I came one day unto my lord, that I might let him blood, But
found that for his body’s health the season was not good;
So sat me down and talked with him of many a pleasant thing And
all the treasures of my mind before him freely strewed.
Well pleased, he listened, then, “O mine of knowledge!” he did
say, “Thy wit and wisdom overpass the bounds of likelihood!”
“Not so,” quoth I; “my wit indeed were little, but for thee, O
prince of men, that pour’st on me thy wisdom like a flood!
Thou seem’st indeed the lord of grace, bounty and excellence,
World’s treasure-house of knowledge, wit, sense and
mansuetude!”
Thy father was charmed and cried out to the servant, saying, “Give him a hundred and three dinars and a dress of honour.” The servant did as he bade, and I waited till a favourable moment, when I let him blood; and he did not cross me, but thanked me, and all present also praised me. When the cupping was over, I could not help saying to him, “By Allah, O my lord, what made thee say to the servant, ‘Give him a hundred and three dinars’?” Quoth he, “One dinar was for the astrological observation, another for thine entertaining converse, the third for the bloodletting and the remaining hundred and the dress for thy verses in my honour.”’ ‘May God show no mercy to my father,’ exclaimed I, ‘for knowing the like of thee?’ He laughed and said, ‘There is no god but God and Mohammed is His Apostle! Glory be to Him who changes but is not changed! I took thee for a man of sense; but I see thou dotest for illness. God says, in His precious Book, that Paradise is prepared for “those who restrain their wrath and forgive men”, and in any case thou art excused. But I am ignorant of the cause of thy haste, and thou must know that thy father and grandfather did nothing without consulting me, for indeed it is said that he with whom one takes counsel should be trustworthy and that he who takes counsel shall not be disappointed. It is said also that he who hath not an elder (to advise him) will never be an elder himself; and indeed the poet says:
Ere thou decide to venture thyself in aught, Consult an experienced man and cross him not.
And indeed thou wilt find none better versed in affairs than I, and I am here standing on my feet to serve thee. I am not vexed with thee: why shouldst thou be vexed with me? But I will bear with thee for the sake of the favours I owe thy father.’ ‘By Allah,’ exclaimed I, ‘O thou whose tongue is as long as a jackass’s tail, thou persistest in pestering me with talk and pelting me with words, when all I want of thee is to shave my head and take thyself off!’ Then he lathered my head, saying, ‘I know that thou art vexed with me, but I bear thee no malice; for thy wit is weak and thou art a boy: it was but yesterday I took thee on my shoulders and carried thee to the school’ ‘O my brother,’. cried I, ‘for God’s sake, do what I want and go thy way!’ And I rent my clothes. When he saw me do this, he took the razor and fell to sharpening it and stinted not, till I was well-nigh distraught. Then he came up to me and shaved a part of my head, then held his hand and said, ‘O my lord, hurry is of the Devil and deliberation of the Merciful One. Methinks thou knowest not my station; verily my hand falls on the heads of kings and amirs and viziers and sages and learned men: and it was of me the poet said:
All the trades are like necklets of jewels and gold And this
barber indeed’s the chief pearl of the strings.
He excelleth all others that boast of their skill. And under his
hand are the topknots of kings.’
‘Leave what concerns thee not,’ said I: ‘indeed thou hast straitened my breast and troubled my mind.’ Quoth he, Meseems thou art in haste. ‘Yes, yes, yes!’ answered I, and he, ‘Thou wouldst do well to proceed with deliberation, for haste is of the Devil and bequeaths repentance and disappointment. Verily he upon whom be blessing and peace hath said, “The best affair is that which is undertaken with deliberation.” By Allah, thy case troubles me, and I would have thee let me know what it is thou art in such haste to do, for I fear me it is other than good.’ Then said he, ‘It wants three hours yet of the time of prayer. However, I do not wish to be in doubt as to this, but am minded to know the time for certain; for speech, when it is conjectural, is but faulty, especially in the like of me, whose merit is plain and known of all men; and it does not befit me to talk at random, as do the common sort of astrologers.’ So saying, he threw down the razor and taking up the astrolabe, went out under the sun and stood a long while, after which he returned and said to me, ‘It wants three hours of the time of prayer, neither more nor less.’ ‘By Allah,’ answered I, ‘hold thy tongue, for thou breakest my heart in pieces!’ So he took his razor and after sharpening it as before, shaved another part of my head. Then he said, ‘I am concerned about thy haste; and indeed thou wouldst do well to tell me the cause of it, for thou knowest that thy father and grandfather did nothing without my counsel.’ When I saw that there was no getting rid of him, I said to myself, ‘The time of prayer draws near and I wish to go to her before the folk come out from the mosque. If I am delayed much longer, I know not how I shall come at her.’ Then I said to him, ‘Be quick and leave this prating and officiousness, for I have to go to an entertainment at the house of one of my friends.’ When he heard me speak of an entertainment, he said, ‘This thy day is a blessed one for me! Verily, yesterday I invited a party of my intimate friends and I have forgotten to provide aught for them to eat. I bethought me of it but now, on hearing thee speak of an entertainment. Alack, how I shall be disgraced in their eyes!’ ‘Be in no concern for that,’ answered I. ‘Have I not told thee that I am bidden abroad to-day? All the meat and drink in the house shall be thine, so thou despatch my affair and make haste to shave my head.’ ‘God requite thee with good!’ rejoined he. ‘Tell me what thou hast for my guests, that I may know.’ Quoth I, ‘I have five dishes of meat and ten fricasseed fowls and a roasted lamb.’ ‘Bring them out to me,’ said he, ‘that I may see them.’ So I had all this brought, and when he saw it, he said, ‘There lacks the wine.’ ‘I have a flagon or two in the house,’ answered I; and he said, ‘Have it brought out.’ So I sent for it, and he exclaimed, ‘God bless thee for a generous soul! But there are still the perfumes and the essences.’ So I brought him a box, containing fifty dinars’ worth of aloes-wood and ambergris and musk and other perfumes. By this, the time began to run short and my heart was straitened; so I said to him, ‘Take it all and finish shaving my head, by the life of Mohammed, whom God bless and preserve!’ ‘By Allah,’ said he, ‘I will not take it till I see all that is in it.’ So I made the servant open the box, and the barber threw down the astrolabe and sitting down on the ground, turned over the contents, till I was well-nigh distracted. Then he took the razor and coming up to me, shaved some little of my head and recited the following verse:
The boy after his father’s guise grows up and follows suit As surely as the tree springs up from out its parent root.
Then said he, ‘O my son, I know not whether to thank thee or thy father; for my entertainment to-day is all due to thy kindness and liberality, and none of my company is worthy of it; though I have none but men of consideration, such as Zentout the bath-keeper and Selya the corn-chandler and Silet the bean-seller and Akresheh the grocer and Hemid the scavenger and Said the camel-driver and Suweyd the porter and Abou Mukarish the bathman and Cassim the watchman and Kerim the groom. There is not among them all one curmudgeon or make-bate or meddler or spoil-sport; each has his own dance that he dances and his own couplets that he repeats, and the best of them is that they are like thy servant, knowing not abundance of talk nor meddlesomeness. The bath-keeper sings enchantingly to the tambourine and dances and says, “I am going, O my mother, to fill my jar!” As for the corn-chandler, he brings more skill to it than any of them; he dances and says, “O mourner, my mistress, thou dost not fall short!” and draws the very heart out of one for laughing at him. Whilst the scavenger sings, so that the birds sto
p to listen to him, and dances and says, “News with my wife is not kept in a chest!” And indeed he is a witty, accomplished rogue, and of his excellence I use to say the following:
One Thousand and One Nights Page 183