The soundtrack to our drive became all the random noises that Cecily made. And with each noise she made, I would look in the mirror or try to turn and check on her. No matter how many months she was, this was brand new to me.
There was a calm sense in the SUV though.
Not awkward.
Which I thought was a given.
I finally reached across the seat and gently nudged her arm.
“What?” she asked in an annoyed voice.
“Don’t do that to me, babe,” I said. “What happened?”
“What do you think happened, Elijah?”
“He’s doing it again?”
“He’s starting.”
“Starting?”
“He’s got a process to it. Just… I don’t want to talk about it. We were having a good conversation too. And then…”
“I’m sorry, babe,” I said. “Thank you for calling me.”
“Stop thanking me for calling you,” Nova said. “Makes you sound desperate.”
“Maybe with you I am. I can’t lose you, babe.”
Nova rolled her eyes. “I don’t even know how to take that.”
“As the truth,” I said. “The one thing I’ve always given you. The one thing I always will give you too. Even if it doesn’t seem that way.”
Nova looked at me. I had to keep switching between looking at her and looking at the road. There was a spark there. Fuck, it was an inferno. I wanted to pull over right there and take her into the back of the SUV.
But I couldn’t.
And we both knew it. And we both knew why.
And we both knew it had nothing to do with Nova herself.
My eyes had to stay locked on the road though. For everyone’s safety. And heart.
Cecily let out a few more baby noises. A part of me wanted to talk about Cecily. Brag about all I knew about her. But I feared with anything said about Cecily, it would hurt Nova.
Once again, there was my heart ripped into pieces.
I stopped smiling. I stopped feeling anything.
I just gripped the steering wheel and drove.
As long as both Nova and Cecily were safe near me that was all I could do for them.
“They all just act so fake,” Nova said from nowhere.
“What’s that, babe?”
“Fake,” she said. “I’m tired of fake, Elijah. They didn’t talk about what I did to my mother’s new vehicle. It just drives me crazy. And then she tells me how she knows that cop. I guess rich people are allowed to drink and drive. And get caught. And get a ride home without worry. I can’t be mad at the cop because even if he did arrest her, there are always lawyers…” Nova shook her head. “Why does this matter?”
“It’s on your mind,” I said. “So it matters. Can I say something?”
“Yeah,” she said.
I slowed the SUV and pulled to the side of the road.
I reached for Nova’s face.
“I hate your parents, babe,” I said. “I mean, they almost make mine look good. Which is a lot to say. At the very least here, don’t ever go back there. Ever again. If you’re going to bust up car windows, let me help. In case things go south I can take the fall.”
Nova touched my wrist and pushed my hand away from her face. “That’s the thing, Elijah… you think that sounds sweet and romantic. And maybe it is. But there’s no take the fall anymore.”
I opened my mouth to fight back at Nova, but Cecily made her presence known again by letting out a long cry.
She didn’t like when we weren’t driving.
And she also proved Nova’s statement and point.
I wasn’t in a position to get arrested for breaking car windows, was I?
Nova pulled my hand toward her mouth and kissed my middle knuckle.
She smiled but it wasn’t a big smile. Or even a happy smile.
It was the kind of smile you gave someone when they realized things were different and were going to stay that way.
I nodded and started to drive again.
“Babe, I can drive around all night with you two with me,” I said. “Cecily likes being driven around. She’ll probably fall asleep soon. But if there’s anywhere you want me to take you, speak up now.”
Nova didn’t respond.
She looked out the window instead.
She slowly put her feet to the seat and hugged her legs.
That was the way I would forever remember her.
That was if I had to honestly leave her as a memory.
* * *
I parked outside Cherry’s house, figuring it was really the only place to take Nova.
Nova turned her head and looked at me.
We just stared at each other.
Now what? was the logical question but neither of us wanted to ask it or answer it.
Instead, I put my hand palm up at the middle console.
Nova’s eyes moved to my hand, then back to my eyes.
She slowly nodded and even slower, she put her hand on top of mine.
Our fingertips interlocked tight.
There was a sense of peace between us right then. There was a way to make it all work. Now that I had enough of the truth staring at me, I could make it all work.
“Nova,” I whispered. “There’s so much…”
“I know, Elijah,” she whispered back. “Just not right now. Okay?”
“Yeah. Okay.”
“You should come inside,” she said.
“What?”
“If you have… your daughter…” Nova swallowed hard. “If you have her with you and you don’t bring her in to see Cherry…”
“That’s a good point,” I said. “I was going to make plans for a different time.”
“Don’t bother,” Nova said.
Nova took her hand away from mine and got out of the SUV.
She started to walk away, leaving me to myself.
Cecily let out another whine so all my focus went to her.
As I unbuckled her from her car seat, she stared at me.
“You’re going to love Cherry,” I said. “I hope she’s an important part of your life, little girl.”
I held Cecily tight against me as I walked toward the house.
Nova was already inside.
She wanted nothing to do with walking near me.
Which hurt, but I couldn’t blame her.
Cherry tore open the front door to the house and when she saw me, she covered her mouth.
She started to do some kind of tap dance on her toes, proving once again she had moves that did not fit her look. She put her hands out and her fingers wiggled as she let out a bunch of noises of excitement.
“I promise you, little girl, she means well,” I whispered to Cecily.
“You brought her,” Cherry called out. “You finally brought her here.”
I walked up the steps and Cherry wasn’t going to let me inside the house without handing over the baby.
“Can I?” Cherry asked.
“Of course,” I said. “It’s been a day…”
“So I’ve heard,” Cherry said.
“Oh?”
“Noelle filled me in on a lot of things,” she said. “Nova had an exciting day.”
“Not good,” I said. “She… I don’t know, Cherry. Where did she go?”
“She came inside to tell me you and the baby were here,” Cherry said. “Then she went to her room.”
I frowned. “This is…”
Cherry hugged Cecily. “This is a miracle. This is life. Everything else will fall into place, Elijah.” Cherry then looked at Cecily. “And now, my sweet Cecily, you get to meet your dear old Cherry. We have a lot to talk about. Hope you’re hungry.”
“Cherry…”
Cherry looked at me with a scowl. “I’m joking, Elijah. Don’t turn into that on me. I know how to take care of a baby.”
“I’ll put her bag on the table,” I said.
“Can’t believe you’re carrying a diaper bag,” Cherry said.
“I don’t like calling it that,” I said. “Makes me sound…”
“Grown up? Fatherly? Not so tough anymore?”
I walked past Cherry shaking my head.
The second the smell of her house hit my nose, it was relief. My mind raced to paint a picture of Cherry helping me with Cecily. Not raising her but being the family Cecily needed. And then me and Nova…
I had to chase the thoughts away.
I put the diaper bag on the table and watched as Cherry walked Cecily through the house, giving her a very detailed tour of each room, each item on each shelf, and each picture and the story behind each one.
I laughed as I walked the opposite way, giving Cherry time alone with Cecily.
One thing in the back of my mind was that I hadn’t heard from Rory at all. Not a call or text. Nothing to even check up on the baby. Which pissed me off. But at the same time… if Rory was gone… for good…
I went to Nova’s room and grabbed the doorknob.
I paused.
I released my hold and gently knocked.
It pained me to knock on the door. As though I were a stranger. Unwelcome. Unneeded. Unwanted.
Nova opened the door with a confused look on her face.
“Hey, babe,” I said.
“Hey.”
I swallowed hard. “What’s going on?”
“Seriously?”
“How’s your day? Your night? I don’t even know what time it is right now.”
“Time for you to get a watch,” Nova said.
“Funny,” I said. “Are you going to invite me in?”
“A boy? In my room? Not a chance.”
I looked around. “I don’t see a boy anywhere.”
Nova laughed. “Oh, that’s right. You think you’re a man, huh?”
I grinned. “I’m good with this. Just so you know.”
“With what?”
“Standing here like this,” I said. “Flirting with you. Finding ways to make you smile. Or blush.”
Nova started to shut the door.
I put my hand out. “That’s it?”
“That’s it,” she said. “I’m bored with you already.”
“Then maybe I should change up my routine,” I said.
“How are you going to do that?”
I slid my hand down to the doorknob and pulled the door shut.
I waited a couple seconds.
“What is this?” Nova yelled from behind the closed door.
I opened the door on my own.
I stepped into the bedroom and slipped my hands to Nova’s face again.
“My change in routine,” I said.
I brought my lips down to Nova’s.
Her lips quivered against mine.
“This isn’t a change,” she whispered. “You fucking liar.”
“Oh?”
“This is what you always do.”
“Oh. That’s right. Oh well.”
I kissed her again. I reached back and shut the door.
We stood there, making out.
Her body gently pressing against mine. Pulling away. Pressing closer. Pulling away again.
She couldn’t make up her mind.
So I made it for her.
I spun us around and moved my hands to the curve of her lower back and pulled her close and held her there. I put her against the bedroom door and put my forehead to hers.
Our eyes met, flirted, hated each other, loved each other, and flirted some more.
We were both breathing heavily as though we had just gotten done fooling around in bed.
I felt her heart racing and pounding.
Mine was doing the same damn thing.
Yet the real story was downstairs.
Cecily.
Nova put her hands to my stomach and nudged.
I eased back and gave her space, nodding as I did so.
“I…”
“I know,” I whispered. I backed away and sat on the edge of the bed. “Fuck, I know. Nova. Look at me.”
“I already am.”
“I mean really look at me, babe.”
Nova leaned her head forward a little and opened her eyes wide.
I smiled.
Fuck, she always made me smile.
My hands touched the bed and I gripped the sheets tight.
“I love you,” I said. “I’ve said it before. So many times, I know. But I mean it when I say it. And I know by saying those words it hurts you. It hurts you because you don’t know what the hell is going on or what to do with it all. And I can’t blame you for that, Nova. But no matter what, I just want you to know I love you.”
I stood from the bed and walked to the door.
Nova moved out of the way so I could leave the bedroom.
I tore open the door and Nova made a fast move, grabbing my hand.
She tugged at me.
I looked at her.
She interlocked her fingers into mine again.
She nodded and exited the room with me.
“Nova…”
“It’s okay,” she whispered.
We walked together in silence.
Hand in hand.
Down to the kitchen where Cherry had Cecily attached to her hip like she had been holding the baby since birth. And Cecily was happy. Her face bright, little hands holding Cherry’s shirt.
Cherry danced a little, plastic jar in front of Cecily’s face.
“Oh, hello there,” Cherry said in a silly voice as though the jar were actually able to talk.
“What is that?” I asked her.
Cherry turned. “Cinnamon. I don’t have any baby toys here. I’m going to have to change that.”
She then moved her eyes between Nova and me.
We were still holding hands.
“You’re letting my daughter play with cinnamon?” I asked.
“Lid’s on tight,” Cherry said. “And I’m calling her that now. She’s my little jar of cinnamon.”
Nova laughed. “Always with the nicknames.”
“Wait,” I said. “What was Nova’s nickname?”
“Doesn’t matter,” Nova said.
“She was my little knotty Nova,” Cherry said. “Because of that hair.”
I laughed.
“Shut up,” Nova said. “What was yours?”
“I never had one,” I said.
“Yes you did,” Cherry said. “You were ugh.”
“What?” I asked.
“That’s what you were,” Cherry said. “Ugh. That was my reaction each time you came around.”
“Ouch,” I said.
“Still fitting for him,” Nova said.
“You’re one to talk,” I said, playfully messing with Nova’s messy yet beautiful hair.
She pulled away from me and swatted my hand.
Then she let out a gasp. “The baby…”
I hurried to look and Nova was on the move.
Cecily had spit up a little and Nova already had a paper towel. She ran it under the sink water for a second and then carefully wiped the baby’s chin.
I gritted my teeth.
It filled me up and tore me down all in the same breath.
Cherry smiling at Nova as Nova helped my daughter.
Those images returned again.
Rory gone. Nova here. Figuring out this family thing…
I felt my phone buzz in my pocket.
It was a text message that kept those images as a fantasy.
Rory.
Sry. B back tmr morning. Hugs n kisses to you both! <3
Chapter 10
Nova
What the hell am I doing right now?
That question went through my head over and over and over again.
Right behind my seat was the car seat with Elijah’s baby in it.
And Elijah next to me, driving us back to his father’s house. Or whatever he wanted to call that house. I knew he hated it being called his home. It was just the place where he slept. And had been for a while
now. His plan to come to Hidden and stir shit up had worked better than he thought. Except it was for misguided reasons.
Something came over me at Cherry’s. As we all hung out, talked, laughed, and gave all of our attention to Cecily. She was a beautiful baby. This perfect, little ball of life. With an attitude that was going to drive Elijah crazy for the rest of his life. Which in a way made me smile. He deserved every ounce of sass that Cecily could muster up and give him.
I had no idea what that meant for me or for me and Elijah, but there was only one way to find out.
He had been there for me when I needed him.
My instinct every time something went wrong was to call him. Was to need him. Was to want him. And he had been there each and every time. Without hesitation either.
And when he said he loved me, I believed him.
I loved him too.
Nobody did anything wrong… maybe not even Rory.
Even still, the anger that was in both Elijah and I was real. And raw.
But together, it subsided.
It stayed quiet enough that a sense of normal went through me.
“Are you sure about this?” Elijah asked as he pulled into the driveway of his father’s house.
“Yeah,” I said. “I mean, even if Rory is here, so what, right? I promise I won’t beat her up. And I won’t take rocks or baseball bats or golf clubs to anyone’s car.”
“Swear on your life?” Elijah asked.
“Pinky swear,” I said, sticking out my left pinky.
Elijah hooked his pinky to mine and pulled at me.
We met in the middle of the front seat and kissed.
He then looked at the massive house and sighed. “The only good thing about this place is that I can go unseen. They hate me so much they’ll do anything to avoid me.”
“Don’t say that.”
Elijah looked at me. “Really?”
“I know,” I said. “Sorry. I just can’t stand the idea that your father acts the way he does. Rosemary too. You did nothing wrong. He did the wrong thing. He’s the one who cheated…” I let my voice trail off and Elijah started to grin. “What?”
“You really do love me, babe.”
“Ohgod,” I said.
I opened the door and climbed out.
I went to the backseat and opened the door.
Cecily was sound asleep.
Elijah shut his door hard, Cecily jumped but stayed asleep.
When he came around the back of the SUV, I put my finger to my lips.
HIDDEN CREEK CRY: a hidden creek high noval Page 11