Turvy Topsy

by Larisa Long

“Loser,” a warlock behind me coughs.

  I put my fingers up and rub them together. Sorry dumbasses can’t even look at me to see what I’m doing. “What was that?”

  Blist glances behind him and grins. “Dray Penn. Witch it up for me.” He puts his hands together. “Please? The way he was bullying that young vampire made me sick.”

  Oh, Blist. If you only knew how I really felt … Luckily the cousins never took away my powers. I say that about fifty thousand times a day. “What should it be? Shifters choice.”

  Blist glances at Professor Georr who nods at him and then turns around. Blist learned long ago that I wouldn’t get in trouble with the teachers if he helped me. “Strip tease.”

  I cringe. “I don’t want to see that.”

  He shrugs. “Then close your eyes. You’ll know it works when you hear the heaving and shouts.”

  I laugh.

  He nods. “It’s true. My shower locker is right next to him.” He shivers. “Shocking. I had to go home sick the first time I saw him.”

  Okay, now I’m intrigued. I rub my fingers together and say the spell and whisper for the strip spell to find Dray.

  I close my eyes quickly. Sure enough, there are screams, shouts, and a few rush to the bathroom. Chairs rustle and tables creak, so he must be making his getaway. I can’t stand it so I peak when he rushes by. I wish I hadn’t. I stare at Blist who slams his lips together and laughs.

  “Warned you.”

  “Is that normal?”

  He laughs louder and shakes his head. “I’ve heard him talking to his brothers. They think it’s some kind of spell.”

  “I wish I had thought of that.”

  “You’re not that devious.”

  Then I smile. “One of B cubed thinks she’s fated to be with him.”

  Blist shifts in his chair. “Hope she doesn’t want little witchlocks. Cause that equipment ain’t doing it.”

  I laugh as I watch Blist, and it’s in these rare moments when I can forget everything. I can get lost in his eyes and his smile and pretend my life is completely normal. Just a cursed witch laughing with my jaguar shifter crush. Normal. That is until …

  The door opens loudly and then slams shut. B1 stares directly at me as she hands Professor Georr a note.

  I put my head back and sigh. I gather my books together. “See you.”

  Blist smiles at me, but his smile has much more worry behind it than normal.

  I’m at Professor Georr’s desk before he even finishes reading the note. I don’t know why he bothers. B cubed sure as shifter get themselves in a wad when my magic manages to embarrass them or their fated Penn brothers.

  “S’up B?”

  Her glare almost sets the classroom on fire.

  Professor Georr finally finishes the note and takes a deep breath before he notices that someone is standing at his desk. Since he can’t look directly at me, he looks at Blist and probably notices I’m not seated next to him. He looks down at his book. “You’re wanted in the office, Zalia Witch.”

  I nod. “Keep it real, Professor G, and keep rocking those specs.” I skip out to the sounds of Blist’s laughter.

  I continue skipping down the hall with B because the glare on her face is becoming more hilarious by the moment. I turn to say something, but a huge bag or tarp is thrown over me. I’m dragged into another room.

  Chapter 5

  I unwrap myself slowly. No one can really hurt me because they can’t touch me so I take my time to see what’s happening. At least it’s a break in the day.

  I look around to see B cubed. “Wow. B1, B2, and B4. To what do I owe?” I amuse myself. I don’t know why I’m being so bold. Of course I usually am after I’ve seen Xury. She has kick ass to spare. Maybe she gave me some of hers. She could sell it and make a fortune. She’s always complaining I’m too timid and don’t stand up for myself.

  B1 motions for B2 to step forward. I turn my attention to B2. She folds her hands over her enormous chest and taps her foot.

  Then I notice. “What the fae? Where’d you get those?” I point to her chest which I could have sworn was normal size a day ago. Not that I get into the habit of scoping out the cousins. But I mean they’re the size of one of the school’s ginormous cheesecakes they serve at every celebration.

  She looks down and then tries to keep her arms folded around them but has a hard time containing them so they squish out the sides. “Why did you have to hurt him? He’s mine. If you want him so bad …”

  I cringe and shake my head. “Are we discussing the fact that he yelled, ‘loser,’ in class?”

  The cousins laugh at that. “That’s cool.”

  “Hmm. Are we done?”

  B1 grins at me, and I’m wondering if she’s gone mad. Then I realize B2 is also looking at me, but she’s beside me. “Fae.” I peek around me, and sure enough the final B is behind me. A triangle. The mad grins. Another curse.

  “You’ve put thirty-six curses on me. Don’t you think that’s enough?”

  They shake their heads in unison, and I try to leave the circle but can’t. I close my eyes and try to counteract whatever they’re going to do, but I’m too late.

  “There. All done.”

  B1 waves her hands, and the three of them disappear.

  “Wait, what did you do this time?” That’s the last thing I remember.

  ~ ~ ~

  I wake up, and I’m still in the classroom B cubed dragged me into.

  I look down at myself. “I’m not green or disappearing. I haven’t turned to acid.” I touch my face. Should I try to make it to the bathroom? What if they’ve made my face into rotting flesh or a piece of meat. The shifters will go insane.

  I go to the door and put my ear against it. I don’t hear anything. I slowly open the door and look down the hall. No one. I tiptoe quickly down the hall, round the corner and slide into the bathroom. I close my eyes as I walk to the mirror.

  “Here it goes.” I brace myself and slowly peek. I step back. “I look normal. Blonde hair. One green eye. One blue.” I look closer. “They haven’t been switched. That would have freaked me out.” I try to think what they could have done. “I’ll ask Blist. He’ll tell me if anything’s off.”

  I rush out of the bathroom, down the hall and practically crash back into class. I throw myself down into my seat before I even realize Blist isn’t there. No one is.

  I look down at my watch. “Fae.” Already past 5. I look at our desk, but Blist hasn’t left me a note. Maybe he’s waiting outside. I know the rules state everyone has to be at their dorm floors by 6, but Blist and Xury have never left me for the day without knowing what happened to me.

  I look at all of our usual places. The second floor bathroom. The park bench by the water fountain. I peer into the atrium and try to get the attention of the faeries. I wave and jump up and down, but they don’t even glance in my direction. Weird.

  I walk towards the dorms thinking I’ll see them any minute. In the main lobby, I don’t see anyone. I hesitate at the elevators. I could just go to Blist’s floor … no. I push the button for the top floor and meander to my room.

  I don’t even have the energy to study or eat tonight. I’m so tired I fall into bed. The sound of my alarm wakes me up, and I’m shocked I’ve slept all night. I never sleep on a Monday. Not since Curse Number 23.

  That icky feeling in my stomach returns. What did the cousins do to me? What was their curse? I glance at the clock, but I’m going to be late to meet Xury and Blist so I throw open my door and spy my way to the bathroom. What will it be this time? I go through the possibilities.

  “Hey, Zalia.”

  I freeze and glance in the direction of the greeting. Three witchlocks wave at me. I turn around. They’re not looking at me. They can’t be.

  “Zalia, can we study together tonight?” Another witchlock asks smiling. “I need your help with botanicals.”

  “What in the actual fae?” I crawl back to my room and slam the door shut. “What did they d
o?” My blood pumps through veins so fast I get dizzy. “If the witchlocks can see me … if they’re actually being nice to me … no.” I throw open my door and run past witchlocks who smile at me, greet me, try to talk to me.

  I don’t waste time with the elevator, and I take the stairs all the way down to the main floor. I throw open the door and race into the lobby.

  “Nice PJs,” a witchlock says, smiling. “I was hoping you slept naked. I do.”

  I ignore him as I scan the area for Xury and Blist. They’re not here. I look at the clock on the wall. 8:12. “Fae. I’m so late.” I race back upstairs ignoring any witchlocks trying to engage.

  I throw on my uniform and race out of the dorms. I run so fast, I have to stop in front of the classroom so I don’t pass out or throw up.

  I rush in and slip into my seat and look at Blist who’s busy taking notes on his laptop.

  “Sorry, I’m late,” I say.

  Blist doesn’t look up.

  I try not to panic. I won’t panic. I close my eyes and take a breath. “What did I miss in yesterday’s class?” I ask louder.

  Blist continues with his notes, but he glances at his watch and then the door. He looks at my chair and sighs.

  “I’m right here, Blist.”

  “Zalia Witch,” Professor Georr says.

  I glance up and then stare at him. I jump in my seat. The man’s actually looking at me. Directly at me. With both of his beady eyes. I definitely wasn’t ready for this.

  I glance around the classroom, and everyone’s looking at me. At least the witchlocks are. They’re looking at me the same way Professor Georr is looking at me. “This is weird. Blist …” I turn back around, but he still won’t look at me. “Blist?”

  He doesn’t even pause his fingers as they race across the keyboard.

  I study him, and my stomach clenches. “Blist, look at me.”

  Nothing.

  I close my eyes and glance around the classroom again. “Yep.” Only the witchlocks are looking at me now. None of the other species can. I curl my fists together.

  Various witchlocks are at my table in an instant.

  “What happened?” A witch who barely even looked at me before the curse is suddenly staring at me with tears in her eyes. “Whoever has harmed you is my enemy, and I will destroy them with the force of my ancestors.”

  Okay.

  Dray Warlock gets on his knees. “I forgive you for what you did, and I’ll get myself fixed. Just for you. Only for you. I am yours.” He looks at me with his best impression of seduction. I guess. His eyelids somewhat droop, and he attempts a smile. He looks more like he’s about to pass out. “Tell me what I can do. I am your humble servant.”

  The classroom door is practically thrown off it’s hinges as Raks rushes into the room. “Where is she? Where is my soul mate?” He sees me and falls to his knees. “There you are. My love. My everything. My fate. My destiny. My one.”

  I turn to Blist who is still working away on his computer. I put my head back. “I’m so fae’d.”

  Just then B cubed rush past the witchlocks all vying for my attention. “We have a problem,” B4 says.

  “Really? Do tell.”

  She shakes her head. “You really don’t know?”

  I sigh. “What the fae did you do?”

  “We sort of messed up the curse,” B2 says.

  “No shift.”

  “It’s so not our fault,” B1 says, looking at her new manicure. “You deserved it.”

  “For fae’s sake. What did you do?” I put my hands up to stop their explanation. I know what they did. They somehow reversed the spell so that all the witches now acknowledge my existence. I look down at Dray and Raks as well as several others who are looking at me with that look.

  Okay, so they amped the spell so it’s a lust spell or something. I glance at the non witches and non warlocks. None of them even acknowledge what’s going on. I watch Blist. That means I lose my best friends.

  Chapter 6

  I jump out of my seat and push past my insanely adoring fans. I have to hesitate because I touched them. I mean I shoved them, but I actually felt it. None of them burst into flames. I glare at the cousins. “It’s always a spit in my coffee and kick in the crotch with you three, isn’t it?”

  I rush out of the classroom door, and feel them follow me. I get to the hallway and spell the door so it won’t open. Not right away anyway.

  I pace back and forth. “What the fae am I going to do now?” I can’t lose Blist or Xury. I can’t. I won’t. The more I think of the cousins, the more pixied I get. “What the fae did I ever do to them?”

  There’s a commotion down the hall. I hear gasps and screams. “Now what?”

  Several students linger in the hallway but none are witches or warlocks so they pay no attention to me. All of a sudden, they stop what they are doing and bow.

  “Son of a banshee.” That could only be one thing. I try to get back into the classroom, but the door won’t open even for me.

  “Zalia,” my aunt’s voice finds me. Granted I haven’t heard her speak directly to me in three years, but I’d recognize her overly sweet and completely fake voice anywhere.

  I turn around as Queen Ama waits for me to acknowledge her. She looks like a human twenty and always dresses with the latest fashions. She’s much more beautiful than her smirk faced spawn. I bow my head as a headache pounds at me from the inside out like a tiny cursed faerie is knocking from inside my brain. Curse Number 6 totally blows. “Queen Ama.”

  “Please,” Queen Ama throws her hands in the air before she grabs me in a hug. “Call me Queen Aunt.”

  She squeezes way too hard, and much too long as the King has time to slowly walk down the hallway, acknowledge his subjects and wait for his wife to finish her hug. The King is dressed in his uniform with hundreds of medals across his chest. Handsome and very regal just like my dad looked.

  Oh no. I thought about my father. That’s an origin story. I get images of being scooped out of a nest of eagles. The King and Queen were about to scramble me, but I hatched out of the egg into the skillet, and they raised me.

  I look at the King who looks at me with apologetic eyes. Don’t know if he’s apologizing for his daughters, his wife’s lung gouging grip or for something I don’t know about yet.

  As soon as my aunt releases me, I bow my head. “King Philock.”

  “Zalia,” he says, smiling. “We’ve missed you.”

  “How?” I didn’t mean it, but it just came out.

  Queen Ama laughs at me. “Oh, Zalia, you remind me so much of your mother.”

  I nod. I so want to ask what happened to my parents, but I need to pace out my freak outs and the weird origin stories.

  “She and I were the best of friends.” She grabs hold of her husband’s hand. “I do believe the King had his eyes on her before he met me.”

  The King looks away, and I could almost swear I saw a hint of a tear. “She was always taken with my brother.”

  “Yes,” Queen Ama says, gritting her teeth probably hoping her husband had given a much more lengthy and more Ama pleasing reaction. “But if she hadn’t married your brother, then we wouldn’t have Zalia. Where have you been staying?”

  Trick question?

  “You haven’t been at the castle all this time, have you?”

  “No …” I wait for her to realize, but I’ll have to wait for a very long time. “I’m at the Academy …”

  She looks at the King and shrugs but doesn’t have the interest to inquire further. I can’t blame her too much. No one has ever been able to count all the rooms in the castle. It’s made of brick and stone and dragon’s blood if the rumors are to be believed. Most of the rooms change around at whim or hide themselves. Two of those charged with counting them have yet to reappear.

  The classroom behind me gets noisier.

  “What is going on in there?” The King asks. “Is that still crystal class?”

  “Yes.” I shrug. “I don�
��t know what’s going on.” Not a total lie. “I was called out of class.”

  “Uh oh.” Queen Aunt pulls a pouty face. “What did you do? Tell your favorite Queen aunt.”

  Yikes. I think I prefer her to ignore me. “Strip spell to Dray Penn.”

  The King has to stop his grin, while the Queen blushes. She grabs my arm. “Zalia, if you should require advice on the more romantic realm, you can talk to me about anything.”

  I nod politely and sigh inwardly. Ha. Right. By the by, your daughters are total faeheads who’ve spelled me with now thirty-seven different curses. One of which—

  The door is torn off it’s hinges, and the King grabs me and pushes me behind him to protect me.

  When everyone inside spills out, they freeze. All of their eyes widen, and they fall to their knees and bow their heads quickly.

  “What is the meaning of this?” The King asks.

  Professor Georr clears his throat. He stammers in starts and stops. “My King, please forgive the intrusion. I see you were conversing with your niece and would never suppose to interrupt your most personal business.”

  The King raises his hand to stop the groveling. “What is happening here?”

  His daughters push, shove, kick and maybe spit their way through the crowd.

  “Daddy,” B1 pouts. She throws herself into his arms.

  I wonder what fresh vampire spit she’s going to shovel.

  She steps back from him and then looks at her parents with actual tears poised on her huge, fake lime green lashes.

  Yikes.

  “Okay, totally not our fault.” She throws a glare my way, and I wonder if I should pack now for banishment or if they’ll be stores along the way.

  “Okay …” She stops and waves frantically in front of her eyes.

  The lime green mascara must sting. Good. I smile and then grimace as my shins ache. Fae Curse Number 6.

  “I’m good.” B1 takes a deep breath. “We’ve put thirty-six and now thirty-seven different curses on Zalia.”

  I stand there with my mouth wide open. What the fae is this? Honesty? I tense and wait for more.

  The Queen glares at me. “Why did you not come to me, Zalia? We’ve always been so close.”