do with Tommy.”

  With a sarcastic smirk on his pretty face, Diego scoffed, “Sure, it doesn’t.”

  “The fact I don’t want him with someone that has secrets, yeah, that part is about him.”

  “You should talk! Your whole life is covering things up for yourself or other people. You kill people for a living and you’re questioning me?”

  All of it was completely valid. “And? See, I don’t hide any of that. My shit is out on the table. Tommy knows about it, shit, even you do. What I don’t know is how you shoot like a sniper. College boys don’t shoot like snipers. College boy.”

  Diego’s eyes changed. Gone was that bright, innocent stare he seemed to always have, and they turned deadly. Gary had seen that look many times, mostly in the mirror. The man had seen death.

  “Would you like to see how many other tricks I learned from my uncle? You’re getting really close to seeing everything in my fucking repertoire.”

  Gary laughed maliciously. “I knew it. Those years, after high school, you weren’t just traveling around, seeing the world, huh?”

  Diego’s brows shot straight up, and he whispered, “Checking up on me?”

  “Yeah. And soon I’ll know everything. You want to tell me first?”

  “What I’d really like to do is cut you into little pieces and feed them to lions at the zoo. If I didn’t love that man in the bedroom, it’s exactly what I’d do to you.”

  “I’m scared,” Gary hissed, then smiled.

  “Actually, you should be.”

  Chapter Ten

  After rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Tommy left the comfort of the bed to see if anything had happened while he was sleeping. When he got in the living room and saw the two staring each other down, reminding him of bulls ready to charge one another, he huffed, “What the fuck is going on in here now?”

  Diego was the one that answered, “Nothing, Tommy.”

  “No, no, college boy, don’t lie to him. Tell him about those years when you were in the wind! Tell him how you learned to shoot better than men trained by the best army in the world.”

  Tommy hated that they couldn’t get along even for an hour, it seemed, but Tommy was curious about what Gary was saying. “What are you talking about?”

  Moving from Gary, Diego turned his back on the both of them. “Fuck!”

  Gary gritted, “I fucking knew it.”

  “Knew what, Gary? What the fuck gave you the right to check up on him?”

  Spinning to face him, Gary pled, “Tommy, please, I am worried about you, that’s it. And I’m worried about who we’re putting our life on the line for. What if this fucker has some ties to these people?”

  Before Tommy could say a thing to all that, Diego said, without turning, “Not likely. They’re the wrong color for my old associates.”

  Feeling his entire body grow cold, Tommy stared at the back of his head and tried to find the words that Gary found easily. “What’s that mean?”

  Diego finally faced them and nodded to the couch. “You might want to sit down for this. Tom, if you want me gone after, I won’t blame you.”

  He couldn’t imagine what Diego would have to confess that would cause him to leave, but he sat with Gary on the couch and shoved his hands between his thighs to keep them from shaking. “What’s going on, Diego?”

  Diego sat in front of them on the coffee table, but he wouldn’t meet their eyes. Gary was anxious, his leg bouncing, and Tommy wanted to punch him for it. He was excited that his competition might be swept away without a fight.

  “Fuck, I never wanted anyone to know about this. I’m…I’m ashamed. It was a part of my life I’d change if I could.”

  “We all have those moments,” Gary said in a surprise statement. His voice was nearly sympathetic. “Go on.”

  Diego looked up at him, confused, and Gary’s words seemed to help him go on easier. “Yeah, but this isn’t taking my dad’s car without permission or cheating on some test. I was involved in a militia.”

  Groaning, Gary turned his head away from Tommy, and Tommy sat, more confused than ever. “What does that mean, exactly? What kind of militia?”

  “The worst kind, Tom. See, my uncle was special forces in the Army, airborne ranger, to be exact. He was proud, did everything his country asked of him, but they did things to him that made him sick. Chemicals, something in the shots they gave him before he traveled overseas, he had a million theories. It turned him a little crazy, but he was my uncle and my idol. The guy was so tough, big, strong. My dad, see, he was quiet, reasonable. A young kid like I was when Uncle Lem came out of the army? I wanted to be just like him.

  “He, uh, didn’t trust the government after that, of course. He got involved with some guys that led him straight for this militia in Montana. They had this compound and Uncle Lem went there to live. My parents, they didn’t know about those things, and they let me go there to visit the summers after my sophomore and junior years in high school.”

  “Bad idea,” Gary said, finally looking back at Diego. “I suppose it wasn’t just the government they hated, by the way you spoke earlier.”

  “Of course not. Anyone of color was the enemy. With Lem’s last name, he had to prove he was from Europe and not some country in central or south America. Once he did, though, he rose to the top ranks of the group and they started planning some bad shit. Starting small, they hurt people, Muslims, blacks, Latinos, anyone that they felt were a threat to them and their way of life. They believed that the US was a white country and for it to be perfect, they had to rid it of the minorities that had fucked it up.”

  Tommy felt sick to his stomach. “Including gay people. Your uncle didn’t know about you, did he?”

  “No. They were all about the bible and their guns. I knew better than to let on about my sexuality. They got to me, though, those summers. So much so that I joined up with them as soon as I finished high school. My parents wanted me to go to college, but Uncle Lem talked me out of it. He said they’d fill my head with lies, rewrite the good white history of this country. I was sucked into all of it, but really, I didn’t know. I thought it was all talk and they just wanted to live apart of the rest of society, training for the third world war. It was exciting and I was good at nearly everything they trained me to do, like shooting.”

  “When did you finally see it wasn’t right?”

  Diego looked to Gary and confessed, “When I went with them one night and they caught a Muslim man, beat him, and left him for dead in the woods. It became real for me then. I knew I couldn’t just walk away, either. We were a hundred miles from anything, and only certain people could leave the compound without permission. I had to wait and bide my time. It was a year before I got the chance to leave.”

  Tommy knew he’d throw up if he heard more, but the more Diego went on, the easier it seemed for him. Supporting him was important for Tommy, though his words were hard to hear.

  “I saw their hypocrisy daily. They hated the Muslims, thought they wanted to enact their laws into the US. The thing was, they wanted to do the same. They wanted the bible to be the law of the land. Guns, bibles, and to overthrow the government and make their own. It was pathetic. Kids being taught to shoot barely after they could walk, no real schooling, only biblical and anti-government classes. Women were second-class citizens but none seemed to notice or mind! It was a hard lesson, but I learned it, and once I had my chance to leave I did and never looked back.

  “I got home and started college. I wanted to be skeptical of everything they were teaching, but I did my own research. I spoke to people of color, hearing their experiences. I…I was so ashamed; I swore it would go with me
to the grave.”

  Tommy turned his head to Gary, who looked sick himself. Sick with guilt. “I’m sorry, Diego, and I think Gary is, too. You were young and stupid. I mean, shit, you’re in good company. I followed a guy I thought was my best friend, a guy who I was in love with, even though he treated me like dog shit. I let him talk me into being a fucking thief, putting my freedom on the line just to please him.”

  Gary piped in, “And I became a fucking mercenary. If two people would understand, I think you’re looking at them. I’m sorry. I had to know, though. I hope you can understand that.”

  “You were looking out for Tommy. I can appreciate that.”

  The ice began to melt in the room between the two men. Tommy was amazed at that, a horrible confession and it seemed to bring them closer. Gary, for the first time, likely saw him as more of an equal. He’d been envious of Diego for having this charmed life, he knew. College, parents that had stayed together and happy, money…but in reality, he’d gone through things he wanted to forget, just like Gary had.

  Gary rose from the couch, and surprised them both again by laying a hand on Diego’s shoulder and whispering, “Sorry, man.”

  Tommy followed him out of the room after kissing Diego’s cheek and telling him to wait there. Gary went into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bottom bunk. “Gary, are you okay?”

  “I fucked up. I was so sure. And I was right, but…fuck, Tommy. Just choose him already, once and for all. He’s the better choice, you know he is.”

  He sat next to him and admitted, “I was thinking the opposite. You’ve always been honest with me, except when you left and didn’t tell me the real reason. Then, you were so worried about me picking him, and his secrets, you did something that could have very well have blown up in your face. I could be really pissed at you, but I know why you did it. He lied to me, and I know why, sure, but he did.”

  “Don’t, Tommy. He did have a good reason. You wouldn’t want to admit that shit to anyone, either. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing here, Tommy.”

  He took Gary’s hand, and, in his most sincere voice, he confirmed, “You’re here because I love you. I never stopped. I’m sorry I love two guys, but I do. I’m the one that feels fucked up for it. You have no reason to.”

  “You’re too damn good for either of us, Tommy.”

  “Yeah, but that doesn’t change anything,” he teased, grinning wildly.

  Gary’s phone rang and he answered, “Yeah.”

  As he listened, he was nodding and then he assured, “We’ll be out of here in two hours. Clear the way for us.”

  Tommy sighed, knowing they’d be running again, so when Gary ended the call, he asked, “Where to now?”

  “South. Pretty far south. They’re doing sweeps of neighborhoods, so we can’t be in the city at all.”

  “Great.”

  “And they’re looking for a blond and two brunet men. Mind shaving your head?”

  Absently running his hand over his short, straight hair, he knew he’d miss it. “I’m going to look like a skinhead.”

  “Don’t say that in front of Diego.”

  Tommy smiled and shook his head. “Does everyone have weirdness or just the guys I fall for?”

  “Just the guys you fall for,” he confirmed, laughing. “Get that razor and get busy. I’ll let Diego know.”

  ****

  Diego was staring out the window when Gary entered the room to tell him, “Gotta shave or dye your hair. Sorry.”

  Without turning, Diego confirmed, “Figured we’d have to eventually. You gonna shave?”

  “Face, not hair. I’m more recognizable with it shaved, being that’s how I kept it when I worked with Crowley most of the time.”

  A slow nod was all his response, and Gary could feel the sadness and guilt coming off him in waves. He’d felt those so often in his life, he knew it well. Gary stepped beside him and soothed, “He didn’t stop loving you. That should help.”

  “It doesn’t. He’ll look at me funny from now on.”

  “Maybe, but he’ll respect you for coming clean. He’ll respect you for leaving of your own free will, back when you did. You could have stayed there, become one of those dipshits, but you didn’t. You made something of yourself. More than I did.”

  “You saved the world. Javi and Daniel told me what you and the rest of your men have been doing the last couple of years. Taking out those people who were going to spread a disease that would kill off all but those they chose to keep alive.”

  Gary growled, “It was a job and it made me a ton of money. Don’t try to canonize me.”

  “Why not? You’re look good in papal robes and a halo.”

  Diego turned to face him, and they were close. He could smell the mint scent of his breath coming through his parted lips. It was sexy as hell and reminded him of what Javi had said to him. The three of them…

  It was too insane to think about but at that moment, with Diego’s eyes on his lips, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he stared, it didn’t seem so crazy.

  “I should go shave,” he said in a voice that was hoarse and thick.

  “Yeah, go on,” he agreed, turning away from him. “Don’t be too shocked when you see Tommy. He had to shave his head, too.”

  “He’ll look hot.”

  Breathing out a chuckle, Gary seconded that. “Yeah, he will.”

  When he left the room, Gary could finally catch his breath. The room had been so heavy, so thick, and it was the sexual energy in the room. It made sense. Hatred and anger were forms of passion, after all. It wasn’t something he’d think on long, but for that moment, he let it linger, caressing his imagination.

  Then, he heard something behind him and turned to see Tommy running a hand over his shaved head. “I look ridiculous.”

  No, he didn’t. Diego forgotten, Gary couldn’t resist, couldn’t have stopped if he tried, and he didn’t try. He moved to him and grabbed his face, planting a hot kiss on his lips and sliding his tongue against Tommy’s seductively. “Damn, Diego was right. You look fucking hot.”

  “You’re both crazy.”

  “That’s been established.”

  Tommy was blushing wildly, and his smile told Gary that the kiss wasn’t out of bounds. “Diego will be finished, so lay off the kissing.”

  “Yeah, I know, but I couldn’t help it.”

  Tommy surprised him by reaching down and cupping his quickly rising cock. “Just checking to see if you really think I’m hot.”

  He growled a laugh and pushed him away. “Little fucker.”

  “Yeah.”

  He sent Tommy to pack up the food and medicine they had collected while there and he went to pack the weapons. Walking in on Diego, looking even better shaved than with his luxurious soft hair, Gary swallowed and tried to think of what he’d been trying to do.

  “I look okay, I guess, by the size of the wood in your pants.”

  He was snitched on again by his own dick. “Yeah, I’m gay, you’re hot, it’s such a stretch,” he grumbled, confused as to why he was suddenly defensive around the guy. He rushed away and started loading the guns from the closet into the duffle and realized he’d just run from Diego. Like a fucking coward, afraid of his own attraction, he’d run.

  “Stupid. He’s your competition, not some date. Jesus, Gary, get it together.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Being stuck in a vehicle together after Diego’s confession made for a quiet ride. The radio didn’t work, so all the noise they heard was the tires rolling on the pavement. Tommy kept waiting for a snide comment from Gary, or Diego to ask if he was okay, or any sort of loving gesture he was used to from Diego.

  None came.

  There was something, however, that broke through the silence of the drive. The air was thick with sexual energy. Without provocation, his dick kept getting hard, and at first, he didn’t understand it, but then it became clear.

  More than once, sitting beside Gary in the front seat, he caug
ht Gary glancing in the rearview, and not at the road stretching out behind them. He was stealing looks at Diego.

  As his mind started wrapping around what was going on, he found himself curious as hell. The two of them, some weird attraction that spawned from intense hatred. It made no sense, but then again, it made perfect sense.

  He decided to be the one to finally break the quiet. “Where are we going?”

  Diego answered, “Never talk about it with groups of more than two, Tommy. In case you get separated and one gets caught and tortured for information on the others.”

  Gary’s jaw popped before he gritted out, “Very good. Looks like the white supremacists taught you well.”

  “So, we’re back to this?”

  The tension from before hit new levels and the van swerved as Gary glared over his shoulder. “I was giving you a fucking compliment.”

  “Okay! We don’t talk about it,” Tommy yelled. “Fuck, why don’t the two of you fuck already and get over this snapping at each other.”

  He wanted to take it back as soon as his mouth had closed. They were both staring at him slack-jawed, and he turned his head away from them both.

  Gary growled, “What the fuck are you talking about, Tommy?”

  Gary was demanding, but Tommy didn’t have an answer. If they didn’t know they wanted to fuck each other, he sure as hell wouldn’t be the one to clue them in.

  “Nothing, okay? Nothing, just, Jesus, I thought you two had buried your shit, and if anything, it’s gotten worse.”

  “Shit, babe, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize,” Diego groaned. “I’m sorry, Gary, for my part of it.”

  “I didn’t have a fucking part of it! You didn’t either! So, we’re a little stressed and we snapped at each other! Big fucking deal, Tommy.”

  Tommy started to laugh uncontrollably, feeling it bubbling up from deep inside him, and he knew the other two were staring at him like he’d lost it, but he didn’t care. Not a bit. It felt good, and it took a while, but they joined him, Gary finally pulling the van over, his eyes tearing too hard to see the road.