One Thousand and One Nights

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by Richard Burton


  Shall I from Cairo wend and leave the sweets of its delight? What

  sojourn after it indeed were worth a longing thought?

  How shall I leave its fertile plains, whose earth unto the scent

  Is very perfume, for the land contains no thing that’s

  naught?

  It is indeed for loveliness a very Paradise, With all its goodly

  carpet spread and cushions richly wrought.

  A town that maketh heart and eye yearn with its goodliness,

  Uniting all that of devout and profligate is sought,

  Or comrades true, by God His grace conjoined in brotherhood,

  Their meeting-place the groves of palms that cluster round

  about.

  O men of Cairo, if it be God’s will that I depart, Let bonds of

  friendship and of love unite us still in thought!

  Name not the city to the breeze, lest for its rival lands It

  steal the perfumes, wherewithal its garden-ways are fraught.

  ‘And if,’ added my father, ‘you saw its gardens in the evenings, with the tree-shadows sloping over them, you would behold a marvel and incline to them with delight.’ And they fell to describing Cairo and the Nile. When I heard their accounts of Cairo, my mind dwelt on it and I longed to visit it; and when they had done talking, each went to his own dwelling. As for me, I slept not that night, for stress of yearning after Egypt, nor was meat nor drink pleasant to me. After awhile, my uncles prepared to set out for Cairo, and I wept before my father, till he made ready for me merchandise and consented to my going wish them, saying to them, ‘Let him not enter Egypt, but leave him to sell his goods at Damascus.’ Then I took leave of my father and we left Mosul and journeyed till we reached Aleppo, where we abode some days. Then we fared on, till we came to Damascus and found it a city as it were a paradise, abounding in trees and rivers and birds and fruits of all kinds. We alighted at one of the Khans, where my uncles tarried awhile, selling and buying: and they sold my goods also at a profit of five dirhems on every one, to my great satisfaction; after which they left me and went on to Egypt, whilst I abode at Damascus in a handsome house, such as the tongue fails to describe, which I had hired for two dinars a month. Here I remained, eating and drinking and spending the money in my hands, till, one day, as I sat at the door of my lodging, there came up a young lady, clad in costly apparel, never saw my eyes richer. I winked at her; and she entered without hesitation. I entered with her and shut the door, and she raised her kerchief and did off her veil, when I found her of surpassing beauty, and love of her took hold upon my heart. So I rose and fetched a tray of the most delicate viands and fruits and all that was needed for a carouse, and we ate and sported and drank till we were warm with wine. Then I lay with her the most delightful of nights, till the morning, when I offered to give her ten dinars; but she frowned and knit her brows and said, ‘For shame! Thinkest thou I covet thy money?’ And she took out from the bosom of her shift ten dinars and laid them before me, saying, ‘By Allah, except thou take them, I will never come back!’ So I accepted them, and she said to me, ‘O my beloved, expect me again in three days’ time, when I will be with thee between sundown and nightfall; and do thou provide us with these dinars the like of yesterday’s entertainment.’ So saying, she bade me adieu and went away, taking my reason with her. At the end of the three days, she came again, dressed in gold brocade and wearing richer ornaments than before. I had made ready a repast; so we ate and drank and lay together, as before, till the morning, when she gave me other ten dinars and appointed me again for three days thence. Accordingly, I made ready as before, and at the appointed time she came again, more richly dressed than ever, and said to me, ‘O my lord, am I not fair?’ ‘Yea, by Allah!’ answered I. Then she said, ‘Wilt thou give me leave to bring with me a young lady handsomer than I and younger, that she may frolic with us and that thou and she may laugh and make merry and rejoice her heart, for she has been sad at heart this long time past and has asked me to let her go out and spend the night abroad with me?’ ‘Ay, by Allah!’ answered I; and we drank till we were warm with wine and slept together till the morning, when she gave me twenty dinars and said to me, ‘Add to thy usual provision, on account of the young lady who will come with me.’ Then she went away, and on the fourth day, I made ready as usual, and soon after sundown she came, accompanied by another damsel, wrapped in a veil. They entered and sat down; and when I saw them, I repeated the following verses:

  How lovely and how pleasant is our day! The railer’s absent,

  reckless of our play,

  Love and delight and wine with us abide, Each one enough to charm

  the wit away;

  The full moon glitters through the falling veil;

  Bough-like, the shapes within the vestments sway:

  The rose blooms in the cheeks, and in the eyes Narcissus

  languishes, in soft decay.

  Delight with those I love fulfilled for me And life, as I would

  have it, fair and gay!

  Then I lighted the candles and received them with joy and gladness. They put off their outer clothing, and the new damsel unveiled her face, when I saw that she was like the moon at its full, never beheld I one more beautiful. Then I rose and set meat and drink before them, and we ate and drank: and I began to feed the new damsel and to fill her cup and drink with her. At this the first lady was secretly jealous and said to me, ‘Is not this girl more charming than I?’ ‘Ay, by Allah!’ replied I. Quoth she, ‘It is my intent that thou lie with her this night.’ And I answered, ‘On my head and eyes!’ Then she rose and spread the bed for us, and I took the young lady and lay with her that night till the morning, when I awoke and found myself wet, as I thought, with sweat. I sat up and tried to rouse the damsel, but when I shook her by the shoulders, her head rolled off the pillow. Thereupon my reason fled and I cried out, saying, ‘O gracious Protector, extend to me Thy protection!’ Then I saw that she had been murdered, and the world became black in my sight and I sought the lady my first mistress, but could not find her. So I knew that it was she who had murdered the girl, out of jealousy, and said, ‘There is no power and no virtue but in God the Most High, the Supreme! What is to be done?’ I considered awhile, then rose and taking off my clothes, dug a hole midmost the courtyard, in which I laid the dead girl, with her jewellery and ornaments, and throwing back the earth over her, replaced the marble of the pavement. After this I washed and put on clean clothes and taking what money I had left, locked up the house and took courage and went to the owner of the house, to whom I paid a year’s rent, telling him that I was about to join my uncles at Cairo. Then I set out and journeying to Egypt, foregathered with my uncles, who rejoiced in me and I found that they had made an end of selling their goods. They enquired the reason of my coming, and I said, ‘I yearned after you;’ but did not let them know that I had any money with me. I abode with them a year, enjoying the pleasures of the city and the Nile and squandering the rest of my money in feasting and drinking, till the time drew near for my uncles’ departure when I hid myself from them and they sought for me, but could hear no news of me and said, ‘He must have gone back to Damascus.’ So they departed, and I came out from my hiding and sojourned in Cairo three years, sending year by year the rent of the house at Damascus to its owner, until at last I had nothing left but one year’s rent. At this my breast was straitened and I set out and journeyed till I reached Damascus, where my landlord received me with joy. I alighted at the house and found everything locked up as I had left it: so I opened the closets and took out what was in them and found under the bed, where I had lain with the murdered girl, a necklet of gold set with jewels. I took it up and cleansing it of her blood, examined it and wept awhile. Then I abode in the house two days and on the third day, I went to the bath and changed my clothes. I had now no money left and the devil prompted me to sell the necklet, that destiny might be accomplished; so I took it to the market and handed it to a broker, who made m
e sit down in the shop of my landlord and waited till the market was full, when he took the necklet and offered it for sale privily without my knowledge. The price bidden for it was two thousand dinars; but the broker returned and said to me, ‘This necklet is a brass counterfeit of Frank manufacture, and a thousand dirhems have been bidden for it.’ ‘Yes,’ answered I; ‘I knew it to be brass, for we had it made for such an one, that we might mock her: and now my wife has inherited it and we wish to sell it; so go and take the thousand dirhems.’ When the broker heard this, his suspicions were roused; so he carried the necklet to the chief of the market, who took it to the prefect of police and said to him, ‘This necklet was stolen from me, and we have found the thief in the habit of a merchant.’ So the officers fell on me unawares and brought me to the prefect, who questioned me and I told him what I had told the broker: but he laughed and said, ‘This is not the truth.’ Then, before I knew what was toward, his people stripped me and beat me with rods on my sides, till for the smart of the blows I said, ‘I did steal it,’ bethinking me that it was better to confess that I stole it than let them know that she who owned it had been murdered in my house, lest they should put me to death for her. So they wrote down that I had stolen it and cut off my hand. The stump they seared with boiling oil and I swooned away: but they gave me wine to drink, and I revived and taking up my hand, was returning to my lodging, when the landlord said to me, ‘After what has passed, thou must leave my house and look for another lodging, since thou art convicted of theft.’ ‘O my lord,’ said I, ‘have patience with me two or three days, till I look me out a new lodging.’ ‘So be it,’ he answered and I returned to the house, where I sat weeping and saying, ‘How shall I return to my people with my hand cut off and they know not that I am innocent?’ Then I abode in sore trouble and perplexity for two days, and on the third day the landlord came in to me, and with him some officers of police and the chief of the market, who had accused me of stealing the necklace. I went out to them and enquired what was the matter, but they seized on me, without further parley, and tied my hands behind me and put a chain about my neck, saying, ‘The necklet that was with thee has been shown to the Governor of Damascus, and he recognizes it as one that belonged to his daughter, who has been missing these three years.’ When I heard this, my heart sank within me, and I said to myself, ‘I am lost without resource; but I must needs tell the governor my story; and if he will, let him kill me, and if he will, let him pardon me.’ So they carried me to the governor’s house and made me stand before him. When he saw me, he looked at me out of the corner of his eye and said to those present, ‘Why did ye cut off his hand? This man is unfortunate and hath committed no offense; and indeed ye wronged him in cutting off his hand.’ When I heard this, I took heart and said to him, ‘By Allah, O my lord, I am no thief! But they accused me of this grave offence and beat me with rods in the midst of the market, bidding me confess, till for the pain of the beating, I lied against myself and confessed to the theft, although I am innocent.’ ‘Fear not,’ said the governor; ‘no harm shall come to thee.’ Then he laid the chief of the market under arrest, saying to him, ‘Give this man the price of his hand, or I will hang thee and seize on all thy goods.’ And he cried out to the officers, who took him and dragged him away, leaving me with the governor, who made his people unbind me and take the chain off my neck. Then he looked at me and said, ‘O my son, speak the truth and tell me how thou camest by the necklet.’ And he repeated the following verse:

  To tell the whole truth is thy duty, although It bring thee to burn on the brasier of woe!

  ‘By Allah, O my lord,’ answered I, ‘such is my intent!’ And I told him all that had passed between me and the first lady and how she had brought the second one to me and had slain her out of jealousy. When he heard my story, he shook his head and beat hand upon hand; then putting his handkerchief to his eyes, wept awhile and repeated the following verses:

  I see that Fortune’s maladies are many upon me, For, every

  dweller in the world, sick unto death is he.

  To every gathering of friends there comes a parting day: And few

  indeed on earth are those that are from parting free?

  Then he turned to me and said, ‘Know, O my son, that she who first came to thee was my eldest daughter. I brought her up in strict seclusion and when she came to womanhood, I sent her to Cairo and married her to my brother’s son. After awhile, he died and she came back to me: but she had learnt profligate habits from the natives of Cairo: so she visited thee four times and at last brought her younger sister. Now they were sisters by the same mother and much attached to each other; and when this happened to the elder, she let her sister into her secret, and she desired to go out with her. So she asked thy leave and carried her to thee; after which she returned alone, and I questioned her of her sister, finding her weeping for her; but she said, “I know nothing of her.” However, after this, she told her mother privily what had happened and how she had killed her sister; and her mother told me. Then she ceased not to weep and say, “By Allah, I will never leave weeping for her till I die!” And so it fell out. This, O my son, is what happened, and now I desire that thou baulk me not in what I am about to say to thee; it is that I purpose to marry thee to my youngest daughter, for she is a virgin and born of another mother, and I will take no dower from thee, but on the contrary will appoint thee an allowance, and thou shalt be to me as my very son.’ ‘I will well,’ replied I; ‘how could I hope for such good fortune?’ Then he sent at once for the Cadi and the witnesses and married me to his daughter, and I went in to her. Moreover, he got me a large sum of money from the chief of the market and I became in high favour with him. Soon after, news came to me that my father was dead so the governor despatched a courier to fetch me the property he had left behind him, and now I am living in all prosperity. This is how I came to lose my right hand.” His story amazed me (continued the Jew) and I abode with him three days, after which he gave me much money and I set out and travelled, till I reached this thy city. The sojourn liked me well, so I took up my abode here and there befell me what thou knowest with the hunchback.’ Quoth the King, ‘This thy story is not more wonderful than that of the hunchback, and I will certainly hang you all. However, there still remains the tailor, who was the head of the offending.’ Then he said to the tailor, ‘O tailor, if thou canst tell me aught more wonderful than the story of the hunchback, I will pardon you all your offenses.’ So the tailor came forward and said, ‘Know, O King of the age, that a most rare thing happened to me yesterday before I fell in with the hunchback.

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  The Tailor’s Story.

  Yesterday morning early I was at an entertainment given by a friend of mine, at which there were assembled near twenty men of the people of the city, amongst them tailors and silk-weavers and carpenters and other craftsmen. As soon as the sun had risen, they set food before us that we might eat, when behold, the master of the house entered, and with him a comely young man, a stranger from Baghdad, dressed in the finest of clothes and perfectly handsome, except that he was lame. He saluted us, while we rose to receive him; and he was about to sit down, when he espied amongst us a certain barber; whereupon he refused to sit and would have gone away. But we stopped him and the host seized him and adjured him, saying, “What is the reason of thy coming in and going out again at once?” “By Allah, O my lord,” answered he, “do not hinder me, for the cause of my turning back is yonder barber of ill-omen sitting there.” When the host heard this, he wondered and said, “How comes this young man, who is from Baghdad. to be troubled in his mind about this barber?” Then we looked at the young man and said to him, “Tell us the reason of thine anger against the barber.” “O company,” replied he, “there befell me a strange adventure with this barber in my native city of Baghdad; he was the cause of the breaking of my leg and of my lameness, and I have sworn that I will never sit in the same place with him nor tarry in any cit
y of which he is an inhabitant. I left Baghdad, to be rid of him, and took up my abode in this city and lo, I find him with you! But now not another night shall pass, before I depart hence.” So we begged him to sit down and tell us what had passed between him and the barber in Baghdad, whereat the latter changed colour and hung down his head. Then said the young man, “Know, O company, that my father was one of the chief merchants of Baghdad, and God had vouchsafed him no child but myself. When I grew up to man’s estate, my father was translated to the mercy of God, leaving me great wealth in money and slaves and servants, and I began to dress handsomely and feed daintily. Now God had made me a hater of women, and one day, as I was going along one of the streets of Baghdad, a company of women stopped the way before me; so I fled from them, and entering a by-street without an outlet, sat down upon a stone bench at the other end. I had not sat long, before the lattice of one of the houses in the street opened and a young lady, as she were the moon at its full, never in my life saw I her like, put forth her head and began to water some flowers she had on the balcony. Then she turned right and left and seeing me watching her, smiled and shut the window and went away. Therewithal, fire flamed up in my heart and my mind was taken up with her, and my hatred (of women) was changed to love. I continued sitting there, lost to the world, till sundown, when the Cadi of the city came riding up the street, with slaves before him and servants behind him, and alighting, entered the very house at which the young lady had appeared. By this I guessed that he was her father; so I went home, sorrowful, and fell on my bed, oppressed with melancholy thoughts. My women came in to me and sat round me, puzzled to know what ailed me; but I would not speak to them nor answer their questions, and they wept and lamented over me. Presently, in came an old woman, who looked at me and saw at once what was the matter with me. So she sat down at my head and spoke me fair and said, ‘O my son, tell me what ails thee, and I will bring thee to thy desire.’ So I told her what had happened to me, and she said, ‘O my son, this girl is the Cadi’s daughter of Baghdad; she is kept in strict seclusion, and the window at which thou sawest her is that of her apartment, where she dwells alone, her father occupying a great suite of rooms underneath. I often visit her, and thou shalt not come at her but through me; so gird thy middle and be of good cheer.’ So saying, she went away, whilst I took comfort at what she said and arose in the morning well, to the great satisfaction of my people. By-and-by the old woman came in, chopfallen, and said to me, ‘O my son, do not ask how I have fared with her! When I opened the subject to her, she said to me, “An thou leave not this talk, pestilent hag that thou art, I will assuredly use thee as thou deserves!” But needs must I have at her again.’ When I heard this, it added sickness to my sickness: but after some days, the old woman came again and said to me, ‘O my son, I must have of thee a present for good news.’ With this, life returned to me, and I said, ‘Whatever thou wilt is thine.’ Then said she, ‘O my son, I went yesterday to the young lady, who seeing me broken-spirited and tearful-eyed, said to me, “O my aunt, what ails thee that I see thy heart thus straitened?” Whereupon I wept and replied, “O my lady, I am just come from a youth who loves thee and is like to die for thy sake.” Quoth she (and indeed her heart was moved to pity), “And who is this youth of whom thou speakest?” “He is my son,” answered I, “and the darling of my heart. He saw thee, some days since, at the window, tending thy flowers, and fell madly in love with thee. I told him what passed between thee and me the other day, whereupon his disorder increased and he took to his bed and will surely die.” At this her colour changed and she said, “Is all this on my account?” “Yea, by Allah!” answered I. “What wouldst thou have me do?” Then said she, “Go back to him and salute him for me and tell him that my sufferings are twice as great as his. And on Friday, before the time of prayer, let him come hither and I will come down and open the door to him. Then I will carry him to my chamber, where we can converse awhile and he can go away, before my father comes back from the mosque.”’ When I heard this, my anguish ceased and my heart was comforted. So I took off the clothes I was wearing and gave them to the old woman; and she said, ‘Be of good cheer.’ ‘There is no pain left in me,’ answered I; and she went away. My household and friends rejoiced in my restoration to health, and I abode thus till Friday, when the old woman entered and asked me how I did, to which I replied that I was well and in good case. Then I dressed and perfumed myself and sat down to await the going in of the folk to the mosque, that I might betake myself to the young lady. But the old woman said to me, ‘Thou hast time and to spare; so thou wouldst do well to go to the bath and have thy head shaved, to do away the traces of thy disorder.’ ‘It is well thought,’ answered I; ‘I will first have my head shaved and then go to the bath.’ Then I said to my servant, ‘Go to the market and bring me a barber, and look that he be no meddler, but a man of sense, who will not split my head with his much talk.’ So he went out and returned with this wretched old man. When he came in, he saluted me, and I returned his salutation. Then said he, ‘Surely, I see thee thin of body.’ And I replied, ‘I have been ill.’ Quoth he, ‘God cause affliction and trouble and anxiety to depart from thee!’ ‘May God hear thy prayer!’ answered I: and he said, ‘Be of good cheer, O my lord, for indeed recovery is come to thee. Dost thou wish to be polled or let blood? Indeed, it is reported, on the authority of Ibn Abbas (whom God accept!), that the Prophet said, “Whoso is polled on a Friday, God shall avert from him threescore and ten diseases;” and again, “He who is cupped on a Friday is safe from loss of sight and a host of other ailments.”’ ‘Leave this talk,’ said I; ‘come, shave my head at once, for I am yet weak.’ With this he pulled out a handkerchief, from which he took an astrolabe with seven plates, mounted in silver, and going into the courtyard, held the instrument up to the sun’s rays and looked for some time. Then he came back and said to me, ‘Know that eight degrees and six minutes have elapsed of this our day, which is Friday, the tenth of Sefer, in the six hundred and fifty-third year of the Flight of the Prophet (upon whom be the most excellent of blessing and peace!) and the seven thousand three hundred and twentieth year of the Alexandrian era, and the planet now in the ascendant, according to the rules of mathematics, is Mars, which being in conjunction with Mercury, denotes a favourable time for cutting hair; and this also indicates to me that thou purposest to foregather with some one and that your interview will be propitious; but after this there occurs a sign, respecting a thing which I will not name to thee.’ ‘By Allah,’ exclaimed I, ‘thou weariest me and pesterest me with thy foolish auguries, when I only sent for thee to shave my head! So come, shave me at once and give me no more talk.’ ‘By Allah,’ rejoined he, ‘if thou knewest what is about to befall thee, thou wouldst do nothing this day; and I counsel thee to do as I shall tell thee, by observation of the stars.’ ‘By Allah,’ said I, ‘I never saw a barber skilled in astrology except thee: but I think and know that thou art prodigal of idle talk. I sent for thee to shave my head, and thou plaguest me with this sorry prate!’ ‘What more wouldst thou have!’ replied he. ‘God hath vouchsafed thee a barber, who is an astrologer, versed in the arts of alchemy and white magic, syntax, grammar and lexicology, rhetoric and logic, arithmetic, astronomy and geometry, as well as in the knowledge of the Law and the Traditions of the Prophet and in exegesis. Moreover, I have read many books and digested them and have had experience of affairs and understand them thoroughly. In short, I have examined into all things and studied all arts and crafts and sciences and mastered them; and thy father loved me because of my lack of officiousness, for which reason my service is obligatory on thee. I am no meddler, as thou pretendest, and on this account I am known as the Silent, the Grave One. Wherefore it behoves thee to give thanks to God and not cross me for I am a true counsellor to thee and take an affectionate interest in thee. I would I were in thy service a whole year, that thou mightst do me justice: and I would ask no hire of thee for this.’ When I heard this, I said, ‘Thou wilt certainly be the death of me t
his day!’ ‘O my lord,’ replied he, ‘I am he whom the folk call the Silent, by reason of my few words, to distinguish me from my six brothers, the eldest of whom was called Becbac, the second Heddar, the third Fekic, the fourth El Kouz el Aswani, the fifth El Feshar, the sixth Shecashic and the seventh (myself) Samit.’ Whilst he thus overwhelmed me with his talk, I thought my gall-bladder would burst so I said to the servant, ‘Give him a quarter-dinar and let him go, for God’s sake! I won’t have my head shaved to-day.’ ‘What words are these, O my lord?’ said he. ‘By Allah, I will take no hire of thee till I have served thee; and needs must I serve thee, for indeed it is incumbent on me to do so and fulfil thy need; and I care not if I take no money of thee. If thou knowest not my worth, I know thine; and I owe thy father (may God the Most High have mercy on him!) many a kindness, for he was a generous man. By Allah, he sent for me one day as it were this blessed day, and I went in to him and found a company of his friends with him. He would have had me let him blood; but I pulled out my astrolabe and taking an altitude for him, found the aspect inauspicious and the hour unfavourable for the letting of blood. I told him of this and he conformed to my advice and put off the operation to a more convenient season. So I recited the following verses in his honour:

 

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