Little Jack

by Atlas, Lilly

  “That’s perfect for me. Gives me time to test a few new ideas out.”

  “Okay,” Toni said as she reached for one of the peanut butter brownies Holly had brought along. “I worked out today, so don’t judge me for eating two of these. Enough shop talk. I want to hear what’s going on with you and LJ, Holly.”

  “Oooh yes!” Jazz said as her eyes lit. “I’ve been dying to know what the deal is there. Spill, girlfriend.” She rubbed her hands together as though about to dive into a juicy steak.

  “Oh, well, uh…” Did Holly really want to talk about the strange quasi-thing she had going on with LJ? She’d already jumped off the ledge where he was concerned, now she’d taken a job working at a diner deeply connected to the MC. Confiding in these women would only strengthen their budding friendships. Did she want that? Okay, yes, she did. But should she want that? No. Not at all. Her family would never understand. They’d think her disloyal to Joy’s memory, though Joy would probably be the first one hanging out at the clubhouse, were she alive today. But she wasn’t alive, and her death had been caused by an outlaw MC member.

  It was so complicated, her head throbbed.

  “Here.” Toni refilled Holly’s wineglass with a mischievous grin. “Suck this down, then tell us. Whatever you say won’t leave this room. Promise, girl.” She crossed her finger in an X over her heart. “Gashes before ’stashes.”

  “Ugh,” Jazz wrinkled her nose. “Next time go with chicks before dicks.”

  “Huh, that is a little less offensive, isn’t it?” Toni said as she crossed her legs and tilted her head as though she had all night to wait for Holly to spill her guts.

  Holly heaved a sigh before swallowing a huge gulp of her drink. The flavor of the expensive vintage barely registered. She’d already committed the ultimate sin by pursuing her connection to LJ. So…in for a penny, in for a pound. A sentiment that would be oh, so comforting when her mother cried and her father blew a gasket over this. “Okay, fine, but you promise to keep it quiet?” She’d tell her parents when she was ready. Not when small-town gossip took the choice from her.

  “You got it,” Toni said.

  “Promise.” Jazz said.

  “That’s not enough. Put a hand on the plate of brownies.”

  With a giggle, Toni said, “What? Why?”

  “Shh, just do it.”

  Also chuckling, Jazz scooted to the edge of the recliner and leaned forward, placing her hand on the large platter of brownies which was resting on Toni’s coffee table.

  Both women looked to Toni, who rolled her eyes but followed suit. Holly’s hand joined her new friends’.

  “Wait,” Toni said. “Why are you doing it too, Holly?”

  With a shrug, Holly said, “I didn’t want to be left out.”

  That had both Jazz and Toni cracking up.

  “Okay,” Holly said then cleared her throat. “Let’s get serious for a second. Repeat after me: I solemnly swear…”

  “I solemnly swear…” Toni and Jazz parroted.

  “To keep my trap shut…”

  “To keep my trap shut…”

  “No matter how much I want to gossip and share Holly’s business.”

  They repeated the sentence.

  “If I break this vow…”

  “If I break this vow…”

  “May I never have a brownie again.”

  “What?” Toni practically shrieked. “That’s harsh!”

  “May I never have brownies again,” Jazz said. “Say it, Toni.”

  With a huff, Toni said, “Fine. May I never eat a brownie again. Happy?”

  “Very,” said Holly as she smiled. “Okay, me and LJ. We met the night I moved into my apartment. LJ literally ran into me as I was carrying stuff up the stairs. He helped me unpack my car and bring a bunch of heavy boxes to the apartment where it turned out he was my next-door neighbor.”

  “We know this part. Get to the sexy times.” Toni said, refilling her own glass, then passing the bottle to Jazz.

  “How do you know there were sexy times?”

  “Uhh, have you seen the man? Pretty sure no woman alive could resist all those muscles and that sexy bald head. And oooh the beard!” Jazz said with a dramatic shiver that quickly turned into a frown as a scant amount of wine poured into her glass. “You bitch!” With puppy dog eyes and a pathetic pout, she turned her attention to Toni.

  “Keep your panties on. There’s another bottle in the kitchen.”

  Jazz hopped up. “Wait until I get back to finish the story. Unless you’re just telling stuff I know. Then you can say it. And please, bitch, you only wish I’d take these panties off for you.” As she walked to the kitchen, she gave a little butt shimmy.

  Holly couldn’t keep the grin off her face. These women were the best. Kind, welcoming, fun, hilarious, a good time all around. Meeting them, befriending them helped ease some of her fear and uncertainty about the MC. Would these women, these strong, independent women tie themselves to the club if it was full of rapists, murderers, and drug runners? Holly just couldn’t picture it. None of them seemed abused or poorly treated. In fact, from what she saw at the party, the men of the Hell’s Handlers MC treated their women better than most.

  “Okay, I’m back,” Jazz announced as she walked in the room with a full glass and a new bottle of wine. “Continue.”

  “Oh, thank you for the permission.” Holly smirked at her new friend. “Okay, so LJ and I met a few times and had some instant, sparks-flying chemistry.” Her face heated as she admitted. “I’m pretty sure I’ve never had such a strong and immediate attraction to anyone before. Uh, the night before the party at the clubhouse, he invited me to go, but my dad showed up and kinda killed the moment.”

  Toni snorted. “Yeah, that would do it. Sheriff dad popping in on a one-percenter trying to get with his daughter.” With a wince, she shook her head. “Don’t envy you that one.”

  “Yeah, it wasn’t pretty. Anyway, I canceled the date, or whatever it was supposed to be. Then Jazz asked me to hang out Saturday night, and I ended up at the clubhouse anyway.”

  “Oh, my God,” Jazz said, wide-eyed and hand over her mouth.

  “I can see you laughing behind your hand.”

  “I’m sorry.” This time her giggle broke free. “It’s just, now I get why you were so freaked out about going to the clubhouse.”

  That and the fact part of her seriously wondered if she’d make it out of an outlaw MC’s lair alive, which she was now ashamed to admit. Especially sitting in the home of one of the members.

  “Yeah, you could say it was awkward. But, anyway, we had words at the party then we…”

  “Had sex?” Toni asked with a toothy smile. “Please tell me you had sex.”

  “Uhh, you realize we’re talking about Holly having sex, not you, right?” Jazz asked.

  Toni waved the hand holding her wine glass. “Please, if I had any more sex, my brain would dissolve.”

  “Rub it in why don’t you,” Jazz mumbled into her glass.

  “We didn’t have sex-sex. We had…other sex.”

  “Did you come?” Toni asked.

  “Um, yes,” Holly answered in a squeak.

  “Good enough,” Jazz said. “Did he come?”

  With the heat wafting off her face, it had to be cherry-red. “Nope. Zach knocked on the door to tell us the cops had arrived before we got to that part.”

  “Ohh, poor LJ,” Jazz said.

  “Right!” Holly said after taking another sip. “That’s what I thought, and believe me, I was more than willing to pay that debt. But here’s the kicker, after the police left, LJ dragged me out back where we made out against the building for a while, then, when I thought we’d head to his room, he passed me off to you, Jazz, and that was that. As you know since you took me home, I just went to my apartment. Alone. What the hell?”

  She’d been left confused and feeling rejected as she slipped into her lonely bed. Had it been the raid? Did Schwartz’s obnoxious behavior ser
ve as an in-his-face reminder of her close connection to law enforcement? That fact hadn’t seemed to bother him earlier in the night when he had his head buried between her legs, but then again, his club hadn’t been turned upside down by the cops at that point.

  How would this ever work? She’d been delusional to think she could sustain any kind of relationship with LJ, purely physical or otherwise. This had disaster written all over it in big block letters made by a permanent Sharpie.

  “Hmm,” Jazz said as she tapped her chin with a black painted nail. “That’s interesting. I can tell you this, that man wants you. It was clear in the way he stalked you with his hungry eyes all night long, so don’t go thinking that’s the problem.”

  “So, what? I’d get it if he wanted a mash and dash, but the guy didn’t even get so much as a hand in his pants. And I was more than willing. I’d even go so far as to say I was eager to pick up where we left off.”

  Both women broke out into fits of giggles. Jazz laughed so hard her wine sloshed to the top of her glass. “Oh, shit,” she said as she set it down. “First this one says ‘gashes before staches.’” She jerked her thumb in Toni’s direction. “And now, did you just say mash and dash?”

  “Oh, yeah, I guess so. Saw it in a Facebook post.” She waved it away. “We’re getting off topic. The moral of this story is that LJ and I aren’t a thing. I was rejected, big time.” She lifted her glass to her lips only to remain dry-mouthed. Ugh, why was her wine glass empty already?

  “I don’t know about that. He’s pretty hush-hush about his…let’s call them rendezvous,” Toni said.

  Jazz nodded and grabbed her glass again. “He is. Never really hooks up with anyone around the clubhouse that I’ve seen. Only that one girl who started spreading rumors about the size of his dick.” She wagged her eyebrows. “All good things, I promise. Maybe he just doesn’t like to get busy in the clubhouse.”

  Holly frowned. They had a perfectly good apartment—two of them—just a short ride away. And he had no problem going down on her in his room at the clubhouse. “Maybe.” She flopped back onto the couch. “Let’s talk about something besides my pathetic love life, please.”

  The sound of a door opening was followed quickly by Zach’s, “Hey, sexy lady! Good news is your man’s home. Bad news is I had some stray dogs follow me from the gym.”

  “Fuck you, man,” came the laughing reply.

  Jazz snapped straight in her seat as her face blanched.

  Holly leaned her forearms on her knees. “You okay?”

  “What? Oh yeah, I’m fine. It’s nothing. Just—”

  “Well hot damn. Hit the fucking jackpot tonight. Brownies and my girl.” Screw strode into the room. He wasn’t nearly as big as LJ, and probably an inch shorter than Zach, but the man’s confident swagger made him the biggest man in the room.

  “Screw,” Jazz finished.

  Screw grabbed a brownie and took a bite, moaning while he walked straight for Jazz. All three men wore jeans and their Handler’s cuts, but LJ and Zach had T-shirts under theirs where Screw had what appeared to be a white wife-beater. The man was jacked and didn’t seem shy about letting everyone know it.

  Holly’s eyebrows rose. “Did he call you his girl?” she mouthed to Jazz who rolled her eyes and shook her head.

  “Don’t ask,” was mouthed back to her.

  “Damn, I missed you today, baby,” Zach said right before he pulled Toni to her feet and into a scorching kiss complete with ass fondling.

  Rather than gawk like some kind of creeper, Holly looked away and right into the eyes of LJ.

  Why the hell did he have to look so damn delicious? The freaking T-shirt he wore seemed seconds away from splitting in two from the strain of keeping his bulging muscles covered. With a bandana around his head, his beard recently trimmed, and a freshly showered smell, Holly was in danger of spontaneously combusting.

  “Oh, uh, hey,” she said, rubbing her suddenly damp palms on her sweatpants.

  Damn, her sex was so slick she could give lessons to lube.

  He walked straight to her and slipped his arms under hers. One quick yank and she was flush against his body. “Hey, sugar,” he said. “Gonna give me a taste of all that sweetness?”

  Huh? He wanted to kiss her? Hello, mixed signals flying in from every angle. He must have seen the confusion on her face because he said, “We’ll talk later,” then gave her a quick but dizzying kiss.

  Okay, so we’re talking later.

  After he fried her circuits with his lips, LJ sat on the couch and pulled her onto his lap. For a moment, she remained stiff, then decided, fuck it. She had a hot man wanting to kiss her, touch her, and hang out with her. This was something to enjoy, not overanalyze. Obsessing could come later.

  On the opposite end of the couch, Zach and Toni sat much as she and LJ did with Toni on Zach’s lap except he kept trying to sneak his hands under his woman’s shirt only to have them slapped away by a giggling Toni.

  Then there was Jazz and Screw, the duo Holly couldn’t help but gawk at. Screw had pulled Jazz onto his lap as well, but Holly’s new friend sat rigid as a statue.

  “You ladies working on adding some of Holly’s stuff to the menu?” Zach asked as he nuzzled his nose in the crook of Toni’s neck.

  LJ gave her waist a squeeze, almost as though he was proud of her new job. But that was ridiculous. Why the hell would he care?

  “Actually,” Toni said, shooting a raised eyebrow in Jazz’s direction. Jazz just shook her head and finally settled back against Screw. He whispered something in her ear that had her relaxing even further. “We decided to create a To-Go option for customers who don’t have time to linger in the mornings. We’re going to turn part of the counter into a quick-grab section. This way, people heading to work can stop and grab a coffee and a pastry on the run. Holly’s going to work that portion of the counter and we’ll have an assortment of baked goods each day. What do you think?”

  “Shit, babe, I think that sounds like a fucking great idea.” With Toni still on his lap, Zach reached forward and snagged a brownie. After taking a giant bite, he said, “And if the breakfast shit is half as good as this, they’ll be lined up around the building.”

  The concept was a simple one. Holly running a breakfast-to-go counter. It wasn’t her restaurant, hadn’t been her idea, wasn’t even her completely choosing the menu, yet her blood zinged, and excitement had her practically hopping up to do a happy dance. Best part of the entire thing was the diner would pay for all the supplies and ingredients and Holly would make a regular paycheck plus have access to the diner for her online customers.

  Resting his head on her shoulder, LJ whispered. “That’s fucking great news, sugar.”

  “Thanks.”

  “What do you say we get out of here and go celebrate?”

  “Yeah?” Butterflies took flight in her stomach. When he looked at her like that, with a heavy-lidded hunger, she felt like a school girl with a mega crush. All giddy with anticipation.

  “Yeah. We’ll steal a bottle of wine from Z and Toni, then take a ride into the mountains. Bet you haven’t had a chance to check out some of the overlooks yet, have you?”

  Parking at a scenic overlook with LJ? High school Holly would have died and gone to heaven, had she known what was in store for adult Holly. A pack of rabid wildebeests couldn’t keep her away. “Let’s do it.”

  LJ kissed her, a little longer and deeper this time, until she clung to the open flaps of his cut rather than melt into a pile of goo. After he ended it, he stood and set her on the couch before sweet-talking Toni into a bottle of wine.

  “Hey, Hol! Yoohoo, you’re not allowed to be fuck drunk after one kiss,” Screw said, making her jump.

  “Huh?” Holly blinked at the four people staring at her.

  The four people who were also snickering.

  Whatever. “Maybe you shouldn’t judge ’till you’ve been kissed by LJ.” And what lethal kisses they were.

  With a snort, Screw
gave her a wink. “I’ve tried, but he always turns me down.”

  Huh? Holly shot a look to Jazz who just pursed her lips.

  From the coffee table in front of her, Holly’s phone buzzed. Her father’s name appeared on the screen and just like that the wine soured in her stomach.

  Dad: We need to chat. You home?

  Oh, God, they so needed to chat. Ever since the night of her date with Schwartz, Holly had been avoiding both her parents. What the hell was she supposed to say? They had to have found out she was at the clubhouse party during the raid. Schwartz wouldn’t have kept that tidbit to himself. Which meant they had to be flipping out.

  And that meant at some point, Holly was going to have to make a choice. Stay on the path they’d laid out for her as she’d been doing since she was twelve. Allow them to hold her back from experiencing life, though that was never their intention. They only wanted to keep her safe. Or for the first time in her life, stand on her own two feet and chase after something she wanted. Even if that broke out of the safe little box her parents trapped her in. Problem was, asserting her independence came with a heaping side order of guilt. Even without the wrench of LJ in the mix, knowing she’d be causing her parents sleepless nights and serious stress ate away at her. There had to be a middle ground where they didn’t try to control her but weren’t constantly afraid of receiving a phone call about her death.

  Holly: Out with friends. Lunch tomorrow?

  Dad: What friends? Need me to send a patrol car to follow you home?

  Hell no!

  Holly: No! DO NOT DO THAT!

  Dad: You’re safe?

  Holly: Of course. Diner tomorrow at 12?

  The three bubbles appeared then disappeared three times before he finally agreed and said goodbye. Yeah, decision made, they needed boundaries. She’d have died if a patrol car showed up to escort her the five miles to her home like she was some untrustworthy kid. She’d just have to work her ass off to make them see her point of view.

  LJ returned, holding up a bottle of red, two plastic cups, and wearing a grin. “Ready?”

  “Let’s do it.”

  “What’s wrong?” His arms dropped to his side. “You okay?”