Abby in Wonderland

by Ann M. Martin

  Which isn’t to say she doesn’t have her fun side. She definitely does. On the ride back to the Hamptons she entertained us with more funny stories about the Pike at-home vacation. Apparently, the Pike kids had discovered some new neon-colored sunblock and were practically living in it. “It’s as if they’ve turned into some weird tribe of purple people,” she told us. Her lively talk was a welcome relief from the odd silence between Mom and me.

  As we drove into town, Mom suggested Kristy might like to look in some of the shops. I didn’t think she would. Kristy isn’t much of a shopper. But, while we were stopped at a light, Kristy suddenly cried out, “Look!”

  Ace Evans, the sportscaster, was strolling down the street with his wife, the actress Marie Evans. From time to time you can spot various celebrities in the Hamptons. It’s a popular vacation spot for actors, writers, models, and so on. Kristy wouldn’t have cared if we’d spotted one of them. But a sports figure — that caught Kristy’s eye.

  Even Mom seemed impressed. “He is a handsome man,” she commented, which surprised me. Mom doesn’t usually say things like that. “And look at her sundress! Gorgeous.” Eagle-eyed Mom craned her neck slightly to check out the name of the shop on the bags the actress held. “I wonder if they sell that dress there,” she said as she pulled into a space at the curb. “I want to see.”

  So it was settled. Kristy and I would browse around downtown while Mom made a beeline for the shop named on the bags.

  The moment we were alone, I wanted to spill my guts to Kristy and tell her everything. But before I could say anything, she said, “I have to have his autograph. Come on.”

  She bolted down the street and I had no choice but to hurry after her.

  I was glad she’d cut me off. What sense was there in bumming out Kristy for the short time she would be here? Besides, knowing her, if she was made aware of a problem, she’d knock herself out trying to fix it. She was an uncontrollable problem solver. But she’d be wasting her energy.

  Not even Kristy could fix this problem.

  Stacey had remembered how much the Pikes enjoyed trips to downtown Sea City during their annual vacations. She decided the Pikes should take a trip into town. Then, after that, they planned to return home for a night under the stars. Each Pike kid was allowed to invite a guest, so Mallory and Jessi came along as additional baby-sitters.

  Mr. Pike and Mrs. McGill drove the Pike kids, Stacey, and Claudia into town. The guests (driven by Jessi’s aunt Cecelia and by Mrs. Kishi) met them at Pizza Express. The guest list was almost the same as it had been for the beach party barbecue, except that since Kristy wasn’t around to bring David Michael, Nicky invited eight-year-old James Hobart, who came with his older brother, Ben. (This made Mallory very happy, because she likes Ben Hobart a lot — if you know what I mean.)

  Mr. Pike had given Stacey and Claudia money to buy pizza for all the kids. There were so many of them that they had to sit at two big tables.

  After they had eaten, they set out for their tour of town. To be honest, there’s not a whole lot for a bunch of kids to do in downtown Stoneybrook, for free, anyway. But Stacey had called ahead the night before and arranged for them to take a tour of the police department and then the firehouse.

  The firehouse was an especially big hit. The kids were allowed to climb on a hook and ladder truck. The fire bell rang while they were there. It cut short their tour, but nobody seemed to mind much, since it meant they were able to see the firefighters in action as they suited up and jumped onto the truck.

  After that, the kids stopped at the town hall. It wasn’t as exciting as seeing a celebrity, but they did meet Stoneybrook’s mayor and she showed them the town courtroom.

  At five o’clock, they returned to their meeting place in front of Pizza Express, where Mr. Pike was waiting in his car. Parked behind him were Mrs. Bruno, Mr. Ramsey, and Mrs. Hobart, all waiting to drive the kids back to the Pikes’ house. Each of the parents had brought sleeping bags for the kids.

  The caravan of cars made its way to the Pikes’ house. With excited shouts, the kids burst from the cars and ran up the driveway to the backyard. They unrolled their sleeping bags and spread them on the sand left over from the volleyball game the day before. Claudia put on the beach sounds CD, and beach party fever kicked in.

  Nicky climbed up onto his lifeguard stool and called out, “Free Swim!”

  The kids charged into the wading pools, making such a splash that Claudia, Stacey, Jessi, Mallory, and Ben had to sprint for the sleeping bags and drag them out of range.

  That night, Mr. Pike delighted the kids by building a fire inside a ring of stones he’d arranged in the yard. The kids sat around it singing campfire songs. Later they told ghost stories.

  While Logan was telling a story he called “The Witch of Gruesome Swamp,” Stacey snuck away into the house. The kids were so fascinated with Logan’s tale that they didn’t even notice she’d left. Inside, she dressed herself in a witch costume she’d found in her attic. When her black wig, big hat, and long black dress were in place, she went out the front door and sneaked toward the yard along the side of the house. Crouched at the corner of the house by the yard, she listened for her cue.

  “Then, Johnny climbed the stairs to the third floor,” she heard Logan say in a low, creepy voice. “He stood at the door at the end of the hall — the door everyone had said to stay away from. Slowly, he opened it. Slowly…. Slowly…. And then, suddenly —”

  “Out came the witch!” Stacey shrieked as she burst into the yard with her arms spread wide.

  The kids screeched in delighted terror and ran in every direction. Claudia couldn’t stop laughing. The kids laughed, too, when Stacey pulled off her hat and wig.

  At nine-thirty, Mrs. Pike announced it was time to sleep. Since the kids were tired Claudia had thought they might quiet down quickly, but that didn’t happen.

  “I have to go to the bathroom,” Hunter was the first to announce. He shined his flashlight in Logan’s face as he spoke. With his hands shielding his eyes, Logan crawled out of his sleeping bag and took his brother inside.

  By the time he was out, Margo, James, and Becca were in line outside the bathroom.

  While Logan supervised them, Claudia hunted through the kitchen trying to find crackers for Nicky, who claimed he couldn’t sleep because he was hungry (although Mrs. Pike had served them all a couple of six-foot submarine sandwiches before the campfire). They were soon joined by Stacey, who had Becca and Charlotte in tow. The girls claimed to be in desperate need of a drink of water.

  As Stacey was pouring them water, Mallory came in with three more kids who were also in need of the bathroom. She took them to the downstairs bathroom since there was still a line upstairs.

  Stacey told me she was on her way out with the girls when Margo came charging into the kitchen, yelling, “Where’s my dad? Something terrible has happened.”

  “What?” Stacey asked, feeling herself go pale.

  “The toilet is doing something weird!” she cried.

  Stacey almost collided with Mallory in the living room as they both went in search of Mr. Pike. “The upstairs toilet is flooding like crazy,” Mallory told Stacey.

  Mr. Pike appeared. “Did you say the upstairs toilet’s flooding?” he asked. Before they could answer, he was halfway up the stairs.

  It seemed someone had dropped something into the toilet. Whatever it was had caught in the pipe and wasn’t letting the water flow normally.

  Mr. Pike tried plunging it, but nothing happened, except that more and more water gushed out of the toilet and onto the floor. Next, he tried to clear the pipe with a long coil, but that didn’t work either. Finally, he had to shut off all the water in the house so he could take the pipe apart and try to find the object.

  “This is terrible,” Mallory said to Stacey. “With the water off, even the downstairs toilet won’t work! How is anyone going to use the bathroom?”

  “I know,” Stacey said. She picked up the kitchen ph
one to call her mom, since the McGills’ house is right behind the Pikes’. She explained the situation, and Mrs. McGill agreed to let them use her bathroom.

  Even though Logan, Stacey, Claudia, Mallory, Jessi, and Ben were exhausted in the morning, the kids were up bright and early. “What’s for breakfast?” Adam called out. “I’m starved.”

  Stacey, who’d taken a kid to the bathroom less than an hour earlier, cringed. She couldn’t bear the idea of getting up. To her complete delight, Mrs. Pike came out the door with a big platter of French toast. Mr. Pike was behind her with pitchers of juice. They appeared red-eyed and exhausted.

  Nicky ran to his parents. “Yum!” he cried. “You know,” he said, “this at-home vacation has been great. Let’s never take an away-vacation again!”

  Mr. and Mrs. Pike looked at each other warily. Stacey had the feeling that this was going to be the Pikes’ one and only stay-at-home vacation.

  “Oh, no!” Kristy cried suddenly. It was Saturday morning, and we were sitting on the front porch. “I have nothing to wear to the party tonight. I completely forgot it was a costume party.”

  “I didn’t,” I said with a satisfied grin. I was secretly pleased to find that I was better prepared than Kristy, who’s usually the most prepared person on earth. I stepped through the porch door into the dining room and grabbed a brown paper bag from under a side chair. I handed the bag to Kristy. “I put this costume together for you. See what you think.”

  I’d concocted it from bits and pieces I’d uncovered in Molly’s costume box.

  “I love it!” Kristy cried as she lifted the top hat from the bag. “The Mad Hatter! Who will you be?”

  “Alice,” I told her. There had been an entire Alice costume in with the props from the Off-Broadway production. It fit me perfectly.

  Gram stepped outside. She smiled at us and walked to the end of the porch. From there she could see the Wonderland she’d set up with Molly’s props and her own personal touches. She’d tied white and red balloons to poles to make the rosebushes. She and Grandpa had set up a croquet course, so that anyone who wanted to could play, just as Alice had played in the story. “Look, girls,” she said. “Your mother and Miriam stayed up half the night making this for the party.”

  Kristy and I joined Gram. Mom and Miriam were carrying a big, round tunnel into the yard. It was almost six feet high. It seemed to be constructed of wire draped with black cloth. “What is it?” I asked.

  “The rabbit hole,” Gram explained. “Before you enter Wonderland, you have to fall down the rabbit hole the way Alice did.”

  “Awesome,” Kristy said with an approving nod.

  The party was scheduled to start at three o’clock. The caterer arrived at noon and began setting up tables and filling them with awesome-looking food. There were little signs by the dishes describing what they were: Dodo donuts, mock turtle soup (chicken soup), Cheshire Cat’s Quick-to-Disappear crab legs, and the Queen of Heart’s tarts. On a separate table a sign read, THE MAD TEA PARTY. It was set up with beverages and lots of fancy sandwiches.

  I felt hungry just looking at everything! But then I thought about Gram and my appetite disappeared. How could she even think about the party preparation with all she was going through? She didn’t show any distress, though — only excitement.

  The next to arrive was the band Gram had hired. The four musicians came dressed as playing cards.

  Inside, things were hectic as everyone began putting their costumes together. “I love it!” I shouted when I saw Miriam and Daniel. She was dressed as the Duchess, with a big hoop-skirted dress and a huge headpiece, and she’d put a little pig costume on Daniel. (Remember? The crazy duchess Alice meets has a baby boy who turns into a pig.)

  “Thanks,” she said. “It seemed like a natural choice for someone who would be holding a baby.”

  “I’m late!” Grandpa Morris bellowed from the top of the stairs.

  “No, you’re not, the party isn’t until —” I stopped short when I saw his costume and began to laugh. He was dressed as the White Rabbit, complete with white fur suit, vest, and pocket watch.

  “So?” he asked, spreading his arms wide. “Is it me?”

  “It’s you,” I answered.

  Corley came to the front door with her four younger sisters. They were dressed as Alice, with blue dresses, white aprons, black Mary-jane shoes, and their wild red hair tied back with ribbons. “They all wanted to be Alice,” Corley said with a shrug. “There was nothing I could do.”

  For a moment, I panicked. How could I be Alice with all these other Alices running around? I calmed down quickly. There were bound to be repeats on all the costumes. In a way, this would add to the crazy, Wonderland feeling.

  Corley was dressed as Tweedledee. “Where’s Tweedledum?” I asked.

  “Here I am,” called Anna, hurrying down the stairs in an identical costume.

  “Actually,” Corley said, “since you and Anna are twins, the two of you should have been Tweedledee and Tweedledum.”

  “That’s okay,” I said with a laugh. “We’re twins all the time. You can have the pleasure for one day.”

  Kristy had gone upstairs to put on her costume. “How do I look?” she asked as she returned, dressed in a red long-tail jacket with a big bow tie at her neck, polka dot leggings, and the wild hat, which was just a bit too large and fell to the top of her eyes.

  “Kristy Thomas is the Mad Hatter,” I said, as if I were promoting an Alice in Wonderland movie.

  Mom came down the stairs next. She was dressed like a jack from a deck of cards. Her short dark hair peeked out from beneath a Peter Pan-style hat. She wore a flowing white blouse and stretch pants under a heavy embroidered vest on which she’d taped red hearts.

  Of all the costumes, though, Gram’s was the most unbelievable. She emerged from the kitchen completely transformed. She wore a white scarf over her hair, tied up beneath Molly’s “fabulous fake” crown. Her white faux-ermine-trimmed cape flowed behind her. But beneath the cape, she wore the funniest dress. White rubber tubing ran around a large see-through hoop in descending rings. Under that she wore frilly white pantaloons, socks, and sandals. “What do you think?” she asked when she realized we were all staring at her. “I took the design from one of the illustrations by John Tenniel, the original Alice illustrator.” She brandished her scepter and struck a pose. “Can you tell I’m the White Queen?” she asked.

  “It’s perfect,” Aunt Miriam declared as she bounced Daniel in her arms. “It’s regal yet wacky. Just the way the White Queen should be.”

  “Thank you,” said Gram. “Although I don’t know how I’ll ever sit in this thing.” She bent over to reach for something behind the dining room hutch, but the hoop skirt made this difficult.

  “Wait,” Grandpa Morris said. He went to her side and leaned over to help her. Together, they pulled out a large board covered in brown paper — the family tree.

  “You should have been the White Knight,” she joked tenderly as she patted his arm.

  “Never,” Grandpa Morris disagreed. “The White Knight in Alice was old.” He laid the board on the dining room table and looked at all of us. “Ready for the unveiling?” he asked. We nodded as he removed the brown paper. “Ta-da!” he sang out. “The Weiss-Goldberg family tree.”

  We gathered around, oohing and ahhing. It looked terrific. Each branch held pictures that led to other pictures. “What are you going to do about the blank spots?” Corley asked.

  “We’re hoping our guests can fill in the blanks for us,” Gram told her.

  Kristy nudged my arm. “What about you? You’d better go dress.”

  “You’re right!” I cried. In the excitement of seeing everyone else costumed, I’d almost forgotten about my own. I sprinted upstairs to my room and pulled the cardboard box containing my costume out from under my bed.

  As I was struggling to tie my pinafore, I heard a car pull into the driveway. I ran to my window. Pushing up the screen, I leaned out and peered d
own.

  The door was flung open, but no one came out. The sun glare on the windshield prevented me from seeing who was behind the wheel.

  In a moment, though, someone struggled out of the car.

  Humpty-Dumpty!

  Gram burst out the side door, her arms wide. “Izzy!” she cried warmly. She hugged him around his big egg costume.

  I grinned as I turned away from the window. I had helped to make Gram happy.

  At the party, several things happened that I didn’t expect. The first thing was that the Wonderland setting had a strange effect on me. The idea of everything being nutty and backward and opposite began to bother me. I felt uneasy and off balance — very much like my character, Alice, felt in Wonderland.

  Stop it, Abby, I scolded myself as I stood near the band and watched the guests arriving. What’s the matter with you?

  It didn’t take more than a minute for me to figure it out. The problem was Gram Elsie. To me it seemed so wrong that she should be sick. She appeared healthy (except for the naps). I always thought of Gram as the strong one. She was the one who supported everyone else around her. She couldn’t be sick, couldn’t be the one we would need to take care of.

  Couldn’t ever be gone.

  Yet I knew all those things were a strong possibility. And the absurd Wonderland setting magnified the unreal nature of Gram’s situation.

  I decided that had to be the reason for my uneasiness, and I ordered myself to snap out of it. Gram was happy. That was what mattered at the moment. You could see it on her face as she greeted each new arrival.

  As I stood there, thinking, Jean arrived with Sheila and Amy (all three dressed as cards). I had thought they weren’t coming. Gram looked as though she would burst with happiness. “That Abby,” I heard her cry. Jean must have told her about my call. After a quick scan of the crowd, she located me standing by the band and blew me a kiss. I blew one back to her. Way to go, Jean, I cheered silently.

  The party was truly a gala event. I should have felt happy. But I couldn’t escape the thought that maybe my grandparents had gone all out because this was the last party they would be throwing.