Jack and Jill: Army

by Ansley Gilmore

  Chapter 13

  Johnny’s Pizza

  Jack parked the Hummer in the crowded parking lot of Johnny’s Pizza shop. I don’t like socializing, and I don’t like crowds. I should just turn around and go back to my barracks.

  Walking slowly into the noisy pizza shop, he heard laughter in the far corner. As his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting he could make out the face of Jill, an older couple, and three guys with short military-style haircuts that were a bit older than him. They were sitting around a large circular table. A single empty chair was next to Jill. So, I guess that is where I am supposed to sit and make small talk. Walking even more slowly, Jack again considered leaving before they spotted him. I could say that I was sick, or maybe I had a flat tire, or maybe—

  “Savage, over here.” Jill raised her voice and motioned with her hand.

  There is no getting out of this now . . .

  Jill stood and held out her hand, and Jack reciprocated with a handshake. He noticed that Jill was taller than usual. In fact, she was as tall as Jack. He glanced down and saw a pair of black and white stilettos with two-inch heels on Jill’s feet. Then he looked at her black slacks, slender legs, and broad hips. He noticed her short-sleeved white blouse. She has the thinnest arms I have ever seen on a soldier.

  “It’s good to see you, Jack. I am glad you could make it.” Jill sounded unusually cheerful. “This is my family: Mom, Dad, Boomer, Boxer, and Bird, which is short for Bird Man.”

  Jack nodded at each person as they were introduced. Boomer, Boxer, and Bird, were on his side of the table next to him, and each reached out to shake his hand. Jack felt thick calluses on the hands of each of her brothers when they shook hands. Hmmm, I wonder what these guys do for a living. Then he noticed their thick arms, and broad necks that were flanked by broad shoulders. Maybe they get those calluses from weight lifting. Their father looks like he lifts, too.

  “I know that you want to learn all about my family, but we need to order first,” Jill said. “We are all meat eaters. Would the Meat Lovers Pizza be okay with you, Jack?”

  Jack nodded.

  “Now, we’re are all going to have sodas to drink, but I will be glad to order a beer for you if you like,” Jill said.

  “Diet cola is fine.”

  Jill motioned to a waitress and placed the ordered.

  “Now that is out of the way, I want to fill you in on the nicknames. First, Bird Man got his nickname from flying Hueys in Vietnam. He flew over fifteen hundred missions and saved the lives of countless soldiers through medical evacuations. Most pilots never saw that much action, but he decided that he liked it so much that he re-enlisted for a second tour. It worked out well, and he only got a couple of minor gunshot wounds during his two tours.”

  Bird was sitting next to Jack. Jack looked at him and thought about the gunfire that Bird would have flown through when landing and taking off from a hot landing zone. He would have been a sitting duck, yet he re-enlisted. What kind of crazy person would re-enlist under those conditions?

  “Boomer started in the Army in demolition,” Jill said. “That just wasn’t exciting enough for him, so he decided that when his tour in Vietnam was finished, he would re-enlist in the bomb squad. He was disabling IEDs in the underground tunnels that the VCs were digging. It was dark, cold, and he never knew if a VC was just around the next turn in the tunnels. He had to keep looking over his shoulder in the tunnels while he disarmed the bombs.”

  Jack didn’t mind dark spaces, but he thought that small and dark sounded creepy.

  “Finally, there’s Boxer. He was in the Army’s 82nd Airborne and was also the winner of the ‘Best Warrior’ competition at Fort Bragg three years in a row. The third year they added a boxing competition for fun and he won it by beating a six foot five inch goliath that weighed two hundred and seventy pounds. It took him fourteen rounds, but in the end he knocked out goliath. They still talk about it at Fort Bragg.”

  Jack didn’t know what to say. I had no idea that her brothers were that tough and rugged.

  “So I guess that is why you joined the Army?” Jack asked Jill.

  “That is part of the reason.”

  “It is a little unusual for four siblings to all be in the military. It is even more unusual for them all to be in the same branch. What was the reason you all joined the Army?” Jack asked.

  Silence.

  The eyes of all four siblings drifted to the father.

  Jack looked at the father and realized he was somehow responsible for the sibling’s interest in the Army. “So what is your nickname?”

  Jill laughed. “Dad’s nickname is Shooter. But I am going to let him tell you about his military background.”

  Jack’s eyes shifted to the right slightly. “What about your mom, does she have a nickname?”

  Everyone at the table burst out in laughter.

  “Jack, you are so funny,” Jill responded. “No, of course not. She had to be at home and keep things normal while the rest of us were serving our country.”

  Jack felt a little embarrassed that he asked a ridiculous question like that, but he did see the humor from their perspective.

  “Sorry, ma’am,” Jack said to Jill’s mom.

  “Jack, if that is the worst thing you ever say about me, we are going to get along just fine,” Jill’s mom replied. “By the way, my given name is Hope, and I would like it if you called me by that name.”

  “Yes, ma’am . . . I mean, Hope.”

  The waitress came and set down three pitchers of diet cola and glasses. She said, “The pizza will be out in just a minute.”

  As the waitress walked to the kitchen to get the pizzas, Hope looked at Jack and asked, “Jack, you haven’t asked about Jill’s nickname.”

  “Ma’am—I mean Hope, I didn’t know that she had a nickname. Now that you mention it, I am curious.”

  “Her nickname is Dude,” Hope said.

  Glancing around the table, Jack saw each person had a grin on their face. “Okay, I think this must be the part where I ask, ‘Where did she get the nickname Dude?’”

  Hope spoke up. “A dude is a guy that pays a lot of attention to his clothes. In Jill’s case, she has always been a good dresser. Of course you wouldn’t notice it since you’ve always seen her in her military uniform. It’s true that she is not a guy, but she has proven her ability to keep up with her brothers over the years. So, we like to call her Dude.”

  “I have seen he pull her weight with the guys before, so I think the name is appropriate. It’s sort of . . . cute,” Jack said.

  Everyone laughed.

  “What’s so funny?” asked Jack.

  “It’s just that a tough guy like you doesn’t normally use the word ‘cute,’” Hope said.

  Jack recognized the humor, and chuckled at his comment. This family is fun to be around. Tough people, but they are friendly, and have a good sense of humor.

  The waitress brought three large pizzas and set them in the middle of the table. “Enjoy. If you need anything else, just let me know.”

  “I am so hungry,” Jill said. “Dad, would you like to ask the blessing?”

  “Certainly, Dude.”

  Jack wondered what ‘ask the blessing’ meant. Before he realized what was happening each person around the table grabbed the hand of the person next to them. Jill grabbed his right hand with her left hand, and Bird grabbed Jack’s left hand. Jack saw everyone bow their heads like they were going to pray, so he also bowed his head. Jack didn’t normally like being around people that were religious, but Jill’s family was religious in a different kind of way. They prayed before meals like religious people, but they were tough and fun loving like the other Army buddies that he was used to being around.

  “Let’s pray,” said Shooter. “Lord, thank you for this food and our time in fellowship around it. I also want to thank you for bringing Jack to this table tonight. Thank you for watching over Jill and Jack during their training, and thank you for the way Jack was able to
help Jill when she needed it. Most of all, I thank you for your presence in our midst this evening. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”

  Jack thought how Shooter’s prayer seemed un-religious. Shooter talked to God like God was his friend. His prayer wasn’t a memorized speech.

  “Jack, you get the first slice,” Jill said as she scooped up the biggest slice and put it on Jack’s plate.

  The taste of Meat Lover’s Pizza on Jack’s palate relaxed him. He was enjoying the evening. While they ate, the brothers shared war stories. Hope, Shooter, Jill, and Jack quietly listened to the stories, but often laughed during the humorous parts. After the pizza and cola was consumed, Boxer asked, “Is it time?” Each person looked at the others, and everyone except Jack nodded.

  “There is a table for two in the far corner,” Boxer said. Everyone stood and began migrating to the smaller table. Jack looked at Jill as he stood.

  “Trust me. This will be fun,” Jill said.

  “Who is going to be first?” asked Boxer.

  “I think it is Jill and Bird’s turn,” Boomer said.

  “Oh no. Not tonight . . . please,” Jill responded.

  “Come on, be a good sport and show Jack what you got,” Boxer said.

  With hesitation, Jill sat on one of the two seats and Bird sat on the other. Their faces sobered as each placed their right elbow near the center of the table. Then they each stretched and clenched their fingers on their right hand several times. Finally they opened their hands and grabbed each other’s hand in an arm wrestling grip. This scene amused Jack. A skinny little female lieutenant, fresh out of the academy, is going to arm-wrestle her older brother who is twice her size. This should be fun.

  Jack noticed that Jill didn’t seem intimidated by the situation. She must have done this many times before.

  “Are you ready?” said Boxer.

  Jill and Bird stared each other in the eyes and nodded.

  “Get ready . . .”

  Jill and Bird each wiggled their elbows as they tried to find a position that would give each of them the most power.

  “Get set . . .”

  Jill and Bird wiggled their hands and fingers as they each searched for the best grip.

  “GO!”

  The muscles stiffened in Jill’s and Bird’s hands, arms and shoulders. Their faces tensed and eyes squinted as each stared into the eyes of their opponent. Grunts could be heard over the restaurant’s background noise. Their arms began to quiver as they tried to force their opponents arm to the table. Jack was amused by Jill’s determination. There is no way she can beat her brother.

  Jill was the first to gain ground as her arm moved slightly in the direction of the table. Jack realized that Bird was holding back so his “little sister” would feel like she was tougher than she really was. Then Bird began to take advantage and his arm moved closer to the table. The two arms inched back and forth in a slow quivering dance. Jack was amused at the show that Jill and Bird were putting on. Customers at neighboring tables were beginning to stare at the spectacle. The quivering in the locked hands increased. Then the slow back and forth struggle began to dissipate as Jill’s arm began a slow descent that marked her winning move. Her arm slowly descended. Bird did his best to grimace in a realistic fashion. Finally with only an inch left to her victory, Bird relaxed his arm and let Jill slam his knuckles into the table.

  “Ouch! Go easy on me, Dude. You shouldn’t take advantage of an old man like me,” Bird said.

  Jack looked around and saw that all of the people at the neighboring tables were applauding at the show that Jill and Bird had put on.

  “Well, that will teach you not to pick on a woman!” Jill said. “Okay Jack, now it’s your turn. You can have my seat, and Boxer can sit there.” Jill pointed to each seat as she spoke.

  Jack looked at Jill, and then he looked at Boxer. Boxer’s muscular arms, shoulders, and neck suddenly seemed much larger than before. Jack didn’t want to be beaten in any situation, and certainly not by his commander’s brother. “Maybe this isn’t such a good idea,” Jack said.

  Boxer looked at Jack and said, “What is your nickname, Jack?”

  “I don’t have one,” Jack replied.

  “Here’s the deal. Either you arm wrestle, or we will give you a nickname, and trust me, we’ll think up a nickname that you don’t like.”

  Jack wasn’t sure if Boxer was kidding, serious, or just egging him on. At any rate he felt cornered, so he was going to have to arm wrestle. Why did I come tonight? Maybe I should have just stayed in the barracks.

  Jack and Boxer took their positions on opposite sides of the table. Jack looked at his opponent and wished he were anywhere but here. Jack and Boxer placed their elbows on the table, locked hands, tightened their grip on each other, and waited.

  Jill began the count. “Get ready, get set, GO!”

  Jack tensed his muscles and applied all the force he could muster. Boxer did the same. Nothing happened. Their arms didn’t budge, just quivered.

  “Go, Boxer,” Jill yelled.

  “Come on, Jack,” Hope yelled.

  “Let him have it, Boxer,” Bird yelled.

  “Sock it to him, Boxer,” Boomer yelled.

  Jack didn’t hear any cheering from Shooter. He glanced at Shooter and noticed that he was just standing there with a smile on his face. He looks like he is enjoying this. Why isn’t he cheering for one of us?

  Boxer’s muscles were tensing more, and his arm began to take advantage as it slowly moved toward the table. Jack felt pangs of humiliation and desperately wanted to avoid loosing. He spread his feet a little and leaned into the death grip they had on each other. He began to gain ground that he had initially lost. Slowly, the two hands began to move closer to a victory for Jack. Soon, Jack’s hand was only two inches from the table and his victory was in sight.

  “Come on, Boxer. You can’t let me down. Sock it to him,” Jill yelled at the top of her voice.

  Jack didn’t like to hear his boss rooting for his opponent, even if it was her brother.

  Jill leaned in close to the quivering fists and yelled, “Go, Boxer!”

  As Jill shouted this last encouragement to her brother, Jack felt a stabbing sensation in his right foot. The pain shot from up from his foot, through his knee, and into his thigh. Glancing down he saw that Jill, when leaning toward the clenched fists, had jammed one of her stiletto heels into the top of Jack’s foot. The pain was sharp, painful, and distracting. With his attention diverted from the arm wrestling, his arm relaxed involuntarily and was slammed into the table by Boxer.

  “Yes! I knew you could do it, Boxer!” Jill yelled.

  “What the . . .” Jack mumbled.

  Jack leaned back in his chair. He looked around the room at all the people that stopped eating to watch him and Boxer. Then he looked at Jill’s parents. Shooter and Hope were both laughing. Jack looked at Jill and her brothers. All four siblings were jumping up and down and dancing a victory dance. Normally, in this type of situation, Jack would feel humiliated and dejected. But for some strange reason, Jack felt like this made him a part of Jill’s family.

  Jill slapped him on the back so hard it knocked the air out of his lungs. “You are a lot of fun, Jack.”

  Jack was having fun. He couldn’t remember having this kind of fun before. Growing up in orphanages, he never relaxed with people like this. He never experienced “fun competition,” and certainly never enjoyed loosing before. This was a new experience for Jack and he was having a hard time understanding why he liked Jill’s family so much.

  He smiled at the four siblings, and when they calmed down he said, “All right, you got me good this time, but next time . . .”

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah . . . there you go, talking tough again,” Jill said. The four siblings started laughing again. This time Jack joined them.

  Boxer, Bird, and Boomer took a break to go to the restroom. Hope walked over to Jill and began talking to her. Shooter walked over to Jack. “You have a good sense
of humor, Jack. That goes a long way, especially around this family.”

  Jack smiled politely.

  “Jack, I heard about your four bull’s-eyes in the sniper competition. I know that that is unheard of in the sniper world. I am proud to have my daughter working with you. Jill doesn’t talk much to me about the people she works with, but the little that she said about you is rather impressive. I can see why the Army has matched you two together. Jill is very strategic minded, but sometimes needs help with the tactical decisions. But, I am guessing that you have already figured that out.”

  Jack thought about what Shooter just said. “I know Jill is very talented, and was the best of her class, but no one is perfect. That is part of the reason for a sniper team.”

  “You have good insight, Jack. I want you know that if you ever get in a bind and need anything, just give me a call,” Shooter said.

  Jack was puzzled by Shooter’s statement. What could he do for Jack? Jack was a self-sufficient person and rarely asked anyone for help. “I’m not sure what you are saying.”

  “Let’s just say that I still have connections in the Army, and if you need any favors, I may be able to help.”

  “So, exactly how did you get your nickname Shooter?”

  “I started out as a sniper just like you did. Eventually I ended up running the sniper school at Fort Benning. I was stationed there when I retired.”

  “Hmmm . . . and I suppose that you are the person that taught Jill to hunt elk?”

  “That was actually a joint effort between her three brothers and me.”

  “Well, she has proven herself on the range during the sniper competition. I’m glad you taught her so well.”

  Hope finished talking to Jill. She walked toward Jack and said, “Jack, could I talk to you for a minute?”

  Jack walked over to her, and Shooter walked over to talk to Jill. Jack noticed that Hope was about sixty tall and slender like Jill. She also had long dark air and blue eyes like Jill. Unlike Jill, her hair was not in a ponytail; it gently flowed around her neck and shoulders. As Jack looked at her he imagined what Jill would look like when she was her mother’s age.

  “Jack, I want to thank you for watching out for Jill. She is a wonderful daughter, but she sometimes gets herself into situations that overwhelm her. She needs someone like you to keep her in line and make sure that her good intentions don’t come back to haunt her.”

  Jack thought about this and realized that Jill’s mom truly understood Jill’s plight in life.

  “Ma’am . . . er, Hope, I have seen Jill in action, and I must say that she is one amazing woman.” Jack surprised himself. He not only referred to her as amazing, but he also referred to her as a woman. Somehow he had gotten used to the idea of thinking of Jill as a soldier. Jack glanced over to Jill as she was talking to her father. He looked at her long slender legs and stiletto heels. She is the prettiest soldier I’ve ever seen.

  “Jill and I talk a lot, and I feel like I already know you very well. I think you have a protective spirit about you, Jack, and that is just what Jill needs. But you should also know that deep down inside she has other needs. She needs compatibility and friendship. She does get some compatibility from just being in the Army, but not on a personal level. She also doesn’t get any friendship either, at least not on an intimate level. She has always had a close relationship to her family, but it stops there. I think she needs to grow past that and find true friendship with other people as well.”

  Jack looked at Hope, and wondered what she was trying to say.

  “I realize that she is your commander, and that is not going to change in the near future. But, you should know that she has great respect for you, much more than you realize.”

  This caught Jack by surprise. Since when has that skinny little soldier ever shown respect for me?

  “Jack, keep in mind that as your leader she doesn’t want to let you see any of her faults. That is natural for anyone, but especially for a leader, and even more so for a woman. What I am trying to say is that on a rare occasion Jill may want to open up a little and seek a friendly relationship with people that she respects. Don’t be surprised if she does that to you when you least expect it.”

  Jack pondered this and realized that Hope had some good observations concerning his relationship with Jill. “Thank you for these insights. I never thought about Jill in those terms.”

  “I know, Jack. Sometimes in the middle of war games, or combat, it is hard to think about personal relationships at these levels.” Hope smiled at Jack. “Anyhow, I am so glad that the Army has found such a nice person to team up with my daughter.”

  This statement caught Jack by surprise. ‘Nice person?’ I have been called a lot of things in my life, but never that.

  “Jack, I will be thinking about you, and praying for you as you two go out on your upcoming mission.”

  “Ma’am, it’s a training mission.”

  “Oh yes. Training mission. I have heard that many times before. I have seen Shooter, Boxer, Boomer, and Bird all go out on training missions before. By now I have learned how to tell when it is a training mission and when it is a real mission. Each time it is a real mission, they get real quiet and start to withdraw just before shipping out. Jill is going through that stage now, although tonight she is doing her best to act her normal self. I know you can’t talk about it, but from past experience, I have learned to watch the news channel all my waking hours during these so-called ‘training missions.’ I always have trouble sleeping until everyone gets back safely.”

  “You are very discerning.”

  “Jack, there are two favors that I want to ask you before you go.”

  “What’s that?”

  “First, take good care of Jill, she is my only daughter. I made it through my husband and three boys going off to war, but I never expected that my only daughter would follow in their footsteps. She is the last to leave the nest, and I can’t bear the thought of anything happening to her.”

  Jack noticed Hope’s eyes beginning to fill up. “I will do everything I possibly can to bring her back alive and well.”

  “You are such a sincere person. I am so glad you’re Jill’s partner.”

  “You said there was a second favor.”

  “Please take good care of yourself, too. In order to take care of Jill, you need to take care of yourself, so don’t lose sight of those priorities. And—well—just between you and me, I like you a lot, and I think that Jill likes you a lot, too. Her other boyfriends have been nice guys, but they just were not the perfect match that she needs. I don’t want to put the cart before the horse. I just think that there may be more to your relationship than you or Jill realize. You could call it a mother’s intuition. At any rate, I think you are special, and it would be hard for me to think about anything bad happening to you.”

  Jack looked into Hope’s full eyes and saw a tear run down her cheek. Hope seems like a kind person, and she has a sincere interest in my safety.

  “Jack, I also want you to know that after talking to you I feel like I now have a fourth son,” Hope said.

  A tear ran down her other cheek. Jack’s own eyes began to fill up, and he tried to hold back his own emotions. It had been a long time since he experienced the concern of a loving mother.

  Hope reached out with both arms and gave Jack a long and tight hug.

  Jack thought he had grown very close to Hope, Shooter, Boomer, Boxer, and Bird in a short time. This family is very special . . .