Starfall

by Melissa Landers

  “Is it just me,” Kane asked, “or is he putting the moves on her?”

  “Sorry, man. I’m not here to discuss your mom’s love life.”

  The abrupt change in Badger’s tone prompted Kane to turn around. The smile had left his friend’s face, and in its place was a sober expression that didn’t fit with the wide ears protruding through his boyish mop of hair. There was a sternness in Badger’s eyes that aged him beyond his years. It seemed he’d grown up, and he hadn’t come over to relive old times.

  “Then why are you here?”

  Badger sank into a chair at the table and indicated the seat beside him. “My squad leader sent me to talk to you. But the original order came from the junior commander.”

  Kane thought back to the high-ranking Booter at the security station. “That twentysomething asshole with the broken nose?”

  Badger shook his head, leaning back and crossing his long legs at the ankles. “No, that’s General Jordan. I meant my other commander.” He lifted one sleeve to reveal the inside of his wrist. He clenched his fist tightly, and a faint tattoo came into view—a red rectangle with an X marked through the center.

  Kane recognized that symbol. He’d seen it all over the city. “You’re part of the rebellion I keep hearing about.” He lifted a brow at his friend. “I’m surprised you told me.”

  “I don’t think you’ll turn me in. You wouldn’t believe how many members we have…some of them right in this backyard.”

  “The farmer?” Kane asked, then sat bolt upright when he realized Badger had said them. “My mom?”

  “Can you blame her? The monarchy blackballed her when you ran off, and then they left the rest of us to fend for ourselves after the war started. Now anyone with a house still standing shares it with five families. Everyone else squats in a tent, if they’re lucky.”

  “But Cassia’s in charge now,” Kane said. He’d heard stories of how she’d dismantled Marius’s missiles and brought in food and supplies from his kingdom. “Look at what she’s already done.”

  “She’s got Marius by the stones. I’ll give her that. But why should I break my back rebuilding this colony for her? I work the land, and she owns it. My great-great-grandfather agreed to serve the Rose dynasty for a new life here, but I shouldn’t be bound by his choice. It wasn’t his to make.”

  “I get it,” Kane said, and he truly did. Two years of space travel had opened his eyes to all sorts of political systems, some of them better than others. “You don’t owe the royals anything, but life’s not perfect on the other settlements, either. I’ve been to places so broke your own neighbors will sell you into slavery.”

  “So I should be grateful to the royals?”

  “I didn’t say that. Give Cassia a chance. She might surprise you.”

  “Let’s assume she does,” Badger said. “Even if she’s the best damn monarch in Eturian history, that doesn’t mean her kids will be, or whatever husband she takes next. But they’ll rule over us for generations to come based on their last name.”

  Kane didn’t want to think about Cassia with children because it forced him to question which blue blood would put them in her. What he wanted to do was to shut down this conversation. “Look, if your commander thinks I can persuade Cassia to walk away from the throne, he’s delusional. She’s wanted this ever since we were kids.”

  “We’re not asking that.”

  “Then what do you want?”

  “No one’s closer to the queen than you are. She even bought out your Daeva contract.”

  “She did?”

  “Yeah, and from what I heard, it wasn’t cheap.”

  “You heard right,” Kane muttered. The price Marius had put on his head was enough to tempt a saint, not that the Daeva had any morals to speak of. By buying out the contract, Cassia had freed him for a whole new kind of life. Now he could show his face in public, anywhere he wanted, without looking over his shoulder.

  “My point is,” Badger continued, “she’ll confide in you. What we need is for you to tell us what she’s planning. That’s how you can help the cause.”

  “You want me to spy on my best friend—the one who bought my contract?”

  “Not spy, really. Just keep your ears open and report…” Badger nodded and threw a hand in the air. “All right, yeah, I want you to spy on her.”

  “Not happening.”

  “Listen, man, we’re taking over this colony, with or without you. Your help might make the difference between a quick transition and a long, bloody battle. The war was bad enough. I don’t want to see anyone else get hurt.” Badger’s gaze shifted toward the barn in the backyard. “Do you?”

  “I liked you better when you were blowing up toilets.”

  “And I liked you better when you weren’t wrapped around Cassia’s pinkie finger.” Badger’s ears lifted as he grinned. “Oh wait. Never mind. That finger’s always had your name on it.”

  Kane chuckled darkly and flashed a hand gesture recognizable to anyone within the Solar Territories. “Here’s a special finger just for you.”

  “Seriously, though. Will you at least think about it?”

  “There’s nothing to think about.” There were some lines Kane wouldn’t cross, and betraying Cassia was one of them. “I’ll keep your secret, but that’s all I can promise.”

  “If you change your mind, you can reach me here most days.”

  “I won’t change my mind,” Kane said.

  The morning dew transformed into a glittering mist beneath the sun’s warmth, clouding the docking field and curling its tendrils around the Banshee where it slumbered. Cassia approached the landing gear and tilted her ear toward the ship’s belly to listen for clunking footsteps or tinny voices. She heard nothing. The crew was probably asleep. She reached for the boarding ramp keypad and then pulled back her hand. She knew the code, but it didn’t seem right boarding the ship without permission.

  She didn’t live there anymore.

  Standing on the outside looking in, she couldn’t deny feeling a little wistful. The ship had been more than a home; it’d been her lens to the galaxy. Within its walls, she’d traveled from bustling tourist planets to systems so remote they didn’t have names. She’d witnessed the birth and collapse of stars—miracles most people would never see.

  “What’s the problem?” Jordan asked. He pounded the side of his fist against the hull and shouted, “Lower your gear for the queen!”

  Cassia cringed. “This is why I wanted to come alone. These people aren’t my subjects. They’re my friends.”

  “Then why didn’t they spend the night in the palace?”

  “Because they didn’t want to impose.”

  The lie slid smoothly off her tongue. Kane had called last night from the ship, claiming that he didn’t want to take a bed away from a refugee when he could sleep in his bunk. But she sensed there was more to it than that.

  Jordan didn’t look convinced. “How considerate of them.”

  The speaker box above their heads crackled to life, and Kane greeted them in a gravelly voice that oozed annoyance. He was always cranky when startled awake. “If the queen wants to use my gear, she’ll have to buy me a drink first. Preferably hellberry wine, but Crystalline will do. I’m not picky.”

  Jordan pinched the bridge of his nose and grimaced as if he’d sucked a lemon. He made an obvious effort to keep his opinion to himself, though it didn’t escape Cassia’s notice that he settled one hand on his pistol.

  She lifted her face toward the speaker. “Kane, let me in. I want to talk to you.”

  “Let yourself in. You know the code.”

  “But I didn’t think…” She trailed off with a groan and punched in the code. “Never mind. I’ll meet you in the galley.”

  The boarding ramp descended with a mechanical whine.

  “Stay here,” she told Jordan. He and Kane were in rare form this morning, and she didn’t have the patience to deal with both of them.

  “Gladly,” he answere
d.

  Once the ramp touched down, she jogged into the cargo hold and then climbed the stairs leading to the galley. Her feet automatically knew to skip the middlemost step, the creaky one, and she caught herself smiling at the mingled scents of engine grease, rust, and day-old chili. She never thought she’d miss that smell. The aroma of ground coffee beans soon followed, and she crossed the threshold into the galley to find Kane standing with his back to her, setting an enormous pot of water on the stove for the morning’s porridge. He must have grabbed yesterday’s clothes off the floor, because he wore a wrinkled pair of canvas pants.

  And nothing else.

  She slowed to a halt and watched the play of his back muscles bunching and flexing beneath his skin as he tended to breakfast. She’d always enjoyed the sight of him shirtless, but until now she hadn’t realized how strong his work as a ship hand had made him. The work had made her strong, too, but his body showed more evidence of it in the form of hard contours that made it difficult not to stare. When he turned around and leaned a hip against the counter, crossing both arms over his bare chest, it took all her strength to level her gaze on his eyes instead of someplace lower.

  “Would the queen like some porridge?” he asked with a grin, but then his expression shifted. He studied her face while inching closer. “Did you sleep at all last night?”

  And that was when she saw it—pity. The same pity that had tainted his gaze yesterday when she’d met him in the security station. She hadn’t appreciated it then, and she sure as hell didn’t like it now. “Stop it. Don’t do that.”

  He stopped in the literal sense, frozen in place.

  “Not that, you idiot,” she said, and pointed at his face. “I mean that thing you’re doing with your eyes. Stop feeling sorry for me.” When he opened his mouth to argue, she cut him off with a threatening glare. “Don’t you dare deny it. I can see it all over your face, and it’s insulting. There’s no reason to pity me. I did more than just survive. I went from the dungeon to the throne, and I did it all by myself.”

  His posture sank. “I know you did.”

  “You should be proud of me.”

  “I am proud of you, Cassy,” he said, splaying both hands. “The happiest moment of my life was when you called me an idiot son of a two-assed mule and I knew you were all right. But you shouldn’t have had to do it alone.”

  “So that’s the problem? You blame yourself?”

  “I wasn’t there for you.”

  “That’s a good thing,” she stressed. “Do you think it was an accident that I bumped into the Daeva? Because it wasn’t. They knew we were coming. It was a trap—half the town was in on it. If you had been there, they would’ve taken us both.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Damn it, Kane, I do know that. And let me tell you what else I know: your safety was the only thing I had to hold on to. If they had tortured you to death while I listened, I wouldn’t have survived it.”

  That seemed to get through to him, because he stood an inch taller.

  “It’s a miracle you weren’t there. It saved us both.” She moved close enough to deliver a light shove to his chest. “So stop acting like I’m broken. I’m not.”

  “Ouch,” he said, teasingly rubbing the spot on his chest. “Don’t I know it.”

  “So you’ll treat me the same as before?”

  Mischief flickered in his gaze. He turned to face the stove and told her, “Quit jabbering and set the table, Your Royal Colonial Highness. Breakfast isn’t going to serve itself.”

  Smiling, she strode to the cabinet and pulled out five bowls. Now that she and Kane had cleared the air, she searched for a safe topic.

  “How’s your mom?”

  “You mean aside from losing her job and everything she owns?”

  “Aside from that,” Cassia said tersely, plunking down a bowl with extra force. “I already promised to reinstate her as soon as I can afford to.”

  “She’s fine.” He stirred the porridge and lowered the heat to let it simmer. “Or that’s what she told me. There was something off about her yesterday. She seemed jumpy.”

  “That’s understandable.” Cassia found her favorite mug and peered around Kane to see if the coffee carafe was full. “It was probably an emotional day for her, seeing you for the first time in so long.”

  “I guess,” he mumbled, taking the mug from her. He filled it with coffee and added three squirts of vanilla syrup and a pinch of cinnamon, just the way she liked it. “Maybe it’s a good thing I didn’t tell her too much.” As he handed back the mug, he peered at her with a cautious expression that tripped her internal alarm. “By the way, I have to talk to you about something.”

  “That doesn’t sound good.”

  “But first you have to promise not to freak out.”

  “Has that ever saved you in the past?”

  “Point taken.” He took a deep breath and blurted, “Gage Spaulding offered me a job.”

  An instant smile sprang to her lips. “That’s great!”

  “Really?” He looked as though he didn’t believe her. “You’re not angry?”

  “Why would I be angry? This is perfect! There’s not a clerk in the kingdom who negotiates like you do. If you’re Gage’s liaison, you can get us a discount on Infinium. We’re going to need a lot of it to power the construction equipment if we want to rebuild.”

  For a moment, he just watched her. “It’s not that kind of job, Cassy.”

  “What kind, then?”

  “He wants me on his sales team. He’s building a barracks near his compound as a sort of home base, but I’d be doing a lot of traveling, mostly in the third sector.”

  “So you wouldn’t live here at all?”

  “I could visit. But, no, I wouldn’t live here.”

  “You turned him down, right?”

  He cocked his head in offense. “Excuse me?”

  “Oh, come on. You can’t possibly take this job.”

  “Actually, I can,” he said, gripping his hips. “And I plan to, as soon as…” He looked down at his bare feet. “As soon as things calm down around here.” Before she could ask what things he was referring to, guilt flitted across his face and he delivered the same pity-filled glance as before. “I want to make sure you’re okay first. You’ve been through a lot. I’ll be here for you for as long as you need me.”

  It was a good thing she felt too stunned for anger, otherwise he would’ve been wearing her coffee. “None of this makes sense. Why would you take an off-world job? We’re home now. It’s what we always wanted.”

  “It’s what you always wanted. Did it ever occur to you that I was happier on this ship? The Banshee’s no palace, but at least here we were equals.”

  “We’re equals now.”

  He barked a laugh. “Sure we are, Your Majesty.”

  “I never treated you like a subject,” she insisted as she set down her mug. “Not one time in all the years we’ve been friends. My title didn’t bother you before we ran away, so it shouldn’t bother you now. Nothing’s changed.”

  Kane seemed somber, almost sad, when he said, “Everything’s changed.”

  Suddenly, she detected movement in her periphery, and she glanced at the top of the doorway to find a ball of auburn fur perched there. It was Acorn. Cassia had forgotten all about her. With a gleeful chirp, the sugar glider launched into the air, spreading her tiny arms wide to sail toward Cassia’s waiting hands.

  “Oh, sweet girl, I went off and left you.” As she nuzzled a patch of soft fur, she imagined how terrified Acorn must’ve felt when her “mother” disappeared. “I’m so sorry, baby.”

  “She was a basket case that first week,” Kane said. “Then Solara started wearing your coat and that helped. Acorn likes having your scent.”

  Cassia dusted kisses on Acorn’s head. “I’m the worst mama ever.”

  “Cut yourself some slack.” Kane turned his gaze to the floor, his voice darkening. “You had to focus on something else
for a while. Doesn’t mean you love her any less.”

  Acorn began rooting around for her favorite pocket above Cassia’s heart, but it didn’t exist on the royal silken tunic.

  “I think she should stay with you when the Banshee leaves,” Kane added. “It makes sense. You’re the one she’s bonded to.”

  Something heavy tugged on Cassia’s stomach. Logically, she knew the crew wouldn’t stay here forever, but at the same time, she couldn’t picture them moving on without her. Especially not Kane. “Whatever Gage promised you, I’ll make sure the clerk’s office matches it.”

  “I don’t care about the money.”

  “Then what?”

  “You know what.”

  She opened her mouth to deny it, but she couldn’t. She did know what he wanted: a commitment, which was the last thing she could give him right now. She thought back to the morning of her wedding, when she’d wished for a second chance with Kane. That chance had come at the worst possible time. The colony was more fragile than spun sugar. Eturia’s needs had to come first. It would take months, maybe years, before she had time to devote to a relationship.

  “Your mother is here,” she reminded him. “All your friends are here.” And me, she added silently. I’m here. “This is the life you wanted before. Why not now?”

  “Because I’m different than I was at sixteen, and so are you.” He spoke his next words carefully, as if afraid they might detonate inside his mouth. “You’re a queen, Cassy—a married queen—and not just of the Rose kingdom. You own the entire planet.” He spread both arms wide, gaping in shock. “I can’t wrap my head around that much power, and to be honest, I can’t believe you’re okay with it.”

  If she hadn’t been so caught up in the conversation, she might’ve heard General Jordan enter from the lower stairs. As it was, he made his presence known by announcing, “The rebels can’t believe it, either. Makes me wonder if the rumors about you are true.”

  It was then that Renny stepped inside the galley from the opposite doorway. He blinked sleepily through his glasses, but there was nothing gentle about his voice. “If you have an issue with one of my crew, take it up with me. Otherwise, get off my ship.”