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A Secret to Forgive

Page 12

by Tricia Saxby


  More words of wisdom, and how true they were, Karen thought.

  “He has a secret. A big one that he’s not willing to share, even after all this time. How am I supposed to trust him?”

  “Secrets are not wise.”

  “I know. What could possibly be so bad that he doesn’t think I’d understand? Unless he killed someone, he really has nothing to worry about.”

  The front desk bell rang and Bea dashed out of the room. She sure could move fast for a lady in her seventies, Karen thought.

  Karen walked back to the kitchen island and tried her hand at forming buns. She filled the baking pan and placed it with the others to rise. Hers were smaller, but she hoped Bea wouldn’t mind.

  Leo and Walter returned as she was kneading the remaining dough for the last batch.

  “How did it go?” Karen asked as she brushed at the flour that covered the front of her dress.

  “Really well. There’s way more to this property than I imagined. And you’ve taken a new post as kitchen assistant, I see.”

  Karen could picture the smirk on his face, but she refused to look. “Bea entrusted me with her special bun-forming technique…and she’s a way better boss.”

  Leo grinned. “How hard will it be to tear you away from all this?”

  Karen hesitated long enough to see Leo’s brow crease in worry. “I’m in no hurry to get back.”

  “I know, but…”

  “You will stay for lunch, then you can go.” Bea rushed back into the kitchen and took Karen’s post. “Go wash up,” she added, and with expert precision she had the rest of the buns ready to go in record time.

  With no more time to talk about what awaited them when they returned to Vale Designs, Karen and Leo pitched in to prepare a simple meal of fresh buns, cold cuts, cheese and pickles, and, of course, wine. Conversation centered around the property, with questions and observations Leo had regarding the vineyard.

  Karen couldn’t help but notice how excited Leo sounded. He’d borrowed her notebook and started taking his own notes and doodling images she didn’t recognize of the yard.

  If only he could see past the issues he had with his family and embrace what he was so obviously good at. He even had Walter and Bea excited about the future prospects.

  And maybe, just maybe, he’d stay in New York.

  But would she? It really depended on Natasha’s wrath. Even if Natasha didn’t fire her, could she live with the daily tirades that would be so much worse?

  Perhaps a new job search was in order. Something a little more prestigious than assistant. She took a long sip of her wine and pictured the gown on her dress form in her room. It was almost complete, and she itched to be home to apply the finishes Anna had suggested. She’d sent her pictures before leaving on her Valentine’s date, and Anna had replied right away. Anna’s excitement over the project had boosted Karen’s much-needed confidence, and thoughts of wanting more out of a job than fetching coffee for the evil witch of New York bloomed.

  After the meal, Bea put Karen and Leo to work at the sink washing and drying the dishes as she packed a basket of buns and homemade strawberry jam for them to take home. The normalcy of this household chore gave the moment an intimacy she didn’t think possible, and a small spark of excitement took hold. Her feelings for Leo were more than an infatuation with their past relationship. She loved the man he was today. Karen’s heart raced as she glanced over at Leo, who turned to grab more dirty dishes from the counter. Fear soon replaced excitement as she thought about the secret he kept from her. Feeling a bit woozy, she grabbed onto the sink’s edge to steady herself.

  He’s leaving in a few days, her subconscious whispered. Then what? Real love and secrets didn’t mix, no matter how much she wanted Bea to be right.

  Half an hour later, with chores complete and basket in hand, Karen embraced Bea in a tight hug. “I’ve known you for less than twenty-four hours and I’m sad to be leaving.”

  “Be strong and patient. Your man will smarten up soon,” Bea whispered near her ear.

  Karen pulled away. “How do you…?”

  Bea touched her heart and Karen smiled. Oh, how she wanted to believe her. “Thank you.”

  Walter, with his tractor, guided them to the highway. All the snow had melted into slush puddles scattered across the road. With conversation at a minimum, Karen kept her eyes on the road and the music low so Leo could concentrate. It took an extra hour to reach the city, and with each passing minute her anxiety increased.

  Leo was unable to find a parking spot anywhere in the vicinity of the office building, so Karen asked to be dropped off out front.

  “I’ll find a spot and meet you up there. Don’t do anything stupid,” Leo advised before pulling away from the curb.

  “Thanks for the words of encouragement,” Karen mumbled. She faced the door, took a deep breath, and with head held high, marched inside and onto the elevator.

  »»•««

  Leo had to park five blocks away. “This is why I have a chauffeur,” he muttered as he flipped his coat collar up to ward off the biting wind. Out at Bea and Walter’s it’d been calm and sunny. Back in the city, snow had started falling again and the sky was gray and gloomy. From clouds or smog, he couldn’t tell.

  As he trudged down the slush-covered sidewalk, his cell phone rang. Leo glanced at the screen, which flashed a picture of his dad, and he pressed the talk button.

  “Hey, Dad.”

  “Did you get a chance to look at that property in Hudson Valley?” Leo got his bad phone manners from his father.

  “It’s a B&B, Dad. A real gem.”

  His father sighed. “We don’t have time to invest in a B&B, Leo, let alone learn anything about running one.”

  “They have a vineyard.”

  “Oh, good. What are the specs?”

  “About five acres.”

  “Tiny—”

  “Good crop, and the wine is delicious,” Leo interjected.

  His father grunted. “Not worth our time. I’ll tell your mother.”

  “Dad?” Leo spoke into the phone, but there was only silence. He ended the call, tucked the phone into his jacket pocket, and swore.

  His father may just have well said, “You’re not worth our time.”

  Damn him. What had gotten his goat anyway? Leo wondered. In all honesty, his father was usually the most pleasant one in the family. Did the meetings in France not go well? Did he and Mom get into a fight? Yes, that sounded more reasonable. They had at least three big fights throughout the year. It was February. Valentine’s Day? Nah, his mother didn’t care about that frivolous day.

  No anniversaries to forget. Birthdays…

  Yes…a specific birthday. Leo stopped on the spot as his heart raced, and an instant headache pounded on his temples.

  Today was his sister’s birthday—would have been her birthday.

  Leo’s mind started to race. How could he possibly have forgotten? The surrounding buildings seemed to close in around him and his breathing became labored. He needed to get out of there. He spun around and headed back to his car as flashes of his sister, Emily, popped in his head. A swimming pool, Emily laughing…then silence. He’d jumped into the water and grabbed her, but he was too late. She was dead.

  Leo broke out in a cold sweat. Where the hell was his car? He ran a block, then two, and finally found his car parked outside a rundown pub. He took in his surroundings and noticed most of the neighboring buildings matched the look of the pub. Situated behind a greasy and dusty solitary window was a flashing red “Open” sign. Feeling reckless and thirsty, Leo went inside.

  The interior showed no better than the outside. It was dark and dingy; a single light bulb hung above the only pool table, and the area behind the bar was lit by cheesy fluorescent signs depicting naked women. The overwhelming scent of stale beer assaulted his nostrils.

  A burly man with a full beard, shiny bald head, and tattooed arms stood behind the counter organizing bottles.

&nbs
p; “What can I get ya?” the man grumbled without a glance in Leo’s direction.

  He shouldn’t be there. Hell, he shouldn’t be in New York. He should be home paying his respects at his sister’s grave.

  “Ya going to decide or what?” The bartender’s growl was much louder now that Leo had his attention.

  “Scotch on the rocks.” Decision made, Leo sat on the stool across from the bartender and slowly massaged his temples. The place matched his mood—dark and dangerous. “Leave the bottle.”

  »»•««

  The elevator opened, and Karen stepped into the Vale Designs foyer. It was four o’clock in the afternoon and business as usual from what she could see. She didn’t want anyone to see her and she sure as hell didn’t want to talk to anyone, so instead of going to her desk, as would be her norm, she headed straight to Natasha’s office.

  After knocking twice, Karen opened the door. Natasha was sitting at her desk, phone to her ear, chewing on a pencil end. Once Karen was spotted, Natasha hung up on whoever was babbling in her ear and placed the pencil gently on the desk.

  “Do you know what day it is?” Natasha asked as she stood and rounded her desk.

  “Of course.” Karen bristled at the question but kept calm.

  “Do you know what day it is?” Natasha repeated.

  “Thursday,” Karen enunciated slowly.

  “Do you work on Thursdays?” Natasha sat on the corner of her desk and folded her hands in her lap.

  “Yes.”

  “Were you at work today?”

  Oh, this is ridiculous! “You know I wasn’t at work today.” So much for keeping her cool.

  “And yesterday, where were you then?”

  “On a photo shoot with Leo—”

  “On a photo shoot, my ass.” Natasha rose and crossed the span between them in three long strides.

  “You okayed it!”

  “I didn’t know—”

  “You know all goings on here.”

  Natasha said nothing, her gaze drawn to the door. “Where is Leo, by the way? I thought he’d be here to back you up.”

  Good question. He knew how much she needed him. “He’s on his way up. He went to park the car.”

  “His Porsche?”

  Karen frowned. “Yes.”

  “Love that car.” Natasha returned to her chair. “I’m surprised he has it out in this weather.” Her concern sounded syrupy and fake.

  “It wasn’t ideal. It took an extra hour to get back to the city.”

  Natasha’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “I didn’t approve an out-of-town photo shoot, especially in the middle of winter.”

  Karen winced at her error. “I’m sure Leo wouldn’t have gone behind your back and booked something on his own.” Or would he?

  “I wouldn’t put it past him…or you.”

  “Me? I did nothing but go on this assignment with your blessing. I can’t control the weather or the unfortunate means of transportation.”

  “I needed you here.”

  For what? Her daily coffee run? “I tried—”

  “I doubt it.” Natasha flicked her hand in dismissal.

  Something snapped in Karen’s head. Flick that hand again.

  Natasha stood, her gaze never leaving Karen, and flicked her hand so hard and fast her wrist cracked. Karen’s eyes widened in surprise, while Natasha’s mocked her.

  “You were never good at keeping your thoughts to yourself.”

  “And you were never good at being nice.”

  She’d overstepped her bounds. Natasha’s eyes closed to mere slits and her mouth pulled into a tight line.

  “You’re the worst assistant ever,” Natasha spat back.

  “And you are the world’s meanest boss.” Karen couldn’t keep her true thoughts from stumbling out her mouth.

  Why were they doing this? Acting like a couple of spoiled brats in a who-could-say-the-meanest-thing-ever contest.

  Catching her off guard, Natasha jabbed her finger into Karen’s chest and pushed as hard as she could. Karen grabbed onto Natasha’s arm to keep from falling back.

  “I hate you.” Natasha’s voice was eerily calm.

  “The feeling is mutual.” Karen sneered.

  They stood facing each other, neither backing down. After a few minutes of silence, Natasha’s harsh demeanor returned and she forced out a sarcastic laugh.

  “I have no idea why Leo wastes his time with you,” Natasha said.

  With that barb well-aimed, Karen loosened her grip on Natasha’s arm and sat on the couch. Her heart was like a heavy weight in her chest. She’d so often asked herself that same question.

  “Look, Leo has nothing to do with this—”

  “Of course he does.” Natasha smoothed out her long locks and stood on shaky legs. “You may think because you were stranded with him overnight that you guys are an item now. Well, you can forget it. He’s not relationship material. He has so many ghosts haunting him.”

  “Trying to scare me away so you can continue pursuing him by flaunting yourself like a show horse?”

  A prickling of doubt crept into her heart as Natasha’s smile widened.

  “Oh, I’ll always have a special place in Leo’s heart. Unlike you. You’re a passing fancy. Someone to keep him entertained while he’s away from home.”

  “We’re old friends,” Karen said, but she knew how weak that sounded.

  “Old friends, hey? You know about his sister then?”

  His sister? “Of course.”

  Natasha laughed at her shaky attempt at confidence. “Apparently not.”

  “You’ll say anything to hurt me. You’ve made it your number one mission since I arrived here.”

  “I’m trying to toughen you up. The fashion world is very cutthroat.”

  “You treat no one else at Vale Designs with such disrespect.” Karen’s chest ached where Natasha poked her, and her heart felt bruised. “And I’ve had enough.”

  Natasha’s surprise should’ve had Karen floating around the room in elation, but her lack of sleep the night before, the nerve-wracking drive back to the city, and their physical confrontation left her drained. To top it off, it appeared Leo had left her hanging again. All his promises of being around for her were just empty puffs of smoke.

  Maybe Natasha was right. She’d hoped after spending the night reconnecting with Leo that he’d changed. Foolish.

  And what about his sister? He’d never mentioned her before. To be honest, Karen hadn’t even known he had a sister.

  “Tell me about Leo’s sister.”

  Natasha sighed and started pacing the space between the couch and her desk. “It’s not really my story to tell…”

  Frustration rose in Karen’s chest, pushing down the hurt. “Why did you mention her in the first place?”

  “Because…” Natasha stopped in front of Karen and wrapped her arms around her midsection. “I can see how much you adore him, and I wanted to pop that illusion.”

  “You love him?”

  “No.”

  “Oh, come on!”

  “I used to…when we were teenagers.”

  Right. Karen remembered Leo telling her about their high school friendship when they were in the women’s washroom the other day—after the whole stealing-last-year’s-design fiasco. An old friendship would explain why they were so at ease with each other. She envied that.

  “He’s always been the one that got away, but I’ve settled for what we have now.” Back in her chair, Natasha spun around to face the windows.

  Settled? Did romantic emotions still linger for her? It made sense that she wanted to sabotage any plans Karen had for a relationship. Did Leo know how unhealthy Natasha’s feelings were?

  “How’s mentioning Leo’s sister going to pop my illusions?”

  Natasha stood and walked over to the windows. A mild smirk played at the corners of her mouth. “She’s his ghost.”

  Karen paled and a chill ran up her spine. His ghost? “She’s dead?”
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br />   “Yes. She’s been dead for ten years,” a low voice rumbled behind her.

  Karen jumped off the couch and turned to see Leo standing in the doorway. She wanted to berate him for taking so long, but then she noticed how his posture was slouched and how his hair looked messy from the wind…or from running his hands through it one too many times. Something was wrong.

  “Leo?” Karen walked slowly toward him, afraid to scare him off.

  “Emily is dead,” Leo blurted out. He tried to stand up straight, but he fell back against the doorframe.

  “You’re drunk.” Anger ripped through Karen like nothing she’d ever experienced. He’d gone to a bar to get drunk instead of being by her side.

  Leo hiccupped. “You bet.”

  Karen grabbed her purse and coat. A raging storm swirled inside her at the betrayal, but disappointment sat like a boulder on her heart. Tears welled in her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. When she spoke, it was barely more than a whisper.

  “I’m done—with both of you.” She turned to Natasha. “I quit.”

  Then she turned back to Leo and swallowed the huge lump of emotion caught in her throat. “I never want to see you again.”

  And she walked out without a second glance.

  Chapter Nine

  Leo popped two extra-strength ibuprofens and downed the glass of water Robert handed him. His head pounded like a jackhammer against each temple, making him nauseous.

  If Robert hadn’t pinged his phone and found him in that rundown bar halfway into that terrible bottle of scotch, Leo would have been in way worse shape.

  Now, looking out his living room window at the glistening streetlights below, he could feel the judgment in Robert’s stare.

  “Is there anything else you need before I retire for the night, sir?”

  Leo knew if there were anything else, he wouldn’t dare speak it. “No, I’m good. Thank you.”

  Robert nodded and gathered his coat. “I will see you in the morning then.”

  Leo nodded, not taking his eyes off his reflection in the window. The afternoon played through his mind like an old movie reel. Robert swooping in on him and grabbing the bottle out of his hand. Leo trying to wrestle it away, to no avail. The bartender helping Robert get him into the limo, and then Robert refusing to talk to him after asking where Karen had gone.

 

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